


Lizbob Supernatural Watching Notes (season 6)

by lizbobjones



Series: Lizbob Supernatural Watching Notes [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Archived From Tumblr, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Fanwork Research & Reference Guides, Meta, Meta Essay, Non Fiction, archived from elizabethrobertajones blog, watching notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-12 00:14:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 112,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16862653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizbobjones/pseuds/lizbobjones
Summary: Or: Amazingly, I thought I was gonna be done with these rewatches and then executive meddling occurred (I spent 3 days out of commission and have officially passed the “stay up for 8 consecutive days to rewatch all of seasons 6-10 before season 11 starts” line from which there is more TV show than time especially since I am STILL technically out of commission) and so, like with season 6 clunking into motion on the back of the apocalypse, here I am.I wrote a longer meta on themes which I outlined in the 15 minutes I thought I was going to be able to do the marathon and write up some stuff later, and therefore completed it separately. It will be included with this chapter :)





	1. 6x01

**Author's Note:**

> Or: Amazingly, I thought I was gonna be done with these rewatches and then executive meddling occurred (I spent 3 days out of commission and have officially passed the “stay up for 8 consecutive days to rewatch all of seasons 6-10 before season 11 starts” line from which there is more TV show than time especially since I am STILL technically out of commission) and so, like with season 6 clunking into motion on the back of the apocalypse, here I am. 
> 
> I wrote a longer meta on themes which I outlined in the 15 minutes I thought I was going to be able to do the marathon and write up some stuff later, and therefore completed it separately. It will be included with this chapter :)

##  [I… think I’d like to take you up on that beer.](https://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130232794973/i-think-id-like-to-take-you-up-on-that-beer)

Okay so the quote is from Swan Song, but at the exact point the season opens I think it’s all you need to say about Dean and Lisa as a way to bridge this gap and describe the year out. I see the djinn dream + El Sol beer + Carmen = Lisa comparison on my dash every so often, but I’ve never really seen anyone write much about it aside from pointing out it’s there, and I’d kind of like to explore that parallel, the fact there’s djinn involved in both, and season 6′s general themes.

6x01 opens with the little montage of Dean’s Happy Domestic Adventure (intercut with Crippling Brothers Nostalgia and clever parallels to Dean’s civvie work and his history as a hunter), which ends with the season 6 title card. The smashing glass effect is a pretty pertinent theme of the season: there’s multiple different walls between realities/worlds broken (with The French Mistake having them literally jump through broken glass to go to another universe if it wasn’t clear enough) and there’s Sam’s mental wall against the hell memories. 

I always kind of figured it was mostly for these later plot things especially Sam’s wall, but in context of its first appearance, it actually makes quite a powerful statement, showing Dean in this bubble of, literally as the title of the episode expresses, suburban isolation. Then it’s shattered, and the first thing we see on screen of non-montage-y or flashback-y stuff is the djinn who’s the Monster of the Week on one side of the screen, and an El Sol sign in the background on the other, with Dean between them:

I’m just going to link to this collection of El Sol signs from [justanotheridijiton](http://tmblr.co/msbbZom6stVUaSwCo2j0eeQ) and draw your attention to where the brand first came from, and how because of that its presence generally implies altered reality or concealed truths, dreams, and so on (and specifically because of its origin and so for the sake of this episode a real warning of what’s going on, djinn):

<http://justanotheridijiton.tumblr.com/post/109050865114/el-sol-kripke-2x20-4x22-5x18-gamble-6x01>

The parallels between Lisa and Carmen are fairly on the nose even without this El Sol link: in 2x20 Dean is dropped down in what he thinks is a wish!verse rather than a hallucination (interesting that season 6’s themes include multiple alternate universes, considering Dean’s mistaken assumption of that episode) and Carmen shows up as an incidental character, his girlfriend he automatically lives with in a pre-made relationship in terms of the episode and what he wakes up with, who magically sees to his needs with beer and comfort, and is supportive to him without question. In some ways we even know more about Carmen, as we never actually find out details about Lisa like her job (all we have to go on is still the snippet about her being a yoga instructor years before we ever meet her in canon), and there’s much more focus on what Dean has got out of the relationship and the details of his normal life.

Obviously as season 6 goes on Lisa is fleshed out emotionally (though in this episode she is largely still just perfect and supportive and going along with everything very considerately), and the impact of Dean dropping into her life out of pretty much nowhere is explored, and she is given an arc where she handles herself and their relationship in a mature way, looks out for Ben with sensible priorities, and generally gets some consideration for her point of view on the matter which had been mostly lacking, especially since her re-introduction in season 5.

In season 3, though, she basically just picked up where Carmen left off in terms of Dean’s wish fulfilment/apple pie life related longing symbolism in the early seasons - after catching up with the real thing in 3x02 (which conveniently also first names the Campbells and kills most of them off, off-screen, so is generally where most of season 6′s start is scavenged from), we see Lisa again in Dean’s dream in [3x10](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.homeofthenutty.com%2Fsupernatural%2Fscreencaps%2Fdisplayimage.php%3Falbum%3D54%26pid%3D12861%23top_display_media&t=NGJmM2NlZWI4YzE5ZjNlMDEzM2UxMzVmZDViM2YxODc0Njc2NjJjYixYT01hQTh1Nw%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F130232794973%2Fi-think-id-like-to-take-you-up-on-that-beer&m=1):

She represents a could-have-been in this case, I think the point being that Ben  _wasn’t_  Dean’s son partially to show how he missed out on this life and the idea that it could be his was wrong, for the sake of season 3′s themes, where he is contemplating his impending death and so his visit to Lisa is a reminder that this domestic life is something he can never have. The same vague desire without a deadline to cut it off created Carmen (or at least made her presence in the dream something he happily rolled with) and this desire just takes on Lisa’s face in season 3 when it becomes a more pressing issue that he can never have it, and [I noticed in my rewatch](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/126363051183/ibelieveinthelittletreetopper-i-wonder-what) through the season that there was a pattern specifically of Sera Gamble’s episodes prodding at Dean vs the domestic life he now knew he’d never get since he was going to Hell.

In season 5, probably with the knowledge of a pending season 6, Lisa flipped around from a could-have-been dream girl to suddenly being the trophy at the end of the apocalypse thanks to this previous status in the show’s language of Dean symbolism (ugh female characters being symbols. I am so glad she got even a LITTLE consideration as an actual human being after this point and in her actual appearance in 3x02 for what good that did at first :P), and basically she just offered a ready-made family and a settled, civilian life that Dean could drop into, as easily as accepting that Carmen was now just randomly his girlfriend without all the awkward stages of falling in love in and coming to this arrangement over a long space of time in between character introduction and an urgently needed haven for Dean to stay in. 

2x20 was also the first and so far until this episode only time we had djinn as the MotW and as I’ve said it’s telling that the monsters come back up at this point. Despite the fact that Dean is about to spend the first third of the episode feeling like he’s loosing grip on reality as this new djinn dream/random hallucinations(? I’ve never figured out if he was unconscious the whole time or just losing touch while still walking around talking to people) creeps up on him, I’d argue that this episode is really about him waking up from one dream already, with the djinn’s power this episode not fulfilling a wish for Dean, but shattering the one he was already in with their new “worst nightmare” way of killing.

After all if he’s already in the strange sort of suburban life, with the bright lawn and flowers that calls back to Mary’s house in 2x20, and the nice apples in a bowl in the kitchen ( _fresh fruit is always a terrible sign_  … It was a thing in 2x20 as well, trust me :P Also Bobby’s dream in Dream a Little Dream of Me) and with the pre-made family, with Baby retired, he’s fulfilling a lot of superficial details of wish!verse in his real life.

This also comes around to the other theme for Dean especially in the early part of the season of the “in or out” theme. 

> Dean: Of course I didn’t leave it alone! Sue me! A damn year? You couldn’t put me out of my misery?
> 
> Bobby: Look, I get it wasn’t easy. But that’s life! And it’s as close to happiness as I’ve ever seen a hunter get. It ain’t like I wanted to lie to you, son. But you were out, Dean.
> 
> Dean: Do I look out to you?

The show generally makes it a one or the other deal - the first djinn dream had the compromise of Mary alive but an estranged relationship with Sam, and John still dead - in this case, his suspended bubble is not knowing that Sam is alive and having his civilian time with Lisa in exchange, and it’s made quite clear this is and always has been a one-or-the-other exchange, given as the reason both Bobby and Sam didn’t tell him he was back, and implicitly understood by Lisa in this episode (later confirmed in her dialogue later in the season). Through the episode he struggles with the fact Sam, Bobby and to a lesser extent Samuel agreed to keep him out of the life, while at the same time the Campbells and a little more subtly, Samuel, hold him to the double standard of getting out and not being there to help them in this new fight. He is judged and feminised by their exploration of his suburban life (making jokes about the magazine on the table, Dean glumly expecting Samuel to call him a soccer mom) and even Soulless!Sam dips in to teasing him to make a comment about him taking up golf as one of the early signs that Sam isn’t properly Sam any more. (As well as looking considerably less troubled than Bobby about the decision to keep Dean out, justifying it off past-him’s desires and I guess just hoping that’s still the best idea while pretending it’s empathy like people with souls have, if his later explanations of how he’s been handling this are anything to go by. :P)

Dean goes on in the next few episodes to try to balance his relationship with Lisa and hunting (disastrously) of trying something other than the all-or-nothing approach, which we can compare to Sam and Jess, which in early season 1 had a lot of emphasis on how lying to her and keeping her in the dark and Sam cutting off the “real world” entirely doomed her (fitting that there’s a lot of ‘waking up from a dream’ imagery for Sam in the Pilot too - being woken up at the sound of Dean moving around in the front room in the open, or when he lies down on the bed at the end only to open his eyes and unfortunately look up at Jess). (Season 8 doesn’t necessarily link djinn to Sam and Amelia but his all or nothing approach was back there, and everyone’s at least commented on how dream-like those memories were, if not outright speculating they were imaginary.) The arc quickly teaches Dean that trying to balance a life is impossible, and his stress from the job is too much to handle with worrying about Lisa and Ben at the same time. His bubble of normality he got to enjoy had definitely been shattered in this episode and there was no piecing it back together or trying to exist between two worlds, so said the grim message for him at this point in the show.

In this episode, the breaking of the dream bubble creeps up on him through, as with the broken glass of the title card, moments of pushing through boundaries between the worlds - the symbolism of hanging sheets is weirdly prevalent in the episode and considering how MUCH wandering between worlds/realms/universes there is in this season, I’m interpreting these as a sort of veil between Dean’s civilian life and being a hunter again. As soon as he is touched by the djinn at the bar in the open he is compelled to “start hunting” again, being given a random noise to investigate. 

He still keeps his gun with him in his truck, part of the paranoia where he’s never quite shaken off hunting (the montage also covering that he has several supernatural safety precautions in his civilian life).

([I really love the bit where he’s investigating](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130158937143/suburban-dad-roleplays-monster-hunter-to-alleviate))

As with 2x20 when he has his first intrusion of the “ghost girl” (later as he realises, another victim who his dim awareness of helps him break down the walls between his dream reality and the real world) we see him on the computer afterwards, looking up cases. In wish!verse it was checking basically their entire history of hunting from season 1 onwards: in this case he is using his old skills to hack records and impersonate the authorities to investigate future cases, inquiring if there was a missing person reported. Like the ghost girl being the spectre of present cases he can’t ignore, the strange scratch marks calling him to investigate are the promise of  _future_  hunts:

  


Anyway in both these instances they feature the hanging veils of dust sheets/bedsheets barriers he has to push through to continue exploring. (I suppose since he’s been building houses the hotel renovation and dust sheets are to that random house and bedsheets as a symbol of his domestic life since he has probably had to launder sheets at least once in his life at this point :P)

I think the best moment of all this symbolism is this brief shot where we see him coming up to one of these veils between worlds - the one most symbolising normal suburban life - and see Dean framed through this claw mark:

His borrowed world of the suburban torn open with this new supposed monster threat. It’s a no going back moment though he doesn’t know it, telling him his domestic holiday has sort of ended.

By the time his visions reach their conclusion about to kill him, it’s taken us to the most offensive intrusion he could imagine: Yellow Eyes, the monster that started it all off for them, back from the dead and starting a new cycle, all their work undone, so it feels:

> Azazel: Really? After all we’ve been through together? You know, you got a great little life here. Pretty Lady – real understanding. Hell of a kid. And how do you keep your lawn so green? I mean, come on, Dean. You never been what I’d call brainy, but did you really think you were gonna get to keep all of this? You had to know that we were coming for you sometime, pal. You can’t outrun your past. 

(I do like the way the specifically monster oriented arc of this season bookends itself between Azazel and “Mary”. Maybe scrabbling for nostalgia points by bringing back the familiar faces, but hey.)

Anyway, Azazel was the original push out of the door to start off season 1 (though they didn’t even know his name until season 3, or even his eye colour until the end of season 1 :P)… him obliquely threatening Lisa and Ben sounds like the beginning of a new cycle. Later in the episode when Dean is poisoned for a second time he literally sees Lisa dragged onto the ceiling and killed like Mary, and Azazel feeding Ben his blood: a strange parallel of Lisa to Mary (figures, with his idolised motherhood notions) and Ben to Sam (all those suggestions that Dean took some sort of parental role to Sam?). (I dunno if you should match them up. Anyway, roles played, Dean is officially terrified of becoming his father. :P)

Despite the fact it’s all an illusion, it has the same motivating effect on Dean for the season in general: that is, revealing to us his deepest fears about this living situation, and showing to him just how vulnerable this bubble has been (hence the shattering glass):

> Dean: I’m so sorry, Lisa.
> 
> Lisa: For what?
> 
> Dean: Those things were coming for me. And I should’ve known.
> 
> Lisa: How could you know a monster was gonna show up?
> 
> Dean: I should’ve known. I should’ve known that if I stayed with you that something would come, because something always does. But I was stupid and reckless and…You can’t outrun your past.

Lisa immediately (rightfully :P) calls him an idiot about this (this is before the second visions which presumably did much greater emotional damage and we don’t have Dean n Lisa interaction until next episode after that) but though she manages to talk him down a little and have a mature conversation about it, the damage is done and he goes into next episode paranoid about protecting them (whoops becoming his father anyway in his words, if I remember correctly). Combined with Soulless Sam’s return to his life and the mysteries posed by the Campbells for the main plot, it creates a pretty direct flipping of the Pilot, with him drawing Dean back into the life, and with the exact same imagery (thankfully minus the actual fridging) happening to Lisa. 

The dream is over.

 

* * *

 

Watching notes:

* * *

 

I like that montage but honestly Dean and his neighbour Sid. 

Dean peering through the window at his neighbour Sid hanging with his wife (as obvious foreshadowing for later in the episode but in context of the montage, Dean????).

Dean at the bar drinkin’ with Sid after the montage.

Listen: Dean has exactly 1 experience with Suburbia and neighbours and stuff ever. 

*presses the fast forward button on the remote*

8x08:

> MRS FRELENG   
> Gary and I – we… had an arrangement. He was seeing Olivia, and I was spending some time with our neighbor P.J.
> 
> […]
> 
> DEAN  
> Frigging suburbs, man.
> 
> CASTIEL  
> So she’s not a witch.
> 
> DEAN  
> Just the best wife ever.

DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS 

but I think Dean had a wee little crush on Sid and 8x08 opened his eyes in weird and wonderful ways.

I mean they apparently have a beer together every night?? I know Dean must have started off drowning his sorrows, but now they’re just laughing and he’s starting to open up a little to this random guy, and sure Lisa knows the whole story but she kind of HAD to find out about monsters and then the apocalypse just because she knew monsters were real and Dean collapsed into her life so obviously SOME sort of explanation was due… But Sid? Man, he doesn’t know anything and Dean is splurging to him.

And Sid is splurging back:

> Sid: And thank God this is before Facebook, right? Because it’d be me and that goat all over the Internet. Don’t get me wrong, right? No complaints. But if you’d have said to me, “hey, you – fifteen years from now? Suburbia.”

Season 6 is weird.

I may have to change my season 6 tag because I keep on saying this. Though I think the current one covers it. :P

* * *

[Blah blah Dean freaks the fuck out at a pigeon…](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130158937143/suburban-dad-roleplays-monster-hunter-to-alleviate)

* * *

For the seasonal theme of lying, Dean starts out early lying to Lisa about investigating monsters, never mind concealing the full story (except the emotional plot beats) from Sid.

…

And then ducks behind Sid as an excuse for what he was up to.

> Dean: And no one’s called about a missing person?  
> No, this would have been today.  
> So no reports of anything around Vineland and Oak street, near that hotel renovation?  
> Uh, call it a hunch.  
> I’ve been a cop for a long time.  
> Okay, yeah.  
> No, I’ll call you tomorrow. You too, man. Bye.
> 
> Lisa: Hey. Who was that?
> 
> Dean: Sid. I’m just setting up a poker game.
> 
> Lisa: It’s 11:30.
> 
> Dean: Is it really? Well, that explains why he was asleep when I called. I’ll be right up.

Anyway, Dean x Sid aside it’s interesting that little “been a cop for a long time” thing because he’s equating his cop instinct with his hunter instinct, again blurring the lines between his fake IDs and the job, in an emotional sense… I know he’s always acting, but there’s emotional truth behind the line if you swap out the profession. 

I dunno :P I am intrigued by Dean and personas, so it sneaking through just in that little way this episode amuses me.

* * *

I am absolutely certain that if Dean is not lying on the floor hallucinating the whole time but living in a waking nightmare where 99% of his experience of the real world is just that, then that was Soulless Sam’s car whooshing past him before he has the close encounter with a Yorkie. I forgot to check, but he’s driving a black car this episode. (I think he has a silver car later when Cas crushes it?? I already watched this episode through once and there is a black car that looks something like that.)

* * *

That Yorkie is probably a callback to Yellow Fever, which works well to bring us back to the subject of Dean’s fear that this episode explores (his fear of monsters from Yellow Fever transferred mostly to fear of keeping Ben and Lisa safe FROM monsters, although his panic at the pigeon and over-kill threatening the Yorkie have his own fear of the situation). The giant claw marks compared to the tiny animals (since he’s imagining the claw marks) basically mountain-out-of-a-molehill’s them.

* * *

I like Sid’s running gear:

Suburban Guy Sid listens to 90s grunge while Dean hasn’t moved past 90s metal. :3

* * *

> Dean: I thought that was a possum. Remember when I said I was in pest control? Well, possums carry rabies, so… [ Imitates gunshot ]
> 
> Sid: I did not know that.
> 
> Dean: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Possums – possums kill, Sid.

I like that Sid was concerned enough he immediately went running to Lisa to tell her that Dean was acting strange.

He could not have been very far behind him.

“So I just ran into Sid” she says so casually.

Mr and Mrs Bowlegs :3

I know it’s kind of how she’s standing there, but I think that detail is adorable.

(Her cool brown leather jacket is almost the more Dean-like of the 2 jackets they’re wearing, him in his comfy Suburban Dad gear.)

* * *

LISTEN:

  


HELLO AND GOODBYE, JACKET.

([I was literally just reading about you](http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/130216826406/the-life-of-the-dead-is-placed-in-the-memory-of))

I don’t know if that’s the real thing, intended to be brought back next episode, but tragically lost at sea between now and then, or a replica chunk of sewn and battered leather posing as the jacket, but I have overlooked this detail many times, and it’s the last time we ever see it in canon. 

It’s another Box Of Things We Know About Dean Winchester, in this case a few random files, the jacket, and John’s journal. So similar to the last box but with a heavier overt Old John Stuff theme but also a more practical Job Stuff theme considering there’s some more paperwork and less guns and not the key to the car either. 

I suppose the fact that we’re shown Dean with the jacket in the box at this point means we know he didn’t keep it, but he did get the journal back so I would make a vague guess at a happysad headcanon he left it for Ben to grow into, first intentionally and then as, well, it’s probably in their house somewhere for them to find. 

Anyway the fact the journal was with the jacket means that at some point thanks to the loss of the prop, means off-screen Dean elected to take one but not the other at some point.

* * *

I covered most of the Azazel stuff in the other thing I wrote for this episode but I got to point out the first mention of Cas this season:

> Azazel: Yeah, kiddo. The big daddy brought your pal Cas back, right? So why not me? Add a little spice to all that – that sugar. 

I mean fuck me if Dean’s own subconscious didn’t just call Cas “sugar” :P

Since, you know, this all is dragged out of his own imagination.

And it proves Cas is on his mind, and at the very least Dean’s been thinking about Cas being brought back by God as a good thing, even if they’ve been out of contact while Dean’s been busy raking leaves.

(Oh god I forgot that season 6 is like sticking a fork in your eye over Destiel feels. :P)

* * *

 _SUGAR_.

* * *

(This doesn’t even make sense - sugar and spice are on the same side in that song because they’re “everything nice” although maybe you can use them as opposite ends of a spectrum of good/bad??

Dean your brain is a trainwreck I refuse to engage with it.)

* * *

Anyway hi Sam! Kinda! Awkward one-sided hug where Dean is sad and Sam is :| because he’s the personification of the flat line mouth smilie for the first half of the season. With some of the usual bitchface. :P

We’re back in Sam’s Creepy Abandoned Shack™ but it’s larger and full of Campbells. I am quite amused by the re-use of this set because it seems to be attached to Sam’s poor mental health. Not sure if they honestly re-use the set or just ones with a window like it, but similar abandoned creepy places featured in 3x15 (when Sam was setting Dean up to hunt Doc Benton and was totally angling for it to creepily save Dean with alchemy), 4x09 when he was getting corrupted by Ruby and having his dead-Dean meltdown… 5x20 (?) with Crowley and Brady…

Yeah, Sam vs shacks with that particular broken window with the vines outside seems to be a pretty consistent issue that Dean does not face. :P

* * *

> Sam: I mean, no idea. I-I’m just back.
> 
> Dean: Well, was it God, or – or – or Cas? I mean, does Cas know anything about it?
> 
> Sam: You tell me. I’ve been calling. Cas hasn’t answered my prayers. I don’t even know where he is.

Ahahahahahahahha.

Haaaaa

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Oh no.

“God. Or Cas.”

“Cas.”

*resumes fork-sticking*

But yeah, Dean seems to assume if Sam is up and hunting and he’s been out of the bubble then Cas would have been IN the bubble with Sam. There’s instead 3 separate bubbles: Dean in suburbia, Sam hunting, Cas in Heaven. (I suppose, Crowley in Hell, Bobby being the only one getting any work done around here, idjits.)

Team Free Will all split up releasing their solo albums over the year, anyway.

But it’s interesting that Dean assumes Cas might have been around, assuming already before he even knows Bobby was in on it that Cas might have been associated with Sam just for the in/out separation and Cas presumably “in”. (And funny that Sam says “you tell me” like he thinks even when Dean is chilling in Suburbia he’d be hanging with Cas.)

* * *

> Gwen: Hey.
> 
> Dean: Hi.
> 
> Gwen: My God, you have delicate features for a hunter.
> 
> Dean: Excuse me?

I always figured Gwen got enough shit for being a female hunter and with such lovely family members that this is almost just as much projecting from her at him as he normally does to others. Not that we have really seen much actual misogyny among hunters (Dean was over-protective of Jo in that season 2 episode like 99% because she was too young and never hunted before in her life - I’d think the way she owned him on their first meeting he’d still not say she wasn’t tough enough :P)

Anyway these guys are like the epitome of that joke from the Simpsons with the bullies being like “you kissed a girl? gaaaaay” when they get to Dean n Lisa’s house, demeaning and feminizing him for being a softie civilian who lives remotely within touching distance of women’s magazines and stuff.

So like, I feel for Gwen.

* * *

> Dean: I thought all of Mom’s relatives were gone. And I’m sorry. It’s just, you know, why didn’t we know about any of you? 

See also: my amusement in 3x02 as I realised  _just how much_  of that one episode Sera used to bounce off for season 6.

* * *

I mean it was memorably awful with the mom dumping her changeling child in the lake… I can see why it would linger.

* * *

Samuel and Dean re-meet and Dean remembers their awful first encounter. Samuel is willing to hug him and seems quite sentimental and Dean’s just shocked (it’s noteworthy to compare the Samuel and Sam hugs just for the emotion going into it. Cuz, you know, Sam. I guess that might be part of why he seems so happy to see Dean.)

We never get a line on if Samuel remembers 4x03 so far as I recall, but their antagonism started there. I sort of feel like since it sparked as a personality mismatch/Samuel being a grumpy old bastard, they were sort of doomed to antagonism this time around too. :P

* * *

> Sam: Samuel had a cure.
> 
> Dean: You got a cure for djinn poison?
> 
> Samuel: Oh, I know a few things. Stick around, I’ll show you tricks your daddy never even dreamed of.

Hahah the infamous Campbell cures for… literally 2 plot important monsters here and then nothing because that’s too easy. But handy because vampires are their bread and butter, but also handy that it’s a ~morality test~ so that if a vampire is worth curing they earned it by being a hapless victim/strong enough to resist (I wonder if Sera thought back to writing that season 3 episode where Gordon died and in the open Sam n Dean killed a freshly turned victim) and if they aren’t able to be cured they failed the test and are valid to kill.

(You know, until it gets awkward with Dean going around making friends with them but that’s for the next era of the show to worry about)

*idly thinking about the no cure for werewolves thing in 10x04 as well*

I wonder what Samuel’d have had to say about that.

* * *

Bobby is pretty cheerful to see Dean again. He sends Lisa and Ben upstairs, which is the first mention of “upstairs” in Bobby’s perpetually boarded up, half-empty house since his mention that Karen was upstairs when she was a zombie. Also I guess he said he walked up and down stairs all night in 5x21. I guess he’s had a year of decent mobility to clean up the upstairs, if Karen hadn’t taken off some dust sheets and pulled the boards off a window somewhere on a side the camera didn’t catch in the zombie episode… *gives self a headache headcanoning things no one else cares about regarding Bobby’s house*

* * *

The “How long!?” confrontation has a similar feel to the confrontation in 6x20 tbh - not the personal stuff between Dean n Cas, obviously, but finding out Sam and Bobby conspired to not tell Dean anything and kept him in the dark and Bobby was aware too for the whole year leads to a very betrayed moment where Dean has to vent about how awful it was.

I sort of feel like Sam went through these steps:

Sam, in 5x22, telling Dean to go be with Lisa, knowing emotionally it is where he had to be if Sam were dead.

Soulless Sam seeing Dean there, going to his memory for reference on what this was, and finding a sort of note to self that it was important Dean stay there. Not getting why exactly, but knowing that. 

Going to Bobby and stressing Dean stay with Lisa just because he knew that’s sort of what he would say anyway, without considering the emotional side of it. Like Dean wanting to know Sam was alive. 

Bobby, who gives Sam some very interesting looks when he comes through the door, goes along because, well, he should trust Sam to tell him about what’s best for Dean and vice versa because it’s Sam n Dean??? 

He seems mistrustful of the situation from the start and with pre-existing doubts about Sam but he doesn’t voice them and takes Sam’s side, because of course he has his own  _emotional_  reasons to be happy that Dean was out of the life and maybe not happy that meant being cut off (hey, Dean could have phoned him up for a chat too, just about, you know, the weather, or their soap operas…)

(wait I think Dean and Bobby watching soap operas together is a season 7 development, possibly aided by the Truth Spell moment where Dean maybe gets the idea he and Bobby aren’t so different in, like, different ways. :P)

* * *

Anyway, having a confrontation about everyone lying to Dean in episode one of the season is a great start considering the entire season basically from this point on is everyone lying or omitting information.

* * *

… Except Bobby after this? I think it’s cute in the Truth Spell moment but actually Bobby doesn’t have any life shattering plot revelations for Dean. And he keeps it that way.

* * *

[skips a chunk because I wrote about Dean n Lisa already]

[screeches to a halt because I forgot to screencap the Fresh Fruit of Doom]

Also like how that’s Dean’s shadow to Samuel’s left.

What do you bet that Dean wore the floral apron in the kitchen? Tell me he didn’t try it on at least once, I dare you.

…

I literally just skipped back to the opening montage to check he wasn’t wearing it in the cooking breakfast scene but no such luck.

* * *

> Dean: Oh, yeah. Go ahead, say it – call me a soccer mom. Whatever.
> 
> Samuel: “Soccer mom,” huh? Well, I’ll have to look that up on the “intranet.” You know, believe it or not, I…I get it, Dean. You wanted a normal life. Your mom wanted a normal life, too. You remind me of her, actually. The attitude, for one thing. 

Samuel and Dean  _aaaalmost_  seem to get along for a moment. Aw. :P

Also, crippling pain from him comparing Dean to Mary.

I think Dean’s constant comparisons to Mary are interesting because I feel like it’s actually this which ended up making Samuel take  _against_  Dean later this season because he can see Mary in him, which makes Samuel’s relationship with him that much harder to have Dean opposing him, because to Samuel that’s like a reflection of Mary telling him that he’s wrong.

Samuel meeting Dean in these circumstances where Dean’s normality is being preserved and he’s running away from “the life” in exactly the way Mary wanted (and got after Samuel died and I assume he knows about from Sam who wouldn’t exactly spare his feelings on telling him Mary’s life story) probably doesn’t help with the low-key resentment that they all have for Dean:

> Samuel: You tell me. All we really know is it’s all hands on deck. We’re counting on each other right now. That’s how it is with Campbells. We need you, Dean.
> 
> Dean: Look, I hear you, but…
> 
> Samuel: You don’t know what you’re part of, Dean. You know, you had ancestors hacking the heads off vamps on the Mayflower. What I’m saying is that we’re your blood. And we’re out there dying, trying to get in front of whatever this is. Maybe not the best time for golf.

He can’t win… they didn’t drag him in but they’re going to judge him for wanting out and for it being some precious state that they couldn’t violate per the rules of this conspiracy to keep Dean out.

It’s probably this original conspiracy that keeps Samuel from revealing anything more to Dean later as well. Sam wasn’t in the loop either, but they have been enjoying probably how he’s more of a sharp tool for them to use, enough to respect the terms about leaving Dean out. 

(I do wonder what if anything Crowley said about Dean though. If nothing else, if he and Samuel talked to set up their business arrangements and presumably Crowley set him up with Sam, they tend to come as “the Winchesters” so I can’t see them getting through a whole conversation without Crowley revealing he’s on first name basis with 2 of them. :P)

* * *

Anyway Samuel does his “it’s family legacy” speech that makes Dean inheriting the family business from John seem weaksauce, because the whole season is amping random things like this up.

* * *

*Sam and Dean have a very weird conversation*

Dean calls Samuel “grandpa” which seems really weird and wrong. And he’s not even joking or emphasising it for ridiculousness. I don’t know if he’d really go for the title right away just because he barely knows the guy, but maybe he’s trying it out for size.

Meanwhile Sam says he’s been enjoying hunting with his family, which is kind of alarming. I would guess he’s understood the idea that hunting with family is a Thing That He Does but not really considered the difference between random cousins and Dean or even, historically, John. I mean there’s nothing wrong with it in theory, but he’s presumably not making emotional connections with them so it’s an interesting example of early signs he was going along with a template version of Sam’s emotional motivations? 

I dunno.

I gather they did know all along he had no soul, even if I find his behaviour suspiciously inconsistent until they announce it, and  _then_ I guess once it’s known Sam is like “lol well now we know I have no soul I’m not even gonna try” so allowing them to write more obviously soulless Sam, which just makes all these weird moments where Sam is apparently trying to Be Like Sam in these early episodes of the season kinda weird and annoying for picking out consistency.

Like, I think he smiled at the photo of Lisa and Dean. What was that??!

* * *

Anyway Sid is dead and Dean is distraught. (And 33 minutes into the episode we get  _any_  explanation of why they made sure we know Dean liked peeping through the window at his neighbours. :P)

*Dean calmly checks on the wife and then spots Sid and his voice breaks and he’s like Siiiid as he hurries to see if he’s alive*

* * *

No more barbecues with Sid. :<

* * *

(Hey Cas gets mentioned twice and I wrote a ton about Dean and Lisa and vented all my feelings elsewhere. I have to entertain myself somehow and Sid and Dean interact a ton. :P)

* * *

Sam tries to recruit Dean because this makes a lot more sense to him.

Sam is… Well, he’s like “yeah okay” … So much great eyebrow shrugging from Soulless Sam. I forgot how that was a highlight of the first half of the season. :D

But he thinks Dean’s empathy is useful. Often wondered how much he manipulated Dean a little here because he decided he’d be useful and the Sam and Dean partnership was historically successful so like, why not optimise their skillz by teaming up? Sam just wants to be the best hunter because it’s what he does, and he can be better with Dean, so.

[Dean is irrationally emotional about looking after Lisa and Ben and staying in suburbia because unlike SOMEONE he still has a soul]

If you didn’t guess something was up with Sam, him rejecting Baby is alarming. He should have been so happy Dean was going to let him make off with her and… probably put another ipod dock in her. That was tacit permission to put an ipod dock in her, Sam.

Oh, you don’t even care. :P

… 

*season 6 rewatch turns entirely into making fun of Sam while he’s helpless*


	2. 6x02

Or: it’s been one episode and Soulless Sam is already stealing babies.

* * *

Okay so technically it’s this alpha shapeshifter stealing babies and Sam just borrowed this one.

I’ve always wondered why the shapeshifter bothered with the bloody murders of the family. He could have just waited until the husband was out, posed as him as per the whole creepy gross knocking up phase of this, and just say he was taking the kid on a walk in the park and never come back.

¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 

* * *

Wasn’t there a 6 month birthday thing going on here as well, to mirror the whole Azazel thing?

I remember especially early season 6 feeling a lot like it was borrowing from the early stuff for a sort of reboot but not. “This thing but with monsters.”

* * *

The Impala continues to exist as a thing mostly covered in a heavy cloth except for the trunk.

Dean is dressing kind of half suburban half hunter - he never wears T-shirts with stuff on normally, but over the top he has one of his typical grey shirts, rather than wearing his suburbia tucked-into-pants buttoned shirt of last episode. Sort of, putting on an outer layer of being a hunter while getting more paranoid and having the need to think about it again…

And Baby steadily getting more uncovered than last episode where he practically opened her trunk with the cloth still over it while sneaking around. :P

* * *

Oh hey, this is a Glass episode. Guess he was a season 6 newbie writer?

I somehow managed to never get an opinion of Glass except that he writes okay episodes. This is… an okay episode. 

* * *

I like the Dean and Lisa stuff in this episode anyway. :P 

* * *

Meanwhile Sam has to be informed in a slow voice that Baby Stew Is Bad.

I know this is the start of the season but it still bugs me that Samuel seems to be just twigging something’s up with Sam along with us. 

Season 6′s problem is it’s a ‘you have to watch twice’ story - you get so many plot twists thrown at you throughout, right to the end, that a re-watch is the only way to really piece it together, or else you’re working on vague memories and what they deign to show you in pre-episode recaps. To actually understand the story properly instead of just knowing enough to keep watching, you have to re-watch to look at how it was put together. And then with a rewatch you have a ton of hindsight but at the same time you’re recognising foreshadowing that only genuinely means anything to you once the reveal comes, and not all of it was written knowing exactly what was going to happen later. So some of it is handled okay (Cas in general at least is just kind of 1 note for much of the early stuff, popping in to be grumpy and time-stretched in his war, but that’s fine because it’s a note which once they’re building up to the actual reveal still makes sense… The details of Cas working with Crowley… seem a little more murky. I remember there’s something or other in Caged Heat which bugs me in a way outside of ‘they’re just acting like they’re not working together’…) but something like Samuel here acting like Sam’s behaviour is vaguely unsettling to him as if that’s  _strange_  seems off once you watch that spider episode and it’s like, okay, Soulless Sam was completely off the wall in that episode at times, and Samuel is expecting him to care about babies here? At the very least he should have learned not to push Sam for an empathy response or expect Sam to be very sympathetic. :P

I dunno, the fine print bothers me mostly because plot as you go or at least, come up with the fine print as you go, does not work for multiple twists which force introspection on earlier canon. >.> 

Like, it’s much more forgiveable that the special children storyline doesn’t mesh so well with the apocalypse, because the various contradictions are usually 2-3 seasons adrift from each other, and even in marathons you tend to at least barrel through it without stopping to really look back, when you’re watching for the first time. Despite coming off the old canon it doesn’t twist it so dramatically you’re forced to go re-evaluate it then and there to really even understand what’s going on.

(I mean my first catch up marathon was to the end of season 6 - specifically with 6x20 being the last episode that had aired - but I can’t be the only one who immediately re-watched the season as soon as they were done with it the first time. :P)

Anyway, I have my various complaints with season 6 and I pre-emptively know I don’t have too much to say about this episode so I’m getting this one out there so I can carry on watching for fun. :P

* * *

Oooh. 

> DEAN   
> Listen to me. Don’t ever open this trunk. Do you understand me? 

I just equated the trunk to Teh Hunter Life which is obvious enough. This moment feels like foreshadowing for the tragic bit at the end of the season where Dean does hand Ben a shotgun and, worries from this episode aside, really  _does_  sort of turn into his father to them… (This theme gets more and more unsubtle the longer I think about it, especially with all the parallels last episode getting ready for this one. >.>) Anyway I think Ben nosing around in Baby out of curiosity is just [another one of those things where the bubble bursts for Dean](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130232794973/i-think-id-like-to-take-you-up-on-that-beer): it’s not just about keeping them safe but also keeping them separate, even if it means treating them like fragile civilians rather than training them up, to Dean’s ever-increasing stress levels where he takes on a stupid amount of burden to protect them.

And Ben willingly nosing around in the Impala out of curiosity/even admiration for what Dean does is an intrusion between the safe world and Dean’s dangerous world he can’t control.

(thinking of Ben admiring Dean, of course you have kid Dean from the Christmas episode saying that he has the coolest dad in the world blah blah… Ben even looks a little like the actor who played Dean in that episode.)

* * *

> BEN   
> Okay, sorry. But I don’t get it. You had your own rifle when you were my age. 

I feel like this was a trap Dean walked into - if he ever said anything about his past, as he often does he’d romanticise it even a little, so describing how he grew up, especially with Ben around, he’d try not to make it sound so horrible and so of course that grows in Ben’s mind as Dean being the exact same superhero Dean used to think John was… Argh, this cycle.

* * *

*Dean angrily covering up his feeling or trying to bury his hunter side or something idk*

It’s symbolic anyhow :P

Plus, more sheets between him and being a hunter.

* * *

*Sam randomly eating a pre-packaged sandwich* those things… have no soul. Compared to home-made sammiches.

I dunno, it’s a reach. I lived off pre-packaged sandwiches in uni. I am allowed opinions on their soullessness.

* * *

*Dean continues unloading boxes which all look very domestic instead of his black wooden box which was way more stylish and hunter-y.*

* * *

> DEAN   
> I’m out. I’m staying out. 

Says Dean while salting the windows as if to ward off Sam. Who threatens to come anyway, and then tells Dean he stole a baby. 

Always funny that Sam’s doing great on his own until he ends up with responsibility over a tiny human. THE GREATEST HORROR.

* * *

Immediately after trying to protect his civvie family by yelling at Ben he’ll never hold a gun, Dean has to tell Lisa how to use a gun. (No “strong female character my brother/dad showed me how to do this” for once to emphasise Lisa’s civilian status.)

~symbolism~

(Since he equates LisaandBen as a unit SO OFTEN teaching her to shoot a gun it might be nearly as bad as Ben tbh in terms of Dean Brain Stuff maybe? Anyway it defers it one rung up the ladder from him being so upset about Ben never learning to shoot.)

* * *

Dean is still driving the Dad Truck like he did to meet Sam but he was wearing his Dad Jacket then and meets up with Sam to hop in his car and is now wearing his generic hunter-y jacket and clothes, looking like he could be from any episode. *Dean slowly shedding his suburbia identity*

… Sam’s car beeping about the seatbelts makes me laugh. Since Sam is just his meatsuit powered by the bitchface right now, he  _would_  be cautious about his own skin since that’s all he has. :P (see also: that pull ups scene. I mean you don’t hAVE to but I hear it’s well-viewed :P) I mean I know it’s the car asking, not Sam, but it’s funny to equate his car to him as Baby is to Dean, because he has this soulless modern car.

* * *

Lol shopping trip.

Sam seems to mostly find it hilarious that Dean has become dad-ish… At least on first watch I always thought Sam was maybe expressing fondness here as he might any time he has a soul, but… Eh. I guess he’s not meant to be and is just generally amused. Expectations of Sam vs what’s actually going on - see also: season needs rewatching.

(And: Lizzy rarely cares to actually analyse what she’s looking at here, therefore discovering all sorts of vague prejudices and misinterpretations living in her head :P)

* * *

The Bobby-John thing is interesting just because Dean goes on instinct for the name of a family-don’t-end-in-blood father, and Sam mechanically goes for we-name-babies-after-family-it’s-tradition father… Of course without knowing what’s up with Sam at this point it poses a question of their loyalties or understanding of family or what is owed in this sort of legacy naming thing, and I’m not sure (see above) how much first impression vs actually knowing what’s going on is worth when analysing moments like this. Do you go for the first watch surface view where, whatever’s wrong with Sam, you can take him going for “John” as something indicative of Sam’s personality? Or do you come back to it knowing he has no soul and just guess either Sam would have done it anyway but Soulless!Sam is just winging it or if it represents unthinking loyalty? After all, Sam working with the Campbells on unthinking loyalty because working with family is what they “do” becomes a plot point and is stressed several times in the first couple of episodes, when Dean finally starts trying to actually manage the situation and finally points out that the Campbells are shady as hell to Sam.

* * *

Dean imitating the baby crying is probably the best part of this episode if we have to watch it.

* * *

Dean spotting that it’s a shapeshifter in the store camera is another good moment of Dean being waaay more perceptive than everyone else. Considering this is the first episode for Glass obviously he has to have boned up on how to write the characters, so either someone told him to make sure Dean was a smartypants or he studied the show carefully enough to figure it out, but either way it nicely goes with Hammer of the Gods where Dean figured it out I think a whole commercial break before Sam. :P In this case he also has to nudge Sam to see what he already spotted, while casually using his environment to a tactical advantage despite apparently freaking out about how to deal with a screaming baby.

I just like that apparently it’s v important for new writers to know how smart Dean is :P 

* * *

It’s probably a good advantage for shapeshifters to drop their skin when they’re grabbed as it happens almost every time they’re in a fight, much like lizards losing tails (I don’t think it’s a good thing to be so squishy that normal interaction with them could make chunks of them fall off?? I would hope it’s a defence mechanism) but it does tend to force them to change again very soon after… 

* * *

Honestly, regarding me being perpetually confused about what’s up with Sam, fuck this smile:

I mean he probably is just laughing AT Dean or something because he just said this to the baby:

> DEAN  
> Okay, alright, you know what? I’ll pay you money if you sit still. 

I don’t trust Soulless!Sam. Dean’s not even looking his way. 

(I am pretty sure they knew Sam was soulless from the start, in the rare case of actually suggesting they knew where season 6 was going, but there are so many blurry moments before we know. :P)

* * *

Oh no Dean is drinking again. Him sitting on the end of the bed to drink out of the tall glass (I suppose because he’s just using motel glasses?) is weirdly reminiscent of 6x06 and that scene with Cas. In this case Dean pours his own drink.

Anyway the obvious link is angst about Lisa here because he’s being a dense potato about Sam again. In a way Swap Meat becomes an important foreshadowing episode for how it takes Dean like, multiple episodes to pick up that Sam is  _really_  wigging him out.

In this case though I mean Sam is saying some pretty plausible Sam stuff in terms of knowing their shared history, if brutally honest:

> DEAN  
> Yeah, I mean Ben. I mean, I know he’s not my kid, but I don’t know, I’m starting to feel like yeah, he is. Then I think about the way we grew up, I don’t know, I kind of feel like I have a chance to do something different with Ben, you know?   
>   
> SAM  
> You sure about that?   
>   
> DEAN  
> What do you mean?   
>   
> SAM  
> Look, you clearly care about the kid.   
>   
> DEAN  
> But?   
>   
> SAM  
> But moving them around? Keeping them on lockdown? I mean, you do have them on lockdown, right? How is any of that different from how we were raised?   
>   
> DEAN  
> So you’re saying… I’m not shoving anybody into this life, okay? This is temporary.   
>   
> SAM  
> Dad always said it was temporary, Dean. He said it for 22 years. Look, I get it. You want to watch out for them. That’s great. I’m just asking, how do you do that and not turn into Dad? 

As with last episode with the djinn and a lot of superficial elements between 2x20 and that episode, this episode bringing up shapeshifters again, although they’ve featured since, does have this weird parallel within the text NOT to do with the monsters (just as Dean n Lisa weren’t ACTUALLY a djinn dream just paralleled to one) where in Skin, Sam deduced  _pretty quickly_  that Dean was not Dean, but also used a specific recollection of their history to test it first. And here Dean does the literal opposite with Sam - Sam talks unprompted about their childhood so there’s no reason to suspect anything’s up with him, right?

And like with Skin, inverted again, we had the shapeshifter doing the first example of a Dean mirror (literally :P) telling us some of the stuff inside his head Dean wouldn’t share, specifically about what he had to give up for the sake of their life because of John. Now we have Sam telling Dean, with no filter to stop him considering that this is emotionally mauling to hear, that Dean is turning into John, with a thematically similar slant in terms of control and Lisa and Ben giving up their lives (she complains she’ll have to eventually go back to work and Ben to school) to go into lockdown.

(And of course while we’re comparing to Skin, in one of the good moments of adding new lore, this makes perfect sense with the shapeshifter’s tragic backstory of not fitting in etc because if he was seeded like this, but  _not_  collected, for whatever reason (I feel like the alpha was collecting them specifically because of main plot reasons - the big plan has been going all year so that’s 6 months for the alpha to get his act together and realise something was up and start trying to breed a new generation), and perhaps leaving them to integrate in society is one thing, OR the other generations of shapeshifters simply mimic this pattern, then this is a good explanation that actually is quite emotionally resonant with that season 1 episode instead of undermining it with changes to the lore. The shapeshifter using their faces to collect the baby along with their attempts to parent it is another layer to this, I guess, to emphasise how Dean’s moved to the next generation and now having fatherhood issues in his day to day life.)

(this episode is not subtle about that much :P)

* * *

I’m sure there’s nothing symbolic about Dean wandering over to look at the baby while holding his drink and then trying to shush it by letting it taste the whiskey. :P

* * *

(Yeah yeah John wouldn’t have given him alcohol as a kid most likely and definitely not as a baby, but with the stress of the apocalypse gone and this being a season of personal arcs, it’s getting more and more obvious that Dean’s self-medicating since Hell is now turning into his proper descent into alcoholism of this now just being his coping method to emotional trauma (aw how nostalgic for season 1 - Skin had Dean chugging coffee :P) so he’s kind of inherited this from… well, Bobby and John, if we’re looking at the baby’s name and watching Dean give it alcohol. Get some father figures who are healthier, Dean. :P)

* * *

I feel like there’s an awful lot going on here and I’m not sure what because I’m crippled by unintentional foreshadowing of season 7 with that jumpsuit. :P

But yeah, lots of red vs blue (the conflict colours) with one colour either side of the screen, including 2 old cars, superficially similar to Baby, either side of the screen. The guy being a mechanic as well, for another thing. 

There’s the curtain which is drawn back beside them as well - last episode had a ton of hanging sheets obstructing Dean’s movement that he had to push through, so to follow up that symbolism, it’s showing these obstructions aren’t here any more. Baby’s currently covered with a sheet, but here we have the sheet drawn back and the cars out in the open - by the end of the episode Baby is uncovered again as well and Dean’s transitioned back into the world of hunting (to meet CAS again YAY. His hunting husband in opposition to his civilian year off - important that Lisa fits between these stark bookends of Cas interaction and Dean being in or out of the life…)

(To drag in season 7, well, “Jimmy’s body repair” just inescapably is Cas being put back together after he dies, which is obviously something that they can  _not_  have foreshadowed since they planned to kill him off for good and also by some accounts didn’t even know Cas was going to be the main antagonist by the end of the season at this point, let alone everything else :P I suppose it could be a reminder he is coming back next episode.

Also the guy in the jumpsuit, talking about his unfaithful spouse, which, um. I am literally looking at 7x01 Dean here, that’s all I see. I suppose that episode could borrow backwards from this but that doesn’t really seem important enough so I’m just gonna file this under #the universe ships it, or unintentional narrative parallels.)

But of course even without jumping ahead, mechanics are a Dean (or John I guess - they’re blurring over these 2 episodes) parallel and if we take the Jimmy mention as a reminder of Cas being put back together at the end of Swan Song we have this guy talking about his unfaithful spouse again… And of course he only thinks so while she thought she was doing the right thing - i.e. she slept with the shapeshifter because she didn’t realise there was anything wrong with it. It can be a shaky parallel to Cas’s allegiances this season, and how when he comes back it will be to this estranged spouse situation with Dean.

If any of these things were planned at this point. :P As with season 7 hindsight, hindsight from 6x20 is screwing me up about what we should know now and what the WRITERS knew now.

Ugh there is a reason my tag is “we don’t talk about season 6″ and that is because this season is a headache.

* * *

Also while we’re on the John side of the parallel, of course there’s the 6 month birthday thing with the babies and the alpha shapeshifter is a pretty direct parallel to Azazel in this case, and so this makes this guy John and his wife Mary, except a totally innocent victim, her part in it just being duped… Slight adjustment to how we’re supposed to be viewing her, clear of the apocalypse, re-calibrating that blame? Said blame lived in the subtext since 1x09 so although the show has always been very kind to Mary it’s given her this complex backstory and motivations as they developed her character - not sure how I feel about this parallel really stressing the innocent victim side for the mother. 

* * *

Heh, I was going to mention the magic fingers in the background last motel scene, and then didn’t and wow look we cut back to Dean and he’s lying around making use of them and looking sad and sleepy.

Guess they only use that prop when they’re actually making a point about them.

So yeah Dean is indulging in that depressing comfort linked directly to I dunno a sort of replacement for affection or something in the times it’s come up before. He’s away from Lisa and back to the patterns of being alone that were written into the language about Dean in the show from very early seasons.

I’m also noticing just how blue he is dressed, lying on the blue bed with the blue picture behind him. I’m guessing in the conflict colours that’s him - Sam’s been wearing neutral grey and black all episode, so far as I can remember. Red tie though. Hm. Conflict colours subtly being applied to Sam because we haven’t actually had the conflict kick off yet.

* * *

Anyway Dean is the worst babysitter ever because Bobby John just exploded.

I mean how many babysitters are  _that_  bad. 

* * *

Ooh that wasn’t the alpha that was just a random shapeshifter doing the collecting. Organisation! Sinister collaboration between monsters!

* * *

> SAM  
> I’ve never seen a baby monster before.   
>   
> DEAN  
> Of course it’s not really a monster. I mean, it’s still just a baby. It’s not its fault its dad’s a shifter.   
>   
> SAM  
> Right, but it’s a shifter, too. 

Deeeeeeeeeeeean. :D 

I SUSPECT he may have just been set up to contrast soulless!Sam with the emphasis there, but however you look at it that’s forcing Dean to take the sympathetic to monsters position. Which he works towards sometimes and usually in moments of greater mental peace, but could also go with the narrative of him being soft this season - especially since not long after we cut to Gwen Campbell smirking at him for standing around holding Bobby John who is now sleepy and peaceful and cute once he’s over the shock of transforming.

It’s interesting to contrast this to season 4 just because Sam then was actively being made to feel like Dean was weaker because of Hell, etc… Obviously it was the demon blood then and he’s soulless now, and it’s sort of emotional softness in the literal sense that they think Dean’s gone soft, not that he lacks emotional strength/actual physical power in the way that season 4 Sam felt. Like, another round of something being up with Sam and Dean at the same time in this same pattern… 

* * *

Hey the Campbell place has the same caged lights I was obsessed with over the last couple of seasons. (Also makes it a dark parallel to the role Bobby’s house plays in the narrative - he’s got all the similarities including the lights, but his yard isn’t a compound, and his home is just a cluttered library, not this military base, however they actually USE it.)

* * *

> CHRISTIAN  
> Well I’m curious. Who exactly do you think we are?   
>   
> DEAN  
> Hunters.   
>   
> CHRISTIAN  
> Funny, here I’ve been thinking we’re family. 

There’s an interesting LACK of identification there for Dean: he’s not in the family circle (and now we’re really getting the conflict where in the end Gwen is the only one he’ll ever actually remotely like - which she hasn’t earned yet - and so he really never DOES end up going with them as family) and right now he’s still teetering on the edge of being a hunter again, and so when he accuses them, he’s kind of in suburban dad mode still - his capability with the baby equated to experience with Lisa’s relatives, and general softening into a family man looking after Ben - and so he’s judging them from an outside perspective, just like last episode they came into his house and judged him as outsiders to the whole suburbia thing.

* * *

*Sam casually betraying the deep dark horrors of Dean in Hell to these random guys off-screen while Dean was in suburbia* For all we know he casually shared the entire apocalypse story with them with the same brutal honesty he says everything. Anyway, Dean doesn’t look very pleased about this being spilled without his say so, and it creates another rift where he’s being judged from every direction, for being too much of one thing, too little of another. He has some real issues with the Campbells and their expectations for him, since last episode there were similar double standards. What is family for, eh?

(Also amusing because when Samuel meets Cas he accuses him of being scrawny, so if he had foreknowledge of him from Sam, that’s the exact opposite of Cas’s problem when Dean goes around describing him like he’s a five foot tall lil nerd :P)

* * *

I like how the alpha shapeshifter just immediately shows up in Samuel’s face, making the link between them quite clear. It suggests with no better knowledge that it might have just been watching them in the last few minutes and picked their leader to take the face of for shock value, but with hindsight the alphas have their vendetta against this monster capture team, and this baby situation is basically excellent bait to Samuel… the shapeshifter could have known of him full well. Samuel probs knew full well in return the shifter would come there…

It’s a silent communication, anyway.

* * *

Also sending Dean - their softie weak link - away with the baby also very conveniently removes him from seeing them trying to capture the alpha, so that’s already 2 episodes in a row there have been excuses to have Sam and Dean in separate locations while the Campbells try to catch a monster - that’s enough of a pattern to make you suspicious for now since this is so out of the norm for hunters. 

(Normally the “will this baby become a monster raised by us” question could have easily taken up a large chunk of the episode, and be used to explore the inherent brutality of hunter culture yadda yadda but eh, they missed that one. :P)

* * *

Oh hey this shapeshifter transforms like the guy in that episode in season 9 that doesn’t technically exist.

(I am willing to suffer the mannequin episode this season but you’re not going to make me re-watch Bloodlines.)

I suppose the swooshy transformation which looks like pure magic is a gift from Eve, and then when the alpha breeds he passes it on as this purely biological trait… We didn’t get any decent explanation of the alphas or much use of them and technically a fair few of them are now dead for certain including this guy… My dorky interest in this is still making me want to know more. If only because of tracing it back to Eve and my interest in her powers/where she fits into all the show’s complicated mythos. 

* * *

Anyway the shifter chooses to be Sam to fight Sam and transforms into Dean to confront him. Probably important thematically or something :P Not like this season doesn’t end with Sam confronting a handful of himselfs. 

And we all know how much Dean beats himself up. Lol.

* * *

Casually strolls out of there with the baby as Dean. That visual has to be important for some reason?

I dunno, it’s getting late.

* * *

Samuel casually explains that there’s tons of lore like he expects them and everyone at home to know about it and expect that alphas are a thing. Okay, cool, if there’s tons of lore I’ll believe you.

…

I know it’s all just exposition when you get down to it but somehow it feels more real to have it delivered by a character who’s just woken up with the pages of a book stuck to their face, on top of a pile of much bigger books.

* * *

Ooh I forgot that Dean went full on detective!Dean at the end… Not just a smart!Dean episode, then. One of the nice ones where he actually does some serious deductive reasoning. (I mean you will never ever beat 9x11 for detective!Dean but this is still nice :P)

> DEAN  
> Well, because if you heard him, then you knew the Alpha was out there.   
>   
> SAM  
> Okay.   
>   
> DEAN  
> And if you knew the Alpha was out there then you knew he might come after the baby. In which case you were using the baby as bait. So was that the plan? To use the baby as bait?   
>   
> SAM  
> Of course not. Dean, I just thought that Samuel’s was the safest place. That’s all. 

“Hahaha who uses a baby as bait? You’d have to be soulless to do that!”

*Sam sweats slightly*

* * *

(I know, he genuinely has no idea about that. It’s still funny.)

* * *

*Crowley off-screen grumbles about not getting his shapeshifters* 

man, everyone is back before Cas. :/ WHere’s Cas??

* * *

Dean changes back into an alarmingly few number of layers to have a nice open conversation with Lisa. :D

> LISA  
> Dean, can I be honest? 

*winces because we’re reeeeally not that far from the honesty day episode*

I mean she basically says the same thing in spirit about now Sam’s around he wants to go… 

Gosh I love Lisa in this scene.

> LISA  
> Okay. Okay, but you also want to be there. I get it. You’re white-knuckling it living like this. Like what you are is some bad, awful thing. But you’re not. But I’m not going to have this discussion every time you leave. And this is just going to keep happening, so I need you to go. 

She’s looking out for him and being supportive, but also looking out for herself: she generally seems to have a drive based on certainty/uncertainty and so coming to an understanding of how things will be from then on - even if it seems like an uncertain arrangement from the outside, she gets what it will be like and can structure her and Ben’s emotional wellbeing around that. If she makes Dean stay, random things will keep tearing him away and fracture them because it will be a source of conflict that it keeps happening as well as his mind not being at ease. If she tells him to go and stay gone it’s severing an emotional relationship she’s already explained how she feels it benefits them as a family unit for Dean to be involved in their lives…

Baaah I’m sad that if nothing else, it ended  _so soon_  after this and he didn’t even get to make it to the midseason balancing this. >.> Even just in the background with her having no extra episodes.

* * *

*Dean layers up with an extra jacket and dramatically uncovers Baby from  _her_  layers*

*obligatory car porn moment*

Great, now go find Cas. :P


	3. 6x03

Probably: Dean staring out of the window sadly; “When will Cas return from war?”

Well I have good news and bad news for you…

* * *

What a delightful recap, with so much BAMF Cas :3

All the most horrific irony for the end of this season with 5x03 recapped extensively and Cas vs Raphael and the little bit with Raphael trapped in the holy fire being used to set up that relationship… I know I expressed sad noises about that when I watched it but I am repeating them here as we head into the storyline for Cas’s downfall. 

Yes my heart is already bleeding for 6x20.

This is pretty much how we’re going to handle this season. That and dreary acceptance of me watching the mannequin episode. :P 

* * *

The next two scenes are: disgusting body horror > Dean n Lisa in bed. *rolls neck to recover from the whiplash* Ow.

I feel after everything I said about them being a dream it’s presumably worth pointing out the fact that as Dean returns to the hunting life - sleeping in the car,  _not_  travelling with Sam yet, but apparently still Out There Doing Stuff - Lisa returns to being a dream. It’s basically already over for them, unfortunately, in terms of any more romantic interactions. So this seems like a book end to that aspect of the relationship with 3x10. The last time we see Dean dreaming about Lisa. The last time it’s a  _possibility_  that this is something that could happen if he turned around and drove back to her, because the vampire episode is getting really close. 

I also can’t remember if I really got into this anywhere in the last couple of rewatches but with the way Dean n Cas sort of “broke up” at the end of season 5 and then Dean went to Lisa, the fading out of this relationship right along with Cas’s return does create the fact that Cas isn’t seen near Dean for the entire time of the relationship, but once Dean has passed  _those_  bookends (i.e. the space between “I’d like to take you up on that beer” through to the conversation at the end of last episode and Dean unveiling Baby again) and is back to being Hunter Dean and Suburbia Dean is retired, Cas is suddenly a presence in his life again. (Never mind in 5x17 Dean giving up and betraying TFW to say Yes is marked by him rushing to Lisa, and that being how they catch up to him in 5x18 - to Cas in particular she’s practically a conflicting interest without extra subtext, while to Sam she was better understood emotionally :P)

S’probably also worth saying something about us seeing Dean’s dreams again before this happens just because Dean n Cas and dreams is such a thing.

(extremely ongoing thing if we included the 10x23 deleted scene.)

* * *

Blah blah Soulless Sam and the prostitute… *side-eyes Edlund for the whole “so good sex she was offering it for free!” thing* (yr fave is problematic but at least I don’t have to say it too often - I think the last time I had to look askance at him was Wishful Thinking… :P) 

The sex here is paralleled subtly I guess with Dean’s sex dream with Lisa for what Sam was doing off-screen before the episode: that was all physical connection, and Dean was just emotionally connecting in a dream. 

* * *

I feel no one talks about this:

I mean. Cas. Dean. Burgers. This is their Couple Thing.

Anyway while Sam is saying farewell to his companion Dean is getting burgers from somewhere that loudly advertises a pro-Destiel agenda. :P

(Something about Gamble Era is just the most takeaway food era to me, Leviathans aside. I feel like this image of Dean with a paper bag of food is very season 6 or 7)

I can’t imagine he gets these burgers and does not think of his little nerdy friend with tiny cute white wings and a halo (Dean srsly why are you this way).

* * *

> DEAN  
> What are you doing in Pennsylvania?
> 
> SAM  
> Caught a case.
> 
> DEAN  
> A case? When? It’s been like a day and a half.
> 
> SAM  
> I like to work.
> 
> DEAN  
> Apparently.
> 
> SAM  
> Glad we hashed that out. Call me when you roll into town.

As Swan Song recently pointed out, they are actually used to serious downtime between cases when working normally (probably to explain how we see just a handful of events in their average year but it’s usually a season per year). There’s other moments where they’re highly stressed and work non-stop and it’s shown as something being wrong with them to roll from one case to the next. Obviously since the Bunker they can have a different sort of down time but I suppose if nothing else Dean heading out from Lisa’s and being surprised they’re immediately getting to work means he expected to spend some time chilling at the Campbell’s headquarters (where he thought Sam was) to catch himself up on the missed year, if not chilling and doing some fun stuff with Sam. So far he really doesn’t seem to know anything detailed about what they’ve been up to - I think Samuel has actually told him more than Sam which is already a worrying sign. :P

I’m laughing at how Sam says “glad we hashed that out” like he really can’t tell what is an important emotional conversation or not at this point, but is hedging his bets that this was an important discussion to have, emotionally, since Dean was bitching about it, so offers this platitude as if they had just had a Moment.

Dean looks bemused at his phone when he hangs up.

* * *

Ugh so many gross deaths in this episode.

Oh man, I forgot the motivation for these deaths was still news-relevant cops killing black kids. >.> 

*adds the amendment that I just really don’t like seeing gross boils erupting all over the guy’s face because it’s disgusting, and not because I’m in any way sympathetic.* >.>

* * *

> DEAN  
> Ben…I know you’re lying. Because I lie professionally, that’s how. Now tell your mom that you broke the damn thing and take it like a man. Okay? 

Little bit of intruding Dad!Dean before he gets to work. :’)

(Which lines up with how Ben is the one to call him a couple of times late in the season)

(the fuckin’ mannequin episode haunts this season whyyy)

But yeah, to go with the Theme Of The Week, more about truth and lies re: Lisa and Ben.

* * *

I do like how easy it is to get through Important Emotional Conversations with Sam right now :P Like, good, we have discussed this, let’s not discuss it any more now, we done?

* * *

He is wearing the blue tie and Dean the red - conflict colours switched around on them from last episode. It bugs me how either of them can be red/blue because they’re not branded with their colour coding in their clothes, it just shows up circumstantially. And the conflict comes from Cas’s issues this episode anyway.

* * *

The next cop always gives me an itchy sort of headache to watch. >.> Geeze, Edlund.

Chill.

* * *

I guess he is racing through all this to get us to Cas.

Cas Cas Cas.

* * *

I guess after that lovely image, it’s time for me to go make dinner. :P *scratches head*

* * *

(I wonder what happened to those locusts after. Also I am RATHER AMUSED at the fact there exists a fan fiction gap where Dean and Soulless Sam had to find a jar and collect these locusts FOR SCIENCE. That must have been hilarious to watch.)

* * *

15 minutes in and finally it’s a Cas problem!

* * *

Hahaha Sam doesn’t have a desktop background on his laptop. Because picking a background requires a soul apparently.

* * *

> DEAN  
> We should call Cas.
> 
> SAM  
> You’re kidding, right? [ Scoffs ] Dean, I tried. It was the first and second and third thing I did, soon as I got topside. Son of a bitch won’t answer the phone.

Dean says it casually like it’s the next logical step, pretty much carrying on from where they left off in season 5 before things got hairy - if something looks like an angel problem, Cas is there to help.

In 6x01 Dean did learn that they’d been out of contact with Cas, but held an assumption before then that Sam etc would have been in contact and this was an extension of him being out of the loop. At that point it wasn’t really pressed, so this reminder comes to point out that all 3 members of TFW were estranged over the last year. And yet Dean still has the natural assumption that now he’s around again, things will just immediately click back into place and Cas will come help them, despite being a year estranged and Sam saying he got nothing.

Dean at least figures it’s worth a try, despite Sam’s scoffing, and does it with a very silly prayer, and it actually  _works_. I dunno, I feel like Dean also thought that it might, enough to make a fool of himself trying (although that gives him room to turn it into a joke if it doesn’t) but lo and behold, Cas pops up.

I know Cas says the thing about Teh Profound Bond™ but I feel like Dean has a semi-awareness of the idea that Cas would come answer his prayer, or that he should try anyway despite Sam’s failure.

* * *

For the ongoing comparison, once again this is Dean sitting on the end of a bed holding a drink - beer this time - and between 6x02, 6x06 and here the link between reaching out to/angsting about Cas and/or Lisa is made. 

I’ma keep track of how often he does this.

* * *

Incidentally, this hotel room is really grotty. Like, the bed looks disgusting :P The headboard is all dirty and discoloured. 

The view out the window has blue skyscrapers, much like how last episode there was a PAINTING of blue skyscrapers on the wall behind the bed.

*wonders about these little links*

* * *

> DEAN  
> Come on, Cas! Don’t be a dick. 

Dean gets a bit more personal… Still isn’t what motivates Cas to come help: it’s the “plague-like situation” that catches his interest, but still, he didn’t HAVE to come say hello right away. 

* * *

*moments into Cas’s reappearance and Dean is hanging his head like  _why do we hang out with this guy_.*

True love is beautiful. :P

* * *

…

I am clearly getting tired and should go to bed because I’ve been sidetracked into giffing which is extremely unproductive for actually watching.

* * *

I like how there’s a whole mistaken 2 minute detour into this whole profound bond vs “why didn’t you answer when I called?!?” thing where we’re strung along on that until Cas is like, “You think I came because  _you_  called?”… With some Sam vs Cas hilarity mixed in. 

Cas eventually gets them back on topic but it’s like two minutes just of trying to work out what the hell they all mean to each other again. There’s the implication, that Cas does nothing to shake at first and actually makes  _worse_ with the profound bond line, that he never showed up to help just because it was Sam asking and not Dean - he takes the time to show that he  _does_  have an emotional bias towards Dean, which to him seems like a really obvious (and annoying to him) character trait, like, do I really have to answer that Dean? We both know there’s more of a connection there after everything we’re been through. 

Meanwhile Dean’s torn between delight at seeing Cas again/getting used to how much ‘oh god help me pls’ their interactions inspire, and defending Sam against this favouritism because if nothing else waiting until episode 3 to reintroduce Cas has made his absence really conspicuous to everyone, and weighs on the characters’ minds as much as the viewers’. (Well Sam may currently just be annoyed that a useful tool they have is not coming to help and explain :P) Sam as per usual with cutting through the bullshit right now just comes out and asks if Cas likes Dean better because he has no tact, and kicks this distraction off. Finally Cas managing to drag things back on topic dismisses that his abnormal care for Dean was anything to do with showing up after all so the whole argument was basically for nothing except for highlighting all these different angles of tension.

As with a ton of this early season 6 stuff I can’t tell how much was set up and how much was just drawn on later (it helps that this is Edlund to Edlund drawing links to certain future episodes, so there’s some form of consistency :P) but this certainly has a few shades of their end of season falling out: Cas’s absence is directly related to the war (which takes him forever to get around to remotely explaining to them) but comes with these personal consequences for the Winchesters - Dean with his hurt feels (aw :P) and Sam with his current plot status of [???] happened to him because [???] until things start to become clearer later, having conflict over Cas not communicating specifically to answer the question of what happened to Sam. Cas evades that one with a “we don’t know” and I honestly can’t be sure if he’s talking about Heaven or it’s a lol comment from Edlund like, we know what’s happened to Sam but we haven’t even got a clear idea who at this point. I’d guess that Crowley (on his own) seemed to be the most likely candidate at this point, just because of his involvement as the villain early on and I still can’t shake the feeling when I watch Caged Heat that they didn’t know Cas was collaborating with him yet, halfway through the season… Cas is bad at directly lying so his obliviousness here feels a shade too genuine, despite how prickly he is. Still, him talking in general about Heaven not knowing does give him some wiggle room to pretend he doesn’t know if we decide to view this season all as one coherent thing*. :P

*as stated last episode this is my biggest problem with this season because even before I knew any behind the scenes comments, I was seeing how the start didn’t match up to the end 100%… You can make it fit but…

Anyway, Cas taking a detour to consider his and Dean’s relationship but ultimately showing up to do plot stuff is pretty much how the season ends, with Cas being like, I really really care what Dean thinks and I am miserable he doesn’t trust me but… this is more important. I’mma do the thing, brb eating purgatory.

* * *

“I think we can rule Moses out as a suspect”… I love how to Cas that basically would be a potential problem.

* * *

> CASTIEL  
> Before the apocalypse, Heaven may have been corrupt, but it was stable. The staff was safely contained. It’s been chaos up there since the war ended. In that confusion, a number of… powerful weapons were… stolen. 

It’s interesting he suggests the “war ended” considering this episode literally shows he’s right in the middle of it, what with being randomly attacked, and Raphael showing up, etc. I suppose he means “the war” as in “the apocalypse” It’s become less of a one off cosmic event and more of a happening that can be contained within a history book, if one were to write such a thing about Heaven. Being in a new war with similar stakes but a different battleground possibly being responsible for the new way Cas thinks of it in context? I mean he was always a soldier but that way of talking about it still feels starkly different than the lens they looked at the apocalypse through while they were in it.

Anyway Cas saying the war ended here gives this false idea that things are over and the chaos is somehow not a war or something. Like he hasn’t already at this point inspired civil war and this episode is crucial for him arming up for it. :P

* * *

Look, chess set!

It appears to be set up ready to go but no one’s made a move yet?

* * *

I always feel so sorry for Aaron Birch, standing there holding the bit of the staff he has like a kid playing with a stick pretending it’s a gun:

I mean,  _aaargh_.

* * *

> AARON  
> Please don’t kill my dad. It was me. I did it.
> 
> DEAN  
> Okay, nobody’s killing anybody. What’s your name?

He thinks the authorities will just kill them :< Ouch.

* * *

I suppose Aaron says that he’s been praying for justice, and that means Balthazar’s been listening out for stray prayers which sound desperate enough to exploit. 

He’s a crossroads demon without a crossroads - considering the number of people who’d do what Aaron did versus the select people who’d find out about crossroads deals and actually call up a demon with intent, Balthazar has a  _much_  bigger potential customer base… It’s probably a good thing demons don’t have that sort of access. :P I can imagine Crowley being jealous and wanting to shut down the competition if they weren’t all later revealed to be in collusion.

(And now I feel like it’s a shame Balthazar and Crowley never crossed paths.)

* * *

> CASTIEL  
> If the angel we seek truly bought this boy’s soul, when a claim is laid on a living soul, it leaves a mark, a brand. 

*waggles eyebrows*

* * *

Heh, Dean suddenly trapped in a room with two people who have no objection to torturing a kid. He looks like he just took one hard knock, and then another immediately after when Cas says this:

> CASTIEL  
> I  _can’t_  care about that, Dean! I don’t have the luxury. 

And despite how testy he’s been so far, this does seem to be the first time Cas makes it clear to Dean that he hasn’t just, like, been on holiday with his phone off.

* * *

Cas does look sad about hurting Aaron though. :(

* * *

If they didn’t get the message before, the random angel attack does it. 

Poor Sam’s car. :3

* * *

> SAM  
> You’re talking civil war.
> 
> CASTIEL  
> Technically, yes.

CAS you literally just said the war was over.

I love the way Cas just casually goes through all their stuff to get what he needs to cast his spell. 

> CASTIEL  
> [ Gets a flask of holy water from SAM’s bag. ] What he’s always wanted – to end the story the way it was written.
> 
> DEAN  
> You mean the Apocalypse, the one that we derailed?
> 
> CASTIEL  
> Yes. That one. Raphael wants to put it back on the rails.

YOU HAVE BEEN IN THIS EPISODE FOR TEN MINUTES NOW. You’d think that would be important to mention first.

(Thanks to all the teleporting it’s pretty much been in real time since Cas showed up. :P)

> DEAN  
> Cas, why didn’t you tell us this?
> 
> CASTIEL  
> I was ashamed. I expected more from my brothers. I’m sorry.

Hmmm. >.>

I feel like that’s 2 truths and a half-truth to explain the two truths. I mean just just the fact he’s not telling them about Crowley (we’re just, like, leaning into the end of the season definitely being present here :P) suggests that he’s ashamed to talk about the deal he’s had to make, long before it becomes a huge plot threat. 

Cas starts off apologising for everything early, but it’s going to take a while for him to actually work his way around to remorse and meaningful apologies. This tides them over for a bit, anyway. Never trust an early apology before anything truly bad happens :P

*heart continues breaking*

* * *

Anyway hi Balthazar. 

Cas knows exactly who he’s about to meet and he gets his sword out before Balthazar greets him, so he’s definitely wary about this meeting, even if Balthazar was an old friend. At worst he’s establishing himself as a 3rd party in the war, I guess - defecting to hang out and live for himself is as rebellious as fighting Raphael, and if Cas says he mourned Balthazar I would assume they were on the same side to start with in this fight, which means Balthazar technically deserted from Cas’s army… So there’s plenty of reason for him to be cautious about a fight.

* * *

> BALTHAZAR  
> Because I  _could!_  What? What? I me– you’re the one who made it possible. The footsteps I’m following – they’re yours. What you did, stopping the big plan, the prize fight? You did more than rebel. You tore up the whole script and burned the pages for all of us. [ Laughs. ] It’s a new era. No rules, no destiny. Just utter and complete freedom. 

Oops. :P

Raises the point of rebellious for the point of it vs rebellious for a better cause. Balthazar gets won over to the whole “better cause” thing by the end, and dies for it… Cas is busy dying for it every season so far. >.>

On the other hand Balthazar is one of the angels who actually figured out free will - “and this is what you do with it” Cas asks, disappointed that Balthazar isn’t using his freedom for good purposes. Balthazar calls that a stick up the arse instead of, like, basic compassion for everyone not dying. Interesting how they define themselves along these different lines while both being free will angels. Or to compare to Anna, who fell for (rather less skeevy) pleasure and freedom, and took the calling to surrender back to being an angel to fight when she had to, or Gabriel who went into hiding in much the same way and got dragged back in, much the same way. Balthazar generally is the worst of them, but I guess a non hero angel for contrast is needed to make them more complex.

And the whole idea that having to fight is just as sapping on someone’s freedom even if they’re doing it for a good cause, as going along with the main plan. Balthazar is making the choice not to fight, and showing Cas the inherent flaw in actually teaching free will, though he’s not really listening to this lesson. :P

* * *

Anyway Raphael is terrifying.

*sad about Cas getting beat up and made to kneel in front of him before Raphael almost stabs him* :(

(While we’re discussing displays of free will or not, that kneeling has to be symbolic of Cas’s struggle)

* * *

Angels really need to learn the tell tale signs of standing in a ring of holy fire. I mean even Crowley and some of the dumber demons generally seem to check under carpets for devil’s traps.

* * *

I mean it’s got to smell or something?

* * *

> BALTHAZAR  
> Castiel, I stood for you in Heaven. Are you gonna let –
> 
> CASTIEL  
> I believe… the hairless ape has the floor.

… you know, before he faked his own death and everything. Cas is totally right to put Dean first. :P

(I do generally like Balthazar but mostly because he’s fun, and not because I approve. :P)

* * *

Aw and Cas is gone again. :<

> DEAN  
> Cas?! Oh, friggin’ angels! Come on! 

Agreed. :P

* * *

… That wendigo mask is the actual most tragic thing. I wonder if it’s in the pile of crap that Dean accidentally collects forever and ever or if he chucks it out in a fit of sadness at some point? I really hope he kept it :<

*Sam just like “accurate”*

* * *

Aha, 3 episodes in and Dean is fiiinally beginning to wonder about Sam. It always takes him a little longer when it’s something up with Sam. :P

> DEAN  
> Yeah, I get that. I just don’t think I’m getting the whole scoop. You went to hell, Sam. And believe me, I know what that does to a guy.
> 
> SAM  
> To you.
> 
> DEAN  
> What?
> 
> SAM  
> You know what it does to  _you._  It – it tortured  _you._  You know? I think it still does. But, Dean… I’m okay.
> 
> DEAN  
> So you’re saying, what, that – that you’re stronger than me?
> 
> SAM  
> No. Just saying we’re different. 

Oops.

“I think it still does.” AAAAAAAH. Soulless Sam srsly needs to learn some filters. I’d guess that’s something that’s been on Sam’s mind for a long time - I remember in season 5 I found a point where I realised Sam had been worrying about Dean for this reason… And it tied back in to him seeing the same thing in season 4 and using it to call Dean weak, or say that he was stronger, while he was affected by the demon blood. So the fact this is coming back to strong vs weak and Dean this time is identifying it that way, off Sam apparently just handling it differently off the same thing that  _originally_  made Sam start labelling Dean as weak?

(Which, incidentally, while we’re sucking up to Edlund still, was made clearest in On the Head of a Pin.)

* * *

*Dean looks grumpily into the distance at the artificially grey-tinted sky* 

*cut to credits* 

Last member of Team Free Will to catch up with next time. :P


	4. 6x04

Or: Bobby is surly. Repeat, Bobby is surly.

* * *

Always making jokes about season 6′s plot but tbh I do kind of like some things, and this episode smooths over a lot of stuff I’d whine about. :P It starts the day after Stull, like, basically as soon as Bobby got home and had waved off Dean to his new life. Depending on how long it took to drive there, I don’t think Dean even made it to Lisa’s yet at this point. :P Sam’s probs still in Hell. Crowley certainly hasn’t approached Cas yet. The narrative for this season is all over the place, but between Bobby being Bobby and the framing of this episode, this feels like solid ground in a way we haven’t had yet (probably because the narrative POV most of the season is Dean being ??? about everything basically with the exception of the Bobby episode, the Cas episode and some Sam being ??? about what he missed), and like a good deal of the season 6 episodes, this one is sneakily a plot episode without telling you how, introducing more elements that add up to the whole, so especially in hindsight it does seem to tell you a lot more about the season than you realised it did.

* * *

My favourite dynamic is Bobby x everyone, apparently. Sad that Cas is MIA so much that we don’t get much right now but we have everyone else. :P First up, Crowley!

> BOBBY: Bite me.
> 
> CROWLEY: If that’s your thing. (snaps fingers to turn off TV and steps toward Bobby) That Swan dive of Sam’s was a thing of beauty. Tens all the way round. Standing ov from the Romanian judge. You should be proud, Bobby. As deaths go, it wasn’t too shabby. Cheer up, mate, we just saved the sodding world together. Me, I’ve been celebrating.

I am amused because quite apart from my “Bobbies are surly” reference as the tagline, got a nice reference to other Dabb stuff with that deleted scene from 9x10 where Cas does the same thing to the TV when he and Crowley are chilling together waiting for Dean. Except he fries the TV and Crowley is kind enough to just turn it off here.

Also laughing at “swan dive” from “swan song”… Also the implication that Crowley was lurking nearby in Stull but not, like, near enough to actually be involved. He wouldn’t risk it. :P

It’s important to remember that Crowley is probably watching literally everything that happens from about season 2 onwards.

* * *

Lol, Bobby calling Crowley “your highness” sarcastically. I mean, I know he’s already King of the Crossroads but the whole… King of Hell thing comes up soon. Has Crowley even had time to stake a claim??

* * *

I often wonder about Crowley’s lack of integrity about giving Bobby back his soul - he’s generally very pro honour an arrangement. On the other hand, he caught Bobby out by the phrasing in the contract - leaving himself any wiggle room to not give it back, and then wiggling through it. Even by the end of this scene, though, I feel there is a sense of fair game about Crowley - he knows Bobby and how resourceful he is (he did, you know, just help avert the apocalypse) and so Bobby with 10 years and an “it isn’t over” Crowley knows this is at least going to be a source of entertainment for up to the next whole decade (since there’s nothing saying  _not_  to wriggle out of it, like with Dean’s deal). I reckon he was willing to give Bobby the chance but only if he fought for it.

Also feel like Crowley generally maintains greater respect for (usually side) characters who do get one over on him - he certainly gives Kevin a few honest warnings and tells him his mom isn’t dead in season 9, after Kevin wins against him in season 8. 

Always felt there’s a respect where respect’s due from Crowley to Bobby after this episode anyway. :P

* * *

*sad feels about The Gambler playing*

* * *

Would Sioux Falls really have a university library? I have no idea. They keep making it sound like a small town.

How does Bobby know it would have that book he wanted? I suppose he’s spent time there before… Probably banned from this break in incident if he wasn’t already. I can imagine his books all pile up and he never gives them back…

* * *

Hey, this demon in his basement has red crossroad demon eyes. I swear most of their random demons have black eyes, but don’t they generally kidnap them from the crossroads? I suppose torturing them for info about Crowley becomes more generic once they know Hell in general is his because then any old demon has a chance of being in the know, so maybe they have other sources…

* * *

I feel in that case like they often know where demon nests are and just never bother to go capture a load of demons unless they need them for something, considering how reliably they can find them to torture later on >.>

* * *

> BOBBY: I want Crowley’s name. (The crossroads demon looks at him and smiles) His real name, back when he was flesh and blood. 

Names are important!

I think the bones thing is v. clever but the whole point about demons is how non-human they are so unless one plagues them as routinely as Crowley, the bones thing is pretty impractical for fighting them. I’m SUPER IMPRESSED Bobby found these for random demon no.2, although perhaps he’s had this demon in his basement for like the whole year doing secondary bone-finding research or something. :P 

Anyway Crowley’s bones made a reappearance in season 10 so vague mental bookmarking of all this… Mind you, I think that was all (?) Bucklemming and they also turned up Gavin from this episode and let him loose into the wilderness with no follow up so I don’t know if I should be waiting for pay off later. 

* * *

Aw Bobby x Marcy. 

He does not seem to be an easy neighbour. I mean there is a  _lot_  of screaming and gunfire from his yard over the years before we get onto anything else. :P I’d guess randomly that the reason she’s only been there 6 months is because one way or another all his past neighbours have buggered off. 

* * *

Hey Rufus. Long time no see! And for Bobby as well I think - they had a little over the phone interaction 4x21/5x02 but I think that’s been it? Now we’re actually seeing how great they are in the same space.

This isn’t even a fandom thing - it’s always been  _my_  impression that Rufus was in a ton of episodes and it feels extremely bare in contrast to actually think about how often he shows up. Aw. :(

I guess he just has a big presence. Or he’s my secret fave I always forget about until he shows up. :P

* * *

Heh, Bobby and Japan - that’s a thing. He says he’s been there and that’s where he’s seen one of these Okami monsters. Did he go with Rufus? Do they have like a whole history of travelling together? 

Rufus has contacts in Scotland after all. :P International monster hunters! I want a young Bobby and Rufus show with an implausibly expensive number of settings.

* * *

*waves at Jody*

You know, the authorities just casually wandering into his front room have a very high chance of taking the time to read all his weird mood boards on the wall - I mean he’s literally talking to the FBI guy framed against a wall covered in news reports which would have to be all random natural disasters and people getting killed in grisly ways to be interesting to Bobby.

I suppose they just think he’s a weird conspiracy kook, but still. It’s not particularly safe. :P

* * *

Lol at Dean being Bobby’s mom on the phone.

* * *

I’m awarding this episode half a point for smart!Dean just for him not being totally bemused and getting on with following Bobby’s instructions instead of asking stupid questions.

* * *

> RUFUS: Oh, okey dokey. Wood chipper, that – that pretty much trumps everything.

* * *

… Is that literally my whole random “Rufus is the best” bias? :P

* * *

No but it helps.

* * *

Depressing exterior shot of Bobby’s house… at NIGHT

I have a weird feeling like it’s the same one from the last time we saw it but edited to be dark?

* * *

Bobby has 3 Chinese takeaway cartons in his fridge. Look after yourself, man.

* * *

Meanwhile: Director Ackles is still working on his best selfie angle. He perfects it by his season 8 episode, which is almost painful to look at. Thankfully 10x03 he was more focussed on being scary. :P

That’s an extremely orange motel. 

<http://justanotheridijiton.tumblr.com/post/130642529329/orange-manifests-its-influence-in-a-different-way>

*shrugs* since Mel’s slowly posting all the colours and that one was tonight, although at a guess even I know that Wisconsin = cheese so it’s probably nothing more sinister than the subtle goofiness of this episode. :P

Anyway, after Dean poses this exact question to Sam last episode, Dean expresses the same thing to Bobby… 

*interrupted by hilarious Rufus moments*

Poor Dean. NOTHING IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN SAM.

Except Rufus eating historical artefacts while being chased by the authorities.

*Bobby has definitely died inside at least 3 times already this episode*

*nay, phonecall*

*meanwhile Dean is too traumatised to eat jellybeans*

THIS IS SERIOUS BOBBY YOU DON’T UNDERSTAAAND

> DEAN: You know you are the one person that I can talk to about this stuff, about Sam – about leaving Lisa and Ben. I mean I don’t –I don’t even know which way is up right now.

I feel sorry for Dean but he’s not saying anything new, although he does express “leaving” Lisa and Ben which makes the separation sound much more serious than the way Lisa sold it in 6x02, which does lend the idea he’s kind of already emotionally cutting himself off from them before it happens… Anyway, he mostly becomes a loving object of ridicule for being sad and angsty, since we’re 100% rooting for Bobby this episode, so his frustration is what we’re sympathising with.

Dean, eat some jelly beans, you’ll feel better.

* * *

*Dean over-steps and invokes the wrath of Bobby*

> BOBBY: I love you like my own. I do. But sometimes – Sometimes… You two are the whiniest, most self-absorbed sons of bitches I ever met! I’m selfish? Me? I do everything for you! Everything! You need some lores scrounged up –You need your asses pulled out of the fire – You need someone to bitch to about each other – You call me and I come through – Every damn time! And what do I get for it? Jack with a side of squat!
> 
> DEAN: Bobby –
> 
> BOBBY: Do I sound like I’m done? Now look. I know you’ve got issues. God knows I know. But I got a news flash for you. You ain’t the center of the universe! Now, it may have slipped your mind …that Crowley owns my soul! And the meter is running! And I will be damned if I’m going to sit around – And – and be damned! So how about you two sack up and help me for once?

*liberates The Rant from all the stage directions on Superwiki’s transcript*

:D

*quietly disagrees with Bobby about Dean not being the literal centre of the universe since that’s my pet crack theory about Dean’s place in the cosmos*

* * *

Bobby also calls in what Jody owes him for looking after the town. Generic or zombies? I suppose she must know about more monsters he’s protected them from since the zombies or assume that since then she found out what Bobby’s real day job was so implied more incidents than the zombies… But yeah, like I said in that rewatch, it does create a bond between them, so mentioning what he does for the town does go back to the whole zombie incident because that’s their shared moment of, well, Jody getting involved in this all… She can’t help but think of it. It’s not  _really_  emotional blackmail, it’s just inevitable shared tragic history. :P

* * *

Hey Gavin. You look different. 

He immediately asks “is this Hell” which I can’t remember if he said something exactly similar in 9x21 but he definitely asked Crowley and Abaddon is they were angels so that’s a half point for continuity. *narrows eyes at Bucklemming*

* * *

> BOBBY: Well, you look like hammered crap.
> 
> CROWLEY: And you’re a vision as always.

Heeey, season 6 Crowley. That’s about our only clue he’s as stressed about the whole thing as Cas? :P I feel thanks to that intro it’s important to make the distinction from the cheerful Crowley at the start of this episode. This one’s deep into the main plot shit now with about as much time for Bobby as Cas had for Dean last episode. :P So after wandering off treating this like a game, now he is just grumpy about being caught out and doesn’t have time for it in the same way.

* * *

> CROWLEY: Don’t we both know how this game ends? Really Bobby, you gotta know when to fold ‘em. 

*glances back up at The Gambler playing at the start of the episode*

* * *

Honestly the best part of this episode is Bobby and Crowley impersonating each other either end of the episode. 

* * *

> CROWLEY: (points at Bobby and speaks in mock voice) But I’m surly and I got a beard. Gimme! 

Ahahaha okay apparently all references to Bobby being surly make me cry with laughter in the same way 10x17 got me. 

* * *

*headaches about 9x21* 

I have a complex theory that involves an AU accidentally created when Abaddon grabbed Gavin which basically makes all Bucklemming episodes a parallel timeline that we occasionally glimpse. E.g. Bobby uses Gavin to get his soul back from Crowley here: Abaddon steals Gavin from his time and Bobby can’t do that because he didn’t die in the same way, so in Taxi Driver his soul is in Hell and that’s how Crowley got it.

It gives me some hope that 10x21 is part of that AU somehow, and Charlie’s fine in the main timeline. I haven’t worked up a coherent theory yet. :P

* * *

> DEAN (over the phone): Hiya, Crowley.
> 
> CROWLEY: Dean. It’s been a long time. We should get together.
> 
> DEAN (over the phone): Sure. We’ll have to do that when I get back.

*stares mournfully out of the window*

I need another complex AU theory to explain how they ended up actually meeting up for drinks regularly.

* * *

OH this is where that excellent quote comes from:

> BOBBY: You demons. You think you’re something special. But you’re just spirits. Twisted, perverted, evil spirits. But, end of the day, you’re nothing but ghosts with an ego. (Crowley has his jaw set) We torch your bones, you go up in flames. 

* * *

> DEAN (over the phone, clicking lighter) You hear that, Crowley?
> 
> DEAN: That’s me flicking my Bic for you.

… Can you not go 1 minute without making this weird, Dean?

Hindsight is fatal. Nope, none of it meant anything until they decided to make a love triangle. >.>

* * *

> DEAN: You know, now that I think about it, maybe I’ll just (clicks lighter) napalm your ass anyhow.
> 
> Crowley just looks at Dean as Sam extinguishes the flame of the lighter in Dean’s hand.
> 
> SAM: Dean, he’s a dick, but a deal’s a deal.
> 
> Crowley walks past the boys.
> 
> CROWLEY: (to Sam) I don’t need you fight my battles for me, Moose. Get bent.

That’s interesting, because last season it was Sam who tried to kill Crowley like 3 times, and Dean defended him each time because he was useful.

So the current score vs Crowley is Sam 3, Dean 1 for honest intent to kill… 

Sam is NOT emotively interested in killing Crowley as he was when he went for him in anger the first couple of times - in a way following the logic of honouring deals is much more up Crowley’s line of thinking anyway, hence “fight my battles” - it’s Crowley who cares about deals. (Also compare to Sam going along with Cas regretfully deciding they had to torture Aaron Birch last episode - 2 times in a row he’s been aligned with non-human thinking.)

* * *

I am more upset about Bobby not getting to eat that peach cobbler than I am about every accumulative moment of Dean being denied pie. :<


	5. 6x05

Or: … I am morbidly curious about the new Twilight book, I have to admit. Which has no relation to this but I feel I should confess that somewhere.

* * *

I am always impressed by the Bella and Edward lookalikes they found.

And by how much fun they clearly had pretending to be Bella and Edward. You know, until it goes south and he actually turns out to be a monster. :P

* * *

I’m always not sure what to make of this episode overall - there’s a shade too much just making fun of teenage girls for liking a thing. And yet the books have their actual flaws with the unhealthy relationship becoming a role model sort of thing at the height of the craze especially (and I weathered that online on a writers’ forum that was very snooty and concerned for the general human population as a result of the books so it’s particularly hard for me to step back and allow that some people just liked them for fun with all the scaremongering I read back in the day :P), and then in  _this_  universe that same dynamic of what people were worried about with girls getting into bad relationships because of Edward-like guys is sort of abstracted to a “lol what about a universe with actual vampires who discover the craze?”… I know Sera Gamble is on record saying she loves Twilight etc, so on the showrunner level there’s fond mocking not cruel mocking for OKing the episode, but I’m not super fond of the writer of the individual episode ([these are his 3 episodes](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supernaturalwiki.com%2Findex.php%3Ftitle%3DBrett_Matthews&t=YWRkMTU2NWJlODE2MThjYTQyZDM0OWEyM2EwMmQyOTE0YzdiNjkwZiwzeWowblJKTw%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F130979377238%2F6x05-rewatch-or-i-am-morbidly-curious-about-the&m=1)) and I always felt like some of this was a step too far in just being mean about the craze.

* * *

Anyway Lizzy vs season 6 is a thing, if you had not already gathered by my tag and disclaimer on pretty much every episode even the ones I mostly like. :P

* * *

> KRISTIN’s FATHER. Kristin’s a good kid. A little naive, sure… You try to be a good parent. Girls are hard. 

Stuff like that. :P

* * *

Oooor the whole sequence in her room.

Imagine if Dean had done that thing where he secretly seems to kind of like the idea of the romance books? 

It wouldn’t be out of character for him to secretly express interest in feminine-coded things and especially media he could have accidentally come across, except in the way that his “character” is completely misunderstood with the surface level and this is a new writer and  _honestly_  of those 3 episodes I can not remember him ever doing the sort of things with characterisation that I tune in for. :P

I mean Dean brushes off knowing “Lautner” without apparent shadiness about  _actually_  knowing about him in secret depth like we all know Jensen’s face can convey, and Sam knows who it is as well AND that he’s a werewolf in the books, and casually tries Pattinson for the password on her laptop from his own memory, so they’re presented as equally aware of the actors and the pop culture around the books, and therefore equally uninterested and derisive of it?

IF NOTHING ELSE it’s breaking the Ultimate No 1 Rule of writing the brothers which is to make every moment except for where it’s actually plot relevant to have them in unison, to make them at odds. :P There’s literally nothing to gain from making Sam n Dean a unit on this one, not least because on all the emotional/character issues we SHOULD have Soulless Sam rearing his head to make the point he’s currently a dick, and Dean as the emotional counterpart. The contrast of even a  _little_  interest or sympathy to the subject matter from Dean would highlight Sam’s response as the less sympathetic. Which means it really is uniting them just to mock this subject.

* * *

*spends a few minutes trying to remember who this kid Dean falsely thinks is a vampire is because of the Great Actor Recycling Programme*

 _oooh_  he’s Deputy Douche. Of course. 

Remembering him flirting with Dean in 10x08 is much preferable to all this. :P

This is my second not-very-analytical rewatch in a row but tbh I just don’t want to get into the discussions here. >.> Though Dean’s grumpy dad-ness (”Use a condom!”) and general rather than specific disgust does seem to come across a bit “kids these days” with everything to do with this subculture they’re observing and he mostly just seems surprised in a less judgemental way with the gay couple he observes - he’s still in dad!Dean mode from his year out and he’s actively more grossed out and dismissive of this guy’s heterosexual pick up routine pretending to be a vampire and wearing false fangs (that gets the biggest yuk face :P) than the surprise he expressed at the random gay couple. Although again possibly because involving glitter in your make up routine as a dude to pick up chicks seems too effeminate for him to credit or something. >.> 

Like I said, not poking at this one in detail.

* * *

Anyway not least because this immediately goes to the assault from the big vamp guy, and that at least is coded unequivocally as a sexual assault. (Later we are given the “out” that he was picking victims based on prettiness to get more bait to lure the girls in but like… that does not actually improve anything to hear a justification behind why he was calling Dean pretty on his approach, never mind the actual actions of turning Dean.)

* * *

Actually if we’re ignoring all that a minor thing that makes me laugh is the way the vampire waves goodbye and disappears off up the wall moving like I dunno a pantomime villain or something, just cheerfully scampering up the wall. It seems kind of ridiculous. There’s all sorts of odd stuff about the tone of this episode.

* * *

Though I think the club was called the Black Rose it uses the neon Blue Rose from the motel waaaaaay back in 2x10 when Sam and Ava chilled together. S’pose if you want to make a thing about it that was Sam connecting with another special child who later we knew had been infected with demon blood and here’s Dean getting infected into a monster by blood. 

Hey, it’s right next to Sam most clearly:

Maybe it’s just a “there’s something wrong with Sam” rose.

* * *

Cut to Dean with my exact headache where noise and light is too much. 

* * *

*checks teeth to make sure my noise and light sensitivity isn’t actually vampirism*

* * *

They’re in another inner city hotel with dark flowery wall paper and random exposed brick work - similar to 6x03′s hotel. Very low-key motels in 6x02 and last episode and a lot of effort on the hotels so far this season. Not sure that’s a lasting pattern but I remember tracking hotels for a while with the vague idea there was something more interesting about their use, and at the moment I can’t remember what, aside from this being a dark parallel to how it often cropped up in conjunction to Bobby showing up and saving them or them showing up and saving Bobby (it was a pattern!). Samuel being sort of the anti-Bobby this season, makes sense to have a dark ominous hotel to show the corruption of this utterly random pattern that I can not believe holds up to like at least 4 seasons of lazy analysis at this point.

Anyway the grotty bricks painted over with this ghastly green sheen really fit the aesthetic of this episode and Dean’s transformation (he’s wearing similar colours to the room), and it’s fitting the room is  **their**  sort of gothic vs the peppy teenage girl goth from the bedroom earlier. Like, the black wallpaper with depressing blue flowers is about as goth as their hotels ever get. :P

* * *

Dean figuring out something’s up with Sam by hearing how calm his heart is is one of the creepier things this episode. About Sam, I mean. It’s a given Dean is gonna hear weird crap. But hearing  _that_. Brr. He isn’t sure about what he saw as far as I can recall but by next episode he is completely skeeved out by Soulless Sam and I think this does not help. :P

* * *

I guess though that Dean thinking Sam won’t kill him is because Sam is being Sam but it’s because he’s using Dean as bait. Abstracting how Dean typically feels about Sam from his in the moment creeping feeling about him being wrong.

* * *

> DEAN. C'mon, man, I’m a monster, okay? This is NOT a problem that you spit-ball. We gotta deal with this before I hurt somebody. 

Dean’s back to black and white thinking about monsters, anyway, with no perceptible shift or explanation for why he had a different view in 6x02 - I feel like this one might not have been a solid theme of the season since there aren’t any ~human monsters~ (dumb phrasing, sorry) I can think of except for Lenore for 5 minutes in 6x19 (I may be blanking a serious chunk of the season because Lizbob vs season 6 - though the phoenix had a pretty human motive in 6x18 but these are much later examples?) so if it’s not a Theme with a capital T, since Glass (new writer) and Brett Matthews (new writer) are responsible for these, they may have just been taking random stabs in the dark with Dean’s characterisation on this subject based on stuff that stuck out to them whenever they did their catch up on How To Write Dean 101. 

Anyway, this episode becomes about him not giving in and killing anyone like we saw Gordon do waaay back when - I suppose the comparison of Gordon as a dark bloodthirsty mirror of Dean as a hunter holds out with them paralleled across 4 seasons for this moment, since Gordon started off in 2x03 with an arc paralleled to Dean about how he was the more bloodthirsty hunter - and he cracked and drank peeps in his vampire episode, and so Dean is faced with the same challenge and riiight back to 2x03, stands up to it the same way as he stood up to Gordon.

It raises some interesting questions about the inherent nature of monsters. The transformation stage always seems to be the hardest and when the craving for blood is the worst. New vampires always seem sick before they eat and in some cases for a little while after (the first episode with vampires didn’t prolong that stage but the longer the show runs the more they play with this grey area, especially once the cure is introduced. At least in the case of vampires, with them being such common monsters especially as the show rolls on, it opens up a different sort of analysis to them. Having even one monster where there is a clean cure makes for some examination of this half-way state.) I sort of think the cure out of the blue was a bit random for this episode and only introduced so they could play with this grey area specifically for Dean, but once the grey area is established, later episodes do some interesting things with it. And though here there’s a black and white “once you drink you’re doomed” thing, we have vampires like Benny who are obviously beyond a cure, but try not to drink anyway (and his presence of course through casting calls back to the first vampires we saw who did this, and loop us back to Gordon once more. :P The vampire arc of this show might be a little wobbly but I think it holds up as an interesting sub-strand of the show to look at as one piece…)

* * *

> SAM. How’s it feel?
> 
> DEAN. NOW? Now you wanna talk about my feelings?
> 
> SAM. No, I mean…physically.
> 
> DEAN. How do you THINK it feels? Not good!

Well that wasn’t a foreshadowy conversation about Sam at all. :P I am curious about Sam being curious about how it feels to turn into a vampire. There’s been a lot of stuff happening to Dean and incidentally Sam - Sam was apparently dosed up by the djinn off-screen before 6x01 ever started, and made no mention of what actually happened to him when it happened. (I’m curious if they were working on killing you with fear if Sam would actually have been  _immune_  or something - maybe just momentarily passed out from the poison’s generic sleep inducing effect and was revived by the cure and added that to the pile of stuff he’s not mentioning about how he’s feeling strange.) And the alpha shapeshifter copied both but got right up in Dean’s face and made more of a deal of being him than just knocking Sam out or whatever… (I already can’t remember that interaction too well but I feel like Sam had no significant part? The POV is so strongly with Dean here.) In 6x03 they were paralleled again with Sam before the episode having sex and Dean starting the episode dreaming about a more passionate moment with Lisa with an emphasis on Sam’s lack of passion in the contrast… Last episode with the monster we saw Sam mostly being thrown around off-screen to conceal the monster from us (we only ever saw a claw) and Dean on-screen following Bobby’s instructions. Now Dean is becoming a vampire and Sam is asking about the experience but not sharing in it.

It’s an interesting set of negative/positive parallels for them and it’s pretty subtle but it does do this thing of enforcing Dean’s POV even in Weekend at Bobby’s where the POV is technically Bobby, and also showing the lack of emotion/screentime/reactions/whatever from Sam. That little chunk of dialogue is just hideously on the nose when we know what’s up with Sam and sounds rather like the same thing when he’s asked how  _he_  feels while Cas is diagnosing his soullessness. 

* * *

Anyway Dean gets back to all the angsty mirror staring and stuff because this happens all the time when grim introspection is required.

Since Sam is concealing that Samuel can cure Dean, he’s facing death down again as far as he’s concerned. Watching the slow way he transforms into what he will have to die for because he can’t in good conscience live this way - just like Gordon except he doesn’t even have some righteous mission powering on, just a whole lot of ??? over what’s happening to him and in the wider plot and now he’s in a grotty hotel bathroom after one bad fight, convinced this is the inglorious end, like, 5 random encounters with the supernatural after the Big Apocalypse Showdown. Poor Dean.

The mortality reminder coming right before he messes up with Lisa and Ben is like one of a bazillion things that happen in this short space of 6x02-6x06 to convince Dean that the idea of him being allowed to have the apple pie life is a cruel joke… Does he ever actually have an uncomplicated slice of pie after this? :P I think the only time he ever got to eat it was Karen Singer’s zombie pie.

* * *

Anyway Dean escapes via the window and then sneaks in through Lisa’s like a proper creature of the night because he is melodramatic as fuck sometimes.

(I still think this scene could have worked better with him being less outright critical of the books in the earlier part of the episode.)

* * *

> LISA. You’re talking about your work?
> 
> DEAN. I’m talking about my LIFE. It’s ugly…and it’s violent…and I’m gonna die – SOON.

What episode/season is this again? Oh DEAN. :< You never like hunting and say stuff like this all the time. You also say you shouldn’t have brought it home to her (probably implying, like, ever showed up on her door in the first place) but I’m just so sad that this was a happy place. And now he regrets it. 

*sad about Lisa and Dean*

* * *

*quietly applauds Lisa for grabbing Ben and dragging him to hide in her bedroom even as Dean legs it out of the house, without caring at all about yelling anything after Dean and just being concerned to get Ben safe* :3

* * *

Season 6 is so dark green all the time.

* * *

> SAMUEL. Can’t keep track of your brother now?
> 
> SAM. Well, I didn’t think he’d just –
> 
> SAMUEL. He’s not himself, Sam. He’s a monster and he’s hungry. You gotta be prepared to do the right thing.
> 
> DEAN. I told you he’d kill me when he showed up.
> 
> (SAM and SAMUEL look over to see DEAN hunched against a cabinet, in the dark. They quickly draw their machetes.)

MELODRAMA. this boy will be the death of me.

I swear Dean’s voice has got even gruffer too.

* * *

Oh, Dean’s on an orange background too, like he was last episode. Maybe it wasn’t just about cheese. (I swear I had a legit reason for that when watching.)

I like that this episode is gratuitous scary eyes Dean but like, in a non-permanent way like season 9 was just harrowing to live through. :P With hindsight I always thinks he looks older when he does the scary eyes but actually I think I may just be flashing back to season 9 all the time. 

* * *

Yeah when they’re sitting at the table the same background colours are behind Samuel (dark blue/green) Sam (yellow/green) and Dean (orange.) I mean in-universe they probably all just walked at the table in the same positions they were in during the standing up phase of this conversation and didn’t bother squabbling over a different seating arrangement, but for meta purposes they’re being aligned with these colours apparently by the repeated association. 

* * *

I am intrigued by Samuel’s grandfather’s journal just because there’s this mystery drawing on it and the page is constantly in motion so you can’t see it clearly but I want to know :P

  


It’s hard to read (impossible without giffing it because of the blur around the edges and how much back and forth on your player you have to do to catch each line because you can’t pause it) but there’s “never recovered” underlined in red to draw the eye which is the only thing they want you to see then, on casual viewing glance, to give the idea of how dangerous and risky even this cure is. 

It’s a discussion about 2 women - Elizabeth and Constance, who both seem to have been treated? 

> The room that held them captive was covered with holy scripture and sacred symbols, rein-forced with iron sheets and fastened to iron stands. An interesting note is that Elizabeth was cured and regained her strength after four long and arduous months but alas poor Constance never recovered from the [trial?]

Presumably they’re rescued victims who’d just been turned. It SOUNDS like the Campbells held them captive after - which would be why symbols etc? False old ideas about religion helping to cure them. Iron doesn’t have a canon effect on vampires either so far as I can recall (aside from machetes lol). Since the cure worked on Elizabeth but Constance never recovered there’s a 50:50 chance for Dean I suppose. And it says MONTHS. 

I’m… a lil happy that this random Elizabeth was okay for selfish reasons. :P

Anyway, Samuel hauling around his grandfather’s journal is interesting in of itself for the comparison to the Winchesters with their journal. The way he talks about “family recipe” and their general cohesiveness as family of hunters (issues with Mary leaving and then a whole branch of the family dying etc aside) makes this feel like more of an heirloom, and later we see his library full of old books and journals. Granted, they could have collected some separately by different means than inheritance, but it makes me wonder if Colt was a relation on this side of the family, which makes his interactions with Sam interesting especially if Sam never twigs that detail either, and of course re-casts seasons 1&2 very interestingly. 

* * *

> SAMUEL. Hey – the cure is good. But a lot of this is on YOU. You drink, you’re done. It won’t work. I’m talking one drop of human blood –
> 
> DEAN. I got it.
> 
> SAMUEL. Do you? Because you WILL feed. It’s a matter of time.

Some more nature of the monster stuff… A rather grim idea of the inherent hunger and brutality of being a monster, showing giving into it as a weakness that they’re just prone to. I dunno, probably applications metaphorically outside of this.

* * *

*extremely blatant conversation to make you know something’s wrong with Sam when even Samuel is suspicious about how callous Sam is being about the whole thing*

* * *

Dean does an extremely clever thing with a bit of string to get in the vampire nest. I approve. (Considering new writer, and I thought Glass did something (can not remember what) to emphasise Smart Dean in his first episode I feel like this WAS on a post it note for them. :P)

Though if vampires smell so well, how did they not know he was lurking in the shadows nearby. He could have just knocked. They’d let him in.

* * *

The Edward guy (I know he’s not called that) is really tall or made to look it because Dean’s looking up at him. There’s that long moment of supposed enemies facing each other (not that they know he’s a hunter? He was turned because he was cute?) and then Edward is like, cool, let’s get you dinner. 

*Dean casually adopted into this creepy as hell family*

…

In an episode where he just officially did something awful enough coming to the house as monster and shoving Ben that he’s never going to get over it so I’m officially counting him severed ties from his LAST adopted family with Lisa and Ben. As a result of him becoming a vampire. Basically this is partially all a metaphor about Teh Hunting Life swallowing him back up again. Even though he doesn’t accept this family’s food and shelter, he is greeted with open arms… Probs enough for this to work. :P

* * *

*creepy vampire fist bump of welcomes* he DOES return that.

* * *

… Season 6 is weird.

* * *

The caged halo lights are back, there’s hanging sheets they have to walk past to get further into the vampire nest, and we see Dean’s reflection split in two in the glass of the door, all within a few seconds of each other. Never mind the relentless imagery of prison bars and cages in general.

*desperately paddling around in all the various symbolism chucked at us*

Well I established that the sheets were the transition from civvie to hunter for Dean, and the caged halos are presumably about being trapped in the life, among all the other various things that turn up when you shake around “cage” and “halo” in this season. Dean’s split reflection shows a dual identity: in this episode’s case, human or monster? In the wider themes, again, Dean finding his way back and this episode being where they create the fracture between his chance to live the life with Lisa. Even her original deal from 6x02 was a split identity be a hunter but come see me deal. He’s been floating between the two since.

In this episode obviously Dean manages to not drink anyone and kill the vampire he needs to, reclaiming agency, and of course by doing some badass stuff and also getting sucked into the story further by finding out about the Alpha Vamp’s plans etc sort of solidifies his identity as a hunter again. He gets reborn human after being cured and it’s on the other side of this transformation where all this was at stake. 

I mean obviously he spends most of 6x06 dithering over calling Lisa but… I’ll get to that when I eventually watch it. :P It’s basically dithering over dread of hearing what she has to say, even without the truth spell knowing the conversation won’t be good, and of course the sides are picked again so he’s now beyond rejoining her as it once was, despite being cured of being the monster that threatened her and hurt Ben.

* * *

Oh look yellow/orange light again in that fridge full of blood being offered to Dean. 

* * *

> ROBERT. Yeah, uh, about that… Company line is we, we don’t just kill people anymore… But you gotta tell me what that’s like.
> 
> DEAN. Yeah. Yeah, first chance I get, I’ll…I’ll show you myself.

Oh look a monster curious about Dean’s experience as a monster.

????

Completely and utterly unrelated to the (Soulless)Sam parallel, I’m unfortunately beginning to ship Dean and not!Edward because this is completely fucked up and I’m laughing non-stop and, basically, help me.

* * *

This is what happens when you can only muster the energy to watch 5 minutes at a time for a week so the last 2 days of your existence have been low-key this one sequence.

* * *

I mean not!Edward is tempting Dean super hard with the blood, and he’s SO THIRSTY.

* * *

[AH YES THIS SET.](http://justanotheridijiton.tumblr.com/post/107162646589/jerry-wanek-on-supernatural-in-the-december-2010)

* * *

Poor not!Bella is being forced to write bad poetry now - a fate worse than death :< 

I guess she is already a vampire? I can’t remember Dean saving anyone here, just having to kill them all.

(Bah I feel sorry for her getting put through a random ironic punishment and extra abuse just for being a foil to actual Bella.)

* * *

*Boris the vampire casually being disgusting to literally everyone* love that sexual assault vibe goin’ in this episode >.>

* * *

More prominent yellow lights, and the window above them has yellow panes of glass in it. Yellow light is definitely a strong thing right now. It’s been getting paler all episode, considering Dean was linked with really murky orange to start with.

* * *

I wonder if because the alpha vamp is a grade A pervert this is part of why vampires in general seem to be the monstrous sexuality monsters? A sort of in-world explanation offered belatedly for the meta analysis of why that comes up with them more than most monsters. I mean the monstrous sexuality thing has always been with the vampire sub-genre, even pre-dating Dracula, so it’s unimaginative to do but they are tropeily the “sexy” monster to begin with.

I’m too sleepy to offer up a whole long essay on this. Just making displeased faces at Boris and wondering.

* * *

You know, the alpha vamp’s communication interrupts Boris and Dean’s fight - you got to wonder how many vampires got in serious trouble fighting someone who wasn’t about to just collapse for the same reason.

* * *

Aw Dean killed Robert. *pouts*

* * *

*still thinking about the corny horror look of the vision*

*feeling like in-universe that was all aesthetic choices from the alpha vamp*

*idly wonders who the director is*

Oh he literally did this one episode. 

* * *

God, Boris is gross but any time he’s not being gross he’s so ridiculously cartoonish I can’t take him seriously at all.

* * *

Like with everything the reveal about Dean having killed Boris is kinda badass but then somehow it just seems ridiculous to me?

I dunno this is the episode with the vampire fist bump.

It’s nearly over.

* * *

This cure is gross. Did not need to see that much on-screen vomiting.

Bonus bloody contact lenses *nopes out of this* because I have had more than enough of those contact lenses with Cas this week :( :( 

I swear those happened for Gordon immediately after he was turned. Dean couldn’t get compromised with something so unpretty that we couldn’t look at him all episode.

*glares even harder at Cas’s chin where I’ve been looking any time he’s on screen in season 11*

* * *

Oh good it’s finally over. :P 

I wonder if Sam is faking that thing where he’s in sync with Dean over these episode as well. 

He’s definitely getting worse at faking concern what with asking Dean what he saw in the vamp nest while Dean is literally seconds away from barfing his guts up, then repeating the question the moment Dean’s out of the bathroom afterwards.

* * *

*Dean fails to call Lisa*

Considering the metaphor I was referring to at the top re: Twilight’s influence was abusive relationships, makes you wonder about the metaphor in reverse here where “sorry I was a vampire when I shoved your kid” doesn’t cut it.

I mean it doesn’t and Dean knows that - even knows it was a stupid thing to have done when he gets back to the hotel immediately after or even when he’s talking to Lisa before he shoves Ben, that bringing home the bad crap from work is bad for them.

I’m not qualified to talk about this at all, so… more vaguely proposed thoughts.

… I need a better note to end this on.

Final reaction? I am Dean after being fist-bumped by a vampire:


	6. 6x06

Or: tbh I like this episode. 

Cas is in it for like 12 whole seconds. The rule applies: this is a major plot episode.

* * *

Oh it MUST be a Major Plot Epiosde. It has a Biggersons in the opening.

This Biggersons has those dividers with the inverted crosses on which show up from time to time.

*checks this isn’t a Carver episode because by “time to time” I mean “in Carver episodes*

*remembers Carver left for Gamble era*

Seems I’ve hit Snymelo episodes for the first time.

* * *

Poor Jane in the opening. :(

I feel there’s a parallel here with 4x22 and her sister telling her she’s a freak over the phone - this time it IS the truth and no one’s replacing her words and her sister really does think those awful things about her and is being made to say them - I suppose whatever Dean felt about Sam (their fight at the end of 4x21 did go there after all and say similar stuff) the fact from his end he was willing to apologise and regretted it means that his words in the phonecall had to be changed to something more negative to stay with their previous fight so it’s only from Sam’s end that he gets this apparently never apologised for cutting of ties from Dean that pushes him to the self-destructive act at the end of the season… I dunno. We’re getting sad Sam stuff from character mirrors because he is currently not up to feeling sad about stuff? Reminding us of some emotional moments from his story to contrast him being unemotional? I mean the recap was pretty focused on something not being right with Sam, for obvious reasons.

* * *

I was about to express surprise that Bobby was physically in this episode rather than just being represented by a one-sided phonecall, but of course this is not the only Bobby phonecall this episode.

> BOBBY  
> Well, then he’s something we ain’t ever seen before.
> 
> DEAN  
> Yeah, or it’s freakin’ Lucifer.
> 
> BOBBY  
> Did you call Cas?
> 
> DEAN  
> ‘Course I called Cas. He’s not answering. Screw him. I can’t wait anymore.

I am darkly amused by the idea of Lucifer actually coming back and being just, like, screw the apocalypse maybe I will just be Sam for a bit. Lucifer going hunting. Lucifer pretending not to be a big bad angel and sort of saving people for a change. Being creepy as hell and all the other stuff Soulless Sam is but not actually maliciously trying to end the world.

Anyway this episode is the real start of the “angrily use Cas for info and help only after much badgering” thing that marks this season out and probably gives back up to the accusation that Dean only likes Cas as a tool, even though this is the exception that proves the rule and it’s obvious throughout that he’s hurt that he and Cas have become emotionally distanced. If anything it could be a complete flipping around to mirror their story so far: in season 4 he mostly came to bother Dean unpredictably to ask for help on the behalf of Heaven (notable exceptions aside that showed a different Cas underneath) and season 5 they helped each other here and there, working to the same broader goal so it felt much more equal when they were doing the asking. Now though the season is going to be set up on this whole thing of Cas not asking them for help (unless it’s The French Mistake which I’m still not sure wasn’t entirely Balthazar’s idea and he jumped on them before Cas could come up with an alternative, much in the same way My Heart Will Go On only accidentally became their problem :P) and them constantly asking Cas for help for situations it turns out he was mostly responsible for in the first place. 

Paralleled also to Bobby in 6x04 snapping and asking them if they’d help him for once and they do and pull through - the end of the season is the dark version of that where it bubbles over badly and there is no pulling through but falling out. (6x04 and 6x20 are genuinely mirrors of each other in multiple intriguing ways considering the start contrast in mood :P)

(On the other hand the very valid point always remains that there were no valid options for them to work with outside of Cas doing his thing anyway, and perhaps only honesty and agreement on it would have actually made it less of a mess emotionally and I dunno it could have been some big heroic sacrifice from Cas instead.)

So since this is the first plot episode since Cas was reintroduced as a viable person to call up again, Dean’s now pestering him to help with Sam since the problem has become main plot worthy, and this episode is structured around Dean reaching out with calls to Bobby, Lisa and Cas. The only difference being with Cas the call is a prayer and he comes right to Dean rather than talking over the line :P

* * *

I really like Bobby’s red mug. 

* * *

> DEAN  
> Hey. I was just, uh, I was leaving Lisa a message.
> 
> SAM  
> Still hasn’t called you back, huh?
> 
> DEAN  
> No.

Lie no 1. 

> DEAN, stilted  
> Yeah. I’m fine. How are you? 

(Lie no. 2)

So yeah in the first scene we have all 3 calls established - Bobby once again present on-screen accessible by phone, Lisa that Dean’s reached out to a few times (we saw him try and fail to leave a message at the end of last episode so we know if he hasn’t talked to her there IS truth that he has tried) and of course Dean saying he’s been calling Cas but not getting an answer.

Interesting that Bobby is the easy line of communication and then Cas and Lisa are compared as difficult to call for various complex emotional reasons.

:3

* * *

I have no idea why Dean and orange is a thing but it’s absolutely a thing. 

He walks past an orange cloth on the wall and then we see him next to a completely orange wall. That’s 3 episodes in a row he’s been strongly associated with orange - that I’ve been paying attention to. 

(Although in 6x03 he was blending in seamlessly with the gloomy flowers on the hotel wall so that was more of a thing that I noticed and when they want you to notice a colour association, you NOTICE a colour association :P)

I suppose it might be a building warning about Sam being off, since that’s been the very obvious thing that has been building up from 6x04 as the main topic of discussion, just showing how on edge he is about Sam…

(Sam meanwhile has still kind of got green associated with him?)

* * *

Hmm, the Harry’s House of Horns sticker/fridge magnet is tiny and we see Dean pay it absolutely no attention. (Sam mentions a tuba but that doesn’t count. :P) I know it’s a pretty common headcanon that Dean’s got a photographic memory, but yeah, if I needed any more convincing.

*notes that this is yet another new writer episode with an interesting smart!Dean moment*

I feel like this season if nothing else is atoning for the stretches of the show where I’ve been sobbing about how misrepresented my poor Dean is. :P

* * *

V. important things:

The MotW’s co-host is a pineapple.

* * *

And Dean is on the phone again with Bobby, still complaining about Sam.

(Who did make some very scary faces in the last witness interview - it was like they asked Jared to just pull the creepiest faces he could out of context and then used whichever ones they liked :P)

Anyway, Dean’s still reaching out. In this case from Bobby he gets an uncomfortable truth to contemplate that there might just be something inherently wrong with Sam - like, to consider that there may not necessarily be a supernatural problem with him but that he’s this way as a consequence of what he’s been through.

(I mean obviously Bobby is just guessing, but the way Dean is reaching out to him is for some information to try and shield him from an idea such as Sam being broken like that, so Bobby’s words are a harsh truth in that they force Dean to think about something he doesn’t want to.)

* * *

Dean’s still drinking beer at this point.

He switches to the hard stuff when Cas is around :P

*abortive attempt to call Lisa*

*Dean’s talking about the non-sexy kind of drilling*

Even Soulless Sam thinks it’s weird that Dean wants to do research.

Which is funny when we go back to Dean vs research in season 5 using it to show something was ~wrong~ with him while also showing that he was actually much more prone to just doing research than anyone thought… I honestly haven’t been counting Sam vs Dean for being the one doing the research but Sam definitely seems to enjoy it more and sound excited about the things he finds… [[edit re-reading this part after 11x02… no, no, Sam will be researching from the grave. It’s an inherent character trait vs Dean’s inherent things like the photographic memory and comparatively better detective skills as in Sam can do it but Dean thinks best solving problems on his feet]] 

Dean complains but he still sits and does it an awful lot. However when it comes to showing something wrong with him they immediately go to “Dean never does research!!” and so Sam is like ??? about Dean deciding to stay behind.

It’s an interesting balance that gets drawn on a lot while ignoring all the normal times Dean does research when it isn’t being used to show something is wrong with him and he’s just casually pulling his weight on a case.

* * *

Heh, there’s been some discussion of temperature in season 11 and this is just reminding me of it because in 11x01 there was the unsubtle “What happened here?” “SHE” on the car with its door open. In this case, it’s the end of Police around Sam - 

and a moment before to introduce the scene, the flag concealing the first part of this word a few times as it flaps:

I suppose because he’s stone cold at the moment. :P

* * *

In contrast to all the orange earlier this room is blue and considering Dean spends way more time there without Sam it’s sort of for him again - 6x02 had a blue motel room associated with him as well, so I guess that’s for the rest of his mood or something.

You can see here that he’s still researching Sam, not the case (so another lie) and in this case Sam is calling in rather than him calling Sam - the exception to the way Dean reaches out in all the other phonecalls of the episode. (For sake of argument a prayer is a phonecall). That’s the very same Destiel fanart that was featured in 4x02 when Bobby was researching angels pulling people out of Hell, and so something that Dan would have already read over if he actually did the reading that they meant to settle in to do in 4x02 before everything else happened that episode. I’m guessing he finished reading up on angels some point early in the season. :P Anyway, it’s the start of the repurposeing of the imagery of Dean’s resurrection to Sam, which will culminate with Cas’s awfully delivered “raised you from perdition” to Sam in 6x20 - as always I can’t trust that they were really building up to that reveal this early on but if they were this does start layering it in nicely.

…

Huh, interestingly when Dean hangs up with Sam we get a second close up angle and apparently without him touching the laptop it’s switched:

I’m genuinely scared to credit season 6 with Serious Plot Cohesion before the mid-point (I’m not even sure Eve’s introduction was done fully knowing if she’d be the big bad or just the little bad before the big bad :P) 

* * *

Oops Dean goes to investigate the dentist and immediately has an orange window beside him that was never visible before.

This episode is definitely balancing orange and blue.

* * *

*Dean instantly puts together the House of Horns thing*

* * *

Did… did the missing horn actually have anything to do with this story? I can’t remember what the spell was in the end but I don’t *think* it had anything to do with the goddess?

* * *

*laughs at the art department forgetting to change what Dean searched for*

I love snooping at the extra text though, every time. 

I love the way that just reading the word “Gabriel” makes Dean reach for a drink. He’s upgraded to the hard stuff and appears to have drunk almost a whole glass before starting this research.

(The page with the picture of Gabriel and his horn is basically word salad aside from the picture)

* * *

15 minutes in and it’s a Cas problem!

Dean says “Castiel” a lot more this season, compared to how he had been “Cas” all through seasons 4-5 after the introductory phase. It’s obvious just from word choice how they’re removed from each other this season.

* * *

Gosh Cas’s voice is so gravelly this episode. I don’t even knooow.

* * *

See also: [my enduring sadness about this moment](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/108176897718/tell-me-what-is-the-purpose-of-the-scene-in-6x06). (my entire 6x06 tag at present moment is just this scene :P)

I’m still ambivalent if Cas was  _intentionally_  fuelling Dean’s alcoholism but it’s certainly a side-effect of the scene. This whole moment is a very strange trust exercise/something that seems like it should be a bonding moment - pouring a drink for a friend when he wants a refill 

* * *

> CASTIEL  
> No, he’s… he’s not Lucifer.
> 
> DEAN  
> And how do you know that?
> 
> CASTIEL  
> If Lucifer escaped the cage, we’d feel it.

Again with the “we” from Cas - this time he IS telling the truth or at least not actively concealing the truth - he knows it is not Lucifer and he’s not being asked directly what got Sam out, but he is still talking about the Heavenly Host in general rather than his personal feelings on the matter - which is a tell about lying, I believe, ducking behind group thinking when explaining motives.

* * *

> DEAN  
> What happened to you, Cas? You used to be human, or at least like one.
> 
> CASTIEL  
> I’m at war. Certain… regrettable things are now required of me.

*quiet sad noises about this line forever* (And the way Cas loooooks as he says it…)

Dean thought Cas being like human was good - Cas expressed his own “I’m useless” in 5x21 but ultimately had a crowning moment of awesome in 5x22 - and was rewarded for it by becoming an angel again, though (with Bobby being mysteriously resurrected too of course :P) him being resurrected but as human would have been the fairytale end for the series if it had ended there and with a nice Destiel ending. :P

Here we’re now beyond Dean n Lisa (well the ultimate break up is later this episode but functionally it’s over) and the Dean n Cas stuff that hooked me by the end of this season is sneakily starting to build up. I’ve always felt this line could be the real start of any human!Cas endgame thing, even setting aside the Destiel stuff - Cas’s response is still surprising to me even now. It’s  _regrettable_  to him that he can’t spend time to help Dean, sure, and it’s regrettable that he has to have this attitude which is making Dean resentful, sure, but in the real context, that Cas was once near-human and Dean complains about that, and Cas says the fact he can’t be human-like (FOR DEAN) is a regrettable thing… 

I feel like the fact Cas was resurrected as an angel kind of forced him into his position he assumed - if there had been space for him with Dean and the end of ~The Story~ had been the end, then Cas probably would not have recovered his status… That he’s spurred on by his recovery giving him a sense of purpose AS an angel and the fact there is still more to do… [[post 11x02 thoughts - that episode made me feel a lot of sad thoughts about the way Cas has internalised being an angel as part of his identity and Heaven denying him that identity is extremely harsh… I feel like these thoughts I had here are relevant to Cas’s ongoing long term feeling that he should be an angel as well, especially when we analyse how he felt when describing his emotions right after the resurrection. Even with the shit he goes through after that, there’s some things that have been enforced and an awful lot of Cas’s “now” problems really go back season 6 & 7 rather than his introduction - the Apocalypse really was simpler :P]]

I dunno this is all gross headcanoning of a beautiful AU :P But I feel like it’s something that lurks below the surface here: Dean n Cas had a separation at the end of Swan Song and it was an emotional one as well as a physical one. They’re essentially divorced from their previous arranged marriage by the breaking of The Story and the tearing up of the pages - that was an arrangement made in Heaven for them and though they turned it to their own thing and so on, their break up conversation at the end of Swan Song rested on the idea of freedom being granted to them and the sense that in freedom they were now at the point where they went their separate ways: Dean to his “hands off this is sacred” retirement with Lisa, and Cas becoming fully angel again to supposedly be integrated back into running Heaven.

Now the Lisa arrangement has dissolved, and Cas is having trouble with his Heaven problem, so much that the two things - Dean getting back into the life and Cas struggling - lap over again. But they have to rebuild this ground between them and there’s a gulf to cross. Ultimately, thanks to the theme of this episode, about lies and concealed truths, and Cas carries that further than anyone, as it becomes his major thing of the season when we finally get his account of it all… So though his appearance here is pretty random for the overall episode, it’s important to get him down here and involved, if only to tar him with the important theme…

* * *

> DEAN  
> And Gabriel’s Horn of Truth? That’s a real thing?
> 
> CASTIEL  
> You’ve seen it?
> 
> DEAN  
> We think it’s in town. Something’s forcing people…

*quiet sobbing about 9x18*

It’s interesting to learn later that this one at least is a spell… Or maybe there’s a spell that replicates what the actual horn would do, which seems a very Metatron solution. Since we didn’t have real Gabriel to confirm it. :P But it’s ESPECIALLY sad that in 9x18 the horn is used to unite and gather angels together and… well, if we look to that episode, Cas calls an army to him with it much as he needs to get those supporters here.

I mean there is a lot that these two episodes do for each other just through this one linking “item”.

* * *

UGH the staging of this scene though, with Dean n Cas swapping places for the extreme sad close up. 

> CASTIEL  
> About your brother. I… I don’t know what’s wrong with him, but I do want to help. I’ll make inquiries. 

This is actually the truth, since Cas doesn’t know what he did to Sam and he earnestly doesn’t want anything to be wrong with Sam, and to make up for it if there IS something wrong with Sam, since if it’s connected to his resurrection then it’s Cas’s fault… So although we don’t have anything that makes Cas speak the truth, it’s nice that this return does have Cas dropping by and saying this.

However, considering this is pre-Dean-getting-truth-spelled, the fact is left open that Cas (if he would be affected at all - Sam isn’t) has been communicating him entirely outside of the influence of the truth spell. Going back to the 3 people Dean calls - Bobby and Lisa as well - Cas is the notable exception of the one who was not sort of… subpoenaed under that effect, and so it also marks him out as someone who could have lied to Dean and we wouldn’t know. Whether he really did or not doesn’t matter (he spoke mostly in concealments where nothing was technically a lie but the truth spell could have forced him to blurt MORE to fill in the gaps), because it puts Cas outside the group and therefore leaving a question open about what he  _might_  have said to Dean if only they met AFTER Dean invoked the spell.

* * *

Huh, the bar Dean’s at has the same dividers as the Biggerson’s but rearranged to get rid of the crosses in their negative space:

… I have to go check how they were arranged at Biggerson’s.

Nope, they were crosses there. Dean seems to be more in a cross _hair_  at this point.

* * *

*sighs because Snymelo’s humble origins feature Dean spending too much time looking at that lady’s breasts*

* * *

At least the Bobby x Tori thing became an extremely important plot point in season 10. 

* * *

> BOBBY  
> I never told anyone that. Why am I telling  _you?_  Maybe 'cause you’re my favorite. Although, Sam’s a better hunter. Lately, anyway. 

Based on their interactions over the years this is really not a surprise except that Bobby was forced to say it out loud. :P After all as recently as 5x21 he was used to express deep doubts in Sam’s ability basically as the mouthpiece for Dean so he didn’t have to say it and could keep a sort of neutral level of concern on the matter where he had plausible deniability that he just didn’t want Sam to die.

I’m more interested in the comment about Sam being a better hunter - obviously Dean’s been on a sort of rehabilitation to the job arc, and I think season 6 might mark the season the most crap happens to him? He often gets knocked around in fights but we’re only a few episodes in and he’s been poisoned, turned into a vampire and cursed… He’s not *completely* out of shape but he has a rocky start, and Sam’s an obvious contrast like this.

But anyway it’s interesting that Bobby here is expressing at least something with the “although” that links their worth with their ability as a hunter. Bobby knows Dean has been out of it and Sam’s been on the job and he was happy for Dean to stay out (or he’d probably have called him up as soon as Sam showed up :P) but there’s still some of those ingrained hunter values that stop Bobby from being this perfect ideal father figure but still a flawed man in his own ways, and that is that here he at least partially buys into the idea that skill as a hunter is a positive character trait that could be rewarded with extra love - an attitude often linked to John. 

Now, while I do think in the “if Bobby raised the boys” line of thought they might not have had SO much messed up crap, they’d still have been eventually raised as hunters, and there would still have ended up being their introduction to this hypermasculine culture and Bobby still has his hang ups etc. After all the secrets he splurges are that he indulges in some things which might seem unmanly, implying he conceals these interests as much as Dean would deny liking something girly. (In a way that little bit in season 7 where Dean and Bobby are talking about the soap opera they’ve got invested in while Dean has his broken leg is character development for the both of them, watching it together and in front of Sam. :P)

* * *

> BOBBY  
> Okay.But did you know my first girlfriend turned out to be a –
> 
> DEAN, hanging up emphatically.  
> No, no! Mnh-mnh. Mnh-mnh.

Same. I do not want to know how that was supposed to end. >.>

Let’s just say Dean was ending the call to preserve Bobby’s privacy.

* * *

Meanwhile Soulless Sam is doing the thing Dean normally does where he wordlessly offers a box of tissues to a crying person recounting recent tragedy.

* * *

So Dean’s reached out to Cas, without the truth, Bobby in a sort of neutral way where the truths were mostly played for fun, and accidentally (as in, without realising he was about to be hit with a truth spell) to Lisa earlier to get the *truly* unwanted truths of a call he was already anxious about and having trouble making.

(I do kind of like how so much of this episode takes place over the phone. Especially since this is a nice occasion when we have all the call participants there on screen. And Cas shows up in person for their random intruding conversation that does nothing for the episode except to make next episode Cas helping without explanation :P)

* * *

Lisa is wearing purple. Uhoh.

> LISA  
> You’ve got so much buried in there, and you push it down, and you push it down. Do you honestly think that you can go through life like that and  _not_  freak out? Just, what, drink half a fifth a night and you’re good? 

Oh Dean. :<

There’s been blue buildings in the background a couple of times around Dean - not always about Lisa? But in 6x02 and here definitely when it’s about Lisa.

Lisa’s accusation that he’d never be happy when Sam’s around is pretty painful but Dean spends soooo much time not happy… I mean this one is still kind of ongoing. :P

I wonder how much this “unhealthy tangled up” line gets thrown around in certain circles - I know Zachariah’s certain line about them get glorified sometimes but I’m not sure this one does just because Lisa links it so much to Dean’s happiness and since she’s speaking the plain truth as she understands it it’s a lament to Sam being in Dean’s life more than anything. I suppose this is the first moment properly prodding the good old codependency this side of Swan Song, and goes along with, in the narrative, Dean’s mounting concern about the need to fix Sam to emphasise that they have a history of doing things like selling souls and started apocalypses for each other, if nothing else to raise the stakes for this arc and remind us how desperate Dean can get when something is wrong with Sam - as something so obviously is at this point. 

His desperate measures end up not having collateral damage (well there’s a sort of neutral effect judgement about Death making Dean pick between Sam and Adam’s souls but it can’t be collateral beyond the loss that Adam already represented - which was to be sacrificed to the bigger fight maybe because of Dean picking Sam’s way in Point of No Return, but as an accident when they fully intended to rescue him, so Adam staying out of the story only is a sort of incidental blame?) and the end of season 6 and all of 7 don’t have them sacrificing for each other - it’s only Carver era which really starts messing with this in a huge way? But Gamble era was a lot about the emotional arcs and so there’s emotional set up to explore the idea of the negatives of the codependency if only in a hypothetical for now?

(Maybe it’s because I don’t ship them but I’m much less quick to jump on random happenings as part of the great bro bond so this is how I see things here - a sort of vague relief that nothing too big happens for the next stretch of seasons. :P That’s not to say that everything they do is particularly healthy for them long term, but they don’t do any of these big gestures to the greater harm of the world since it’s Cas’s “turn” to mess up and in the long run of Gamble era they’re generally more heroic in the sense that their main problems are usually the plot instead of each other :P)

* * *

Anyway Sam is investigating an acid green bedroom.

Because green is associated with him because he’s creepy.

There’s a red exit sign behind Dean though, small and in the background. Not sure if I’ve missed any lately but it’s only a mild warning right now, as Sam commits to an elaborate lie of putting on an emotional face and emphasising they’re brothers and blah blah blah of course I didn’t let you get turned into a vampire for fun.

(They would have such weird family arguments over Christmas dinner.)

Sam gets a “Sammy” for all his hard work mimicking human emotion.  

* * *

To reinforce that everything is normal again and Sam is back to being Sam, he is the one doing the nerdy research, on his separate personal laptop with the soulless black background.

* * *

It’s impossible to read the lore about Veritas because the website has black background with grey text. >.>

* * *

I quite like this motel’s mural.

* * *

Dean goes out and gets doughnuts while leaving Sam to watch it because he doesn’t sleep. Cut to Dean eating pizza so he did another take out run. Is Sam not eating either? 

He’s sort of immobile through the montage as Dean moves around being a restless normal human who needs to eat and get coffee. 

I mean it IS handy with him having no soul for some things?? I know Dean found him creepy but tbh it would be useful sometimes. :P

* * *

… I don’t want to know where Sam got the dog blood from either. Right now I really don’t trust him not to have actually killed a dog. Which, Sam being Sam, is the Ultimate Betrayal to himself.

* * *

Does Veritas have enough ominous red lighting in her house?

* * *

She does have a very nice set up for herself, complete with her shrine and museum pieces and private larder. I mean, as gods go, she definitely seems to be one of the better off?

And she dresses up really nicely. Best dressed goddess.

* * *

> VERITAS  
> I wouldn’t be so cocky if I were you, Dean. You know what happens when you base your life on lies, right? The truth comes along and… 

The truth is the worst thing this season. Do not want.

> DEAN  
> You’re covered in blood until you’re covered in your own blood. Half the time, you’re about to die. Like right now. I told myself I wanted out… that I wanted a  _family._
> 
> VERITAS  
> But you were lying.
> 
> DEAN  
> No. But what I’m good at… is slicing throats. I ain’t a father. I’m a killer. And there’s no changing that. I know that  _now._

I’m lying on the floor sobbing in a puddle of tears. 

He really genuinely wanted that family, sure, but ugh his realisation of why he thinks he can’t have it or all that he’s good for… Hello Purgatory Dean or Mark of Cain Dean :/

I’ll be over here nursing my sad Dean feels since Sam isn’t going to spill anything tragic right now.

It’s an unfair balance but the start of season 6 is ridiculously slanted towards the Dean!Girl and I mean. I’m not complaining. :P

* * *

Aah the old “goddess tells Sam something is horrifically wrong with him” thing. Love that one.

(Does it happen elsewhere than here and 9x08?)

(Something’s always wrong with Sam but I can’t think of an instance.)

* * *

Aw no they ruined her dress stabbing her.

* * *

> DEAN, backing SAM around the basin.  
> You are  _not_  my brother. 

Saaame old. :P

* * *

Awww Soulless Sam. Sam’s such a good person I do think his moral codes are ingrained in his thoughts a certain amount way beyond his soul. He might not feel it, but he at least seems to know when there’s something wrong (”it should stop me cold”) and I don’t think there’s anything particularly conniving about hoping to stop Dean hurting him when he says he needs help. It’s that same sort of odd morality that makes him stop Dean from killing Crowley because they made a deal, or his sense that he is a good hunter and at least knowing objectively that their job was a good heroic thing so somehow he has decided to follow these basic rules outside of emotionally based morality. He might not care about saving people but I suppose this would really be the time he’s most like Dean in one way even if Dean was wrong that Sam was broken and acting like him a moment before this - just recently there was some discussion popping up again about Dean as a weapon: <http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131043975308/weapons-and-dean-winchester> but right here Sam’s body is sort of wandering around with this basic programming of what they do ingrained in him. All that’s left of Sam is this instinct to follow the old patterns of their life and he knows he’s objectively good at it so clearly, logically, this is the right thing for him to be doing… (See also: my comments about Bobby saying “you’re my favourite although Sam’s a better hunter.”)

And later as Dean sort of… navigates having Soulless Sam as a partner in the next episodes, and like how Sam tried to talk him into joining him in 6x01, he sees a value in Dean as a good hunter as well - for other reasons like having emotional intuition, which actually gives us a positive contrast of this time when Dean ISN’T necessarily the blunt little instrument, despite what he says about himself just being a killer right here. In the endless contrasting of Sam and Dean, Dean comes out kind of on top for his normal themes here, just by being put up against the guy with no soul. 

Anyway, I think what this is all leading back to is when Sam asks for help here, he’s got a lot of inherent codes and an idea that there is another side to being a hunter than just what he does, which at this point is ruthlessly track and kill things, and Dean offers it. Even before he actively sort of appoints himself as Sam’s conscience over the next couple of episodes (Empathy, Sam!) Sam is recognising that if Dean is really THAT creeped out by him and his own different set of hunter instincts that Sam recognises as a valuable part of the team are telling him something is wrong with Sam - and Sam suspecting he is a monster while in a mode programmed just to hunt and kill monsters - means that he can very validly logic his way around to asking for help based off a little of old Sam left behind in his thought patterns and some respecting what Dean brings to the table in an objective way (he does say he really doesn’t care about Dean at some point later while being brutally honest :P) and for him to actually mean it?

I dunno, obviously I like Sam as his normal self a hell of a lot better, but Soulless Sam is interesting for more than just the occasional sass.

* * *

But right now he gets beat unconscious. Yikes, Dean. Pent up rage and fear spilling over much? I guess he still thinks there’s a serious chance this isn’t any sort of Sam at all especially since Veritas reacted so strongly to him being not-human which is different from human-with-no-soul, so Dean is kind of reacting more to the idea of a monster or something stealing Sam’s skin… Hurting Sam being a rage button which then in this case turns around to hurting the thing that hurt Sam by… hurting Sam?

There’s all sorts of problematic crap in this episode despite how it’s pretty fun to watch. *lowers volume on brain* >.>

…

But Cas was pretty OK for those 3 minutes! :P And now this is his problem again for a few minutes next episode! \o/ *scavenges up my minutes of Cas because I have no shame*


	7. 6x07

This episode is pretty much just pasting some more plot into season 6?

It says written by Dabb on the tin so I’m mostly here to stare very hard at all the driving, since this rewatch immediately follows on from 11x02 airing so old grievances have arisen.

(Well it’s Dabbflin, but the car problems seem weirdly focussed on Dabb in later seasons, and also appear in Dabbflin episodes so clearly Loflin was not good at asking Dabb where he was driving everyone.)

* * *

Joking (”joking”) about my Dabb car vendetta aside, I feel vaguely bad for him & Loflin re: this episode because I literally can’t remember anything interesting about it aside from the Cas stuff in the first 10 minutes, and I feel that the main problem with this strand of the season - and the problem with season 6 overall - is expressed in the title itself - “Family Matters”, which is already ironic just on the quick analysis of the episode. I’m pretty sure this is where Dean finds out they’ve been stealing alphas and blah blah shouldn’t have trusted the Campbells, etc so it’s both “Family Matters” in the sense that this is something the family is doing - it’s another way of saying “family business” in the sense of “mind your own business”… and of course, it’s a phrase all by itself to say that family is important - kind of the most important theme. :P Except that here we’re finding out that the Campbells are working to a different kind of family business that is shady as hell and there’s a weird business relationship with them that Sam has had so they don’t matter to him, and they’re busy failing all of Dean’s rules of “family don’t end with blood - but it doesn’t start there either” which is something he really probably learns hard for the first time with these guys no matter how you might apply it other ways…

Anyway, because the Campbells and Sam were always more of a thing, and everything happens off screen, and there’s so little contact with them because they’re being shady as hell from the start and so on and so on, they’re COMPLETELY impersonal to Dean, who is our sole emotional POV character for basically the entire season until Sam is back to offer some occasional help with holding up the narrative (minus the Bobby and Cas episodes bookending the season). And because this storyline with the Campbells has them being shady and impersonal to Dean from the start, and because their story has been mostly light contact with him, secrets, and Soulless Sam interaction, and he’s historically had issues with Samuel (who we never know if he actively remembers 4x03) and manages to piss him off a second time regardless, this entire thing is happening at a huge remove. I seem to remember this is the episode where they catch the alpha vampire? And some random side characters die in the attempt maybe? It literally doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter in Caged Heat when they reveal some of the others were demons and kill them off, and even in … that khan worm episode, when they kill Gwen, we just haven’t got to know her enough and Samuel’s basically a secondary antagonist in Caged Heat and that other episode. So “Family Matters” is a hilariously inaccurate statement when it comes to the Campbells and this episode exposes it.

* * *

Anyway, first we get a few minutes of Cas. :P

Doctor!Cas! Diagnosing Sam. :D

Oh hey we’re back in the motel room from 6x06 so we literally haven’t moved except that Dean dragged unconscious Sam back here. I hope that didn’t look too awkward. 

Sam looks so nervous of Cas taking off his belt in front of him.  _What does this diagnosis require Cas_?

(Also I mean we had the whole montage in the previous episode of Sam being a single minded sleepless researcher… Should Dean be THAT surprised he’s not sleeping? A single all-nighter should show him Sam’s not acting like he’s doing an all-nighter :P)

* * *

> Castiel: Sam… What are you feeling now?
> 
> Sam: [scoffs] I feel like my nose is broken.
> 
> Castiel: No, that’s a physical sensation. How do you feel?
> 
> Sam: Well, I think –
> 
> Castiel: Feel.
> 
> Sam: I… don’t know.

:< 

Poor Sam. 

I do like that it’s Cas asking after last episode - “you used to be human, or like one.” “certain regrettable things.. blah blah” there’s a parallel between Cas and Soulless!Sam especially with the emphasis on how soulless people aren’t human - that’s what missing is what MAKES them human. *makes the VCR fast forward squeaky noises to Cas thinking Crowley is trying to make a deal for his soul in 6x20 and points out he’s an angel and doesn’t have one*

Not… that that means Cas isn’t secretly an emotional wreck this season who’s busy getting into ridiculous trouble because he cares too much. 

* * *

Anyway while I’m still on the whole 11x02 thing, look Sam with the glowy red veiny things again because why not :P

This is an almost weekly occurrence for him.

Interesting to wonder about where these veins are following when they crawl all over various characters - in this case I suppose this is Cas’s power in Sam feeling out inside him what’s going on, or some pathway in Sam lighting up in response to the intrusion… Since he has no soul to light up. Things like the Mark of Cain crawling from Cain up Dean’s arm followed a similar nonsense pathway, and those black veins that appear from time to time on people - Sam with demon blood/Darkness infection, Cas with Leviathans, Dean with Djinn nightmares so far as I have been counting - all just follow similar patterns of art department dramatic veins. Similar random patterns for Cas taking on Sam’s hell visions as well… Anyway, they really never look like they’re meant to line up with circulatory system stuff so I always wonder if they’re following some other sort of mystical pathway inside the body. All these various infections and moments of random glowy or dark shit inside them are just metaphorically represented by their path through the body. 

This is a really sleepy brain thought. :P

* * *

> Castiel: Somehow, when Sam was resurrected, it was without his soul. 

““““somehow”””” 

* * *

> Dean: So, is he even still Sam?
> 
> Castiel: Well, you pose an interesting philosophical question.

Always amused by how asking Cas tough questions either gets him suggesting that he could explain it with horrendous maths, or just musing on the fact that philosophers could spend all year on it and not come up with an answer. :P

I like to think that when he was watching over earth he’d occasionally pay attention to philosophers talking about religion. Kind of in a half smug half curious way depending on what they were talking about and how right they were. 

* * *

[undisclosed amount of unimportant driving time]

* * *

Huh, Cas is appearing with the caged halo adjacent to him in both angles so far, but look who has a halo:

Dean is trapped in this season’s narrative with the whole start of the season pretty much just  _happening_  to him (which is an adjacent problem to the whole “this entire plotline is a background thing” re: the Campbells for making this season completely disassociated from its own plot and probably why I struggle to remember what happens in the whole first half - once Sam has his soul back I can normally track a reasonably clear line through the season without looking it up. Before the re-watch and actually checking episodes and collecting gifs and stuff I’ve have vaguely said, “Um. Djinn, baby, Cas comes back, something something something fairies something TESSA” to summarise the opening :P) - I think the first thing Dean really actually  _does_  to become proactive is in Appointment in Samarra. 

Even his choice to go hunt again is A: first forced by 2 random incursions in the first 2 episodes, and then between Lisa’s support and a lot of discussion of his own nature etc he’s semi pushed back into the job just by the fact that after a point it feels to him and Lisa that he can’t  _not_. And then more stuff happens and happens TO him… Anyway, Dean n Cas are the only ones currently with emotional heft on the story since Samuel is just that guy in the corner (and as I rambled at the top, quickly falling from favour), and Sam’s got no input and I think that might end up being something Dean basically says at some point in this episode to Sam? Anyway, the conversation with Dean n Cas about Soulless Sam does sort of frame them as parents talking about their kid and have them huddling off in one corner and peering over at Sam as they talk to each other and Sam interjecting from his much removed position… If Cas were directly under a halo light it could suggest this even footing that they seemed to be on in that conversation, but combined with him sucking at meeting Dean’s eye to start with and now having them not highlighted as equal moral beacons in these uncertain times, you have Cas slightly out of alignment from how those halo lights used to always show up over his head…

The thing with this season ALSO is that by putting so much on Dean as its sole “reliable” protagonist, Dean’s actions are all kind of held up as him being the moral beacon through this all and while he’s not a bad guy he can make sketchy or selfish decisions, but his role in this season holds him up high enough that it can be maybe too forgiving? I LOVE Dean and I still think some things he says or does should be held critically this season but it takes dipping into Bobby’s viewpoint in 6x04 to give us another “side”… Sort of shows they’re aware of the problem with the POV here, but anyway. I think that may be WHY I’ve seen Dean critical people being especially harsh about his treatment of Soulless Sam and decision in Appointment in Samarra -  _because_  the narrative holds him up through this all without enough questioning and Dean keeps on being proved right, or at least, to be less wrong, or the voice of humanity in a room of people with compromised morality. And so the reaction against him if you are more critical of Dean, is to question this. I dunno, even watching from my favourable viewpoint of giddy glee where starting every sentence “Dean…” while discussing the season, I see there’s a flaw in this approach. :P

* * *

*Cas continues sticking his hand in everyone called Samuel* 

* * *

Was Christian the one possessed by a demon? Maybe he’s just a bit stunned by everything but he doesn’t seem to care about Cas being there and Dean saying “angel”. Even Samuel gives Cas a careful once over before talking to him. Christian doesn’t seem at all surprised even if they all knew that Sam had once chillaxed with an angel back in the day.

* * *

> Samuel: No, but I… I knew it was something. I… You’re a hell of a hunter, Sam, but… the truth is, sometimes you scare me. 

Again with complementing him as a hunter, but this time with the amendment that’s been going kind of unspoken. Samuel’s had the most contact with soulless!Sam although no idea how he’s supposed to act as normal Sam… After all the emphasis on how good a hunter Sam has been I felt the need to mention this one too.

Samuel admits he knew there was something dodgy about Sam but never made appropriate inquiries (although there appears to be no test that people are missing their souls without angel fisting?) But it does help to build up the idea of him being shady that he went along with it - once again we have someone praising Sam for being “a hell of a hunter”, like Bobby last episode. The more I think about this the more surprised I get that I’ve never seen a meta comparing Soulless!Sam to Dean in general with the whole blunt little instrument thing, where we suddenly get everyone praising Sam for being so good, and using him. Even Dean, sentimental to the meatsuit maybe, is taking him on hunts ~like normal~ but essentially taking advantage of the fact that Soulless!Sam defaults to wanting to hunt and while others are praising him for how good he is at singlemindedly doing that, he in return is clearly giving other hunters his (blind) approval for what they do, clearly showing that being a hunter is a default state in his operating system as he expresses enough about his lack of sentiment that I’ve never bought into the general fandom jokes about how cute he behaved or relatively nice he was because he just… doesn’t have those values in him? I feel, like Dean is doing through this part, the fandom is projecting old Sam values onto him and seeing stuff that’s not actually in there. :P

I don’t know where I was going with this - I guess showing that Samuel is the no.1 exploiter of Sam’s willingness to hunt and no matter how unnerved he may have got at times he kept on using Sam, especially enjoying how he didn’t ask questions or follow up that missing instinct on what seemed sketchy.

* * *

> Dean: You better tear the attic up, find something to help Sam.
> 
> Castiel: Of course. Your problems always come first. I’ll be in touch.

Cas is so sarcastic. :3 My child.

Add it to the pile of asking so much of Cas… You know, after Weekend at Bobby’s, I sort of feel like that should have been the very very early warning for them about this - that it foreshadows how MUCH they’re going to ask Cas for. Bobby n Cas are literally the support characters for Sam and Dean in that they prop them up and help them… 6x04 from Bobby’s POV explores that same obligation to, yet life outside of, the Winchesters as 6x20 does for Cas. Basically, if Dean had realised that Bobby’s angry rant was a general wake up call, he could have started asking concerned questions of Cas much earlier? It didn’t seem like there was much he could do but… yeah. :P I’m going to continue paralleling 6x04 and 6x20 all season I think. :P

* * *

I like all the random scenic shots of empty spaces to show when Cas  _isn’t_  there any more.

(I’m not saying I dislike his face just that the fact they always showed it makes me laugh because Cas managed to teleport with sarcasm in a way that no one else ever manages, except maybe a few early Ruby moments.)

* * *

There is a ridiculous amount of back and forth about trust until we get to 

> Sam: Just…You. Saying you don’t trust family. 

~theeemes~

This is where the proper ironic definition of the title as they’d have wanted you to interpret it comes into the episode anyway.

* * *

I am fairly certain that Dean stole Christian’s coffee in a weird dominance display.

Earlier:

Now:

  


I am genuinely stumped for interpretation except that perhaps that’s a standard issue mug there in the compound, or Dean is being a huge dick to Christian because he has already long decided that the guy’s a douche and douches don’t get to remember where they put their coffee cup.

For all we know he was actually just backwashing into the mug :P

* * *

*Dean goes sneaking down yet another dark corridor*

Because ~theeeemes~ I guess. I don’t think this is a particularly descent-y season for Dean, but the opening has certainly played with that.

(I may or may not be giffing every time he walks down a dark corridor and momentarily becomes faceless in the shadows at this point since I have 2 other instances already saved on my computer. :P)

Anyway for Dean the starkest visual reminder going on with that fan in the background is to 4x16 because while he was torturing Alastair there was a very prominent similar fan in the background. Considering we know from early in the season that Sam casually told Dean’s tragic backstory to the Campbells because he has no filter on what not to share that this plays an element in the trouble he has with integrating with them - the ones who are possessed by demons don’t like him because Dean; the ones who are human are judging him for a huge number of factors.

See also:

> Christian: Who you calling?
> 
> Dean: Your wife. Let her know I’m not gonna make it over tonight.
> 
> Christian: You know, I’ve tried playing nice, Dean, but I think I’m done.
> 
> Dean: Wait, are you trying to tell me that you’re a bigger knob than you’ve been letting on?
> 
> Christian: I’m the guy who’s been here, doing my job. Who are you? You think we need you here? You walk around like you’re playing pro tennis. Only action you seen lately is between your slut girlfriend’s legs.
> 
> [angry macho posturing (*Lizzy captions* :P)]

> Christian: You sure you want to come with us tomorrow? Accidents happen.
> 
> Dean: Hmm. Don’t worry, man. I got your back.

Again with the whole getting up in someone’s face etc - since 4x16′s already been whispered about in the subtext of what you might be recalling about Dean through these interactions, that’s not an insignificant bit of framing.

* * *

Dabb plays it really risky by showing a whole convoy of cars and trucks leaving the compound than arriving at the alpha vamp place. Theoretically at this point in the episode’s plot there is no need to know where they are or how far away they are from anything.

I have to assume this 1 second shot of a single car all on its own is just randomly there, and not meant to summarise the entire convoy so this is really just scene setting to say “we’re in the countryside now, look, red barn.”

* * *

*Sam offers the least reassuring “it’s fine” ever*

And we get some Gwen stuff! Finally :P She’s already ribbed on Dean before in front of the others, now she calls him a reject in front of the party right after Dean tries to shrug off being told to hang back and behave like he’s going along with orders, but Gwen makes a point of complaining because I guess she’s busy being a woman in a really macho work environment, so she has to assert herself and play as one of the guys. (I’m always gratified they didn’t try foisting the shapeshifter baby on her just because she was a woman in 6x02 though.)

Anyway, as soon as they’re alone we get Gwen apologising for the face she has to keep in front of them, and explains that she gets left behind a lot (which helps silently explain she may not be as in deep with the whole working for Crowley thing as some others). Dean’s being quietly feminised again by the Campbells (which, incidentally, I forgot to mention with the vampire cure in 6x05 did similar as the old Campbell recipe had been apparently exclusively tested on helpless female vampire victims) by putting him in the same place as the girl who’s made to hang back for her own safety… Considering part of Gwen jabbing at him in 6x01 was her feminising him in turn in 2 separate incidents, there’s a real picture of how she struggles and lashes out. Which AGAIN is how Dean often lashes out especially pre-emptively, so it’s sort of feminising his defence mechanism at the exact same time as attacking him for it?? Layers. :P

 (See also: the “Your wife” comment from a few minutes ago. Dean alone with a menacing guy immediately goes full hetero in defence… and that’s his  _cousin_  :P)

* * *

“reminds him of his daughter” Gwen says while having flawless swooshy hair out on a hunt.

I wonder what would happen if anyone ever told the SPN costume department about hairties.

* * *

*Dean flashbacks to the weird vamp vision montage from a few episodes ago* He nearly got a ton of vamp blood in his mouth again when Gwen killed the one that jumped them - you’d be forgiven for thinking he got turned again a little. :P (Dean being the damsel in distress that needs saving - lol. I did say somewhere earlier in this rewatch that season 6 is Dean’s probably most incompetent season as well as the most passive…)

Loads of random hunters die but we have no connection to them and despite Dean’s anxiety that the hunt turned bad, he doesn’t have a “Aaaah Saaaaaaam” moment or anything and all the major characters emerge unscathed. It adds to the disconnected feeling that all these dead hunters - even the one who called “Dean!” when she saw him - are basically no one to us, and the same to Dean (and obviously Sam.)

Like, this was not a high-stakes mission (oh god sorry that would be a terrible pun if we were watching Buffy and they raided a house with a dozen vamps :P) for the viewer, only for the random hunters we never got names for. Samuel seems to have been using them for cannon fodder ever, to create the distraction to grab the alpha, which is a much more careful process, requiring his most skilled inner circle - the kind of good hunters who could yawn their way through those random mook vampires. 

Which means that what just took place was entirely for the sense of future plot mystery and suspense, and nothing to do with the action…

* * *

Sam and Dean driving back appear to have ditched the rest of the convoy for their trip, with no explanation for why they are taking a different route despite the fact they all left together without Dean saying a word to Samuel about detouring, so he’s clearly taken a highly suspicious turn onto a side road or dropped the convoy or something…

What I am saying is… There’s unexplained Car Dynamics.

Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabbbbbbbb

* * *

Quick lesson in programming:

> Dean: And why? And did it ever occur to you that this is really shady?
> 
> Sam: He’s our grandfather.

There’s no way Sam is emotionally attached to Samuel, obviously, but the underlying loyalty to family thing is ALSO an emotional response. He’s literally gone along with this because of all the mantras about family that they lived their lives by, trying to work out what he is “supposed” to do. I don’t think they ever tell us how Sam and Samuel met up (? Crowley arranged a date via secret contrivances? Just… told Samuel where to find Sam?) Anyway I guess Sam on hearing they were family just sort of decided “well obviously I have been told family is important a zillion times… Family  _matters_ ” (lol) and so that’s how we get here.

Also: again, like with season 4, the last time Something Was Wrong With Sam, Sam under-valuing Dean’s abilities, and in this case there’s a weird thing here with Sam and Samuel feeling like Dean won’t obey orders, and Sam in particular seems to be handing out the character references for Dean to the Campbells… Just funny because Dean originally was the one who always obeyed what John said, and so I can’t help feeling if this is coming from deep in Sam rather than stuff in canon - a memory of the frustration of Dean not listening to Sam himself translated dispassionately to a character reference, or feeling like Dean is always making the decisions and would therefore be bad at following orders… I dunno, I know Dean is bad at bending the knee, but Cas also had that line in 4x15 about “whatever I say you do the exact opposite…” and I gave that line funny looks there, breaking down what Cas had  _actually_  asked him to do so far in canon and how Dean had actually done it all or tried to the best of his ability when he knew what was actually being asked of him… I’m doubting this character reading and maybe it’s just me being inclined towards Dean and therefore more forgiving but I see some differences between the times he leads and the times he obeys orders and the times when none of the above apply. There HAVE been plenty of times when he’s been controlling towards what Sam can do especially when things are bad and he doesn’t trust Sam - and he’s going to take on a much more controlling aspect over soulless!Sam now he knows the deal - but I do feel like I’m missing something any time anyone tells Dean he’s not good at taking orders, because, defying dick angels (not Cas) aside the only time orders have really ever been a Thing has been with John way back when and Dean jumped to it. So this seems much more like an accidental insight into Sam’s  _feelings_  about Dean, as with many of the things Soulless!Sam casually blurts that Sam would never have said.

* * *

> Dean: I’m not kidding, man. Nobody’s forcing you to work with me, okay? But if we do this… I drive the bus, I call the shots, and you tell me everything, whether you think it’s important or not, because – trust me – you can’t tell the difference. 

Like that. :P

* * *

*comments on the general existence of more orange everywhere, more caged lights everywhere, and the vague sense that this warehouse district feels vaguely like the place in 2x20 from the outside except obviously not the same one inside.*

* * *

*sound of plot being crammed into the season with the alpha vamp stuff*

*without saying Purgatory yet*

Dean’s leaning against a reddish orange “DANGER” sign.

This guy was kind of cool until they made him much more creepy and paedophilic in season 7. I mean I guess there were some weird little girl vampires in the vision but it wasn’t particularly overt. And it was more about him keeping human children to feed off than the creepy vampire children later.

Anyway. This dialogue is a little OTT dramatic but it gets across some plot points because they kind of need to introduce SOME sort of direction for everything what with us being nearly a third of the way through the season :P

All they really do is ask questions that aren’t answered properly, and then aren’t given their proper due in the actual unfolding of the plot. It’s especially frustrating once you know the full plot of the season and how unimportant most of this is :P

I do like this bit though:

> Dean: I didn’t realize we were on a first-name basis.
> 
> Alpha Vampire: Of course we are. After all, you were my child… for a time. Dean, tell me… did you enjoy it?

The alpha asking him if he  _enjoyed_  it is very interesting considering it was Dean’s first real brush with being the monster after getting through pretty unscathed for 5 seasons while Sam had those arcs. This question does feel like the first time he’s challenged about if he liked being a monster, unless I’m missing something? Season 3 had him in fear of becoming one, and season 4 coping with feeling like he’d been monstrous in Hell (and again this episode did have callbacks to 4x16 so it could just be like that, trying to recreate unsuccessfully the electricity of the Dean vs Alastair stuff…) Anyway they’re pretty much just saying random exposition things back and forth through these bars.

This really only seems  _so_  much more pertinent in hindsight of season 8, 9 and 10 for one reason or another, and probably 11 soon as well. 

Weird family themes here too - the alpha calling Dean a son of his, and of course the first mention of Eve as a generic “mother”. Eve being mother of all doesn’t become their grandma by extrapolating from this but also takes on a role as their mother, so this is sort of even more messed up in hindsight. :P

* * *

> Alpha Vampire: I’m trying to answer the question. Now, when we “freaks” die… where do we go? Not heaven, not hell. So?
> 
> Dean: Legoland?

I still kind of feel like they should have gone to Legoland at the end of season 7. What a nice holiday for Dean n Cas. :3

* * *

> Alpha Vampire: He doesn’t care. He does as he is told.
> 
> Dean: Well, if the old man’s Kermit… whose hand’s up his ass?

This also could have been more dramatic if they didn’t reveal this this very episode and maybe had ANY investigation or something. :P But plot pasting needs to happen and so it all has to unfold this episode, and with all the longer stuff at the start, there’s 10 minutes left for this part of the story to happen in.

* * *

> Alpha Vampire: The boy with no soul. I’ve got big plans for you. It’s amazing how that pesky, little soul gets in the way. But not for you. You will be the perfect… animal. 

Well that also didn’t go anywhere, did it? :P It also didn’t make much sense in the themes of the season being about souls - and monster souls too. Which he was just talking about so that theme is already established… Perhaps that was just scientific curiosity on his part, to see what Sam would turn into. Possibly it would have just been pure hunger, since vampires have always been at the very least a mimicry of human society in a way all the other monsters, who tend to be solitary, aren’t. And it’s vampires we most often see being conscientious and making the decision not to kill, and who are the most reversible and so given a chance to deny that nature and turn human again - as later we also know demons are reversible back into human souls. I guess in the show’s lore vampires are the best “example” monster for a lot of stuff which is why they come up quite often. No other monster has a cure, not many we’ve seen have social structures (most that do are just sibling or other family groups for obvious parallel story reasons). I dunno, it’s a good argument that the human soul, corrupted, still has some sway on a monster in a way that it’s disingenuous to compare them to completely soulless creatures. We’ve been seeing good monsters here and there for a while, and there’s much more focus on them to come. Werewolves from the original version of the show’s lore might not even know they’re monsters and don’t seem to become more monstrous in daily life away from full moons… The later werewolves are a bit more in control and aware they’re monsters and can exploit their transformation rather than live in passive dread of it, so they also get posed the morality issue on how they live their lives and the idea of being a monster or not is more inherent to their hourly choices.

I guess this is the shifting of the themes, when season 6 starts to try and come up with a more cohesive lore for monsters to tie them all together into one umbrella and with the alphas give them some structure, and with Eve some mythos that extends outside each monster’s individual lore as written by scared humans and hunters recording the info needed to kill them.

* * *

Oh anyway Christian was a demon and Crowley was behind everything.

*surprise*

* * *

Bobby never told them Crowley was the King of Hell. Wow. :P

(I actually went and checked the recap at the start of this episode and the transcript for 6x04 and it seems like they really haven’t had this conversation and there was no reminder for it because that would be spoilers for his involvement, so it appears that Bobby just casually forgot to update them on Crowley’s new job because it wasn’t important. Well done, Bobby.)

* * *

Crowley takes full credit for bringing Sam  _and_  Samuel back and suggests he has the mojo to get stuff out of the Cage. Later we learn Cas did that part at least, so Crowley is mooching off this since Cas won’t exactly admit to it…

(Or Crowley isn’t lying because the writers don’t know this twist yet. I don’t trust season 6, no matter how sketchy they make Cas early on :P)

Anyway I always wondered that Samuel was in Hell not Heaven because otherwise Cas would have been much more in the position to grab him? Did Cas not resurrect both of them? 6x20 seriously suggests Crowley was the one who had Samuel as an ace up his sleeve, so he appears to have been down in Hell all of his own doing. I am intrigued by what we don’t know about him as we never see him make a deal, so he must just be a worse person. 

* * *

> Dean: So, what’s so important that you’re the king of hell’s cabana boy, huh? What’d he offer you? Girls? Money? Hair? 

I shouldn’t laugh. But to be fair to Samuel he kind of eventually wins this argument big-time if he were around to see season 9-10 :P

This whole confrontation has a vague call-forward to 6x20 anyway, just because it’s a ZOMG you were working with Crowley thing. Waaaaaay less emotionally charged, and they let Samuel walk off and they stay behind, rather than walk off and leave him, which totally changes the emotional direction. Sam also just like, nearly shoots him then and there, and he’s technically the injured party here, since Dean’s whole thing is stumbling in late to the party and actually starting to ask awkward questions about what the hell type of party it was.

* * *

> Dean: We can’t work for Crowley.
> 
> Sam: Are you sure about that?
> 
> Dean: I don’t think you understand. Demons bone you every time.

Godddddd. Dean, season 6 you is rolling his eyes so hard at season 10 you.

* * *

It’s probably not symbolic that they’re having all this conversation about being trapped working for Crowley in front of a cage. ~symbolism~

I am amused and sad that this conversation was like 90% discussion of when and how to murder Crowley considering the ongoing lack of pay-off. I’m awarding them both a half point for this.

(Sam: 3.5, Dean 1.5 Actual Attempts/Plans to Kill Crowley.)

* * *

(thinking of attempts to kill, was it Sam who shot Samuel in the end? I have a vague feeling it was, although that’s from an other episode I barely remember the main action beats of :P Anyway he kind of promises to do it here, with an actual attempt to kill Samuel, stopped by Dean in much the same way Sam stopped him killing Crowley not too long ago. They really are terrible at killing people. :P)

* * *

… Oh no, it’s not the dog episode next, is it? :/


	8. 6x08

The other dog episode.

…

Why does the show have multiple episodes where you can go “Oh it’s the weird dog episode.”

In this one, dog pervs on people instead of person pervs on dog. \o/

* * *

Hang on are there  _no_  werewolves in season 6, the monster season?

Maybe they had no idea what to do with the lore they had even with the restrictions they lifted on monsters this season, until later they just got bored of dealing with working out how to not do Heart again and retconned it all to easier lore. :P

* * *

Wow that is a terrible cold open. 

Like 3 seconds long though, thankfully.

I assume the guy talking on the phone was talking about a dog and not a child:

> MAN (on phone)  
> Did he eat? You gave him a bath, right? Well, did you take him to the park?
> 
> MAN (on phone)  
> And did he make pee-pee and poo-poo? Good. Tell him Daddy loves him. Be home soon.

I have no memory of how he fits into all this. Considering the dogs turn out to be were-dogs it’s all a little creepy with the way humans talk about them though. Ugh. My skin is already crawling and I’ve never even owned a dog. :P 

* * *

Episode highlight:

* * *

Crowley pops up and ruins everything. I’m not entirely sure what Sam and Dean were doing out here in the first place aside from getting ribs. Dean’s busy badgering Bobby on the phone for help against Crowley, whilst assuming that he and Sam can chill and eat ribs together like brothers… Everything is running smoothly with plenty of denial. :P

One thing I will say is that using the main plot to send them on completely random MotW plots is always something I appreciate? Season 6 has so much to complain about but within its own rules this is sort of one of the better parts of it, structurally. It is working with the format they’re stuck with in a way that Carver Era or even season 7 sometimes struggle to really reconcile totally random MotW with main plot. So far there has been a good reason for everything that’s happened.

Also means random Crowley cameo in the opening of what pans out as an average MotW to send them there. Like, imagine if Cas was in every episode but just to tell them where to go hunt monsters. Waving them off from the bunker door before going back to do some nerdy Cas thing as a stay-at-home angel. *nods* 

* * *

> SAM  
> Werewolf.
> 
> DEAN  
> No, it’s not a full moon.
> 
> CROWLEY  
> Werewolves turning on the full moon – so ‘09.
> 
> SAM  
> He’s right. Samuel and I ganked one about six months back on the half-moon. Things have been out of whack for a while now, I guess.

I’m guessing along with the vampire army teased a few times in the opening that the general monster disruption could have gone more places but ended up just being a vague “Eve is unhappy” thing that wasn’t even utilised that much when Eve was up and running. 

Still, as far as we know the universe was just left vaguely out of whack after this season? It doesn’t explain all the changes in werewolf lore (I don’t know if there was an explanation until season 8 in Bitten when Robbie came up with some better rules?) 

* * *

> DEAN  
> Crowley. He’s so far up our asses we’re – we’re – we’re coughing sulfur, 

I hope that isn’t an actual thing.

* * *

Soulless Sam claims that he is still Sam - still likes the same music. Which makes me do a fast re-wind to Sam’s Murder Revenge Playlist of Doom from hunting Lilith back over the season 3-4 gap.

* * *

I am wondering about soulless people liking music though. You’d think that would be one thing that definitely comes from the soul. Anyway, this comes right after Crowley says Sam would sell Dean for a dollar if he needed a soda more, and Sam says here he’s still Dean’s brother, and I seem to recall the end of this episode is Sam says he really don’t care for Dean just like Crowley implied, so this may be a defence mechanism with Sam trying to build up a fake impression of being old Sam to Dean to keep them working together, because obviously Sam isn’t actually feeling nostalgic to Dean, but he would see that being able to continue working with Dean (when Dean is trying hard to still see his brother in there) he needs to act a certain way to make Dean see what he used to see and so this is some straight up telling not showing to try and bridge that gap.

As far as I recall a certain episode coming up immediately after this plays with a very different side to Sam once he sort of stops pretending to care and just relaxes into being soulless. :P

* * *

> SAM  
> Oh, we’re specialists. They call us in to answer the questions of mouth-breathing dick monkeys.

… Sam is something else right now. Maybe he’s frustrated with being nice for Dean when it’s a lot of effect to conjure up what “nice” is supposed to look like. :P

* * *

My entire screen was briefly orange:

Seems Dean is still being powerfully associated with this colour this season when he’s on his own.

* * *

Especially since there’s an emphasis on Sam not sleeping so not using the other orange bed so disassociating it from Sam.

* * *

*counts one beer bottle next to Dean’s bed*

* * *

Hi Lucky. You were cute until you were creepy. :P

I am still unnerved by how Lucky and the other dog from the dog episode was a German Shephard. I suppose because they’re easy to do TV with? I remain suspicious about the other dog episode.

* * *

That Cal guy that’s the first false lead is made out to be an alcoholic who was drinking heavily the night before - Dean only had the one drink and he doesn’t really begin the proper alcoholism descent for a little while because season 7 is a deep pit of despair in comparison, but aside from the bit where he stole Christian’s coffee last episode he’s been shown drinking alcohol pretty much all season very consistently… Hm.

> CAL  
> Yeah, I thought that was some kind of animal attack.
> 
> SAM  
> No love lost between the two of you, huh?
> 
> CAL  
> Look, we had our differences, I guess. You love your brother, of course, but… Ron had a lot of problems. He was, uh, volatile.
> 
> SAM  
> Last time he was here, you called the cops?
> 
> CAL  
> Yeah, look, he came in here all messed up, and he was yelling. He shoved Mandy. So, yeah, I called the cops. I don’t see how that has to do with –

Gasp brothers who don’t get on and this one doesn’t even care the other’s dead :P

Except each brother seems pretty bad and both are on Lucky’s hit list so…

Anyway the whole showing up messed up and shoving someone is exactly what vamp!Dean did to Ben and Lisa, so I’m just pointing that out. And Mandy and her kid are a single mother with a son + a useless boyfriend which also makes them a Ben & Lisa + Dean parallel.

I guess now the break up has happened, emphasising all the bad elements at work there in extreme hyperbole, to get the message across.

* * *

There’s some good random Impala porn shots here wasting screen time with lingering shots of her lights or wheels. Who directed this?

Hah, Phil Sgriccia. Okay. I got your measure, mate.

* * *

It took 12 minutes for this episode to get super weird. 

14 for

> MANDY  
> You are the only decent boyfriend I have ever had. 

and Lucky watching her get in the shower. Ick. :P I’m SO GLAD that the end of the episode did what it did with her and Lucky and made a huge conscious effort to stress the creep factor was too much here. Because ick. 

But first you have to survive 20 minutes of this. >.>

* * *

> SAM  
> I mean, Mandy is right at the deep end of the vic pool. Can you do it?
> 
> DEAN  
> Do what?
> 
> SAM  
> Shove her in the trunk, serve her up to Crowley.
> 
> DEAN  
> Yeah, Sam, I can do it.

Gah, Dean making moral compromises for Sam. >.> And there’s no alternate POV on this - this is sort of what I meant last episode about Dean being the emotional POV for this part of the season. We can tell he doesn’t like it, but he agrees to do it and is even annoyed Sam is carrying on asking since we’re back to weighing them up against each other and everyone saying Sam is a better hunter and despite Sam in 6x01 basically trying to recruit Dean for his emotional instinct in a fight, long-term it does seem to be a problem for Sam as much as anything since he’s advised working around Dean to Samuel and has ongoing doubts Dean would want to kidnap a seemingly normal woman who has a kid to give to Crowley… So even though we do have that this isn’t a great thing to do expressed a little, we have a lot of “but I’m doing it anyway” and so we’re dragged along with this. Expressing concern over these choices doesn’t afford us an alternate POV, whereas the rest of the time when both of them have souls in working order, generally when there’s a morality crisis one or the other will take the more reasonable side, and they would work in opposition to explore the theme.

Maybe the ongoing orange for Dean is still a warning but for dealing with Sam. :P

I dunno, I’d be interested to see if the orange still follows him so much after Sam is re-soulled. I suppose after that point the story shifts so it’s clearer we’re moving towards Cas’s betrayal, so it could just switch what it’s warning? I do not remember SO MUCH orange episode after episode before now.

* * *

*more car porn* Wow calm it Phil.

(I’m kidding, don’t stop :P)

* * *

> SAM  
> Fine. She still had time to wolf out, Dean. The last werewolf was in bed, with me, and she wolfed out.
> 
> DEAN  
> Don’t make this personal.

>.> More personal to Dean than to Sam. I mean he cried over that one a little but Sam cried over it a lot… Not that Sam’s up to that right now, so Dean has to be the one to carry that burden of the sad Madison feels.

* * *

For some reason this is very funny to me. Maybe just because he’s so tall?

* * *

LOL Lucky changing in front of the window into Naked Dude and Sam immediately going for the binoculars to stare at him.

And now I’m laughing at how they would have had to film this with the naked guy lying on the floor next to the dog. 

Don’t be in random genre shows, kids. It’s going to put some odd stuff on your CV.

* * *

*Sam does a BAMF chase scene* When he wants to chase something he can really run.

… appreciating this awesome dog for all its running though. :3 What a cute co star for the episode.

I’m now actually really sad about Sam being all “that’s my dog!” to the random people who “rescued” Lucky from his car accident. Like, Sam and dogs is a thing. But soulless!Sam wouldn’t appreciate a dog in the same way and of course Lucky is creepy as hell so it’s not even a good situation if Sam wasn’t soulless. Just, wrong on so many levels here.

* * *

I really love this shot:

Dean, surrounded by orange, doing his season 6 sit-on-the-end-of-the-bed-and-think-about-lost-loves thing. (he’s done it 3-4 times for Lisa and at least twice for Cas :P) This time it’s Lisa. Anyway, again with the light over his head, and the contrast of the orange and blue in the window.

* * *

His contact list seems to be at least half random Campbells plus Lisa’s number (and Christian’s no. on there too even though he was revealed to be a demon last episode… I guess there was a mass phone number adding thing that they did but then he hasn’t gone through and cleared out any names. If he starts clearing out names like Christian he’s making the decision to delete or KEEP Lisa’s name too so… just leave everyone in there and pretend you don’t need to clear out those names :P

* * *

Aaargh Dean NEARLY poured a cup of coffee before Sam called. At the last minute the phone rang and he put the pot down.[ After my furious Dean x coffee shipping from last episode](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131577361428/nerdylittleshit-elizabethrobertajones) this is just cruel. :P

* * *

> SAM (on phone)  
> As in, the family dog seriously needs a neuter. 

Ew.

* * *

To the dog rescue place! \o/

Has anyone ever done a side-by-side of this episode to Dog Dean Afternoon? Would anyone actually WANT to? :P

At least these dogs aren’t talking.

* * *

Dean letting Sam lead on the interrogation is a terrible idea. :P

Well I mean effective good cop/bad coop, but still.

* * *

Then Dean intuits what’s up with Lucky because he’s got emotional empathy and stuff. 

> DEAN  
> Hang on, Sam. [to LUCKY (MAN)] Listen, you don’t have to tell me why you’re with the family. I get it.
> 
> LUCKY (MAN)  
> Oh, you do, do you?
> 
> DEAN  
> You killed every threat that came near them. You care about them, in your own whack-a-doodle kind of way. It’s obvious.

Or maybe seeing something of himself in there anyway?

> DEAN  
> What are you gonna do to that family, really? You gonna put your jaws around that little boy’s throat? Clamp down, listen to him cry for his mom? 'Cause I’m gonna guess that these are the only people who in your pathetic life have ever showed you any kindness. So it’s either that… or you can help us stop it. 

If he’s not thinking about SOMETHING he’s definitely good at imagining what it’s like to be in this position. I’m giving this a half point to all the Dean as a dog imagery over the years because he definitely sees his way into this POV…

* * *

> DEAN  
> Who gives a rat’s ass? We let that thing live one second, and it sends out that psychic dog whistle and [hand motions] phew!
> 
> SAM  
> On the other hand, it could lead us to an Alpha. Then Crowley would give me my soul back.
> 
> DEAN  
> Are you kidding? 150 people turned into monsters. That’s what you want?

Thankfully, Dean has lines when it comes to moral compromises :P At this point a clear number of people harmed vs Sam’s soul is enough to make him ditch any attempt to play along with the Crowley thing.

* * *

> DEAN  
> I mean, it’s your gigantor body and – and maybe your brain, but it’s not you. So just… stop pretending. Do us both a fav 

To be fair, Dean kind put some of this internal strife on himself by trying to see a different side of Sam despite the fact he knew something was wrong with him.

* * *

BAMF Sam AND Dean moments. :P

There’s a lot of yellow and stuff in here: Sam was standing against yellow earlier while spying on Lucky and now he’s being framed in front of a sort of yellow partition while he BAMFs in to shoot some of the skinchangers.

They’re having some fun shooting dogs that turn into naked guys. This is… weird. Extremely weird.

(ALTHOUGH to go to the OTHER uncomfortable episode with a dog in it, this might explain why Dean asked Portia which was first, lady or dog, in Man’s Best Friend With Benefits (oh god I forgot we have THREE uncomfortable dog episodes :P) since he’s actually seen what looks like just straight up normal dogs have an actual “human” form as their main body, since that’s what they revert to in death… ANyway it weirdly almost could justify Dean asking that because he’s genuinely curious if she’s  similar to a skinchanger or if this is I dunno a human form that a dog could “gain” on becoming a familiar…)

^ Things I did not expect to write while cheering for Mandy’s grossed out “get away from my family” speech happening on the other screen.

* * *

*Lucky eschews humanity and wanders off into the distance*

*Dean is now disturbed for life about dogs*

… Not that he was fond of dogs before. It’s amazing how many issues Dean has with dogs for so many reasons.

* * *

> SAM  
> So…I was thinking. You were right.
> 
> DEAN  
> About?
> 
> SAM  
> I’m not your brother. I’m not Sam.

…

> SAM  
> You wanted the real me. This is it. I don’t care about them. I don’t even really care about you. Except that… I need your help. And you’re clearly not gonna stick around for much longer unless I give it to you straight, so… I’ve done a lot worse than you know. I’ve killed innocent people in the line of duty. But I’m pretty sure it’s not something the old me could’ve done. And maybe I should feel guilty. But I don’t.
> 
> DEAN  
> Sam, get to the punch line.
> 
> SAM  
> I don’t know if how I am is better or worse. It’s different. You get the job done, and nothing really hurts. That’s not the worst thing. But I’ve been thinking. And it was… it was kinda harder. But there are also things about it I remember that I… Let’s just say I think I should probably go back to being him.

Archiving for all future discussions of Soulless!Sam analysis, because he is FASCINATING. And there’s not much I can really drag out of this right now? But this seems v. important for all future discussion.

Anyway end of episode.

* * *

Guess what’s next? :3


	9. 6x09

Or: [I feel like there are unfair](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/tagged/occasional-fairy-scholar-Lizbob-Jones) [expectations on me](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/110211419358/changelings-queerness-and-supernatural) for this episode so I’m just not going to mention fairies at all for the entire thing to keep it chill.

* * *

I like how the recap gives you absolutely no warning for this.

Mostly because there  _is_  no warning they could offer, except for maybe just randomly playing the clip of the slow-dancing alien from Tall Tales after all the Sam is Soulless stuff and… leaving it at that.

* * *

TBH why was that not the recap?

* * *

> PATRICK  
> Something out in the corn.

this is literally the most generically doomy line in the entire horror-ish genre tbh. Any time there is  _anything_  with a corn field, someone’s gonna look at it doing something strange and be like “nah I’m gonna walk into the corn that’s taller than me” and their companion if there is one is like “don’t do it!” and then they do it and they’re eaten by monsters/aliens/corn zombies/in this case, fairies… 

I’m just saying I have not watched that many horror or alien movies compared to some people and I feel like I have seen this scene 1000 times.

This Patrick guy would have had a much better chance if he knew anything about pop culture. :P

There must be essays about the significance of doomy corn in cinema and why if anything beyond the excellent visual use of the depth of it like sort of being in the seas on land or something. :P

* * *

*guy disappears into the corn and is never seen again by his girlfriend*

* * *

Who knew.

* * *

I like that the set guys probably got to make a crop circle just for fun. (I dunno maybe they waited for Crop Circle Season and some obliging aliens to make one in a nearby field, and then sprung on the opportunity.)

Like how often do you go into work and someone says, “go make a crop circle”. (I suppose the zoom out one is computer generated but they needed a space to film the close up stuff, real field or not.)

* * *

Ah yup there’s the slow-dancing alien.

* * *

The worst thing about this entire montage for the new title card is that they use the badge scene from 5x03 with Cas and include Misha in the credits for this episode. These are viable credits for an entire imaginary season with them ALL as FBI alien hunters but Misha is not in this episode and the first time I watched it I spent the entire time waiting for Cas to pop up and deliver us some Edlund-written Cas talking about aliens and/or fairies and to this day it is the greatest crime ever committed by Edlund on this show to tease such a thing yet not make it happen. >.>

Fuck you Edlund.

* * *

> WAYNE  
> We are right in the middle of what we in the field like to call a “UFO flap,” and I am as happy as a pig in shoes.
> 
> SHERIFF  
> I can guarantee you that this has nothing to do with UFO’s, little green men. Nothing extraterrestrial whatsoever.
> 
> MARION  
> Of course it’s not UFO’s. It’s fairies.

I like how the montage of interviewees presents all these points of view, and then though it seemed to be a documentary made by the  ~~leprechaun~~  UFO enthusiast at first it turns into Sam and Dean interviewing people on the street, breaking the documentary format and turning it just into them interviewing which is an abrupt POV change which makes one form of storytelling bleed into the other and that’s off the back of the fake credits to make this a spoof X Files episode already. Also like Hell House waaay back in season 1 you have all these random townfolk offering different interpretations of what’s up in quick contradictory succession, so it’s another episode with screwy narrative and meant to make you wonder about what it really is. In this case we get the answer straight up from Marion who turns into the expert they later consult, but it’s presented to us as the town being gripped by a whole lot of contradictory crazy. Neither fairies OR aliens are in the show’s mythos so this episode teeters in this weird way where it can go towards either of those suddenly being real. The emphasis on first impressions vs an actual answer makes aliens unlikely from the get-go if you are expecting a twist from it being too obvious, but it does leave it open for it to ‘just’ be shapeshifters or angels with a sense of humour or witchcraft or  _something_  which has already been established in the lore, and the episode is just messing with the aesthetic of the X Files to have you going and keep things fresh in other ways, and not introduce new lore on anything.

(If you never read my original [fairy meta](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/110211419358/changelings-queerness-and-supernatural), I did basically explain how me vs season 6 of Supernatural happened in exactly the same timeframe as me vs a dissertation all about fairytales and folklore, where I was spending all day reading in the library about fairy related stuff, then I would stagger home and watch more Supernatural. So. I came into the episode  _immensely_  biased and knew what we were up against immediately (like, cold open immediately because I knew aliens had to be a fake out and I knew the answer to if not aliens then what :P) I had probably read within the last few weeks of first viewing this about how fairies and UFOs share a headspace in humanity. There were even fairy crazes in the same way we see a UFO craze in this episode - for example those faked photos of the fairies at the bottom of the girls’ garden that Arthur Conan Doyle got obsessed with caused a similar sort of fairy-spotting craze.)

* * *

Also last episode I was talking about how every episode had its place in the ongoing arc and that was the best thing about season 6? This episode literally has no reason except “we wanted to make this episode” and serves nothing to the ongoing plot and I love it. 

* * *

Like,  _The French Fucking Mistake_  is a key mytharc episode, and yet there is no justification for this in the main plot.

They just wanted fairies.

* * *

There are so many flowers in the background of this episode. :D

* * *

*Dean wildly fails at understanding what ‘Soulless’ means*

> DEAN  
> Right. You don’t care.
> 
> SAM  
> Well—
> 
> DEAN  
> You have to care!
> 
> SAM  
> About what, exactly?
> 
> DEAN  
> About everything, man! About being human at least.

* * *

> DEAN  
> Hey, you wanna be a real boy, Pinnochio, you gotta act the part.
> 
> …
> 
> SAM  
> So you’re saying you’ll be my… Jiminy Cricket.

Getting closer, guys. Disney folktales are a good start anyway. :P

* * *

I know the main story I heard the most similar versions of was “the elves and the shoemaker” but I think there was a clockmaker tale? I don’t know if it was the same plot or if I am just thinking of a story with a clockmaker or if, in fact, I am not misremembering how in Princess Tutu there was that bit with all the clockwork.

My brain is soup. 

Anyway there are more orange flowers outside this guy’s shop. 

* * *

I’ve just noticed Dean seems to be wearing green? Since he’s Jiminy Cricket?

He literally never wears green which is a crime against humanity because green brings out his eyes. 

* * *

There’s an emphasis on time this episode already: clockmaker… talking about the 72 hour thing for missing persons and how it’s been weeks… The fairy communicating on-screen by means of wiggling a watch around before we get a reveal of who’s behind all this… The fuck-off huge clock outside the watchmaker’s as his sign :P 

The episode has Fairy Time as an element and that’s always a fun thing to play with. Obviously the show uses a similar concept for Hell running on a different time to Earth so it’s not a new concept and makes sense for the alternate worlds to do such things. (And I remain perpetually baffled they didn’t do similar with Purgatory because that more than anything in any of the lore including stacked against the fairy stuff is about time dilation - original purgatory in Catholic lore so far as I was ever taught about it in my secular education literally existed as a place to stretch out time for punishment before Judgement Day, a date perpetually believed to be around the corner, and yet you may require a billion years of being flayed for your sins before you were ready to go to Judgement Day purified and good for God. The fact Purgatory is name-dropped for the first time 2 episodes ago and then we get an episode with Fairy Time does seem to me to suggest they should have, could have, and kind of… forgot. :P)

* * *

(But like, Dean n Cas thinking they’ve been gone forever and dropping back out and Sam’s missed them for like a  _week_. He’s not even done with the inevitable Sam Winchester Heavy Drinking Breakdown that he always burns through before finding a better course of action, and bam, Cas n Dean come back all ragged and bloody and like wow that was a few million years we won’t get back again. How’ve YOU been Sam?)

* * *

The flowers have all been yellow and orange, and there’s a lot of yellow and gold and orange details on the street as well. 

Maybe season 6 is just yellow.

I mean this is an episode with corn as a major feature in the first 10 minutes…

* * *

> DEAN  
> But do NOT engage with, maim or in any way kill Brennan. In fact, I don’t want you making any judgment calls whatsoever. Anything happens, call me.
> 
> SAM  
> You know, Jiminy, I was on my own for a whole year. I did fine without you.
> 
> DEAN  
> Yeah. I don’t want to know your definition of fine.

More troubles with Winchester definitions. :P In this case, Sam taking it to a rather more alarming extreme of “i may have killed or hurt a lot of people but you know whatevs”

* * *

Oh no, Dean went to investigate the crop circle and left Baby’s engine running.  _Dean no_.

* * *

I wonder if it was Dean’s ringtone that caused him to get captured by fairies. :P Were the fairies taking guys at random in town, or only that first born sons had an extremely high incidence of walking into that crop circle?

(He seems startled when his phone rings, so he’s already on edge just standing in the field. I guess seeing his first crop circle with unexplained happenings to back it up is kind of scary. He’s watched a lot of X Files, hasn’t he? :P I think there is also something to talk about with Dean’s connection to the fairy world that they come across here, so perhaps an unquiet feeling of dread because of this, as it comes to be a perception thing for him as a result of this experience…)

* * *

Sam mentions that the watchmaker is indulging in alcoholism. Again, that theme is sneaking up on Dean over Gamble Era, and this guy is not just connected to the fairies/seeing them but the one who brought them down upon the town. Dean being the other guy who can see them in this episode sort of links them by default.

* * *

Ooh the “aliens” helpfully turned off Baby for Dean before they abducted him. Which is good for the environment that her engine isn’t chugging away all this time, but bad that Dean can’t escape in her :P I suppose he could have left the engine off but the lights on just for the sake of getting some light into the crop circle?

ALSO he doesn’t get out an EMF meter or anything. I’m belatedly realising that they really haven’t used one for ages? They tend to crack them out when we already sort of know it’s a ghost anyway, and it’s been a lot of MotW with actual monsters, and before that it was a lot of apocalypse, so them doing the whole ghostbusters thing is really far away. When do we even next have ghosts again? (Don’t say the mannequin episode. DO NOT say the mannequin episode)

I just want to know if fairies light up the EMF meter in the SPN universe.

Because they seem to have enough magic to do things like just manually turn off the car with intent, while ghosts tend to kill or turn on technology at random and mysteriously, but usually just with their presence because they’re giving out EMF all the time and it’s only sort of vaguely directed towards doing specific actions?

I dunno :P Back to the souls = electricity thing again. We have no definition of what the fairies actually are, but they seem to be entirely Other and this episode at least makes a point of that with the whole only Dean can see them thing.

* * *

Sam casually drinking while listening to Dean get abducted will always be the funniest thing.

* * *

Sam did eventually go looking for Dean, I suppose. 

*he wanders through the corn unbothered*

* * *

Important things:

If this wasn’t a UFO, what was it? :P

Since it’s already been established the fairies are abducting people as a big glowing blob of light it’s easy to guess that is the blob of light in motion, especially since it’s just picked up Dean, and he’s missing all this time.

One of the cool things about fairies and UFOs crossing over is how weird lights in the skies often used to be associated with them, when they weren’t mistaken for angels. Things like the Wild Hunt were ascribed to comets or meteor showers. I’m pretty sure that thing is meant to be fairy activity and they weren’t just trolling us with something whooshing overhead just for kicks to suggest it WAS aliens, anyway. Since it turns out all the alien activity was fairies all along, and the big UFO frenzy is a cover for the fairy activity. 

* * *

I like the way the alien spotters have a big American flag accessorising one of the vans. Like, of course this is a really American thing. (Not that there isn’t a lot of UFO weirdness in other parts of the world, but within America this is… I guess some sort of cultural thing? Of sorts?

Our fascination with American UFO culture is definitely a thing too. Aside from the Simon Pegg/Nick Frost movie Paul, I distinctly remember an Area 51 conspiracy movie with Ant and Dec of all people, and you can’t get more British than that. :P Anyway this episode is coming from within rather than someone peering up against the window in bafflement, but considering when Paul was released, the Ant and Dec thing was my biggest experience with this UFO culture in popular media aside from all the documentaries and Fortean Times stuff that could be encountered in my house when I was much younger and my dad was researching alien conspiracies or something for some reason I have no tangible explanation for :P

* * *

I bet none of the alien people saw the fairy whooshing overhead.

* * *

I love Sam going to the UFO specialists for help. Like… Okay, he’s soulless, so his approach is pretty blunt, but let’s stop and take a moment to consider this wasn’t just some weird thing about Sam being soulless and missing something because of  _that_ , since he’s pretty quick to dismiss the lady who believes in fairies at the start, and instead focus on Sam - actual Sam, being the one providing the memories to Soulless Sam by which he operates - apparently having a gulf in his general knowledge where he… wouldn’t… know that this was a completely fruitless quest? Like, as I said, I have had a casual interest in UFOs and cryptozoology just because there was a lot of material about it in my house when I was younger so I just kind of read about it every now and again. Even a cursory study about it would tell you that UFO hunters don’t… actually… know how to find or communicate with UFOs in the sort of way Sam is thinking of paralleling them directly to monster hunters who legit have a subculture of contact with the uncanny.

We know he gets the X Files references (and tbh has probably been in the same room as Dean consuming pretty much all his pop culture except for what he may have watched while Sam was at college even if he doesn’t tend to make as many references) so, like, he  _knows something_  about it. Maybe JUST the X Files stuff though… I am just deeply amused by the thought that Sam makes a leap here or has had this deep-seated wrong assumption all his life. I mean it  _could_  just be because UFOs were suddenly proved to be real because Dean got abducted, so he thought he’d at least give them a try to see if there was a secret UFO culture to go with the monster hunter one and they were all in on the secret, but you’d think Sam, who loves research into random monsters, would have at least checked what people knew about this  _for real_  at some point.

I’m going on the assumption that Sam hasn’t ever really looked into UFO “lore” before in the sense of finding out how the search for extra terrestrial life manifests itself, and made the general assumption that aliens were real but not typically their problem (maybe even kept a cute little hope in his heart that since monsters were real and THEY had to deal with them, maybe X Files was a thing too for real and they just never managed to cross paths and get in the way of one of their investigations sooner???), and… I dunno, somehow this has got some wires crossed in Soulless Sam? Taking Sam’s belief and turning it into something more logical and therefore giving him this weird approach?

This whole thing seems really bizarre to me for Sam’s motivations. He’s not stupid while soulless, so there’s got to be something underlying which makes him go straight up ask a UFO spotter for UFO lore and treat it like his fault he can’t tell him anything… 

So yeah. No idea what he was actually walking into, romantic notion that aliens are real that got mangled by soulessness not dealing well with the concept of a “romantic notion”? :P

* * *

(This shit BOTHERS me)

* * *

(Also because the way my stories go, I may end up writing soulless characters at some point and already have some equivalents in my stories, so having a really good profile of example characters and how someone else handled writing them, especially with a comparison to a character as complex as Sam in his normal self that I know well, helps me :P)

* * *

Anyway, I think this is the first actual time we’ve seen Sam (soulless Sam) alone and handling things for a significant amount of time? He’s lacking a POV and generally they actually have been keeping the main story away from him and telling us everything important through Dean, with only a few Sam bits. I suppose with the secret about the soul out they can give us more - last episode was better for Sam POV too but this time Dean’s completely removed for a while and the focus is on Sam HAVING to deal without him in a non-murdery way.

* * *

Also while I’m talking about Soulless Sam; something to consider completely other from the point of that fairy meta I keep linking so let’s just forget all that, but Sam as a changeling child is a serious thing in this show’s mythos, what with the whole demon blood storyline and everything happening to him because he was altered as a baby… Obviously he wasn’t traded out completely, but yeah. The effect on his life may as well have been like he was swapped at birth from the “normal” son who wouldn’t have brought this all down on his family.

One changeling lore thing is that there was a ton of stuff to protect against it, ie certain charms, not cutting the baby’s hair or fingernails… I can’t remember if it was an actual timeline of their 6 month birthday because that seems a long time to stress about changelings; I feel like it was more like 1-2… ANYWAY there was a burden on the mother to protect the kid from getting turned into a changeling, so it was on the parents (but obviously the mother in olden times would usually be the one spending more time with the baby) to protect the kid. In the same way Mary selling Sam to Azazel to be changed is a failure on her duty to care for him.

Anyway in the context of season 6, Soulless Sam is a different sort of changeling in that he’s Sam but there’s just something… wrong about him. Looks like him, even talks like him most of the time, and he still manages to completely unnerve Dean before he knows what’s up. And it’s complicated because he has replaced Sam, and a lot of changeling lore is also weird stuff to do to get the original kid BACK again… Much like Dean is struggling to restore Sam. Which puts him in the maternal role in this parallel yet again. :P

Also thinking about Azazel and all, he skips over Dean and goes for Sam instead. It’s interesting since so many of the special children didn’t have siblings (mostly because of the high attrition rate on the mothers - this was a terrible plan the more you look at it with Apocalypse hindsight :P) and we either had twins or I think Jake had a little sister? Anyway, Dean existing before Sam is important to properly fulfil their roles and make Sam the younger brother to Dean as Lucifer was to Michael… it’s almost weird that Yellow Eyes didn’t wait around only trapping families who were likely to have a second child? Or already had a first? Anyway, this episode has Dean being picked on for being an elder son, or… you know, the first born. It’s a weird way of tiding over his mytharc status from the whole Michael’s vessel thing for another few years, and one of the few times it isn’t done with any baggage connected to having to kill Sam because of it like with the Michael or Cain parallels. But it’s a reminder that birth order and brotherhood have mystical properties in this show’s mythos, again something that in folklore and fairytales often is a literal property of the universe (and here in this episode shows again that it is a literal property of this universe, and something that has been the myth arc twice for Dean - this is a little of my Dean is the centre of the universe theory I am constantly picking up on :P).

I dunno, I really like how the fairies fit into this show’s mythology so well. They also find they’re already equipped to hunt them thanks to the cross-over of methods, AND some of the weirder lore like the grains of salt thing is stuff that applies to other monsters - namely, vampires - in IRL folklore, and is something that would have been obviously left out as nonsense when coming up with the show’s cool monsters, but they get to use the weird stuff here because it’s okay to let fairies be dorky. :P

* * *

Oh HEY this episode is where those horrible blankets were from. All the way back in Yellow Fever I was like “I’M SURE THOSE TERRIBLE GREEN BLANKETS ARE MORE SIGNIFICANT SOMEWHERE” and here they are again in the corny motel room. :3 (I’m not just calling it “corny” this is literally the one with the big wooden corn on the divider)

They’ve popped up multiple times since then since there’s like 10 standard quilts that they just re-use all the time depending on what colour the room is, but I think these blankets would probably be best remembered as being from this episode if my past self watching 4x06 had wanted a good episode to connect to. :P

//detouring into discussion of rape in season 6//

Though to go back to Yellow Fever, that episode did a lot of good work uncorking Dean’s fear visibly on screen for us and so it’s always worth giving it a nod when Dean does things like visibly demonstrate his germphobia or whatever, so why not call it a pertinent reference. In this case he’s completely rattled by the fairy attack because despite going up in light vs down into a dark place, it’s kind of a parallel to his Hell experiences, which were the underlying reason he was so easy to freak out in Yellow Fever (and apparent canon in the episode aside, since that was mostly guess work, I feel like Dean may have been affected because he had the most to be afraid of rather than because of his behaviour).

Last episode had what I think was the first actual on-screen mention of rape this season, and specifically mentioned as demons raping people - there’s some discussion on that I reblogged here: <http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131636153000/bert-and-ernie-are-gay-lurea-all-dogs-go-to>

but of course as the most obvious thing there’s also been the bit where Dean got turned into a vampire, which was coded as a sexual assault, just with turning him into a vampire. Season 6 and 7 are kind of the worst for this because if nothing else there’s a LONG thread about Sam’s soul in Hell spoken about in these terms, whether from Hallucifer or just random comments from other characters. I don’t  _think_  there’s been a specific mention of what might be happening to Sam’s soul yet, just that he doesn’t have it and it’s still in the cage, but in any case, Dean brings up that he associates demons with rape (and uses a lot of terms about Crowley literally buggering them which I distractedly laughed at because season 10 but really should have been due some proper thought except I was in the dog episode so I suppose deferring all serious thought for now…) and now his interaction with the fairies is coded as a seriously uncomfortable encounter. His first words on them?

> DEAN  
> They were grabby, incandescent douche bags. Good night.

and it gets worse from here. >.> 

* * *

(If nothing else it’s wildly insensitive to have a motel room decorated with corn when Dean just had a horrific experience in a corn field… I mean talk about triggers.)

* * *

AMAZINGLY the incredibly on-going season 6 theme of Dean Sitting On The Edge Of The Bed Holding Alcohol continues. I am honestly impressed. I mean Sam poured him the drinks to steady his nerves but this seems to be one of the most consistent images of the show right now. 

(Or Sam was managing Dean’s behaviour, as some people suggested that Cas could have been manipulating Dean a little by pouring him drinks, which makes for a more sinister parallel between Soulless!Sam and Cas, since Cas doesn’t overtly have anything wrong with him for a good chunk of the season so far as we know - he’s just acting more grumpy.)

* * *

Watching on DVD quality for the first time, I am struck by how the wallpaper appears to have a faint pattern of corn on it as well.

* * *

While Dean’s story about how he was abducted makes it sound like he got out relatively unscathed apart from being shaken up, and how being heavily armed (we see he also had time to draw a knife by the time he’s dropped back in our world) there’s still a lot of stuff both that would freak out Dean anyway just based on how he’s got a history of being assaulted (and knows what to dread from aliens - if not for pop culture than the Tall Tales dancing alien reminder also carries the reminder if you hold the episode fresh in your mind, that that guy was “probed and probed and probed and…” and Dean reacts sharply to Sam saying “probing table”) and just how the encounter is framed, with the “safe space” comment with Sam clearly replicating some behaviour he’s seen somewhere on how to comfort people who’ve been through trauma (and Dean jumping a mile at being touched), and the whole needing to go take a shower comment. 

Just to get this all out of the way as much as I can, there’s also the whole “did you service Oberon” bit later and Dean gives Sam a sketchy look over it (which makes me wonder how much time slippage he had if he really did meet Oberon - it’s implied fairy world to Earth is LESS time passing in fairy than here, but it could be anything) and there’s a whole sort of atmosphere in this episode with the fairies as a very sinister (and sexually threatening) presence. I talked a bit in my fairy meta when breaking down the stuff relating to Dean about this but to save you going to look, basically Dean encounters an extremely male coded fairy world, and this episode makes the associations extremely clear (and I can really understand why Robbie immediately went for much more gender neutral or feminine coded fairy stuff for Charlie to be associated with when this was what fairies were established as here). Of course we actually get “king of the fairies” said on screen, and while he’s only a hypothetical character it plays right into the way these fairies seem to operate within a sort of fairy patriarchy.

If nothing else, rank the fairies by size. The most important one we see is the man-sized leprechaun (and whoever the other was that was following Dean) but the fairies who do all the manual labour on the watch-making are tiny, and then the only female coded fairy is the smallest, and apparently just decoratively naked with no purpose to the plot at all.

(and compare to Gilda, towering over Charlie on her introduction/unmasking and speaking with authority about her place in her fairy realm… I can’t remember if she said she was literally a fairy princess but she certainly seemed to be an authority figure talking about taking back the bad guy to be disciplined there…)

But yeah, basically all of the major player fairies are guys, and they have this creepy stuff they do to people they capture which is passingly LIKE the experience of alien abduction to make Dean not realise until later that it wasn’t an actual close encounter. So all of this creates a huge impression of violence of male-coded creatures attacking Dean. And then in a really creepy way their encounter gives him the ability to see them - which leads to him being pursued down the street by a threat no one else can perceive… I dunno, it reads like a victim thing to me where he’s sort of metaphorically paranoid of seeing them again, and he IS threatened again and not only that but no one else can see them and he’s treated as crazy for feeling threatened by it or perceiving this danger in the form of unwanted sexual aggression that no one else can see or will believe him… 

* * *

Okay I’m done :P 

* * *

(Oh hey there are more American flags on the walls in here)

* * *

Cut to the pub, where they are having coffee (COFFEE) and there is an El Sol sign hanging behind Sam. I guess because they are still going on the theory that it’s aliens and they’re still extremely wrong 16 minutes into the episode, which is a long time to be wrong about it :P

* * *

This has got to at least halfway count towards “always right when you’re sarcastic”:

> DEAN  
> So, on top of all the demons and the angels and the ghosts and the skinwalkers, it turns out that there’s—so if aliens are actually real, what’s next? Hobbits? Seriously.

* * *

> DEAN  
> Our reality’s collapsing around us, and you’re trying to pick up our waitress?

For absolutely no reason I feel compelled to glare at Buckleming :P

(Dean carries on being annoyed about this, using it to highlight how Sam is soulless because he’s not suffering enough, and emphasises that you don’t do this kind of thing if you have a soul to distract you with crippling suffering while thinking about everything that’s bumming you out.

ON THE OTHER HAND never mind the Cas to Soulless Sam parallels, there are a lot of parallels to  _normal_  Dean, from the whole “being used as a blunt little instrument” thing to Dean coming to the wrong conclusion that Sam was trying to be more like him… The looking suggestively at women thing is something we’ve seen Dean do plenty of already, so… *shrugs*)

* * *

(from the google search as well: “then the aliens finally come to sweep you into their tentacled embrace, their dazzling lights may disorient you so much, you’ll be…”)

([just for the fact that apparently Caged Heat was meant to feature gratuitous tentacles](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/127625161283/justanotheridijiton-elizabethrobertajones))

I am noticing that the search term is STILL “results for Possessions and Doppelgangers” which is presumably still laziness not thematic relevance.

> DEAN  
> Yeah, well at least books have punctuation.

Dean x research - showing an unexpectedly favourable side to books and also being pedantic about well-written stuff :P

(On the other hand I suppose with the dyslexic!Dean headcanon that I see floating up every now and again, Dean having issues with poorly spelled online content could be a thing.)

* * *

Uhoh I hear David Bowie playing…

* * *

…

I think the fairy smacked Dean for looking at her nipples. 

* * *

… the microwave ding. Dear god.

This episode.

* * *

Honestly this is my favourite fight scene in the show bar Sam getting beaten up by clowns

* * *

The bit where Sam and Dean peer into the microwave and discuss the “blech” in it is probably a very good metaphor for media interpretation and I would like to submit for consideration this is sort of Dean being awoken to a certain subtext of this universe, re: now being able to see fairies.

* * *

“She hit me”

Don’t worry Sam, we are all laughing at Dean.

* * *

Seriously the FLOWERS in this episode.

I assume this is for the link to fairies. 

* * *

This is hands down the best interview with an expert ever.

* * *

> MARION
> 
> Yes. Faery comes in many shapes and sizes. Magical, mischievous beings from the realm next door.
> 
> DEAN
> 
> The fairy realm.
> 
> MARION
> 
> Mm-hmmm.
> 
> SAM
> 
> So it’s like another dimension?
> 
> MARION
> 
> Another reality! Yes. Only people who have been there and returned to our world can see the Faery here.

…

> MARION
> 
> Mmm. There is much theory and little fact. We know they only take firstborn sons, just like Rumplestiltskin did. Personally, I think they’re taken to Avalon to service Oberon, the King of the Faery.

So this is about as much lore as we get about fairy realms right now, which is all oddly fitting with what is going on directly in this episode, i.e. the fact she mentions the first born sons thing off hand. I like to think she was just particularly in tune with this area’s fairies, since she was casually right about it all (I think she is living in a trailer? Which maybe she travels around to where fairies are just like the UFO spotters? Lots of caravans in this episode). 

Like, if we just assume all fairy lore is real, since this episode takes a very broad approach to permitting it to be, then there’s stuff that contradicts this (i.e. all the IRL lore about fairy queens, all the other more feminine-coded fairy stuff in the show which doesn’t get a look in in this episode…) (I know the later stuff takes a more high-fantasy approach as Charlie wanders around surrounded by references to LotR, Game of Thrones, Harry Potter… or they appropriate Oz into being fairy lore, but there is other folklore stuff that’s female centric and left out of this particular episode but could have fit with the specific way Edlund was scavenging IRL lore rather than fantasy tropes as Robbie did) so I don’t think it was necessarily wrong to change things later?

Like there can be other ways for people to see fairies, like, the same rules don’t have to work for all of them? Marion doesn’t know anything about fairy realms and she also mushes Avalon (I swear that’s just Arthurian legend?) and Oberon together… later Robbie just casually throws 2 more fairy realms in plus a reference to the fact there can be many, so it kind of confirmed the theory I was working with by that point that this episode’s fairies don’t have to be like the others…

(Yeah, 9x18 was like 99% staggering Destiel revelations to me on first watch, and 1% “oh hey neat MULTIPLE FAIRY REALMS WITH DIFFERENT FAIRIES CONFIRMED”… it was a good day. :P)

(I may be too forgiving of Robbie for completely contradicting this episode and throwing a ton of extra lore in out of nowhere and coming up with a billion realms and stuff but on the other hand I trust Robbie and prefer the way he writes fairies into the show (and that he references them existing even when he doesn’t have to) and I love this episode but on the other hand Edlund’s fairies just work for this episode and not outside of it. :P It’s like how I was wondering if they struggled with writing werewolves without just telling Heart over again because of the very specific mechanics… And now I’m laughing because as far as I recall they didn’t revisit werewolves again until Robbie Thompson had another go at changing their lore into something more manageable for multiple episodes from season 8 onwards? Apparently he’s who you call when you have troublesome established lore you need to retcon the crap out of. :P)

* * *

Dean gets so thoughtful when they start talking about servicing Oberon… it’s not just that reaction shot after Sam asks him. Oh god, was he really in Faery for so much longer than he claimed? I always forget how convincing this moment randomly was that there is more to his story he is never sharing. For all we know he went on an epic 10 week quest :P

* * *

> MARION  
> Ohhh. All Faery hate iron, and the dark Faery burn when touched with silver. What else. Oh! You can spill sugar or salt in front of them. No matter how powerful, the Faery must stoop to count each grain.

… I was spending all this time feeling I was mis-remembering if SPN fairies were affected by iron or silver whenever I mentioned one but not the other, but there you go, I wasn’t wrong either time. :P

I like this connection too actually - a great deal of monsters are affected by silver, probably because it’s a very pure metal (?? Like, olde timey pre-periodic table logic I guess :P) and monsters and fairies having this common link of the  _evil_  part of them being affected by silver is curious, and then iron affects all ghosts (i.e. even Sam and Dean’s spirit projections in 4x15 were affected by it) and also hurts demons so iron seems connected in the lore much more to things connected to the human spirit…

Who knows where fairies fit into Creation in this universe, but the overlap is fascinating.

* * *

And then Sam says the thing about cups that everyone quotes about Soulless!Sam being so cute ignoring how murdery he was. :P

* * *

Like, there is no “only” about Sam and tiny cups.

* * *

Oh lordy gratuitous Dean’s boots here. *pauses to gif that* 

* * *

Yeah, all the little fairy workers were dudes too.

And all wearing clothes too.

Some serious double-standards in this fairy world.

* * *

You know, Sam’s yellow and green striped shirt is vaguely thematic for all this corn focus. I’m giving him a pass for wearing it, just like that one time in 10x14 it was thematically important for him to wear the rusty bacon shirt.

* * *

> SAM  
> The watches. Just stunning. What I can’t figure out is how one man can put out that much product. I mean, hell! If I didn’t know better, I’d say you have a bunch of elves working for you. Except I do know better, and you have a bunch of elves working for you.

Hehe. I love soulless Sam sometimes.

* * *

*Dean getting really paranoid about fairies* 

*changing direction walking on the street feeling uncomfortable about beanie!fairy watching him*

(beanie!fairie is standing in front of a taxidermy shop, with a big deer painted on it. I have no idea if that could be thematically relevant or not but it’s worth noting :P)

*Dean walking suspiciously away with orange light behind him from many sources*

I guess orange light is just the general warning sign at the moment away from the endless red exit signs which are sort of more a death omen in the show’s language.

* * *

Yeah, the whole Dean being followed by the red beanie fairy is totally not at all suggestive of feeling harassed on the street.

* * *

*episode takes a turn to the completely awkward*

*peers between fingers*

> SHERIFF  
> I’m just trying to understand exactly what kind of hate crime this even was.

Technically it was a hate crime against actual literal fairies since Dean is deeply unimpressed with them and busy exploding their womenfolk… *takes the fairies’ side*

* * *

If you look and listen closely in the little tiny montage of Dean in the jail cell you can catch him pretending to play the harmonica audibly for like less than a second. That’s the first time I’ve noticed that. :P

Dean is ridiculously goofy in this episode. I think the whole ordeal caused a slight nervous breakdown. 

* * *

> SAM  
> Well, you weren’t very clear with him on the terms.
> 
> WAYNE /LEPRECHAUN  
> I told him there was a price. Once we come, we come to stay.
> 
> SAM  
> So you take firstborns and then what?

I’m just amused by the probably unintentional parallel to 9x11, “First Born”. :P I mean Dean kind of was the one who didn’t even ask for the terms and conditions, but on the other hand Cain just went for it without being like, no really, listen first… 

> WAYNE /LEPRECHAUN   
> Your brother? Heh. He’s marked. Been to the ranch. He’s ours now.

* * *

The way the Leprechaun talks sounds weirdly like Irish Azazel just with the way he inflects everything he says. Srsly go re-watch something with the main Azazel actor saying things like 2x21 or something and then listen to this guy.

> WAYNE /LEPRECHAUN  
> I could see that right off. You’re missing a certain piece, right in the center, ain’t you?
> 
> SAM  
> Says who?
> 
> WAYNE /LEPRECHAUN  
> We fairy folk? We’re all about energy. And the human soul gives off a certain perfume.

*adds to the pile of things I wonder about the fairies in this show*

I am ASSUMING this is another of our super early season 6 plot arc foreshadowing things - a nice early reference to souls just being energy.

But yeah they’re definitely very other to humans, if they’re up there with intelligent critters that only see humans as a power source… Dependant on them to summon them into this world to exploit it though. I’d assume unless that spell is said the fairies really can’t get into this world so they’re locked away themselves, hence getting in as much people-snatching as they can knowing that humans have a fair amount of power over them… Both this book Brennan had with the spells in and the book in 8x11 are key to the fairies’ presence in the human world and they’re vulnerable to human whim to summon or dismiss them…

* * *

*Sam and Dean are beat up by a fairy each*

* * *

Sam both badasses his way out with the salt thing and… has a fair point about letting himself get beaten up for ages by not remembering it sooner :P

* * *

I like the ridiculously quick way the fairies are all zapped back.

Like, yep, this episode is over now. There’s a minute left. No time for a showy finale. 

* * *

Well except for the non bro-ment because Sam’s not really up to the emotional sharing. I guess which is why it’s SO short.

* * *

> DEAN  
> You think Lucky Charms really could have , you know, soul to sender?
> 
> SAM  
> Come on. It’s crazy to think. He did talk a good game though.
> 
> DEAN  
> You said no. Why?
> 
> SAM  
> It was a deal. When’s a deal ever been a good thing?

…

> SAM  
> Dude, I do still have all my brain cells. If anything, my brain works better now.

*not at all ominous discussion of Sam having second thoughts about the whole soul deal after Dean wasted a good chunk of the episode going on and on about how souls were suffering* Not good at the PR really. :P

Anyway, C&P’d text because Sam being unemotionally aware that deals are crappy and cutting them for the sake of saving each other and general gaming the system is, from a totally objective POV, a good source of a lot of their strife. Of course, considering all the deals are made in the heat of hugely emotional moments, he wouldn’t understand that one from his nice comfy no-soul perspective. Aw Sam.

We need to fix you so you can be free to make terrible emotional decisions again. >.>


	10. 6x10

… I don’t even remember how I was formatting these posts tbh

But seriously what an episode to stall on. It’s been 90% of my reason not to continue the rewatch and then I start thinking about it after the last couple of weeks because it managed to somehow make itself relevant again, and now I’m actually excited :P All I needed was half a season about soulless people, hands of God, Casifer and who knows what else I ended up making links back to this episode and season 6 in general over and over, and now I *need* to watch it and the rest of season 6. 

HERE WE GO

* * *

Previously on Lizzy’s rewatch notes:

- [season 6 is all about reality](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130232842193/6x01-rewatch-or-amazingly-i-thought-i-was-gonna) (battle lines are drawn, everyone is settling into their favourite lie for the season, the show takes a soft reboot and tells us so very loudly, sheets are bad, Bobby is the best)  
- [don’t steal babies](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130554062498/6x02-rewatch-or-its-been-one-episode-and) (the show continues quietly rebooting itself, Dean continues rotting in suburbia with his father issues, I still don’t think we talk enough about Dean and S!Sam going for “bobby-john” to name the baby, the new writers for season 6 were all sat down and yelled at to write smart!Dean, Lisa is the best)  
- [reminder that Dean n Cas were married](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130629091918/6x03-rewatch-probably-dean-staring-out-of-the) (Lisa was a dream all along, episode takes massive damage from 11x14′s Hand of God new lore, S!Sam and Dean spent an hour off-screen catching bugs, S!Sam’s laptop has a black background because he’s soulless)  
- [Weekend at Bobby’s is actually a direct parallel to the Man Who Would Be King](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130687322843/6x04-rewatch-or-bobby-is-surly-repeat-bobby-is) (in the background of this episode you can see Crowley having a shitfest of a year which parallels to Cas in 6x03 showing up about as cheerful, no one wants to live next door to Bobby, Rufus and Jody are the best, Lizzy realises the theme of ominous orange backgrounds warning about danger was actually just a theme relating to cheese)  
- [vampires are weird](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/130979377238/6x05-rewatch-or-i-am-morbidly-curious-about-the) (the Bella and Edward knock offs were the best thing in this episode, the blue rose of betrayal shows up, everyone is really shady and awful, Dean is a damsel in distress as well as a fucking melodramatic creature of the night)  
- [that episode where Dean is worried Sam is possessed by Lucifer without him knowing it and I am crying tears of blood over season 11](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131256616968/6x06-rewatch-or-tbh-i-like-this-episode-more) (” I am darkly amused by the idea of Lucifer actually coming back and being just, like, screw the apocalypse maybe I will just be Sam for a bit. Lucifer going hunting. Lucifer pretending not to be a big bad angel and sort of saving people for a change. Being creepy as hell and all the other stuff Soulless Sam is but not actually maliciously trying to end the world. ” Change names in there and you see me grabbing my past self by the shoulders and shaking her violently… also: everyone is lying except Dean our beacon of moral justice for the season (putting him in a dodgy role as the only POV character as the guy who can do no wrong and also… he lies about stuff this episode), Cas gets badgered for help/information because this is the season where he actually is taken for granted in such a way if you’re going to level that accusation, there is an actual pattern to Dean drinking while sitting at the end of a bed this season and I still hadn’t cracked it by the time I gave up the rewatch)  
- [Dabb continues to be terrible at writing cars](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131553477933/6x07-rewatch-this-episode-is-pretty-much-just) (blah blah picking away at the secrets everyone is holding, Dean is a filthy coffee thief, MUCH musing on the passivity and uselessness of the plot this half of the season mostly because it’s a plot episode in a season with a really sketchy plot)  
- [dog episode](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131630862263/6x08-rewatch-the-other-dog-episode-why-does-the) (based on my comments while re-reading I must have written this a week before 11x04: “ Like, imagine if Cas was in every episode but just to tell them where to go hunt monsters. Waving them off from the bunker door before going back to do some nerdy Cas thing as a stay-at-home angel. *nods*” SIGH)  
- [fairy episode](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/131995460163/6x09-rewatch-or-i-feel-like-there-are-unfair) (less said about that the better ;))

I mentioned multiple times how I’ve never been convinced by season 6′s continuity and Caged Heat is to blame, so now I’m wondering just what impression it was I took away from it all the times I’ve re-watched it and thought it didn’t hold up to scrutiny because that’s all I’ve been saying over and over :P (Although after re-reading my rewatch of Family Matters, I’m vaguely suspicious my thought that there was Serious Continuity Nonsense this end of the season was that episode’s fault and it just blurred into this one because they both ended up in industrial sites being used for suspicious purposes by Crowley. LET’S SEE)

* * *

Previously on Supernatural

Megstiel teasing, Sam has no soul, Crowley is a dick, Purgatory was still making me grind my teeth back in 2010 or whenever this aired, because that’s not how Purgatory works, and I remain eternally grateful to season 8 for fixing it even a little :P

* * *

Crowley gets a “confront yourself” moment with the alpha shapeshifter, which I’d say doesn’t really do anything symbolically except that 6x02 ALSO really didn’t do anything interesting with the alpha shapeshifter appearing as everyone else it showed up in front of, so this pretty much happened entirely to have the pun before the title card

for a season that was much more emotionally driven it sure missed a lot of chances to get deep :P

* * *

This episode really does feel ahead of its time just for all the grimy industrial places they go to and working with demons, moral compromises etc … this was way back when it was actually sort of still surprising/new for this sort of thing. 

I mean, I did most of this rewatch before season 11 aired, so I was much more in the whole season 10 mindset constantly recoiling in horror at their early interactions, and Dean and Crowley have thankfully not gone on a single date in season 11, but even as the air clears in current canon, I can’t help thinking about how this is all one long process of descent until it’s not even weird to phone Crowley. I mean even in 11x09 they still phoned him up for help, but at least they met in a sketchy outdoor zone instead of Crowley shuffling up to join Dean in a skeevy bar. Slowly slowly backtracking to these inglorious times where they’d pull up beside a steaming powerplant and trade 10 rounds of insults with the demon lacky and really genuinely feel dirty about doing this.

* * *

Well okay Sam is still soulless so I guess Dean is dropping his guard and including Sam in his snark again, like they’re totally on the same team. Maybe it’s just the sharp divide between them, even with Sam soulless, and the demons. But anyway! Banter! Winchester shade thrown at demons! All the good stuff :P

* * *

They’re staying in what seems to be creepy shack with boarded up windows, which historically is linked expressly to problems with Sam, and show his emotional issues. Or lack thereof in this case. In any case all the Sam stuff is on the table right now I think, but this episode is the last one before Soulless!Sam goes after Bobby with an axe or whatever it was, and so at the very least this episode makes him creepy as hell, antagonistic to the point of making season 6 Cas act like a team player, and generally finally giving us a real turn around on how he’s not just cute but this is bad and we need Sam back already.

* * *

I’m not sure I mentioned in my 6x09 rewatch (which I literally read an hour ago - hi it’s been a few months but I’m still a mess :P) about the then upcoming line Dean just said about a “daily rape shower” although I think I was talking in general about this uncomfortable theme connected to them. Gamble Era as a whole is definitely to my memory the one with the most overt mentions and implications. One of the other reasons I always end up crawling through season 6. >.>

* * *

Aaaah Dean pours beer in a mug. I do not trust him holding mugs any more. I always thought that meant coffee. I feel betrayed.

Who drinks beer out of a mug

* * *

people who don’t check behind the door when they go in a room and see their brother knocked out on the floor and no one else around

* * *

*waves at Meg*

This episode alone is responsible for most of my amusement/sadness that they never found a story for her. She literally does not come back until 7x17 after this. I honestly thought she’d died in 5x10 after Cas stomped over her in the holy oil, because the writers also found no place for her in the rest of the apocalypse and you’d have thought a named demon on the ground who was not Lucifer but on his side would have been useful at least once or twice? For example, as a Horseman Wrangler or something. She was the main face of the bad guys in season 1!

This episode is also the singular source of my frustration that Meg could have had a real go at Crowley’s throne and even beaten him to it between seasons to keep Crowley in the scrappy unwilling accomplice role instead of making Sam and Dean HIS unwilling accomplices, when his dynamic with them worked so well in season 5, and if Meg was going to come back, then she was the last standing highest ranking demon we knew of. She got to just hang out with Lucifer! 

I’ve lived with this a long time >.>

I don’t even like Meg a great deal compared to other stand out female villains like Abaddon or Rowena (mostly because of this shoddy treatment in the plot with a side order of her remaining unredeemable about killing their friends and family and sexually assaulting everyone she comes into contact with, but that describes Abaddon too, she just had a slightly better run at being a main plot threat, until she didn’t :P I guess being plot-relevant gives you passes because even though Meg is worst in season 1, it’s my favourite season for her) but it seems to be my lot in life to fight for the fact the narrative of this show utterly screwed her over as a character with any potential or use, and that goes right back to season 2. You know, where they did exactly this with Born Under a Bad Sign: dropped Meg back onto the playing board and set her loose at the end, and then never, ever followed up because she wasn’t back until 5x01, and in the grand scheme, neither that episode or this or, in the end, 8x17, had any long term consequence even in their own season for Meg’s presence in the episode. She has a whole lot of personality but nothing to do with it >.>

(I mean, I think Meg is great as a villain in season 1 when she had a whole bunch of episodes and was treated as a real threat and had agency and power - even Rowena who was perpetually in chains got more done in that time than Meg did in many seasons of popping up at random technically a free agent but never with any sign she was accomplishing anything for herself.)

Anyway that’s basically what this conversation is: Meg makes a big talk, Sam points out she’s terrified of Crowley, despite the fact she came in trying to find him… Seems like her random minions are like the only other 2 demons on her side, so she’s passed over a year kind of waffling around not doing anything, or we missed a great fight for the throne that they never elaborate on, because Crowley has no time to mention warring with Meg at any other point in the season because she’s not worth a mention…

This episode could actually happen entirely without Meg except that she’s the spark to inspire them to go after Crowley - I mean obviously she has some presence within all the action, but that’s because it was built around her being in the episode. In the longer plot, this is a random appearance and then belatedly disappointing that nothing else ever came of it. 

(I think I could have been inspired to like Meg outside of season 1 a lot more if she’d been allowed more to do. Getting like 3 whole episodes at the end of season 7 by that point just highlighted how little she had to do with herself, and 2 seasons away from when she should have been doing anything >.> Maybe it was just a hang up from season 3 and the perceived fandom backlash against female characters that it made Crowley the more appealing choice for a new long-term villain, but essentially from a writing POV, Meg was the much longer established antagonist emotionally (and Crowley had not previously been an antagonist ever) but they were essentially interchangeable to pick a demon villain to ascend the throne and offer a different sort of antagonism, which is  _why_  Meg has this antagonism against him - they were competing for the same role in the story in a meta way too… I dunno I TALK ABOUT THIS SO MUCH but the writing of Meg always leaves me feeling like I should go check on my side characters and make sure I’m using them properly because it’s such a let down when they aren’t?)

* * *

Anyway then Sam does the thing which made me almost bite through my cheek when the promo of 11x14 never mentioned Raiders of the Lost Ark because I mean  _seriously_  did the Hell trauma erase some of his pop culture or something??? it all got siphoned off into Hallucifer and flushed away????

* * *

*pauses to sob loudly at the sight of Cas because I was not prepared*

He’s so angry and intense

*reaches out to reverently fluff his hair*

* * *

Cas’s eye squint when Sam says “I can’t believe you fell for that” is probably one of his best, but it’s very quick and in the dark so I never see it giffed

also because everyone gifs “will you, boy?” because honestly how did Sam not just catch fire and die then and there

perks of being soulless

* * *

Sam and Cas’s argument here is actually pretty dramatic. Cas at this point knows Sam is soulless and his instinct on meeting restored Sam is to offer a HUG. Like wow that was a thing from Cas back in the day :P But in the mean time he fluffs up all his feathers until his true form was probably one of those hilarious bird orbs of feathers, steps right into Sam’s space, and makes a dominance display that honestly probably would have killed Dean to witness it or have it directed at him. And Sam doesn’t step down. Until he freaks out CAS.

He gets one more head tilty squint, but Cas is at a disadvantage in the long game, being as he’s the one who raised Sam wrong and so with it all stacked against him, Sam wins, not because he threatened Cas, but because Cas gives in and aware that Sam is right in a way he doesn’t actually understand, is morally obliged to help.

Remember when I was sobbing about Dean and Cas fighting in 6x06 about “you used to be human, or like one?” 

Them making Cas help in these episodes is not so much about “just” using Cas as a tool, but showing some very interesting light on Cas’s situation about how he is reluctant to help or whatever not because he doesn’t care (though there are a fair few parallels between him and Soulless!Sam, not least the both of them plying Dean with drink during awkward conversations and enabling his coping mechanisms as much as causing the need for him to have them in the first place :P) but actually showing traps where Cas cares too much. He could have carried on ignoring Dean asking for help, or fucked off as soon as he realised Sam tricked him, but he is genuinely invested in Sam being broken and not just from guilt, but from care, and so he ends up trapped doing a milk run like this episode instead of fighting his war.

* * *

Dean’s amazement about Cas showing up is awful. Mostly because he’s indirectly telling Cas how annoyed he is Cas hasn’t been showing up (not even to, like, chat and have a beer. Re-reading my rewatches has also reminded me Dean spent a year having a beer every single friggin’ day with Sid, his neighbour, so there’s an actual void in Dean’s life of the fact he clearly needs someone to chat to about crap and Sam is clearly the crap Dean would be talking about like this… Seeing as how 6x06 and 6x07 didn’t do a great deal to convince Dean that Cas had pulled through and was back to being viable emotional support (as they clearly were to each other in season 4 and 5) he’s regressed to losing faith in Cas’ reliability and he’s not doing it quietly because his feelings are hurt. >.> I love/hate the moments when they sulk at each other like this.

* * *

Anyway Sam does not sound suspicious at all when he says it’s no big deal and Cas just wanted to help because they’ll all best friends!!! 

I’m fairly sure he utterly missed the emotional nuance of Cas agreeing to help and thinks he’s threatened him into helping

* * *

Anyway yay Cas doing magic

briefly. Aw. I like when he does magic.

The way the spell didn’t work, though, does seem to imply impotence on Cas’s part? (it fizzles out and Cas is grumpily like “it’s not working”) Which is interesting just to wonder (as I often do) about the writing of Cas in this episode… I mean, I’m deeply un-fond of it as a whole but it’s quite the rollercoaster. Ups and down. *clears throat* Setting aside how I find the entire thing kind of extremely weird and uncomfortable, we have Cas vs Sam, and how I described Cas giving in and coming to help them… Then it’s confusing how Cas may or may not know about Crowley’s project (but can’t just *take* them there) and even if he did know more about it, the spell not working could be a way to make them hopefully drop the issue (no such luck) or emphasise his lack of knowledge or even use to them… Although they still don’t let him off that easily. Or he may genuinely not know how to find Crowley, and until plot drama forces them to spend more time together he’s been as distant to Crowley as the Winchesters as he genuinely is too busy, and everything has sort of spiralled out of his control while he’s not been around, in which case this is genuine impotence as far as being on top of things or even knowing for sure what Crowley’s up to. 

And then right after all this we have Cas unhelpfully sitting around squinting angrily at the TV watching porn, and further into the episode, his dominance display against Meg as well after she kisses him to get what she wants and he retaliates… I’m not sure I like any of this as Cas writing per say especially since literally no other episodes use him like this, but the story within it might be interesting just as an expression of the turmoil he’s going through this season and his own struggles with the main plot… I dunno :P 

For now, he’s lost one battle against Sam, and had his spell to find Crowley fizzle out in front of them… 

* * *

Anyway then they move on to trying to get Samuel to help them after he catches them snooping… This whole first third of the episode is basically just a resource gathering mission to collect up side characters to help them mount an attack on Crowley. Like, sort of going through everyone’s motives. In this case Dean sends Cas away so they can talk privately with Samuel apparently for family reasons. But really apparently so Cas misses Dean saying it’s not worth selling your soul to save your family, because, you know, he’d take that personally because that’s how he met Dean ;) Sam would too because he’s still in the room but you know, handily doesn’t  _have_ a soul to take it personally with.

Okay no I have no idea why they sent Cas away. I continue to be unfond of this writer/episode so maybe just because he didn’t know how to handle Cas being in the same room as a family conversation like this :P I’m curious about what part of Dean feeling he had to make an emotional appeal to Samuel to help them he didn’t want Cas to see though. Maybe it’s just because he has to express some vulnerability here in order to talk about family and he’s still in a strop with Cas so he doesn’t want to express that in front of him.

I’ve already gone over in other episodes how showing vulnerability in front of Samuel is a terrible idea. :P

* * *

I wonder how Mary WOULD have taken all this. They keep invoking her opinion as if she were this absolute moral beacon but she did um sell out Sam to a demon which in the very long long run is why he has this soulessness problem in the first place.

I think Dean saying “learn from our mistakes” combined with how he reminds Samuel of Mary all kind of makes me think she’d be saying the same thing.

I did think it was suspicious earlier in the season how they were polishing up her image

* * *

Honestly the one thing that I can get out of the porno scene which isn’t just blatantly using Cas as the butt of the joke (argh it’s worse than I remembered) is the thought that they called down Cas to continue helping them, Sam and Dean seem to be researching, and Cas clearly could not be fucked to help them and just sat himself down and turned on the TV in protest, like this is a waste of my time, this is a waste of  _your_  time, why does your creepy shack even have working electricity and a television connection, and does this thing get the weather channel?

* * *

I think they might be waiting for Meg rather than researching but anyway did they even give Samuel their address

how does everyone know which creepy shack the Winchesters are hanging out in?

maybe it’s the same creepy shack Sam took Dean to in 6x01. Maybe this is their “bunker” of the season and Dean has hooked it up with a TV. 

* * *

which would explain the porn

* * *

Meg accuses them of having abandonment issues which is honestly probably the truest thing she’s said all episode

* * *

Oh she stole Ruby’s knife from them earlier. And then she steals Cas’s sword in a bit. Meg’s all about taking the phallic objects from the boys >.>

* * *

Honestly why am I even prodding this level of the subtext in the episode I know how it’s going to make me roll my eyes before I even start :P

* * *

Especially with Samuel saying he’d be soft for working with them and helping them, there seems to be a whole thread about being emasculated working for people you don’t want to be from the very first scene of Dean and Sam hating working for the demons, and Cas being bullied into helping them and his spell not working…

Honestly it is the right sort of atmosphere where if the characters are picking up on this, Cas’s alternating between this and two of the biggest dominance displays he has (”will you, boy” and kissing Meg) in the whole show kind of makes a lot of sense…

(I just really don’t like this episode’s atmosphere :P No one comes out of it looking good.)

* * *

Well okay Meg would appear to be a clear victor in all this just because she was always awful so she’s on her home turf and free to do BAMF stuff and get personal victories that align with theirs and generally be shooting up unlike the others in these terms :P Like even when Cas kisses her for his own satisfaction she blatantly wins either way. or they “kill” Crowley for their own motives and she wins either way how it goes for them.

but belatedly after years it occurs to me that if she were fighting Crowley for the throne, and then Cas “kills” Crowley this episode, that she should have won except she obviously did not start ruling Hell and she also didn’t come tell them at any point that Crowley was still alive, which, understandably she hates them so she probably wouldn’t, but is still annoying just because of all my reasons of resentfully feeling wronged on Meg’s behalf re: Crowley and here’s something else where she ostensibly has a really interesting story except that there’s no story. :P

* * *

I DID NOT EXPECT TO WATCH THIS EPISODE GETTING UPSET ABOUT MEG

* * *

Ooh I forgot Dean calls Cas out on just sitting at the side of the room getting points for attendance and nothing else. I guess he really was shittily watching the TV out of petulance so yay headcanon confirmed. :P

I also forgot there was a one on one Destiel conversation in this episode at all although it all seems to be about Sam’s soul for the sake of Soulless!Sam overhearing mom and dad talking.

* * *

Cas describes how terrible it will be for Sam to get his soul back and how bad it will be for him, and then Dean says “if he’s not fine, then you fix him” “Dean I wouldn’t even know where to begin” “then you figure it out Cas”

*stares blankly into 7x17*

Of course Cas already feels some of the blame now but this is pre 6x20 and pre Cas breaking Sam’s wall and basically pre anything where the blame would be on Cas from Dean’s POV, so he’s just telling Cas this now, in anger, because he thinks that Cas can do it, and he’s trying to pep talk Cas into helping them and maybe seeing Cas being unwilling to help as him being deliberately unhelpful and whatever else about not caring that Dean has already been upset about all season… Of course Cas cares a LOT about this but Dean thinks Cas DOESN’T care about fixing Sam so this all sort of is a huge mess where Sam is between them even this early on? This thread isn’t resolved until the end of season 7, although here we can’t understand why this is so bad yet.

In this case Dean does get Cas to say “of course” and sort of give in and accept he’s going to help anyway no matter what, but he leaves one final warning about Sam suffering horrifically… I think in this case like with Cas agreeing to stick around at all with Sam earlier he’s given in for the same reason of wanting to help, but of course with Dean it’s much more complicated and the fact that Cas is making an emotional surrender is much more obvious.

* * *

Ugh. :P

* * *

Anyway Sam is lurking around the corner listening in so it makes me wonder if angels can sense people and things by their souls more than anything since he can be aware of people in close proximity at other times… Or did he just kind of hope that Sam heard the warning too?

* * *

Action half of the episode! \o/

* * *

*feels bad for the djinn who was the monster in 6x01* 

* * *

Oh hey there’s Cas running in this. Unfortunately in a group shot where it’s hard to really see how silly or not his running is, although I will take a bet that it was silly running.

I’m glad they had a moment to focus on Dean looking scared of hellhounds, anyway. 

Meg’s no-care eyebrow lifting is the best thing. Her offering to leave her meatsuit to get eaten is not. >.>

* * *

I still don’t fully understand why the kissing scene was strictly necessary even if it’s been analysed to death in the fandom from the character POV :P Like what was the long view on this whole episode and the choices for writing Cas in it? I can’t get past a certain feeling that it pretty much started as “lol he should kiss Meg just to have some action in his life” and that makes me very grumpily predisposed towards the rest of it.

* * *

(Like overall this episode does actually reaffirm ace!Cas more than anything by his general confusion between love/sex and his bafflement about Dean suggesting he have a bit of time with Meg, so I’m not even mad about it like it’s easy to be with 9x03, because it’s actually a source that objectively supports the reading, just… it all feels really weird and uncomfortable and I don’t like it because it all seems to be picking on Cas, and the entire episode as a whole with all the other stuff thrown is just feels skeevy so taking the Cas stuff on good faith is hard >.>

* * *

Huh I just realised that Samuel’s banishing is not the usual angel banishing spell.

Guess either old Campbell knowledge, or Crowley brought him up to speed and taught him some stuff not from the standard textbook

* * *

Is this the first time Crowley earnestly is cool with the Winchesters being killed?

Is this the  _only_  time Crowley is earnestly cool with the Winchesters being killed?

* * *

Samuel and Dean have it out. Finally. :P It is AMAZING how much trouble Dean has with elder male figures in his family. This time Samuel isn’t even possessed and it all goes to hell. Their fight is basically about prioritising the living over the dead, although tbh from an “effort involved” level Mary is a hell of a lot easier to resurrect than fetching Sam’s soul right now, I think :P 

Anyway since Samuel has already been dead for ages, is a man out of his time, and is harping on his dead daughter who has been dead probably half as long as he has, it all makes a very sorry metaphor for the older generation. 

* * *

Ah yeah Meg on the naked torture table. Who directed this? *stares directly into the camera*

* * *

Considering how much hellhound gore was on Meg, she could have started the Hell Trials then and there if she’d felt like it :P

* * *

*continues disliking this episode even louder when Dean is shoved in a room with two burly (vampires?) and left to make defensive shower rape jokes with himself cast as the victim before a commercial break*

* * *

Honestly Sam making the devil’s trap out of his own blood is only half as creepy as the smile, which is only half as creepy in turn of the demon discovering it by a drop of blood falling on his face, which of course goes right back to the pilot in Bad Sam Stuff.

Yep we need our Sam back now… 

* * *

“Dean Winchester’s behind you, meatsack”

this episode, for being terrible, has multiple of the most iconic moments of the sort you’d put the line on a mug or a t-shirt >.>

* * *

Is that another bloody devil’s trap on the ceiling. How tall is Sam? How much blood does he have spare?

* * *

Ooh yeah Crowley talking about getting Sam’s soul out of the cage. he always seems to be selling it a bit *too* well to just be lying? He talks quite earnestly about how difficult it was, while Cas later takes full credit without having even talked to Crowley yet about anything.

(Weekend at Bobby’s has Crowley show up again immediately after the apocalypse… it’s practically an ALIBI :P Again with the not asking Bobby for important info, like who the current King of Hell is!)

I mean obviously the retcon is that he was lying and Cas did it, and Crowley, who has been working with him, knew enough to say he did it to protect his secret business partner, but it’s dubious what they all knew and had agreed to right now, making the delivery of this a shade too surface level even when Crowley protests that there’s always a chance he might be lying.

(I kind of am inclined to think without having ever heard otherwise, that Crowley killed off here was like Cas in season 7 and they kind of meant it)

* * *

Dean gives Meg the knife to kill Crowley meaning, I think we’re up to 4.5 and 2.5 serious attempts to murder Crowley from the Winchesters, vs 1 attempt from Crowley to kill them?

* * *

“This is for Lucifer” says Meg oh god 

I am so sad she didn’t make it to season 11 :P

* * *

Cas shows up just in time to save her, and somehow I feel like he was waiting for a dramatic entrance

* * *

Like we know for a fact by the end of the season he has a habit of being invisible around his friends and since this is an extremely fraught situation he could have waited for Crowley to say his bit to make sure he WOULD and then appeared

Or appeared just in time to interrupt Crowley if he started to suggest that Cas was the only one who’d dare sneak into the cage and borrow Sam back from Lucifer in the first place

* * *

“haven’t seen you all season” hahahaha

pfft

* * *

This is also sad because I like the idea of Cas being so ruthless that he’s scaring Crowley for real: “if I can help out in any  _other_  -” like, Crowley knows as soon as Cas knows he’s useless, he’s dead, and this is as close to bargaining as he gets…

… except this is retroactively all a stage play between them >.>

* * *

Also it was SO COOL when he did the thing where he sets Crowley on fire

* * *

OH WELL

* * *

At least Cas then has that one honest moment at the end of this (well I think he was honest emotionally about Sam’s soul earlier because he really did not want to hurt Sam any more than he was already damaged and felt bad about that too) but he admits the war is going crappily and then we have that line “I wish circumstances were different. Much of the time I’d rather be here” and aaaaargh. 

There are so many sad things Cas says but this is one of the worst. :P Especially since Dean has been sulking at him all episode/season for not being around, Cas admitting he would prefer to be spending time with them is pretty big. I think Dean may let him off the hook a little after this as far as I remember but also because he “fixes” Sam himself next episode so this tension about Sam between them is resolved for the time being pretty much until “wait Cas did you bring me back soulless on  _purpose”_  and it just goes back to being the angel war problem… 

I just get so emotional about Cas admitting he’d prefer to hang out with his friends on Earth, and actually be there for them, which I think is another reason he didn’t fuck off right away - not just because of his secret obligation to this mission that they don’t know his responsibility for but because as much as he’s resented having to take time off from the angel war to help, he’s also  _enjoying_ being around them in any way they let him and perhaps he’s being quite contrary about it all >.> And thanks to 6x20 we know there’s a lot of having his cake and eating it for a while whenever he can this season, as he’s set up for a pride fall. It’s not exactly been fun for him here, but it’s still his preferred company? I don’t know. Obviously I don’t see him as the villain in a true sense but he’s bloody fascinating this season.

All I know is that this episode starts with Dean seemingly very sad Cas is not there as a friend and then at the end Cas is all sad he can’t be there as a friend, and the stuff between them is ridiculously star crossed. 

* * *

Anyway the fact Dean says there’s no need for apologies and they’re all friends and that’s how they leave off

*lays on the floor and sobs about season 6*

* * *

Aaand then Sam comes out pro no soul. 

* * *

Considering the subject matter, Sam says some stuff that is really pertinent to their endless saving each other - pointing out how they nearly got killed for what Sam thinks is a pointless effort to save him that could actually harm him, and then Dean says “you don’t know what you’re saying” and Sam is like “no I’m saying something you don’t like” and while Sam is saying he’s better off without a soul (not true we need our Sam >.>) it’s putting Dean in this position where he expressly does not have permission to put Sam’s soul back and a solid argument not to do it backed up by if not Crowley then Cas as a trusted friend who knows what he’s talking about in a way Dean can’t know

so of course this is the lead in to next episode where he sneakily goes off to do it.

Anyway Dean invokes power of attorney and there’s fallout from that, but one of the things about Gamble era is that Cas absorbs consequences: Sam’s wall is broken by him so it is not Dean’s fault in the long run that anything bad happens to Sam as a consequence of Dean’s decision to put his soul back, except in the sense that the pre-existing damage was in there because of Dean, and then in 7x17 Cas absorbs Sam’s suffering before Dean can do any stupid deals or anything himself, as part of his own character arc which of course is to me the most compelling part of Gamble era… But it does mean bro angst and stupid decisions are much more watered down, and the set up to this argument really doesn’t have the fall out it could have - it’s season 9 which demonstrates what this storyline COULD have been if Cas didn’t take the fall in the narrative for these decisions.

I’LL GET TO ALL THAT IF I EVER FINISH THIS REWATCH INSTEAD OF TAKING SIX MONTHS PER EPISODE

in a sign of good faith I’m gonna put the next episode on immediately :P


	11. 6x11

Or: this is quite possibly one of the episodes in my personal top ten for the entire show

… I feel like fangirling about Dean and Death or Dean and Tessa as some of my favourite dynamics on this show was not a good idea in the long run :P

* * *

Like… they were absolutely amazing

_but at what cost_

* * *

Remember when I said fresh fruit was actually a really terrible omen on this show? :P

* * *

This whole opening sequence is great… Dean coming into the shop and uncomfortable and uncertain… No Sam with him right after the last thing we saw was Sam walking off and Dean yelling after him to come back. Then we get Dr Roberts (haha Beatles reference? :P) bringing in a John Winchester mention which is  _never_ a good sign, and there’s basically no explanation for why Dean is doing all this until we meet Tessa again.

Also: Dean’s germphobe moment emphasising how uncomfortable he really is with all this, giving us some onscreen hesitance outside of say moral issues or fear for his own life (both of which he’s, eh, always a little loose on :P) but like even while he’s pretty much gambling on his life, he’s nervous of getting some serious infection :P

The fact I can’t remember if he discussed this with Bobby or not, but we’re seeing him enacting a really complicated and CLEVER plan and we see him all alone to do it, implying that he came up with it all by himself and it’s some serious out the box thinking to think of asking Death for help and then figuring out a way to do it…

In the recap before it lingers over John’s journal on the Reapers page we saw in Faith, which adding that the Doctor is an old acquaintance of John’s, and that Dean had memorised that book within like 3 episodes of the show with astounding photographic memory for the names and numbers in it, also implies that Dean got this idea in part from the journal, though we rarely see it on screen any more. I’d assume his excellent memory at work again. The Doctor mentions that his friendship with John was before he got his medical license revoked, for what we never know, although he’s perfectly happy to temporarily kill a guy who hands him enough cash and he must have been known in hunter circles, probably a recommendation John picked up himself… His change in circumstances reflects a fall from grace and desperate measures, and with the mention of John, casts this old acquaintance in a dishonoured and disillusioned position… So far this season we haven’t had a great deal of John mentions, but the discussion about his parenting that flared up in 6x02 over the baby and Dean’s treatment of Lisa and Ben is pretty critical, so I’m guessing applying these associations to John is not a long shot here… (And meanwhile Mary has been vindicated and purified in the narrative already… Belatedly remembering she literally shows up via Eve in 6x19. Hm. Thoughts to hold onto :P)

* * *

I kind of feel like Dr Roberts may have been practising Necromancy although that’s a bit too far out to lose your medical license over. On the other hand, his assistant is foreshadowing of Death showing up with her earring:

<http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/119278316678/honestly-the-most-interesting-character-in-the>

but in character ignoring this symbolic foreshadowing of the conversation Dean’s about to have, it does make you wonder about her choices for getting dressed in the morning and if they reflect what she does for a living :P 

* * *

(Also John had a whole thing with Dr Benton from 3x15 that was never fully explained as far as I remember, so who knows what random detour down research into necromancy he made :P)

* * *

The assistant is called Eva and I can’t work out if she is called so as foreshadowing for Eve or a mistake overlap of character names

I’m fairly certain it’s the dragon episode after this which ends with Eve being risen although now I’m confused if they know she’s called Eve until later.

* * *

*heart stops as I see Dean handing over a letter in case of emergency for Ben* Oh lord, I forgot I was in season 6 and this was a thing still :P (Interesting twist around on 5x18 where Dean writes his letter to Sam and Bobby then goes to Lisa and Ben - here he writes to Ben and says there’s nothing to say to Sam. Missing out Bobby entirely so until this episode reminds me or not if Bobby was always in on the plan, I’m going to have to assume he at least knows where Dean ran off to, if for no other reason than someone needs to distract Sam for a bit :P)

Anyway Dean owes Ben an apology for the vampire shoving still, while he’s talked things out and ended it with Lisa so at least is in more of a finished state with her even if it’s a  _painful_  finished state. There’s also his own casting as a father figure to Ben, which when we’re starting an episode with a John reference, just reminds us that it was implied all over the place that Dean’s time with Lisa and Ben crashed and burned because he got too much like John. (And it’s terrible to carry over that metaphor just from how he kept them on lock down when he was worried, to him coming home “under the influence” as it were as a vampire, and shoving Ben, or later when Lisa gets stabbed, the whole thing with him slapping Ben and handing him a gun… Aaargh.

I suppose also worth noting that Dean crashes and burns in this episode for not wanting to hurt a child even at this extreme of it just being the natural order and her right time to die… all sorts of parental instinct Dean happening here

*lays on the floor and makes a high pitched whining noise*

* * *

Meanwhile Eva is manhandling Dean and then he dies.

Like, how often has he died just in the time before the cold open is over. :P

* * *

I feel like I should make a shout out for how green and yellow this opening section is.

Green is good because it brings out Dean’s eyes like nothing else

but bad because the colour association in environments like artificial indoor areas is like, poison, danger, toxic etc…. Well emphasised by Dean making superficial gestures of demonstrating how it’s not clean here, and just straight up mentioning it. Not only is he in a dangerous situation, but he’s making a bad decision based on last episode, and striking out alone to do something risky and OTT for the sake of keeping Sam alive and fixing him. In season 9 he takes SERIOUS repercussions for it (as I was writing at the end of last episode) but here in season 6 the fall out is so much less terrible that I think later canon has ruined the threat of the moment :P In any case, it IS a toxic codependency decision with a direct mirror in the Gadreel decision, but with all this hindsight it comes as more of a warning of the path he could go down, and warns him about making these sort of decisions more as general life advice.

And like, only Dean Winchester would be getting general life advice about not doing dangerous/sneaky shit to save your brother via alarming supernatural means, and for it to be something that actually comes up again and again…

… (only Dean would the message of this episode not stick >.>)

* * *

Blah blah blah I managed to lose my progress up to 15 minutes into the episode from this not-even-out-the-cold-open place from last night

tl:dr:

* * *

Tessa <3

I always love how she stands her ground. Even when I rewatch this twice in one day

Death said “hello Dean”

totally and utterly pwns Dean

“now that we’ve established that you have hubris and no leverage” Aaaaaaargh

Dean is on a spiritual quest and Death being like “I want you to be me for a day” is my favourite trope ever in anything (says someone who wrote book 8 of her series as a job offer from Death to the main character shh spoilers :P)

the foolish mortal is set up to lose… In some stories they’re a dick and get what’s coming to them… In others like this, the only way to WIN is to be human and fuck up because you CAN’T work flawlessly to Death’s standards

This was all just a character reference for Dean and the fact that he failed is the reason why Death gave Sam his soul back

Basically, not “out of the goodness of his heart” as Bobby queries his motives, but because he’s seen the goodness in Dean’s heart

I think the seeds were planted in 5x21 but Death has been waiting for a reason to come back into contact with Dean in due course - of course, he could wait out Dean’s natural life and take the ring back if nothing came up, but something WOULD and here it is and the ring was a calling card

(I don’t think this was a job offer of course, but it was Death testing Dean on a level no average mortal gets tested on… we’re on the flip side of Destiny here in season 6 and there’s specifically an episode about that coming up with the Titanic episode. I think this reverbrates as far up the food chain as Death for a “what next” and Dean as the main agent of not-Fate here, is right in the centre of the whirlpool around changed times)

(But thinking of job offers, while I’m 110% behind Billie as the new Death in season 11, I am fascinated that Dean’s just as easily described as dressing like Death with the long black coat we see a few times in season 11…)

* * *

Lol Dean saying that Death is one of the few things that can break Lucifer’s cage

Still bothered by how he was set up in 5x21 as the duality to God but then they decided God needed another duality and so they introduced Teh Darkness, and un-dualled Death from God

Anyways since Dean is his fave and Dean would have probs immediately asked him to kill Amara for them, since he’s on the books as being able to reap God, I suppose if they had any idea of anything between 10x23 and 11x01 it would have been sensible to take him off the chessboard even though I’d kind of been seeing him and God as the 2 kings either side >.>

(belatedly re-reading for typos before posting: If Dean was Death’s fave and Death and God were in a duality pissing match like Amara and God for season 11… Cas is named as God’s fave in season 11… Like imagine the other version of this season… Daaaaamnn what would even be happening at this point in fake season 11??)

* * *

“Nothing lasts forever… well I do”

* * *

Comparing Sam’s wall to drywall as a way of understanding the situation and then summing it up as “if or when it collapses, he’s done … YEAH LET’S DO IT WHAT COULD GO WRONG”

Dean taking an obvious risk of 5 minutes of functioning brother over lifetime of weird soulless brother who is not-Sam

(paired with the shattering wall title card)

and then cut to Sam and Dean arguing about the solution Dean has found

* * *

I am pretty sure Death knew exactly when Dean was going to un-die so he said “because” just to fuckin’ troll Dean

* * *

Bobby’s blank horror watching the argument is hilarious… he doesn’t weigh in until he has a point to raise that is nothing to do with the meat of the bro fight… Just… not touching that one with a bargepole.

This is a really nice shot of Sam:

There’s still sort of a yellow-ish and green theme going here. (Bobby is wearing yellow-ish, and Dean is in green… Sam as he often does, wears neutral brown, which he has always done when not getting thematically involved in stuff since season 1 :P 

Also the cars around him are all pointedly hollow and empty because he is

He does seem to be doing something sneaky to go dig the ring up to stop Dean, but Dean has already sneakily dug it up before he even told them about the plan in the first place, meaning Dean is still top sneaker of this episode

* * *

Dean says he knows what he’s doing and he’s not going to let Sam get hurt, even though with Death he pretty much made it very clear that he knew it was a horrific risk and he was going it anyway.

* * *

Bobby has to contemplate locking Sam in the panic room again, which is pretty distressing because of how often the panic room has been used to contain Sam over the last 2 seasons before this… considering past trauma and because Soulless!Sam is promising not to be sneaky right now (pfft) I will give Bobby a pass on this because of his history with this.

(In 4x21 wasn’t it Bobby worried they might be killing Sam and Dean having a “better he dies human” moment once again exercising his power of attorney over Sam and making decisions for him at great risk to Sam’s life…)

* * *

Dean puts on the ring with a light hovering over his shoulder, and nothing hovering over his other shoulder… Considering the episode is a moral spiritual journey type thing for Dean, having shoulder angels with no demon foreshadows that he’s going to be making moral choices for good here…. Even if he is a bit vindictive about his first targets being “justified” deaths :P

In a way this arc vindicates his power of attorney over Sam arc: Dean is given power over life and death with them, and he’s playing with life and death with Sam. Death gives Dean a pass for his actions here, done out of the goodness of his heart (to use Bobby’s phrasing about Death’s motives on Dean) and since he demonstrated strength of character by then sucking it up and obeying the natural order, Dean’s fuck ups along the way are forgiven because he did the correct thing eventually, even with extra collateral damage along the way. 

… Like we know long term this lesson does NOT stick to Dean as he continues messing with the natural order, and Death indulging him probably only makes it worse instead of using this as a harsh truth :P I feel like some mixed signals here: although Death seems to read Dean very well, perhaps he assumed the lesson and quest he puts Dean on is enough to affect character development and this was a reward? 

I’m going to blame Death for subtly giving Dean permission to keep on saving Sam via this episode. >.>

* * *

Tessa says they’re letting any old slack jawed haircut be Death these days and Dean turns around to look at her like

* * *

I laughed.

* * *

She tells him that they need to stick to the rules, which is a delightfully Tessa thing, and tells him he has a history of throwing a wrench in the works, which is the other season 6 message - compare this to the Titanic episode which I can’t remember if I was talking about that one here or in the deleted version - hang on - yeah, it was this version :P Compare Tessa and Atropos and you find a similar sentiment: fed up agents of the natural order who are thrown for a loop by Team Free Will tearing up the pages. The theme of course comes around to land on Cas, but for now Dean’s seeing some random judgement for it.

* * *

Aaaand that’s where I got up to before Tumblr devoured most of this post :P

* * *

Gosh I wuv Tessa.

* * *

Sam takes the Impala and drives off to a spooky abandoned warehouse to summon Balthazar

for some reason I had the strong feeling he did it in Bobby’s basement as per summoning Ruby in 3x16. 

I suppose there’s still a story parallel here, since her advice was to use his powers to defeat Lilith last moment, and basically embrace the darkness in him, whereas Sam here ends up asking for advice which results in “well Patricide can’t hurt” :P

* * *

Oh good it’s Balthazar who is the first one to actually voice out loud re: Sam’s soul, that “Michael and Lucifer are hate-banging it right now”

Was wondering when someone would first get around to saying this >.> Thought it might not be until Hallucifer but that seemed odd considering how many references there are to rape in season 6

(This is also the dialogue where he calls Cas Sam’s boyfriend, although at least in this case I’ve always absolutely taken this as a jealousy thing and as him sort of painting the Winchesters with one brush, just understanding that Cas has his loyalties divided.

In fact, since we don’t know at this point that they’re working together but we will later, and soon, this offers motive in hindsight: Balthazar screwing over the pets Cas has who have distracted him (such as taking him away for an entire day just the previous episode) and although actually in the long term succeeding with sabotaging Sam probably would have lost him even more Cas time - if Cas didn’t actually find out Balthazar said to do it even - right in the here and now it’s a sort of feel good petty thing to do :P)

* * *

“I’ll do it for free” Yeah.

Also he cites both Sam working for him, and getting one over on Dean. 

The personal motivation is against Dean rather than Sam - or at least he understands Soulless!Sam is kind of pointless to hold a grudge against anyway :P So we get one last minute Sam as a blunt little instrument bit (ha ha sorry I am Dean!girl through and through yes this is just giving me pain about how Dean by default is parallel to soulless Sam… I can’t help these emotions >.>)

And possibly some more emphasis on the extremely sketchily drawn love triangle between Cas, Balthy and The Winchesters as being a Cas, Balthy and Dean thing with Sam an accessory to the crime and nothing more.

(I’ve seen plenty of meta explaining how this is queercoding Cas to make him more evil as with demon!Dean and Crowley, and bleh to that, but on the other hand he pulled through, so in hindsight nyer to that, it’s subtext to play with and fuck The Man :P)

* * *

“You need the blood of your father, but your father needn’t be blood.”

Ahahahahahahahhhhaaaa

it’s literally his most iconic line ([x](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/124535283178/fractioussam-the-supernatural-gif-challenge))

Also: another reason my brain presumably glitched into thinking this was the same location as 3x16

* * *

Okay no there is Too Much Yellow in the backgrounds of EVERY Dean and Tessa shot for this to be random. It’s clearly a warning for Dean. Or whatever Yellow means in this context of colour coding. I was taking lurid orange as a warning for Dean earlier in the season.

* * *

“They can’t see you, they can’t hear you, just… let this play out.”

Dean hates being a witness to things he can’t fix >.>

In this case though! Season 11 is making him sit to the sidelines as a main plot point, and he did learn how to do it here, as part of his indoctrination into being true neutral instead of lawful/chaotic good (I can’t be bothered to have this discussion and type out all my thoughts here but I do sometimes see him as a fascinatingly messy, broken, lawful good :P His chafing with the natural order is just one thing as he has very strict rules about who good people are and who deserves life and death meaning he has one hell of a powerful inner rule book he operates from) 

Anyway, Amara is chaotic neutral/evil depending on how the show plays her (she started neutral and is slipping) but it’s another Dean vs a force of nature he has to just let play out in Sam and Cas(ifer)’s fight against her.

One of my main speculations is God getting involved again and Amara and God merging, which would be something everyone sits on the sidelines to watch, even if TFW are the agents of enabling the scenario or something. 

I dunno. Interesting that Dean has forced passivity about saving people here, when it was the theme of the last few episodes we’ve had in current canon, starting with 11x13

* * *

I don’t like how the heart attack businessman has has superficial dressing similarity to Cas, being a dude in a beige trenchcoat and a striped tie (I know I know the striped tie is a season 9 thing)

Anyways, Dean displays some of his own passing similarities with Death, having a moment of bonding with this dude over his extra cheese on the pizza and asking where he got it. 

If we take the guy as a Cas mirror then him eating human food and dying for it is kind of… Cas’s arc. Loving humanity. Coming up for a fall. Bonding with Dean and would love to go on a pizza date with him probably :P If we have Balthy off in the previous scene bitter about Dean taking Cas’s attention then I’m allowing myself this reading

* * *

pfft life is all just dust in the wind

duuuust in the wiiiiii~iiiind

* * *

there’s no “just” when it’s this show :P

* * *

Soulless Sam never learned that “no biggie” is the worst tell. Like, last episode with him pretending he didn’t threaten Cas into helping them. No wonder Bobby is immediately 100% suspicious.

* * *

Sam, you may not know this with your current problems, but literally no one says “no biggie” and means it, it’s always code for “yes, huge biggie.”

* * *

Then he and Bobby sit down to play poker, which calls back the poker witch episode, and also reminds us that if Sam has shitty tells with no soul, Bobby is totes onto him. >.>

No patricide in THIS house, son.

* * *

Aaand we get to the hospital after 2 easy kills.

It’s almost hilarious how the episode will always have the turning point exactly 20 minutes in thanks to ad breaks defining story structure.

* * *

Dean’s face is just heartbreak. :(

(I am just heartbreak)

* * *

Thinking of, she has a “serious heart condition” which is part of the endless ongoing heart thematic stuff in this show.

And of course in the Dean n Death subplot, we go from Faith to In My Time of Dying to here, connecting Dean and heart conditions and reapers (specifically Tessa) and his own bought time, time and again…

*rubs hands together in glee*

Death had to know he’d crack here

I assume he knew it for the sake of the whole teachable moment

Dean did not fail this mission.

* * *

“Well who tells [Death who to kill]?” 

“I don’t know, it just is. It’s destiny.” 

“Oh gimme a break, I spent my whole life fighting that crap. There’s no such thing as destiny, just like there was no apocalypse. Just a bunch of stuck-up mooks who didn’t want us human slaves asking questions. Well, I say the little girl lives.”

“Do you know what’s amazing? You don’t actually buy a word you’re saying.”

“Yes, I do.”

"Oh, really? So, all the times that you messed with life and death, they just worked out for you? It was just a beach party every time, huh?”

"Well, I know this much: I’m Death, she’s 12, and she’s not dying today.”

Oh DEAN.

So we’ve established Tessa as an agent of pissed off natural order, already well aware of Dean vs Destiny.

DEAN is taking the POV that because he “averted” it there was clearly never any set force greater than he was that was insisting the story happen that way, denying his own role in unravelling such a huge thing.

(Meanwhile future episodes will reveal an Actual Literal Agent Of Fate pissed with them, confirming that Dean is wrong, and he knows it as Tessa says, because he FELT the weight of it when he was fighting it, and of course the most important episode of the season has Cas doubling up on that, reminding us that the universe was set in stone until it wasn’t any more.)

Anyway, I think Dean can hold 2 contradictory stances at once (lord knows I do it and if you read this blog you see it in action every time I open my mouth :P) and in his heart know that Destiny is/was real and he broke it, and not allow himself to truly believe he was SUCH a powerful force in the universe that he could have had anything to do with unravelling the grand story. it’s a self esteem thing affecting his world view. :P And he wants to take the stand here that destiny isn’t just something to be fought, but clearly a nonsense concept, and so if the higher powers of the universe like Tessa tell him it just is because the universe says so, he has an example of when he was told that and then it wan’t.

AND YET that whole stance unravels his and TFW’s victory in season 5 and renders it bleak and meaningless in a sort of “shit happened” way… of course this is the world order that they’re imposing on the other side of the apocalypse and Cas in particular and 6x20 specifically is all about struggling with this wonky empty, teetering over a cliff of “what the fuck next?!” that comes living in such a bleak world.

And so in that world where nothing makes sense any more, Atropos is a deeply sympathetic character scrabbling to keep any order she can maintain in her personal sphere (… a Cas mirror, though they’re at odds) and Tessa is LUCKY that at least until season 9 her part of it stays much the same as ever: people keep dying, she keeps doing her thing as a psychopomp…

And HERE’S the largely unexplored tragedy of Tess in 9x22 when her world fell apart 3 years later than Atropos’s or Cas’s world fell apart… If she had been suffering along with them in season 6, she’d have fitted in as a powerful narrative mirror, and her death and everything around it would have meant so much more even with just the exact same scenes and dialogue around them?

I think it was a good, in character death, just wrong time, wrong place, and never given any of the weight or follow up it deserved, and the veil problem that existed vaguely in the background of season 9 just sort of tidied itself away…

*sighs loudly*

*continues bundling up the wasted characters of Supernatural into cotton wool for their own protection* :P

* * *

Bobby and Sam play poker in silence

* * *

It’s all fun and games until someone tries to brain their father figure with a wrench

* * *

Good old iconic Bobby lines

* * *

This is one of many billions of times Bobby is attacked in his own home.

Like, at this point I’m genuinely losing count, and rather than it being something thematic to its episodes it’s just its own trope like bro moments over the Impala or Dean n Cas staring too long 

* * *

Bobby makes the pop culture reference so Sam doesn’t have to, and Sam apologises while still smashing in the door. 

A good father figure would just let himself be murdered pfft *thinking of Mystery Spot and how Gabriel made Sam kill Bobby there for his revenge… which was turned around a bit because Sam really did earnestly think it was the Trickster…

Anyway, Sam does tend to get murdery with Bobby more than you’d expect :P

* * *

I do like how Soulless Sam is pretty easy to be reasoned with - like, he’s honestly not on a murder rampage in the way that he’s FILLED WITH MURDER LUST or whatever you could easily apply to demon!Dean coming at Sam with a hammer. Once Bobby has him trapped he sits down to rest and bide his time and has a perfectly civil conversation about why he needs to do it, his doubts about the spell, and his sense of identity as Souless!Sam being threatened, as well as the general concept of “Sam” being in danger from Dean’s attempt to save him

Honestly… much spookier than demon!Dean

* * *

Ooh I forget about Tessa’s “dammit I knew it” about the first accidental extra death Dean causes: the nurse walked through her and had a cold shudder and I know Tessa didn’t do that deliberately but you’d think that would be what marked her for death - but Tessa doesn’t seem like she was certain it would be her. It seems it was a sort of destiny thing… or was it???

* * *

Considering this set off a chain reaction, you think Dean would have accidentally set off dominoes (as Tessa says) that killed literally everyone?

I accidentally typoed “cain reaction” but TBH thinking about how he had plans to decimate the planet at one point, whoops?

* * *

Ooh Tessa says it’s just focussed on the girl.

Chaos and sadness follows the girl because she’s alive outside of her time

HMM SOUND LIKE ANYONE YOU KNOW?

…

they make their own monsters and apocalypses

* * *

Dean teleports off unsupervised

he’s awfully good at being a higher being >.>

* * *

I mean I think he sort of learned how to teleport in Death Takes a Holiday, if we go with the Dean n Death subplot that’s some good continuity? Or at least he mastered some basic practices of being in the spirit world/veil 

* * *

still had to drive when he was a demon though

loser

* * *

There’s a great big yellow rectangle of light behind him as he yells into the sky about how he lost and Sam’s screwed

* * *

With a side-order of him being stranded with no way to get back to Bobby’s because he took off the ring and can’t teleport

* * *

then he makes a conscious decision to put it back on to to talk to Tessa, and teleports himself back to the hospital to kill the girl

“unfinished business” he calls it

ARGH

I have a lot of feelings about Dean metaphorically as a ghost within the story, and it starts with Faith, and gets louder every time he dies.

* * *

I do wonder if he really got the point of the message here since Tessa was so down on him for failing, and he would agree with that just because… He would almost miss the worth in what he did?

This episode does so much for Dean but in the long run he also, well, doesn’t really substantially learn anything from it :P

* * *

This is the worst Dean and kids moment on the show *sobs*

His eyes remain unnaturally green this episode though

* * *

Dean cut it CLOSE with the saving Bobby from being murdered thing >.>

* * *

I do think the fact it showed Dean capable of prioritising random nice humans he didn’t think deserved it over a chance to save Sam is a good thing though. 

I guess :P

* * *

Like, shit happens because they’re always being put in situations where there’s a choice >.>

* * *

Death brings Dean food this time!

Bacon dogs.

He’s got geographical range, Dean has home cooking.

* * *

Is Death confessing to also sometimes not liking taking the sadder lives?

* * *

Haha Death said “behind the curtain” *refers to all those times Dean walked through the curtain metaphorically already this season*

Death drops honking great hints about the main plot of the season hoping detective!Dean will come out of hibernation and figure it out. 

detective!Dean has some serious blindspots when it comes to Cas being the perp

He also said souls were strong and valuable and at the start of the episodes he said they WEREN’T like pie

I feel like I should have said something about souls being compared to pie in Dean’s presence, especially when the first time Death tried to communicate to him it was through Karen Singer’s Zombie Pie.

* * *

I think Death likes Dean speaking to him so rudely even though he tells him off for it just for the novelty value that not many people would dare. He also expresses it by not answering Dean accusing him of it being rigged from the start, which is also true. :P So yeah.

I do love how Dean is legitimately terrified of Death though and just messes up with treating him like a casual acquaintance

he kind of stops being terrified when he actually wants Death to kill him later. But for the most part he remains terrified when they meet

* * *

I wish that the season had let Dean be a bit more detective!Dean about it but despite this being a Gamble episode, so you’d think she’d be setting up her plot, despite stuff happening with the souls all over, Sam and Dean get totally distracted by Eve until the Cas betrayal smacks them around the head and they have to clear up in the last few minutes of the season. Bah.

Detective!Dean is my favourite. And he does exist in many episodes, but there’s no real season-long plot for detective!Dean anywhere.

* * *

Anyway Death shows up with his creepy doctor bag full of glowy Sam

* * *

Sam’s so bright :’)

* * *

He’ll be fiiiine.

Perks of being an “affront to the balance of the universe”


	12. 6x12

I am so cold I have literally decided to start watching just in case typing warms me up

I suppose in that case fire-breathing monsters are welcome??

This episode is probably one of the more disappointing for MotW just because no, like, DRAGON dragons because budget, but we have to resentfully allow that it actually sets up more continuity for the rest of the season than you may have ever given it credit for and I have resented sitting here waiting for important plot threads to happen in it while also accepting that not skipping the episode means reminding myself that SPN has some of the worst dragons I’ve ever encountered

meanwhile this feeling is only made less grumpy by the fact that I spent the opening of the season feeling really passionate about the Lisa and Ben arc while having to accept that meant I was going to have to watch the mannequin episode to put together all the pieces of it

* * *

hi yes I have some issues with season 6 

* * *

Anyway is still recapping itself in the Road So Far montage

it implied fairies go to Purgatory which is wrong even for for this show :P

there’s a good amount of Cas talking in the recap because he was the one who delivered the most doomy news about Sam’s soul

also Dean getting twatted in the face by a fairy

* * *

I regret inserting that gif because I was ignoring the other screen because it’s got relentless lightning effects for the needlessly long cold open of the girl getting snatched out of the plane (NEARLY 4 MINUTES IN BEFORE STORY), and so I was looking at my laptop screen hunting around for my old gifs to AVOID the flashing

Oh well live and learn, I already had a migraine before I started 

* * *

Start with a ridiculous emphasis on Destiel hand porn

like

Dean’s fingers twitching nervously as the “LIKE A VIRGIN” title comes up, camera pans over to Cas’s hands as he emerges from the panic room pulling down his sleeve and adjusting the cuff after soul-fisting Sam off-screen.

I feel weirdly appreciative of the sequence and kind of tempted to go back and gif it

I’m not sure what it really says but I just really like how it was telling the story through their hands, all silent storytelling Dean the concerned parent, Cas acting as doctor to Sam…

Who directed this? 

WHY IS THE ANSWER ALWAYS PHIL SGRICCA EVERY TIME I ASK THAT?

* * *

well okay I know what I’m doing during the action sequences this episode :P *sets VLC player to capture the hand porn*

* * *

  


* * *

Aaaah man Dean and Cas are so pissy with each other. Season 6….

Dean is pissed off for ??? reasons, Cas is clearly pissed Dean did the thing anyway even though he expressly told him not to do it, and now Sam is hurt and Cas doesn’t think he’s ever going to wake up.

Like, well done, I have 3 friends in the universe and you broke one of them

…

he’s gonna go upstairs and hang out with Bobby like “fucking  _Winchesters”_

Bobby like “don’t look at me I didn’t tell Dean to do it”

(I remember in season 5 I got very attached to Bobby and Cas hanging out, and I know for 100% a fact they take angry smoke breaks together when the brothers get too much)

* * *

Cas is immune to smelling like cigarette smoke unless he wants to and I’m pretty sure A: Bobby’s house reeks, and B: Cas probably also smelled like stale smoke through most of season 6 pretty much entirely out of grumpiness

sometimes he didn’t even smoke and he just started smelling that way

* * *

that’s just his personality this season

* * *

Anyway this is definitely one of their most intense confrontations this season. Cas basically exactly mirrors DEATH getting in Dean’s face, and not in a good way, because Dean looks roughly as terrified as when Death did it. Not shippy at all - Cas is in his face because he is ANGRY on Sam’s behalf and Dean is about as messed up as you’d expect for leaving Sam in a coma from his own actions, though he’s not shown drinking before Cas diagnosed him at least 

* * *

Like, I said the Sam plot was coming between Dean and Cas for these seasons, I kind of forgot about this part of it

I mean Sam gets better because the rest of this episode is a silly MotW but for now, ultimate marital discord caused by their conflict over Sam 

* * *

Here we go with the hard liquor and Bobby literally telling Dean it’s medicine. Healthy coping mechanisms!

Dean learns from the best father figures.

* * *

They settle in to distract themselves with a case and lament for Sam and then he just wanders in

HEY SAM 

Maaan he’s a year and a half out of the story, and sometimes I feel like no one really considers his side of things… But on the other hand, A: no one talks about season 6 much anyway, and B: Sam does eventually re assimilate soulless!Sam’s memories so he at least knows what he did and what was going on over that time…

Still, I kind of really relate to this because I have whole years of my life I’ve disassociated from (if you’ve been following me for long you’ll have seen me panicking about misplacing 2010/11, and when I get to my season 7 and 8 rewatch I’ll probably not shut up about how I have no remaining first impressions on like any episode except for Plucky Pennywhistle’s :P) Like, I can really understand misplacing a year or so, so I can really understand how weird it must be for Sam to have an amnesia year, which he won’t know about until Cas spills the beans a little later in the episode.

I think for now he just goes from Swan Song to here a year and a half later, assuming Dean did something terrible to rescue him? Hence forcing the issue with Cas.

* * *

Sam’s teary delight that everyone survived the apocalypse is going to kill me

I missed this dork

* * *

OH! They’re sitting at that table with the beers and Bobby standing at exactly the right angle where that photo came from in 10x03

Ouchies.

* * *

I haven’t been back here in a while… My hindsight goggles from previous watches only started as far forward as 9x18… Season 10 and 11 have added a LOT of reasons to be emotional about past seasons as they go tromping through them for old material

* * *

Anyway this is temporarily a reversal of 4x01 because Sam genuinely does not remember and his “wtf” and confusion when they ask what he remembers is genuine, while Dean was just traumatised by Hell and didn’t want to talk about it… I mean I think it may have taken a little while for the memories to sort themselves out as more than the random screaming and stuff we saw in flashes over 4x01, but oooh Dean knew that trauma was there. 

* * *

He just cites helping Death like Death did ALL the legwork

honestly he didn’t need to be so sketchy, he could have recounted all of Appointment in Samarra and just made it sound like the deal was for getting Sam back without specifying his carcass was wandering around fucking shit up for a year and a half. :P

 _Someone_  was going to tell him, although I suppose they think Crowley’s dead and so the only real candidates were Bobby cracking or Sam getting to Cas first

I can’t remember the mood of that scene now but based on the opening conversation and season 6 Cas in general, I am assuming he tells Sam out of spite knowing full well Dean didn’t want Sam to know what had been going on

* * *

Anyway meanwhile Bobby has concerns.

He and Dean talk over the same table as in 5x21 as far as I can tell. It seems to be their “have an argument about the goodness in Sam’s heart” table

aka this time Bobby is having actual trauma about the number of times Sam has attempted to murder him, and worrying it’s a character flaw.

Dean is just concerned telling Sam that his meatsuit is a murderer will break the nice glowy part of Sam that is friendly and likes hugs and crying a lot

* * *

(well I mean based on his 3 minutes of screen time so far this season :P)

* * *

“I’m sending Death a damn fruit basket!”

Dean has such a thing about giving Death food omg.

Try making him tamales, though. Pro tip from your future self ;)

* * *

Oh maaaan Dean’s EYES this season

* * *

LOOKIT SAM SMILING AND BEING SASSY IN A NON-SOULLESS WAY

Oh my gosh taking a 4 month break on season 6 right in the middle of the soulless Sam thing has apparently left more of a mark than it should have considering like literally the second to last episode in season 11 was one I enjoyed primarily for Sam being hilariously peppy and fun, like, I’m just saying, I’ve not been consciously  _deprived_  of him or anything

this is probably a writer thing where I do stuff like work on the same draft for 6 years and can just drop right in on a character who I am simultaneously working on 2 other stories from her POV and be in-character for the exact iteration I’m working on that day :P If I bookmark my place in a TV season then come back after ages apparently I pick up where I left off emotionally too 

* * *

Dean is pressuring him to stay home, rest up, and watch crappy cable TV which was basically what the advice was for Cas between 11x03-6 except Sam feels fine in a genuine way rather than the Winchester way of saying it but actually being seconds from dropping dead.

Which is sort of the problem for this part of the season, that Sam feels SO fine he’s not actually aware there’s potentially a not-fine thing about him and he IS seconds from dropping, as we see in a few episodes (oh man see above: complaint about the plot stuff happening in weird/terrible season 6 episodes :P)

so he actually suspects he had a clean, and therefore DODGY resurrection with the catch coming elsewhere (haha because there’s always a catch), instead of a sloppy, terrible path to becoming fully himself again with a ton of problems lying in wait, and Sam is waiting for a repercussion such as season 3, where in fact rather than Dean being sketchy JUST because he’s lying, it’s Dean being sketchy because he’s terrified Sam’s going to get hurt so soon

honestly at this point I think Dean would have gone for Sam retiring with a dog and a girl in a heartbeat because it would keep him from “scratching” the wall, as Death said.

* * *

Anyway then Bobby nopes out of being stuck between the Winchesters on a case when there is Looming Angst

and Dean has no good reason to tell Sam no, so…

(I like that Bobby used Rufus as an excuse but oh god have I managed to remind myself of literally every season 6 episode I don’t want to watch while typing this because that’s sad foreshadowing of Rufus’s continued, for now, existence before And Then There Were None)

* * *

meanwhile: while I was angsting about the show Sam is also looking for the problem… after a Classic MotW Discussion out of any episode Sam snaps and asks Dean what the loophole is

oh no wait he’s wondering what happened with Lisa

Never mind my heart is breaking

Dean dives behind music to hide from the conversation after saying it didn’t work out

because tbh I hate to point fingers but whether it would inevitably fall apart or not, it was directly Soulless Sam’s fault for the vampire thing which did cause it to happen in all the non-speculative versions of their story :P

* * *

Anyway MotW stuff *goes back to giffing*

* * *

(Dean’s so happy to have Sam back, and Sam is being sweet and sympathetic or at least not pulling weird soulless sam eyebrows which is enough of a difference to matter here)

* * *

SAM HAS A DESKTOP BACKGROUND AGAIN

It looks like a load of grey and greyer sharp geometric shapes weirdly reminiscent of the title card just if we’re making links

If I were watching as it aired I’d be so worried about Sam, since now we’re finally at the wall, this theme of shattering glass is linked to him.

(The motel is one of their generic hunter’s lodge style motel rooms, with pine tree dividers, mural on the wall, artfully shabby looking furniture, general feeling of paying for staying in a log cabin in town with air conditioning and tv I suppose :P They’ve stayed in a LOT with this theme over the years)

* * *

Dean acts shady with stealing diaries and reading them mockingly I swear just to get a rise out of Sam :P Who tells him he could have led with it, but Dean had a whole little act planned out, including already knowing what bit of the diary to turn to (I suppose he was reading it in the queue for fast food) so this seems pretty much entirely Dean gleefully creating a scenario to force Sam to Sam. (That is, be Sam as Dean knows and loves him with all the expected itching about Dean’s methods as expected. He probably screwed up Sam’s food order too.)

* * *

“Giant bat”

I do think the dragons have an actual dragon form in this episode, just… off-screen.

* * *

*grumbles because even if it’s the most mild comment so far apparent it’s literally impossible to get through an episode of season 6 without a rape mention, for Sam asking if Dean is seriously contemplating that “batman attempted to rape her”*

* * *

I like how Bobby already being in the episode for the plot stuff earlier means we’re allowed to see the Bobby side of a phone call

Also: Bobby snark about Hogwarts. Never gets old. :D

* * *

I like the whole shot here were he’s making his crappy chili out of a can and goes off camera to answer the phone with the camera static over the hob, and off-screen for everyone, Dean asks “What do you know about dragons?” and Bobby comes rushing back to fix his hissing food.

GOSH I love Phil’s directing every time.

* * *

In Dean’s side of the conversation, he’s on a Very Orange Sofa, while Bobby challenges him about the lying.

The orange of doom does seem to be a blaring great warning sign for Dean, and very often connected to his stress about Sam, although with a side order of angsting about Lisa or Cas, though the melancholy blue motel rooms were also linked more to that theme.

* * *

Uhoh, Sam’s remembering the skinwalker thing. Not the best case to remember, Sammy. Trust me, it was weird. You were going around shooting dozens of dogs that then transformed into burly, naked men on death.

Like, that would be memorable enough to trip something in his head, for sure. :P

* * *

Huh, Dean leaves Sam to do the case while travelling to find out about dragons from Dr Visyak, okay, implied that they have NO leads and obviously Sam is in no immediate danger because even if the whole “rehymenated” after Hell thing was true, Soulless Sam kinda wrecked that one completely. :P So is he leaving Sam in a place of safety, or trusting him to cope on his own if anything were to happen?

It’s nice he’s not treating Sam like he’s totally fragile, anyway, just jumps on the lead and trusts Sam to stay without any discussion but not in a bossy way and not implying either route is a cop out or a wussy thing. 

* * *

Mmmmhmm you know between them all Dean has the weakest alibi for not being a colossal nerd: Sam could have literally never have heard of World of Warcraft until he started researching for all that he is at least somewhat nerdy enough I wouldn’t put it past him to know about it (although I doubt he’d have found time to play) I’m just speaking STRICTLY situational here… Harry Potter had long achieved pop culture total saturation for Bobby to make a joke about Hogwarts and for it to at least be something you could expect him to have awareness about just because the entire planet did, but then Dean makes a snarky comment about Dungeons and Dragons, or rather, a comment about twelve-sided die, which is even more specific.

Seeing as Dr Visyak is connected to the other deeply deeply nerdy source material of the HP Lovecraft episode which gets Dean’s “I was having sex with women” line, somehow I’m seeing a lot of undercurrent of nerdery that Dean denies later, but here the evidence is before he can say that 

* * *

“We need a brave knight who’s willing to step up and slay the beast” re: un-stoning the sword

I’m YELLING (not really because shh shhhh migraine) about this. I was talking just last episode about the shades of Dean and passivity that carried over to season 11 with Tessa making him impartially do the deaths, and obey the natural order. Here again we have Dean failing to be the “chosen” one who can slay the monster, as in, he’s not the True King of England or whatever the hell pulling the sword out symbolises

and of course there’s a whhhooooollle lot about impotency here with Dean not able to successfully get out the no.1 phallic weapon of the year… In the end he gets it out but it’s broken in half and semi useless… Again in 6x10 I was talking about the ways impotency was implied about everyone (and Cas in particular DESPITE EVERYTHING ELSE) … I suppose the theme goes with the sheer futility of this season - because it’s going to end on a terrible helpless note for Dean and other members of TFW who are not currently God.

Meanwhile the theme works for Cas in his struggle in the war and not being strong enough…

Generally a theme of not being able to, er, rise and meet the challenge. 

* * *

Also there are some really hilarious faces as he flails at the sword, and it wobbles ridiculously when he falls off of it

Aw Dean  you dork.

* * *

Meanwhile Sam gets really into the hunt, I guess, doing his mood board on the wall. Sam phones Bobby for help and Bobby is the one who has the super clever idea about looking for non-literal caves.

Which of course transitions to Sam asking Bobby about the last year and getting nothing because Bobby at least knows not to stir the bro fight and make it bubble over before its time.

He doesn’t look happy about it.

* * *

Sam tries plan B

Which if you think about it, has strong shades of “hey Cas, we found the Ark of the Covenant” except that he’s doing it as a normal emotive man who just wants some answers dammit. He’s taking advantage of Cas, certainly, but you could see it at least in Sam’s self-justification, that he and Cas ARE friends and friends owe each other straight talk, and anyway they need to catch up regardless and blah blah blah Sam has a soul there are a ton of layers to the things he does once more. Yay!

And once again like the Ark fight, I feel like Cas has his own motives for telling Sam everything anyway because WOWIE was he pissed off with Dean earlier.

* * *

Oh poor awkward chicken going for a hug and not getting it and uncertainly lowering his arms like ????? humans hug??? when stuff like this happens???? (iwaspossiblyinvisiblywatchingyouallhugearliershhwhosaidthat) I’ll just hover my arms here and no wait you’re sitting down??? Please tell me what to do with my hands????

* * *

Aw Cas, feeling like he was really maybe friends with Sam - proper Sam - and then Sam, who has hugged everyone else, is like wow no that’s awkward, and Cas looks SO AFFRONTED. MY POOR CHILD.

Someone hug the angel. 

*Dean takes 1 year to reply*

*Sam takes 3*

Like seriously though why does Sam feel like hugging Cas is more awkward? Is it just because Cas is inherently more awkward and they were never huggy in the first place, whereas he’s exchanged hugs with Dean and Bobby a lot so it’s not weird to carry on doing that on instinct? 

I mean Sam of last-season-in-season-5 vividly remembers force-snapping Bobby’s neck with his own hands and therefore must also remember exploding Cas, so that’s weird. They were definitely friends by the end of the apocalypse though, before Sam got possessed by Lucifer…

… It’s been, what, 5 years since this aired and I still don’t know if this was a joke about Cas being crappy at hugs, or something deep seated in Sam’s psychology, or just the knowledge he was about to lie to him to get info about his missing year while acting like besties but he couldn’t commit all the way to that because he’d feel bad and squishing Cas would make him not want to manipulate him for information?

* * *

I am taking that one last eye narrowing from Cas as “Sam just *lied* to me … oh well, fuck Dean may as well tell Sam everything” since I am now very sold on this headcanon 

* * *

Also this scene being ALL Cas blundering into a trap feels bad for Cas and I don’t like it.

* * *

Meanwhile Dean blows up a historical artefact

* * *

When Dr Visyak says it’s the most valuable artefact Dean has ever touched, is that even remotely true considering the kind of nonsense things they come across in their line of work?

* * *

Lots of orange light suddenly for Dean fucking up the sword in the stone. 

It’s entirely possible they just decided he looks nice in orange light and lit every scene appropriately.

* * *

Dean has done some serious driving, I think?

(I’m going to admit I have no idea where Oregon is but importantly it is a different state from where Dr Visyak is in San Francisco and I know that much :P)

* * *

Dean’s stolen treasure hoard!  :D

Sam’s like “not now” but Dean still pockets a big handful of it.

* * *

Haha he refers to getting the sword from Comic Con I mean come on he is a nerd

* * *

Wow, good thing I already made my gifs during other lulls because that was a very short fight. This is the least amount of time they’ve ever spent on a MotW. Basically all setting up future plot stuff anyway, but you don’t realise how much of this episode will come back - even from this fight, Dean’s treasure hoard makes a reappearance, and, well… the set…. with a special appearance as… the set of the dragon episode………

(oh season 6)

* * *

But yeah as a MotW that was supremely unsatisfying, and the pacing for it is terrible because the actual saving people/fighting monsters bit was 3 minutes of the whole episode rather than at least a sold 30 minutes they normally dedicate even when there’s other talking to do

* * *

This season they do seem more settled with the Impala being parked at Bobby’s and this being their sort of sit around doing nothing place. Season 5, sure they were here a lot, but there’s especially something here about the lack of urgency when as far as Dean and Sam know, there are NO current plot threads to chase, that they just come back to Bobby’s… It’s around this point that it really starts feeling like home? I mean, not like we haven’t seen them staying there before, but they also seem to default to being there and with Bobby with a very different feel than previous seasons?

* * *

Anyway, Sam starts in with the apologies, and Dean responds by finding out who told him and muttering to himself about how Cas is a child.

*groans because this is the season of “baby in a trenchcoat”*

I seriously underestimated that the show could keep the Sam issue between them literally until the end of season 7 from a standing start in season 6 >.> I mean I never claimed there was a GOOD bit of Destiel in the mid-late area of season 6 but I forgot how this fight goes on and on and on

Not sure if he’s grumpy because he thinks Cas was easily manipulated (he doesn’t know about “hey lol we found the Ark of the Covenant” or if this was  _child-ish_  of Cas to go behind his back and tell Sam the moment he found Sam walking and talking but considering their last interaction was a terrible fight over this exact subject, I feel like Dean suspects what I suspect although it was presented as Sam tricking Cas.

(Why are these guys all friends again? They are all literally terrible to each other :P)

Either way, it’s the first time Dean demeans Cas that way, and is starting to show even before they break how things are cracking. I mean in the long run (like, Purgatory long run) this all makes them stronger, but for watching as it airs, or considering intent for the season, this is all totally depressing.

I think 6x19 might be a better place (with more references to it and more on-screen Cas) to talk about Cas and naivety in this season… At least in the way he was presented as the way he was written over this season is increeeedibly harsh

like, 6x20 flips it all on its head JUST first and foremost by being written by someone who loves Cas unreservedly 

* * *

Awww Sam’s morality about him and Soulless!Sam, taking responsibility and feeling terrible about it… we can argue if he is or not, and what parts of Sam’s… idk, spirit or being that Soulless!Sam was operating on, but Sam himself feels like the damage done is enough his problem that he should feel bad about it, and soul or not, he is accepting those actions as coming from a part of him, even if it’s more a subliminal, or automatic part of him than whatever the soul brings to the table with true consciousness and conscientiousness??

* * *

Anyway Bobby interrupts before it can actually get philosophical and their 2 minute break to have no burdens but their psychological trauma is interrupted so Bobby can describe Purgatory and Eve.

* * *

Guess there’s still stuff to do!

* * *

…. This episode has had so much going I haven’t even found time to raise an eyebrow at the dragons stealing virgins thing but I’m going to have to call foul about the dodgy looking van with a ton of girls in the back we know were picked for their purity. It’s a skeevy concept even if they were just using them for ritual magic, and I worry about the others that Sam and Dean didn’t save, because there were at least 3 and I suppose maybe the dragons just brought spares in case the spell didn’t work first time, but the girl who is sacrificed into Eve is the first one they try and it works.

Did the dragons just eat the others???

That is honestly the preferable option, so let’s go with that and not think about this any more because it’s late at night. >.>

* * *

I know Sam… missed… everything… But the way Bobby looks specifically at Dean to tell him it’s Purgatory and Dean reaches for a drink on instinct…

Like, we know by season 10 Purgatory is literally a sub-section of Dean’s consciousness.

I call this accidental ship-tease equivalent foreshadowing in the same way seasons 1-3 have some excellent Destiel episodes in them. :P

Dean’s *real* story with Purgatory starts here…

* * *

Tee hee Bobby calling Purgatory gnarly.

* * *

OH MY GOD DEAN, DEATH LITERALLY TOLD YOU TO BE A DETECTIVE LAST FREAKIN’ EPISODE

“Door to purgatory. Well, I know a demon who would have loved to have known about that.”

DEAN USE YOUR OTHER BRAINCELL HERE WHAT ARE THE FUKKIN CHANCES THIS COMES UP TWICE IN A MONTH???

Pfft

this is what I mean about season 6 NOT utilising detective!Dean, despite him A: being an actual established character in many episodes where Dean actually does pull off great deductions and lateral thinking, before and after this, and B: the fact they literally underlined that he was supposed to be doing this

it just turns these moments from oversights into wilful stupidity even if it perhaps wasn’t meant to be taken that way >.>

… So between Dean being made to look like an idiot by the main plot, and Cas being kicked around… *refers you to my tag for this season*

* * *

I’m pretty glad, despite how the dragons were instrumental in raising Eve, they literally never show up again. Like, they don’t hang out as her bodyguards or something… They were terrible monsters. 

* * *

The light from Purgatory is a fiery Mount Doom orange, and I feel like as a subheading to the other stuff Dean should have been worrying about, since this was dumped on his shoulders, I’m just going to go with orange light haunting him all season with a “should have seen this coming” suggestion too

* * *

Anyway, excellent character intro. You’ll provide a good distraction for the next 7 episodes before they kill you with time to spare for interpersonal drama and angel nonsense

(This is underplaying my absolute love of Eve. Like, I am a wee bit obsessive about her potential, and I’m clinging to her dying and going back to Purgatory and setting up shop there again. 

… And then a novel length story where Dean actually encounters her in Purgatory because it would be badass and I may or may not have entirely plotted this and could easily get 200k words out of it.)

(Better stop here before I actually write them.)


	13. 6x13

I am beginning to feel really sorry for everyone who actually watched season 6 as it aired, because I’m pretty sure I got the best deal ever by discovering there were 3 new seasons since Dean went to Hell and watched straight through to 6x20, without having to wait week by week …

Alternate theory: this run of episodes of “weird dragons?? spider monsters???, mannequins????? was for meta purposes to back up the claim in The French Mistake that season 6 was terrible, and all this suffering is for the lampshade hanging

* * *

I’m getting that season 6 feel of the word “wall” losing all meaning

* * *

Haha thanks to Cas delivering his lines 1 inch from Dean’s face to say some important plot stuff, we get to see that every time in the recaps and now I’m in another episode I’m going from “nah not shippy” to “lol”

* * *

Oh my god is soulless!Sam wearing the brown hoodie in this flashback?

(Literal flashback, this has been flashing lights from start to finish, I am starting to think season 6 is determined to physically finish me off. I can’t wait for season 7′s title card that flashes black.)

Also he appears to have a backpack on the bed next to him in the motel when he and Dean are talking

I still can’t get over the hoodie. Like. Why. That was his season 1 outfit. Do we just use it in flashbacks now to indicate the past? That past was not past-y enough without throwing in the hoodie?

Well at least it looks like the hoodie got damaged and soulless!Sam is hardly sentimental so maybe he threw it out

Good grief, I’m going to be saying “okay Sam’s brown hoodie can not possibly feasibly still exist in canon after this and how did it even fit on Jared’s season 6 shoulders??!” here and then like, 11x16 is going to be like “hey remember Sam’s brown hoodie?”

it’s just the weirdest clothing choice ever for this scene, because it was always used to make Sam look young, vulnerable, and student-y (same as the backpack) which is like everything soulless!Sam was not. 

Why???

* * *

I’m laughing

Where memories are painfully rediscovered

The focus on the octopus in the flashes of random memory recovery for Sam make it seem extremely significant… I’m remembering they were denied tentacle monsters in Caged Heat, and there’s an off-screen octopus kill in a certain season 7 Dabb episode, so generally I feel like the show just really wanted to put tentacles in :P

* * *

Oooh is this the episode where they went to the same restaurant as Cas and Dean had the Burger Date in 10x09?

…

That was a Dabb episode

for the love of God do not let this random woman who walked up to Sam be someone he hooked up with in this exact restaurant

…

Well Dean walked out the loos and checked out a girl and I know there’s at least one bathroom sex flashback for Sam in this episode

…

Yep it’s the bathroom sex flashback although it was not clear if it was  _this_  bathroom

…

fuck it, that’s enough evidence for me

Dean n Cas hooked up in the restroom in 10x09 and then the following conversation started off so awkward because they had no idea what to say after :P

* * *

I like how you can tell it’s soulless!Sam in one blurry photo vs regular Sam

* * *

Aaand despite staying in a perfectly good motel room when they were… somewhere… at the start of the episode, they’re staying in a dilapidated shack again. Not the same one as before, probably because that’s beginning to stretch disbelief even for this show to keep re-using one set and pretending it’s a ton of different places, but this place has holes in the wall and the general use of the terrible dilapidated shack has been for Sam’s metal state, so of course this episode is pretty much only  _about_  that and the looming threat of the broken wall in Sam’s head…

(The brown hoodie and dilapidated shack overlap in 4x09 or 4x10, whichever one of those was the Sam flashbacks… This makes Samuel loosely analogous to Ruby.)

* * *

> Sam, there is a reason that hunters don’t hit the same town over again—'cause we have a habit of leaving messes behind. 

tbh we don’t see that very often (and they DO go back to old towns occasionally, accidentally or not) but that would explain why they keep in contact with other hunters off-screen (It’s implied, anyway, they still have an ongoing contacts list of others for most of the show even if we rarely see them… probably need  _someone_ to send a lead they’ve found onto, when it comes to towns they’ve been expressly told never to return to by its authority figures :P) 

* * *

meanwhile, Sam continues not realising just how bad this thing with his wall is because like I was saying in the previous episode he has no concept of how terrible it could be because he  _hasn’t_ suffered at all?

Like, it’s probably something someone’s complained about while season 6 was airing how he collapses at the end of this episode but then is fine for a nice long chunk of episodes after this until Cas breaks it for him? (I can’t recall another time he actually seems under threat from this)

Nah, this episode just teaches him not to scratch at it >.>

* * *

Pfft, Dean doing the “yea high” thing for Sam and gesturing as high as he can reach above him :P Like the opposite of Dean trying to describe Cas’s height and implying Cas barely comes to his shoulder

* * *

oh man somehow I still managed to forget this was an episode whose plot conceit was  _literally_  Sam’s dick of doom

whyyy

Actually impressed I managed to forget for this long one of the major reasons this episode is eye-roll worthy (aside from the weird monster who manages to combine eye horror and spiders in a uniquely unpleasant way :P) 

* * *

Sam being arrested and taken to prison has a weird parallel to Dean being arrested in the fairy episode? They both end up waiting it out in the cells except that then obviously it went very differently for them… Only mentioning it because both had a turn this season & maybe there’s a theme or something idk it’s past 1am

* * *

wine mom gets grabbed from under the stairs going into the cellar while walking down in stiletto-heeled boots & tipsy

*reels from the terrible combination of things that can kill you* like I’m not even over drunk & alarming heels as a horror story never mind hands grabbing you

* * *

Sam is sitting at the table with a dusty old wrench next to his notes

I feel like that’s important that it’s just a random tool 

… there’s an awful lot lurking in this episode about Sam being used as a tool by Samuel, as it shows more than any other episode how they worked together. See my eye rolling at Samuel telling Sam that baby stew was bad back in 6x02, because he KNEW how terrible Soulless!Sam was and worked with him anyway? I’ve talked a lot about Sam borrowing the blunt instrument theme just for this season and considering hunting was Soulless!Sam’s “moral compass” insofar as completing the job was his guiding imperative he was easy to take advantage of

and then the whole dubcon nature of Soulless!Sam’s hook ups to Sam (he doesn’t remember them and has already compared his impression of discovering he was soulless to being slipped a mickey as he said)

Dean seems impressed that Sam had so many hook ups, but we just get one uncomfortable look from Sam before the police scanner interrupts and he doesn’t express anything

* * *

Sam goes to the possible next victim’s house or whoever she is to the plot of this, and there’s a prominent painting of the Fresh Fruit of Doom on the wall

* * *

UGH Sam’s memories keep getting introduced with horrible white flashes 

maybe I just dislike this episode because it’s mentally exhausting for other reasons :P

* * *

PLEASE STOP REMEMBERING THINGS SAM

Not for your sake but mine

* * *

oooh it snowed

* * *

We are not yet in the world where Sam and Dean wear long coats and I am sad

* * *

Sam wants to put his own life on the line to stop one terrible monster because it’s so important to him he has to remember it

Aw Sam.

I wonder if when he got his memories of it all back he ever sent, like, a ton of apology cards to really random people :P

* * *

Samuel just made a Star Trek reference?? Is he allowed to do that? 

I like to think that on being resurrected he spent some serious catch up time on his favourite shows

(John made a Star Trek reference in 4x03 and I find it hilarious to think that Mary accidentally had a type, except not the whole ‘terrible hunter’ thing that unites them but that her dad and future husband were trekkies… I got no proof on this but Dean is the trekkie of the current generation and Sam uses Wedge Antillies as an alias, so we have to assume that Mary rebelliously was a Star Wars fan if we’re imposing fake binaries on them… :P

* * *

(I mean that’s blatantly wrong because Dean like star wars too but then maybe that’s just a bisexual thing where you like both Trek and Wars?)

* * *

Guess what… the episode is having a long flashback with tons of weird camera stuff and flashes from the memory and from the gunshots so I am not looking at the screen and typing total nonsense while Sam and Samuel do their spider hunting thing.

* * *

Oh hey and here’s the monster with all the eye horror stuff

*twiddles thumbs and checks Neko Atsume*

* * *

The shed actually looks like it’s all full of boat stuff… I suppose because of the local theme for the town although I’m wondering if there’s any thematic relevance… There was a lot more ship stuff in season 10 around this theme when they re-used the set with the restaurant, so it was a lot more obvious, but I think it’s just episode setting specific stuff here… 

* * *

There’s probably some stuff to say about Sam’s failure of the monsters escaping and breeding and him unleashing a ton of them on the world. It’s probably just an example of how he feels about his own problems sort of metaphorically extracted into a physical problem: just an obvious way to measure the damage caused by Soulless!Sam if you take it on a larger scale of how many lives he could have disrupted and not known about it… But also not a good thing to do in a year when the monsters are all riled up and Eve is back, as monsters are having a narky year in the first place. So I suppose it lends itself to the general plot theme anyway of accidentally helping and enabling that bad thing.

Which then you can extract one step further of how their issues and so on enable and help the real long term problem of the season, AKA the Dreaded Miscommunication And Angst of 6x20

* * *

pls we get that the monster has spooky contacts in  _please_  stop showing close ups of his eyes oh my god

* * *

Like, further to that thought about comparing it to the looming main angel plot, aside from propagating a monster race, the spider guy and his wife are utterly sympathetic characters and victims, and the real aggressor was hardly even the original monster compared to Soulless!Sam’s role in causing all this emotional damage. She doesn’t even seem to be taken hostage, even if she acts to free Sam to kill her husband, and she’s emotionally destroyed at the end of it  because of what she was put through with losing her husband twice because of Sam.

… I just like angsty wife parallels here because obviously in 6x20 Dean is the angsty wife

* * *

Anyway then the episode ends on Sam having a horrific flashback to Hell but I have it on good authority that at least the next episode I watch will mean I can stop bitching about watching the mannequin episode in the watches AFTER watching the mannequin episode

what I’m saying is if he can go from this to an episode about possessed mannequins he’ll be fiiine

I’m not sure I will be


	14. 6x14

##  **6x14 Rewatch 3: the reckoning**

You know I’m almost fond of this episode just because it’s so fun to tease the concept?

and I have teased it a lot but in my defence this is probably somewhere in the top 10 episodes never to show someone who has never seen the show before and hasn’t formed their opinion on this quality programming yet >.>

* * *

what were mannequin one and two?

* * *

Previously: everyone else tells Dean how great he and Lisa were

actually SHOW how it fell to bits aside from one cute cooking moment from the opening montage of 6x01

I mean to be fair there wasn’t really much time for cute Dean n Lisa stuff before it all went wrong

* * *

Sam’s best angle is not lying on the floor

I like how they were so nervous about carrying on the MotW after leaving Sam convulsing on the floor that they didn’t even wait until after the cold open murder to show this

it actually comes across as pretty shoddy pacing to two have 2 separate events before the cold open but whatevs 

*lobs popcorn at the screen as the cold open blatantly pays way too much attention to the murderous dummy*

it’s not a very convincing death

* * *

and then Sam is upright, with the sort of headache I deeply relate to because that is me right now, and Dean is trying to give him dodgy painkillers or something that he has found somewhere

this is such an awkward conversation with extremely anvillicious dialogue summarising the entire situation since the start of the season, like making Dean trying to force Sam to admit it was Hell, like it could have been anything else? I’m remembering when Dean got back from Hell and had to deal with demon blood junkie Sam being sometimes rather unsympathetic about this and forcing the issue…. Although FINALLY when Dean was ready to talk, Sam was pretty respectful. In this case Dean’s been pretty respectful until it’s time to talk and then it’s like *shaking Sam by the collar* TELL ME YOU ARE SUFFERING 

Anyway, poor Sam’s characterisation is literally just “the plot” but Dean gets this:

> SAM Dean…I might’ve done…who knows what, and you want me to just forget about it?
> 
> DEAN You shove it down, and you let it come out in spurts of violence and alcoholism.
> 
> SAM That sounds healthy.
> 
> DEAN Well, works for me.

along with the whole handing Sam unmarked pills and then pocketing them when he won’t take them, so that’s a whole lot of on the nose character stuff for Dean

I’m not even sure he’s officially confirmed he thinks of himself as an alcoholic before now, although season 4 was really when his coping mechanism really began to show up on screen and I’m pretty sure that graph that floats around showing Dean’s on-screen drinking takes a sharp uptick between every season until season 8, with 7 as the worst.

* * *

Oooh I forgot that Dean made a joke about seeing Snooki … considering she then comes as a crossroads demon for them in season 9 (… this show, man) I think it was [@mittensmorgul](https://tmblr.co/mH08bFF21ewTCayiwIXZEOg) who had a question posed about crossroads demons appearing as objects of desire? Shall we take it that Dean has a crush on Snooki?

*Sorry for tagging you in a post about Mannequin 3: the Reckoning. I feel as bad as you do :P

* * *

Oh my god

…

I am almost tempted to make a new post for this

Dean’s phone wallpaper is from the fairy episode

He thought the mural was as ridiculous as I did because I took a screencap of him and Sam sitting at that exact table for the express purpose of laughing at the chairs and wall

… no this is too good sorry anyone who clicks on this rewatch and has already seen the best part of it on my blog because[ I am going right now to report my findings](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/140583399443/oh-my-god-im-watching-6x14-right-now-but-this-is)

* * *

Anyway

mannequin episode or something

… Does Sam ever find out why Dean and Lisa split up?

because if they don’t talk before 6x22 then that’s it for opportunities to ever talk about it

I suppose knowing he was partially responsible as soulless!Sam (but also that vampire!Dean was a dumbass) would eat him up

* * *

Sam’s hair this episode seems to be encroaching on his season 7 hair and I’m tentative about this being a permanent state of affairs because I like his season 7 hair best and feel like I’d remember if my favourite Sam hair showed up this soon

* * *

They’re such stupid deaths this episode oh my god

what were even the chances that all these people would be next to mannequins two consecutive days for the ghost to kill them?

isn’t the ghost a disembodied kidney in this one too

I mean really season 6… why??

* * *

> SAM Wait. That anatomy dummy you were molesting at the lab.
> 
> DEAN Excuse me?
> 
> SAM What if that’s what this is about?
> 
> DEAN What exactly are you accusing me of?

pfft

I’m actually impressed tbh that the season has managed such a long consecutive run of comments, jokes, implications and outright mentions of rape - in this case a really silly one but the fact that this has been going all season is reminding me why I really don’t like season 6′s tone… I mean, this is fine on its own but the context goes sooo much further right now

on the other hand it is kind of funny dialogue and I do laugh at this one line :P

* * *

Dean then tries to make fun of the dummy but it gets real too quickly and he has to admit it’s creepy

* * *

13 minutes in and Ben turns this into a Huge Drama

hey remember when in 6x03 Dean told Ben not to lie and how he could tell because he lied professionally?

And then it turns out that when it’s about his love interest he freaks out and can’t tell it’s lying any more?

I wonder if anyone else is lying to him his season and Dean can’t tell :P

(okay that might be a bit of a stretch because this lie is delivered via Ben while Cas does all his lying himself, but anyway Ben lies about Lisa being sick or depressed or in some way in Dire Need Of Help, and Dean eats it up… Meanwhile Crowley literally has a line about the Winchesters buying the lie about the “good” Cas.)

idk

theeeemes

I’m trying to salvage an episode titled “mannequin 3: the reckoning”

* * *

Anyway this has a double purpose of letting Sam cope on his own - he gets to do all the leg work on the case and Dean has to let him, so it’s sort of a forced trust exercise

* * *

I suppose Dean was just stopping for coffee on his Dire Race To Save Lisa but it is pretty funny he splits off because of Ben’s urgent call and then because Sam needs to “get this” the plot to Dean we have a shot of him just walking in a street somewhere holding a cup of coffee

actually considering he called himself an alcoholic this episode we’ve seen him with a cup of coffee at least twice

* * *

*now Dean is at Lisa’s, ringing the doorbell frantically*

too late Dean

too late

you stopped for coffee when she could have been possessed by demons

* * *

Lisa looks so pretty made up for her date

Must have been nice to do this episode for Cindy since she gets to show up and get dolled up for little to no effort for her role, and also is allowed to be barefoot instead of wearing heels and now she is wearing a comfy cardigan

like… that’s the dream job

* * *

uh, anyway.

so Lisa was working on the assumption that since Dean wasn’t returning their calls they were broken up, despite the fact that she actually did break up with him in 6x06, and despite this little contradiction it has the same end result that she’s happily dating. Meanwhile Dean’s amnesia about 6x06 means that there is need to talk and be dramatic about the fact Lisa is dating again

gee this would be awkward if the same people were responsible for writing their break up as writing their other break up that contradicts the first break up :P

* * *

aaand now Lisa is blaming Dean for showing up at their door after Dean confirmed Ben was responsible for that

like “why do you keep coming here”

“idk because I was tricked?”

“we can’t keep doing this dean!!!!1″

“yeah okay I’ll tell Ben not to lie to attempt to piece his tiny family back together”

“WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME DEAN!?”

“… well I already helped myself to a beer from the fridge so I think we’re cool after this misunderstanding”

UGH I hate how Lisa is written here if you can’t tell :P like, this conversation literally exists to hash out some stuff that isn’t even strictly their relationship any more? So it makes her look like the over-emotional hurt party or something? She’s somehow simultaneously moved on and harping on Dean long past the point she should have moved on just for the sake of having her still emotionally invested as if they are still an option rather than the fact she clearly dumped him?

Dean could have showed up on her door as a surprise when she’s about to go on a date and they get sad and reminisce and Lisa explains a bit better the same general idea of her dissatisfaction and fear and not wanting to get emotionally close to him when he has such a dangerous job (so maybe she was glad of an excuse to dump his ass 8 episodes ago) and Dean is like “yeah fair I am not at all jealous you, an independent and strong woman I respect a lot, is dating other dudes now that like 6 months have passed and we’ve been split up and busy all that time but hey we’ll always have memories of those barbecues with Sid and of course as this accidentally proved I will always come protect you and Ben if you need it and like I dunno send him cool Christmas presents or whatever even if this can’t work between us.. do you think I could hustle enough pool to give him a college fund? CHALLENGE ACCEPTED” 

Sorry, that got a bit carried away

* * *

meanwhile Sam is being extremely fed up with the victim who is a dick, like “godammit why do we even help these people?”

“I should just let the ghosts eat these idiots”

I’m glad that even if they commit to saving these people, Sam’s face absolutely does not approve, so it doesn’t feel like Rose is being mocked by the meta story just because Sam is so annoyed about this and Not Approving what this guy did

Also… I have a shirt like the one she wore on her “date”

ooh it’s a dress, never mind. It has the same sleeves though

* * *

“look I’m not saying you deserve to die” Sam says

*Sam does the judgemental eyebrows*

* * *

Dean attempts to have a parental conversation with Ben, who has a plaid shirt and a plaid bedspread so he is well on the way to being a mini Winchester

* * *

Ben pulled “can’t or won’t” on Dean coming back to them, which I swear was used only a few episodes ago… Dean challenging Tessa to call Death for him? 

There’s a fucked up family dynamic parallel :P

(it’s probably not a parallel)

* * *

> DEAN Okay, fine. It’s like this, then. Just ‘cause you love someone doesn’t mean you should stick around and screw up their life. So I can’t be here. 

Oh, he actually says he loves Lisa and Ben

my heart hurts

help

*casually wonders what parallels you could make with this to make it even worse*

*like Cas watching Dean rake leaves*

Oooooh I went there

(this conversation is somewhat better than the one with Lisa, mostly because it doesn’t break previous canon to start in the place they wanted to, which was extremely distracting >.>)

* * *

> BEN You think something will follow you home?
> 
> DEAN No. No, I don’t, but I think my job turns me into somebody that can’t sit at your dinner table. And if I stayed, you’d end up just like me.
> 
> BEN Why do you say it like you’re so…bad?
> 
> DEAN Well, trust me, I’m not someone you want to aim to be.

:( :( :( :(

Wow he has a terrible opinion of himself. I’m not sure at this point we’ve had him express so many negative things about himself all at once any time recently? This actually feels like a critically overlooked piece of Dean psychology in the sense that while we know all this it sort of never gets brought up with the dialogue of this episode in mind, because he gets honest when Ben get annoyed with him and asks for straight talk, and Dean spouts this, which makes Ben angry because I think he literally can’t conceptualise that Dean (who he this is a Cool Dad) might hate himself THAT much. 

Especially with the whole “dinner table” think I’m thinking all the way up to 11x12 - this is reminding me that for a year Dean DID sit at a dinner table and eat home cooked food - he was out of practice but not a total feral person despite his terrible eating in the episode because it’s not the first time he sat at a dinner table. It does sort of set up the idea of having a dinner table as the family norm, and despite the Bunker having a table, and despite Sam and Dean apparently eating at it, it’s not  _coded_  like a family dinner table except for PERHAPS the Last Supper scene 

([which incidentally I have this whole tag about that fucking table](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/tagged/look-at-this-effin-table))

Tables that ARE coded as family are Jody’s, and Lisa’s. Probably others but these are the stand-out examples to me right now. Meanwhile, the Winchesters’ dinner table only becomes a family dinner table when you actually put  _extra_  family at it outside of them, since clearly it’s not “working” if despite having that table AND the ones in the library to eat at, they’re still semi-feral at Jody’s dinner table.

And this all goes back to Dean here saying he’s not ~worthy~ of eating at dinner tables in domestic family situations, so the whole thing carries so much more in it for the ongoing story

* * *

(honestly at some point I am going to crack and do the Look At This Fuckin’ Table masterpost which actually explains the really complicated meta I have about Sam and Dean’s choice of seats at that specific table and what it means, but for now I just have the most bizarre tag ever and now I am added a rewatch from down in season 6, two seasons before there even WAS a Bunker, to that tag for reference while I carry on not writing it :P)

* * *

> BEN You’re a liar, Dean.
> 
> DEAN Excuse me?
> 
> BEN You say family’s so important, but – but what do you call people who – who care for you, who love you even when you’re a dick? You know you’re walking out on your family, right?

There follows the most tragic expression ever from Dean with a moment of realisation at this sinks in. Dean and found family is SUCH a thing, and in some ways I don’t think he really ALLOWED himself to realise that Lisa and Ben had become part of his found family? Because it was a Socially Acceptable Thing To Do, to have a girl and a house and a  kid in the suburbs, that the whole normality of it all was the leading impression? Dean has seen them in a divide from The Life this entire time, which is obvious all season, and he enforces it and gets obsessive about protecting them, andI think there is a WHOLE mess of stuff here where Dean takes them for granted or doesn’t even understand EVEN WHILE CARING A WHOLE LOT FOR THEM. Dean’s found family is often very subversive, culturally - I mean, take Cas as the obvious main example, but for example, them and Bobby still isn’t a “normal” relationship even if there’s a sense you could imply he was “uncle Bobby” as kids and he became a father figure later on, there’s a whole lot which makes it deviate from traditional models of family. Lisa and Ben were SO normal there was nothing subversive about it for Dean - it was HE who was subverted by joining them, for one thing. And I think it’s almost blinding Dean to those fierce bonds he’s formed elsewhere in battle with Cas or Bobby or even the way he and Sam re-affirm their relationship a whole lot through saving each other etc… Like, while Lisa and Ben represent the most traditional family model we see Dean in since like, the  _Pilot_ , Dean himself has lost so much of an idea of that that he fails to understand how “we’re family” applies to them just as much as someone he’s fought beside and bled with?

Basically, that was a “I fucked up” look there because he really only understands belatedly that he’s betrayed his own core principle of family by not actually understanding Lisa and Ben as family in his  _core_  definition? Lisa said herself that she loved her sister but couldn’t imagine selling her soul to bring her back from the dead - they’re displaying a fundamentally different understanding of love that ended up insurmountable except for the fact that all 3 of them loved each other in their own ways and didn’t  _get_  it until it was too late? (Well Ben, as a kid, I think had a less nuanced and much more straightforward understanding of Dean’s role in their life, which is why he “parent traps” them. To him it’s more simpler because he just gets that this set up of someone joining the family in a parental role with the other parent makes them a family-shaped group?)

(I’m thinking now, while my heart bleeds horribly, of 1x03 or 1x04, whichever was Dead in the Water, where Dean is drawing with Lucas and does the stick figure families… Oh god. Abort abort. Too deep in the Dean Winchester rabbit hole)

* * *

So Sam gets to burn some bones

he seems kind of unenthused about his whole job

makes me wonder, though…

> SAM (on his phone while he watches Rose’s corpse burn) All right, it’s over. You’re safe. And, Jonny? Look at this as a new beginning. Lot of chances not to be a jackass. 

How does Sam even FEEL about hunting right now? Like, we talk a lot about how season 7′s end when he went off and found Amelia and had his own year out was the first time HE had a choice since basically JESS DYING not to be involved in the main plot. Of course in Gamble era he theoretically has a choice, but the main plot for Sam is his ongoing mental health problems as a result of the previous 5 years’ plot relating to him. I was saying last episode it was probably the best option to avoid scratching the wall if he wanted to live with it and have the peaceful life, for him to retire then and there (not really an option, I know). And season 7 he gets more ill until it’s nearly deadly… Soulless!Sam demonstrated that Sam is hunting by habit and ingrained behaviour, but it doesn’t ask what he wants or feels. Now he’s back he’s pissed as hell at this job but doing it anyway, resentfully, saving someone who he  _barely_  thinks passes it.

(In a way his words about new beginnings could be to himself, post-soullessness) 

Anyway, not like he really COULD retire now, but I feel like him cracking at the end of season 7 is actually something you can already trace back to here, if not like, Sam’s struggle with whether he wants to do the job or not that was his place of conflict in season 1, before season 2 showed him sharply making up his mind and trying not to look back. After that he was dragged along into the main arc and NEVER had a choice. So even with all this obligation he feels here, I think this is the first time Sam has even the potential of a choice?

* * *

Anyway Dean drives sadly, montaging about Lisa.

As you do

* * *

He has that whole demon!Dean driving in the dark look about him

* * *

I swear that exterior shot of a car was not even of the Impala

* * *

oh my god there’s 10 minutes left how the hell does this even wrap up within 10 minutes some episodes kill the monster with 10 minutes to go and this is still on the false lead and the other kill that needs to happen

* * *

I am… not even going to comment about that death.

Sam’s eyebrows are doing the work for me

he showed ADMIRABLE restraint not to mention the mode of death over the phone

* * *

I forgot that the haunting was all caused not only by the sheer coincidence of the ghost being near a mannequin and one of the dudes who killed her, but ALSO that her sister had to be there at the same time as the mannequin and the dude who had to die

at this point the “oh god it’s her kidney” reveal is small fry after the last reveal although we are left with a long “Sam is so fucking done he’s probably going to just cut her kidney out and be done with it” pause

* * *

also the whole “haunted kidney” thing overshadows the “sex doll haunting” so much they don’t even talk about it?

thank god

* * *

Oh no wait Sam clearly told Dean off-screen because he knows.

Whhhyyy 

Why is there a whole section where Dean gets chased by his car yelling that she’s not a sex doll, and then random flying glass solves the problem by killing the woman as an innocent bystander who gets hit in the kidney so her sister that was possessing it can be free

* * *

I know Sam and Dean sharing a look at the end is meant to be “oh no the girl died” but it’s probably also an unspoken agreement of “you know what how about we never mention this case to anyone ever. Let’s tell Bobby that it was the most boring salt and burn we ever did.”

* * *

lol

> DEAN Well, considering she got carjacked by poltergeist, could be worse. I mean, what exactly did we do back there, Sam?
> 
> SAM Yeah, I’m not putting it in the win column, either.

They totally had that silent conversation

* * *

[template reassuring conversation at the end]

* * *

I am gratified that there was at least some stuff worth looking at in this episode? Let’s never go back here. :P


	15. 6x15

AU where they break the fourth wall so hard they come crashing out of your TV into your house every time you watch

* * *

Huh, the catch up starts with a good summary of the angel war

I suppose that plot has been benched since 6x03

and now they’re dragging it out after Cas just kind of sulking around using it as his excuse to be grumpy and absent (aka the writers’ needing Cas to be grumpy and absent), now we’re FINALLY in the back end of the season it needs a recap

of course since there’s been so little of it on screen a lot of the recap focuses on Cas killing angels in the apocalypse too

This is where I flip gears from being a Dean!girl because season 6′s POV to a Cas!girl because 6x20′s POV and  _really_  start to sob about it all

“angels have got to have something to do, right, now that we’re post apocalypse?” and it montages (aside from a glimpse of Raphael’s BAMF intro I mean daaaaamn they’re still a secret fave :P) just a ton of angel fighting

which is a premise that seems to be pretty reliably attached to Heaven almost every time the writers get back around to thinking about it…. In some ways this plot does a disservice to later seasons JUST because it so effectively shows Heaven as self-fighting and terribly run and fucked up by God’s absence that tbh Hannah almost wrangling it into shape for a half dozen episodes was tragically unrealistic, and the plots to pick from for Heaven have tended towards rehashing this conflict… I think season 8 did the best to work around it while being an active angel season, and season 9 *I* personally liked but other people thought the angel war stuff was dreadful.

* * *

We then recap, after a reminder of who Balthazar is, Meg’s communication spell with the blood, and Why Ruby Was The Best Villain with a side order of having those two next to each other of just “look at how badass and evil demons are”

considering this episode has zero (0) demons in it, and pretending you have never heard of this episode before, the set up seems to be introducing a real angels and demons 100% serious totally dramatic plot episode concept and the toll they have on the Winchesters or something

* * *

This then immediately cuts to the episode with no jaunty recap stuff about, say, the Winchester gospels, which, to be fair, are only very tangentially related to this in a metatextual way, but could have been an advance warning for “prepare for fuckery”

* * *

Actually I was thinking about this episode and how meta episodes can have some strange commentary in them… I mean, just my first thought from this episode, for example:

<http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/127783623708/spn-hellatus-rewatch-5x09-have-you-ever-noticed>

is making me wonder about the parallels when you go to an alternate universe, where there is no god (but magic still works, at least in terms of the blood spell and the fact Sam and Dean can be deposited there and brought back, even if the angel is cut off and the war doesn’t reach them) in this case the show becomes a microcosm of their world, and the parallel of God is that the creator is Kripke, or the showrunners in general, considering Kripke plays the God who is killed (Raphael being the one archangel who subscribed to this theory), and Gamble plays the absent parent in this (what the rest of the archangels believed)… Food for thought as I watch anyway 

* * *

So without any warning the episode opens on the dramatic thunderstorm, followed by a pan down to some random gratuitously gross and bloody research on the laptop, Dean’s being an alcoholic, Bobby is encouraging him by making a booze run in the pouring rain… Love the snapshot of their lives :P

But yeah when Balthazar drops in on it, you are officially not ready. 

“You” being “past Lizzy who had been innocently marathoning this for however many days and is probably still in the window of delirious from being up at 4am a day before or so watching the Apocalypse to the end while procrastinating writing essays about fairies” 

Like, until this episode I could not have told you which one was Jared and which one was Jensen never mind anything else :P I stopped… a few times… to go to IMDB to figure out what the hell was going on. 

Or to discover Misha’s twitter.

My theory after the episode which no one has disproved is basically just that Misha and Edlund colluded to get Misha a ton of new twitter followers

* * *

Balthazar makes an extremely nuanced pop culture reference, mostly to emphasise how unalike he and Cas are? At this point they have  _no idea_ that Cas and Balthy are working together - obviously Raphael is not a great fan of Balthazar after he turned him into salt so it makes instant sense he might be in trouble with raphael, but we haven’t learned anything from Cas since 6x03 about what he’s actually doing and who he’s working with… Balthazar is stunning them with basically everything he says, including, I think, the severity of what’s going on, since we just had a couple of “it’s quiet… too quiet…” episodes, and in 6x12 Cas showed up to help and talk to Dean and Sam without mentioning his own problems, so this was all allowed to slip away into the background. So this isn’t a plot recap but a “plot’s moved on while you weren’t looking” episode

I was talking in Family Matters about how the Campbell side of the story was suffering for happening off screen and giving us no connections to the characters or plot… I think this one skirts almost as close by except that we’re invested because Cas, and the following Cas episodes all actually flesh out the kind of stuff we never really saw with the Campbell plotline but it really could have done with telling us (too late, it’s been benched and next episode after this they clear up all the loose ends to it), as well as most Cas episodes leading up to this one at least mentioning the sort of trouble he was in?

Anyway, this exchange is fast, informative, and still mysterious about what Balthy is actually going to do, all while adding in 3 new plot developments after the plot has been stagnating for, what, 11 episodes, and seals in 2 minutes of screen time this as one of the best nonsense plot episodes on the show. (I think only really Changing Channels can fight it on fair ground as an episode that had equal amounts of “wtf” and “actually going to move the plot forwards”?)

* * *

Fave title card prompt this side of 10x05, where they do the thing to cut the scene and it comes up

And again the broken glass walls between worlds theme is present in a different way - I don’t know how much they knew when they designed it about season 6 literally breaking through realities so often, but the symbolism is blatantly not lost on them here… 

* * *

“Should we be killing anybody?”

Listen, Sam, Dean, you’re not going to understand this because you haven’t met her yet, but trust me when I saw for the sake of your adorable nerdy little gay sister, stabbing meta!Bob Singer wouldn’t do you much harm or at least be very therapeutic more than going and killing some 2-episode bad guys

You are looking into the eyes of the biggest bad villain you will ever encounter because he has caused pretty much everything terrible that ever happened and will happen to you :P

* * *

I think meta!Serge Ladoucheur is possibly one of the underrated best things in this episode.

I had no idea it was him until like, season 10 or something I saw people talking about him and I was like “hang on there’s that guy in The French Mistake who is my favourite crew member was that meant to be him” and just now when I was looking up the transcript I scrolled past a list of the fake cast and crew and I had an “oooh” moment literally 3 minutes ago

* * *

> KEVIN Or we could have them fly at the window, then freeze frame. Then cut to black, act out.
> 
> BOB Freeze frame.
> 
> KEVIN Um…Yeah. Freeze frame.
> 
> SERGE Serviceable.
> 
> BOB Fine. Whatever. Season six. Moving on.

I am conflicted by send up vs truth in satire. It’s probably true that Bob Singer does love the show and doesn’t scorn it as much as this (11 years connected to it after all) but he’s also complicit in being turned into a villain here (tbh, Misha did a similar and possibly snidely better job than this in the Mockumentary since he had access to the real Bob Singer… I can’t remember what he said in there in the mock interview, but I came away with the distinct feeling that Misha had won and Bob didn’t know it :P) and in being made out as someone who doesn’t care and is going for lower production quality, you need to bear in mind anyone who makes it to The French Mistake has just suffered through low budget dragons, bizarre spiders, and the freakin’ mannequin episode, so the truth here is not abstract, it is “the last episode resolved by a woman getting stabbed in the haunted kidney by stray glass so the Winchesters didn’t have to drug her, cut out her kidney, and drop her in a bathtub full of ice, which was legitimately their only solution until the car became haunted”

In any case, this is either a teasing apology, or a raised eyebrow :P

* * *

> TRISH Trish Evian here with Jared Padalecki from tv’s “Supernatural.” So, Jared, season six.
> 
> (Sam is looking over his shoulder into the set of the panic room and turns back in confusion)
> 
> SAM What?
> 
> TRISH You beat the devil, lost your soul, and got it back again. So tell us, what’s next for Sam Winchester?
> 
> SAM Look, I-I-I really don’t –

Just last episode I was asking the same thing. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Sam is the one dragged off for interview (which accidentally doesn’t make it a coincidence that Dean is the one who is then highlighted as being the one who is wearing make up even though that would apply to Jared too. Just a casual reminder that Dean was teasing Sam about wearing make up in Mystery Spot so this is a “eat his own words” moment :P)… Anyway so it was subtext last episode but text here that Sam has serious questions about What Next For Sam Winchester? Everyone wants to know! The show probably doesn’t know! :P 

Having Sam not be able to answer the question though does say a whole lot about the character even if we have this really meta concept around it all. How often do characters in stories get legitimately interviewed… Interviews in fiction tend to either be expressly to show when a character is publicly lying, or in this case and many others, to have them make a heartfelt open response to questions they didn’t ever get asked before when it’s time to spill the truth (in media about public figures, I feel like I’ve seen this trope a LOT)… Anyway in this case Sam is ambushed but he’s got no reason to lie, and I think while his bafflement and adapting to being in the meta!verse are part of his confusion, the question raises a good point, and him not being able to answer it is relevant FAR beyond this episode and Sam’s situational problems.

I mean, Dean literally offers to Sam the idea that he stay here and steal Gen from Jared and live the life of the TV star (although Jared’s stock value would plummet if he was supposed to keep acting to earn his keep but he was now Sam with his acting skillz :P) so now we have Sam back the narrative is giving him a lot of options and asking him some pointed questions about what next (literally) and floating the concept of a normal (ish :P) life in front of him.

* * *

“Written by Ben Edlund”

* * *

> DEAN Hey. Hey! What – (Dean sees 3 more Impalas) I feel sick. I’m gonna be sick. I want to go home. I feel like this whole place is bad-touching me. 

it’s not a season 6 episode until…

* * *

Is there even an episode where the Impala gets splashed with mud around here?

I am guessing they’d be doing that because it was somehow relevant to The Episode We Never Saw. It was set during pouring rain, so I’d guess that at some point when the angel drama spilled over someone or other had to drive in the Impala and got very muddy in the process

Maybe fleeing Virgil or something

although the episode did seem to be focussed around Bobby’s house from the “scene” we see

* * *

Anyway when in doubt, ask for Cas to help

if you can’t get Cas, Misha will do

* * *

It’s actually a pretty funny send up of how they stop and ask Cas for help all the time, and then Misha inadvertently tells them some stuff Cas might have by reading his lines from this exact scene before getting confused

Misha taking a moment to bob his head and get into a sort of Cas angle to talk to them is always hilarious

you can just  _see_  that it isn’t Cas even before they realise, because of the eyebrows and weird squinting

Misha not acting like Cas or acting like someone else acting like Cas will always be amazing

* * *

> DEAN Cas? Cas! Hey, Cas! Oh, thank god. What is all this, huh? W-w-what did Balthazar do to us?
> 
> MISHA To keep you out of virgil’s reach, he’s cast you into an alternate reality, a universe similar to ours in most respects yet dramatically different in others.
> 
> DEAN Like – like bizarro earth, right? Except instead of having Bizarro superman, we get this clown factory.
> 
> MISHA Um…Yeah, well…Anyway, no time to explain. Do you have the key?

the question is

and this is important because I feel like meta!Edlund must have written this fake episode

what is the actual episode about 

or is it literally the French Mistake and yet it doesn’t occur to anyone that the exact same things are happening as are scripted and that Edlund wrote Sam and Dean running around on set and then Sam and Dean start running around on set

is Edlund a prophet in this universe like Chuck was in theirs, writing down the events before they happened 

what the hell happened in meta!verse’s 6x15

* * *

> SAM Yeah.(hands Misha the key) So, uh, what does this thing do, anyway?
> 
> MISHA It opens a room.
> 
> DEAN What’s in the room?
> 
> MISHA Every weapon Balthazar stole from heaven.
> 
> DEAN He gave it to us?
> 
> MISHA To keep it safe until I could reach you. With those weapons, I have a chance to rally my forces.

So it seems like they were supposed to find Cas or Cas find them not long after Balthazar sent them… somewhere… and Cas explains. 

Cas technically is complicit in the plan just because Balthazar lied about the key and so this alone actually lets us know that Cas was cool with giving them the  key and using them as a distraction

I forgot he was responsible for this, or at least, that they confirmed that before the end of the episode and it wasn’t actually a plot twist if you looked at the fake dialogue :P

* * *

Like… if Cas knew that Balthazar was going to do this, then did Cas know they’d go to the meta!verse? Can meta!Edlund see into the SPN verse and accurately write events as if they’re happening with the same accuracy cross-worlds as Chuck within the SPN verse, or was he doing fine but Sam and Dean crossing over into his world disrupted his script?

Is this script telling us that Cas is aware of where Sam and Dean are, even if they break character?

How can they break character if they were going along with the lines perfectly until then?

* * *

misha voice!! one of like 3 times in the entire show before they graciously extended their hand and said “hey wanna be Lucifer for a bit so you can have a few more non-gravelly scenes?”

* * *

I like how in the instant when Misha breaks character we finally get a glimpse of his hand to see him wearing his wedding ring and honestly that is the best thing :P I love that you get to see that <3

* * *

Dean’s reaction to Misha:

> DEAN I just want to dig my finger in my brain and scratch until we’re back in Kansas. 

Oz reference!

He felt as bad about Cas not being Cas as he did about Baby being not his car :’)

(uuh, no offence to Misha. WE like you. I’m sure Dean would like you if you took him out for a drink first)

* * *

I can’t believe Search The Web exists in the meta!verse

it’s probably the linking factor and why Sam and Dean didn’t come to this universe… There are separate clusters of the multiverse and we’re in the Google cluster, while other TV show’s realities are in the cluster around their fake search engine, or in a cluster where Bing or Yahoo is bizarrely the most popular search engine if the show is doing some product placement in our universe :P

* * *

Seeing the clip of baby Jensen on Days of Our Lives reminds me that in season 1 we saw an ID which proves he used to have Jensen’s longer hair, and I don’t think we talk about that like we should

* * *

Honestly if the whole Jensen taking photos of his feet on set of 6x09 becomes Dean’s phone background in 6x14 thing says anything, it’s that these two universes are bleeding more than you’d think. I suppose our universe bleeds to meta!verse which then has some back and forth with spn!verse

* * *

it’s like layers of an onion

* * *

*Jared and Jensen winking at us from footage in the background* REAL BLOOPER OR FAKE META!BLOOPER SHOT FOR THIS EPISODE???

I still worry about what happened to them in this episode. I’d guess with the bleed between universe it’s totally canon that something from I think it was a J2 panel somewhere where they said they almost certainly ended up in the spn!verse is basically canon 

like what even IS canon when it comes to this episode

* * *

> DEAN If we can reverse Balthazar’s spell… I watched every move. (Dean sketches out the sigil)We just, uh, get the ingredients, right, get back to that same window, and…There’s no place like home. 

smart!Dean at his best and Dean dropping another Oz reference all at once and I can’t handle it

* * *

This might be the only time we see Dean letting someone drive him and sitting in the backseat of the car until like Sam arrests demon!Dean in 10x02

that’s how wrong it is :P

* * *

I love the portraits of Gen lurking on the wall behind Sam before he ever sees them. 

what a use of dramatic irony storytelling and real life everything 

like

I mean if you were bullshitting an episode about a totally and utterly fake Jared and Jensen and decided to make up that Jared married Ruby’s actress when that  _wasn’t_  a thing, you’d only be doing a fraction of the work of the irony for Sam here but it would still be a really fascinating thing to do

I’m so glad they were cool with including this :P I don’t think many characters in anything can top Gen’s one off post character death return to the show

* * *

… mostly because the alpaca is in a framed photo next to their wedding photo

meta!Padaleckis are weird people

* * *

The best thing about this episode is that while I as a first time viewer was diving onto IMDB to look shit up

Sam had to dive onto IMDB to look up his wife’s name

this is truly, truly, an interactive episode

* * *

The card that Sam holds up actually says “Jared Padalecki” on it

 _is that his real credit card_?

I am assuming it’s a prop and Jared did not wave around an actual card and reveal its number to millions of viewers

* * *

Ooooh no I always assumed that was a joke about Jensen having less cash for some reason but the card Dean was using was also Jared’s. I guess he has spent a  _fair_  amount of money based on the house

* * *

Sam goes running after Gen and acting like a dork

Does it count as cheating when it’s your husband’s alternate universe counterpart? Like what are the rules on this? I’m sure Misha would know

our Misha.

* * *

> GENEVIEVE You have been Sam Winchester way too long 

She says 5 season ago

* * *

I still can’t believe Sam slept with Gen

* * *

Like on the list of characters Sam Winchester has slept with, “Jared’s wife” is on the list

* * *

I like how Sam doesn’t even care about Misha thinking they’re crazy and then Dean comes over and talks to Sam like Misha isn’t even there to find it weird they’d be worried about acting

* * *

> MISHA Balthazar is no hero. But he knows Raphael will never take him back. 

Exposition! \o/ Now we know Balthy and Cas are working together, this is as good an explanation as any for why Cas trusts him in this fight even after their uneasy conversation in 6x03, even if it’s from meta!Edlund’s script of an episode that doesn’t exist

* * *

I love Misha’s catwalk towards the camera while acting Cas like that’s just *pretends to be a model while walking away from them and talking into the camera* 

EVEN CAS ISN’T THAT BAD YOU DORK

And then Dean tries to replicate how he’d look at Cas 

Dean what do you even think your face is doing when you look at Cas

* * *

okay so the scene is sort of like this, assuming the lines Misha was running with them were for the next day’s episode and here they are:

> DEAN Cas? Cas! Hey, Cas! Oh, thank god. What is all this, huh? W-w-what did Balthazar do to us?
> 
> “CAS” To keep you out of virgil’s reach, he’s cast you into an alternate reality, a universe similar to ours in most respects yet dramatically different in others.
> 
> DEAN Like – like bizarro earth, right? Except instead of having Bizarro superman, we get this clown factory. [I suspect that is NOT Dean’s line based on Misha’s reaction :P]
> 
> "CAS” Um…Yeah, well…Anyway, no time to explain. Do you have the key?
> 
> SAM Yeah. (hands “Cas” the key) So, uh, what does this thing do, anyway?
> 
> “CAS” It opens a room.
> 
> DEAN What’s in the room?
> 
> "CAS” Every weapon Balthazar stole from heaven.
> 
> DEAN He gave it to us?
> 
> "CAS” To keep it safe until I could reach you. With those weapons, I have a chance to rally my forces.
> 
> […]
> 
> "CAS” Balthazar is no hero. But he knows Raphael will never take him back.
> 
> DEAN [grimly. lol Dean reads the stage directions] And yet, somehow you got no problem with it.
> 
> […]
> 
> SAM That’s because…That’s because we have no other choice.
> 
> […]
> 
> SAM If there’s a key…then there has to be a lock. And when we find the lock, we can get the weapons, and then we can have the weapons. And the lock. We’ll still have the lock, I imagine, because we’ve opened it, and, of course, the initial key.
> 
> DEAN We need to get all three of that crap.

It’s also set in Bobby’s house so if there was an AU where they were sent to an AU that was not the set then it was still Bobby’s or somewhere like it… It seems Sam and Dean get hold of Cas after their encounter with Balthazar, and demand the explanation. When he confirms that he’s working with Balthazar, clearly some of the missing dialogue is Dean being like ??? he’s a dick??? and Cas probably in rather more heated season 6 mood than whatever meta!Misha is acting (because we’re 4 seasons from them comfortably making jokes about the actors standing too close :P), gets narky with them, and accuses them of working with demons like Meg or Crowley in the past or SOMETHING snarky and season 6 Cas-ish, because Sam is supposed to get defensive about THEIR poor choices in friends and allies, if Sam could actually act for toffee with the “we have no other choice” line. If this is all chronological, then they managed to reach an impasse on that one and the conversation was supposed to drag back around to the weapons, probably Sam supposed to get excited about having an advantage to help so why don’t they use the weapons?

Except whatever that is happened instead as Bob gave up trying to make them speak the lines :P

* * *

*Misha mouthing “what the hell” at the camera*

* * *

Still wondering where “penultimate” comes into it

I hope Sam was reading ahead to try and glean more plot spoilers about this episode

if he’s mocking the script and this was meta!Edlund’s episode, then what a self-drag :P

* * *

> KEVIN Misha’s celebrity tweet says it’s a black-market organ thing. I’m betting drugs. 

There is a missing tweet about all this?? MISHA (our one) YOU DROPPED THE BALL

* * *

> SAM What if it can’t? Look, I was up all night, looking online. 

Mmmhmmmmmmm sure you were

* * *

Which, even if he did take a break to be led upstairs by Gen, he could have done and if he did then it mirrors 2x20 where Dean, waking up in the wish!verse (or so he thinks it is) starts looking up all their past cases and discovers they DID happen

which was his primary motivating factor to get back to reality (wake up). But in this case the universe is “safe” which makes is a viable alternative to stay in

* * *

I’m trying to remember if the motel room set Virgil busts out of is one that they stayed in. Fairly sure there wasn’t a motel in the last episode and I forgot I needed to be looking for this in the previous ones :P They end up on the set of the dragon episode so I guess it could go pretty far back, especially if meta!Wanek hadn’t needed to make any motels for a little while because we haven’t been seeing them on screen… 

(actually, yeah. Nothing in 6x11, log cabin motel in 6x12, shady shack in 6x13, nothing in 6x14…)

* * *

In the background, Sam and Dean’s stunt doubles (according to Superwiki) are rehearsing a fight, which means whatever this episode was meant to be about, things could have got heated

I guess this inadvertently saved us from a ton of bro drama and a punch up fight between Sam and Dean?

* * *

Sera’s “huh!” when told Jared and Jensen beat an extra to death

(Superwiki also informed me the other guy in this conversation is meant to be Jim Michaels and is actor re-use from the prison episode with the warden which I think is quite amusing for a producer… Also sadly this is not Sera’s voice even though it’s just over the phone)

* * *

> BOB Yeah, I think what we might need at this stage is for Kripke to come up himself. He created the show. They’ll listen to him.
> 
> SERA How’s that make me look? I’m supposed to be running this thing.

*continues to feel very sympathetic for Sera considering the quote about how there’s always been one showrunner (Bob) and he’s just had different assistants.* (edit: halfway down this pag, ish: [http://variety.com/2014/tv/spotlight/supernatural-oral-history-200-episodes-ackles-padalecki-kripke-1201352537/](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fvariety.com%2F2014%2Ftv%2Fspotlight%2Fsupernatural-oral-history-200-episodes-ackles-padalecki-kripke-1201352537%2F&t=ZjdiYTA5ZDZmMmFlMWIzOTk4Y2QxYTgwNmU0ODFmMTk4NzQzOTIxMyxpbGpNb2s3Rg%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F140646133178%2F6x15-rewatch-au-where-they-break-the-fourth-wall&m=1) thanks [@justanotheridijiton](https://tmblr.co/msbbZom6stVUaSwCo2j0eeQ)) I mean Kripke as the creator gets more credit but I suppose once he’d had the original spark and they settled in to make it, his job vs Sera’s wouldn’t be that different?

I’ve just remembered this meta by [@convictioncas](https://tmblr.co/mUVtTgfV86YRKK2Q9IcqsXQ) (i think, I didn’t re-read it just knew where to find it quickly, sorry if it turns out not to be this one :P) parallels the showrunners and their Gods, with Sera as Godstiel

 <http://convictioncas.tumblr.com/post/106824300437/metatron-as-carver> 

I am trying to make a really sketchy parallel with this scene where, where if we take Kripke as God that makes a great parallel in this episode for the end of the season. Cas (Gamble) struggling for power but the archangels (producers and directors with Bob as Raphael?? :P) think they should defer to the original Creator despite the fact he’s left the building and is apparently holed up in a shack somewhere writing crappy scripts (… which even goes to the Chuck speculation about HIM being God :P) and Sera is overlooked and her power is sketchy and insubstantial. The “apocalypse” is that Gamble gets ignored and it’s an alternate example of what happens: everyone dies because this season’s New God didn’t rise up and defend them herself (even though realistically she probably would have just got shot too she doesn’t show up for it to happen so it leaves the potential of the scenario open :P) 

anyway this also has Gamble vs Kripke just in who gets listened to and her struggle to assert herself as the new voice of the show (she… literally is represented only as a voice). Cas also reaches out to God at the end of the season but doesn’t get an answer and is trying to assert himself as the new God. Idk maybe Crowley is Bob Singer here, enabling the ascent but also clutching at power for himself… Either way he’s the villainous figure :P

I think it was pretty brave to show Sera at this disadvantage anyway… I think (I didn’t re-read it sorry) my reply to that meta was that she had the most in common with her god (Cas) and yet disliked him the most and tried to kill him off, maybe in a way art imitating life instead of life imitating art making her uncomfortable and making her dislike Cas. She of course has the same exact problem Cas does in the voice over from 6x20, of being left with the pages torn up after the Apocalypse and the ending averted. How do you even carry on as a storyteller from that? She had to find a way, just as Cas did, and that was Cas’s pride fall and so on, while Sera has the shortest tenure as a showrunner and 2 of the most popularly disliked seasons with low ratings (commentary about this influence from Bob overriding her aside >.>)

And this episode is  _before_ all that happened. I sort of feel the discomfort she faced radiating out across the whole season? I don’t know, it makes me sympathetic to her, but not Cas’s fate in her seasons :P Like, aside from being sympathetic to Cas, 6x20′s narration also gives us a powerful reason to be lenient on season 6′s issues with the story, and that meta commentary honestly salvages the season as much as the episode’s incredible everything else salvaging the internal story, Cas’s characterisation, and all sorts of other stuff.

(listen I need to try and expel some of my squeeing about that episode before I watch it or the notes for it will be intolerable :P)

* * *

Ah yes here was the point where I paused the episode and made that fateful google search “Misha Collins twitter” 

considering I was only a few weeks later than this episode, I found what I was looking for pretty easily and then got very distracted reading about him building orphanages, which made what happened next all the more tragic :P

* * *

Do you ever look back at your past self, and see them hunched up under a duvet sitting on a rickety chair under a skylight drinking horrible cheap coffee and obsessively hitting a “next episode” button and just think “you have no idea what you were getting into, do you?” 

* * *

What’s really funny is Bob Singer sitting in Bobby’s seat at his desk at this point is a horrible uncanny valley perversion of the character, trying to ask if Jared and Jensen think of him as “uncle Bob” and once again paints Bob Singer in this really weird light as a villain in this episode. Like, if there was an antagonist on the mundane side of things, Bob’s been forcing them to act and wrangling them and generally blocking Sam and Dean from getting home, all while bumbling around bitching about season 6 even existing

like, the later lack of sympathy and comments from the real thing especially over the Charlie issue really made him into the fandom’s boogeyman but I am fascinated at this portrayal… He signed off on it, but…

* * *

Dean finally says the most self-positive thing we probably ever hear him say because this world has wigged him out  _so much_

> DEAN You heard my brother. That’s right, I said "brother.” ‘cause you know what, Bob? We’re not actors. We’re hunters. We’re the Winchesters. Always have been, and always will be. And where we’re from, people don’t know who we are. But you know what? We mattered in that world. In fact, we even saved a son of a bitch once or twice. And yeah, okay, here, maybe there’s some – some fans who give a crap about this nonsense.
> 
> BOB I wouldn’t call it nonsense.

Bob FINALLY speaks out in defence of the show but you know what TOO LITTLE TOO LATE, BOB

(this is one of those lines from Dean where I die a bit of second hand embarrassment but he’s busy burning Jensen’s life down without a care in the world so it’s sort of second-second hand :P)

* * *

Poor meta!Misha

* * *

Can’t believe there’s jaunty music over his crime scene

* * *

I think Dean is genuinely worried that Sam would pick the weird AU over home

I’m not sure this counts as Sam really picking working together over any other course because this place is  _weird_  and terrible and at least when you’re in your own universe it’s familiar problems, you know? Like, sure, an archangel is trying to re-start the apocalypse because they’re pissed the story didn’t end properly, but at least that’s something Sam and Dean have experience with, while all the on-set discussion of hockey is freaking them out :P

* * *

Anyway Kripke and Bob Singer are killed off although  _someone’s_  vengeful spirit continues to haunt the show and direct episodes 

but obvious Death of the Author is obvious

* * *

(I think Serge ninja-ing out of the way of the bullets is the best thing ever… Why is that even a thing? What in-joke between the crew do we not know?)

* * *

Aaaand back to reality 

* * *

Not impressed with the jokes about Raphael’s vessel: the best thing to have done would have been just to not mention it >.>

* * *

Our Cas!!!

Doing the wing thing!

And Dean seeing it and gulping ha ha okay he’s probably actually terrified of what’s going on with Cas but that expression is a shade away from confused attraction to a guy with a huge set of wings and command of thunder and lightning when needed for a dramatic moment :P

* * *

Cas is not doing the thing meta!Misha acting Cas was with the squinting and headbobbing

which was probably nearly as distracting as Dean acting as Jensen acting as Dean doing the pouting :P

Nice to know Misha thinks Cas is a bird though

Cas’s intensity is SO much more than meta!Misha’s acting?? I am so upset :P

* * *

> SAM Cas, what the hell? Wait, wait, you were in on this, using us a diversion?
> 
> CASTIEL It was Balthazar’s plan. I would have done the same thing.
> 
> DEAN That’s not comforting, Cas.
> 
> CASTIEL When will I be able to make you understand? If I lose against Raphael, we all lose. Everything.
> 
> DEAN Yeah, Cas. We know the stakes. That’s about all you’ve told us!
> 
> CASTIEL I’m sorry about all this. I’ll explain when I can.

….

Then he literally never explains until he’s in a ring of holy fire and everyone’s too upset to listen and he’s babbling all the wrong things

Aw Cas

If you were waiting for the opportune moment… that was it :P

(side note: I know there are other episodes that reference the angel war or use Cas and/or Raphael but is Edlund  _solely_  responsible this season for actually telling anything about it? I mean the cowboy episode shows a tiny bit from Cas’s side, and the Titanic episode hints the loudest what Cas is up to before it’s too late, but…

I think Edlund in like 3 episodes was left to actually shape everything :P)

* * *

> SAM (knocks on the wall) Solid. (Sam breathes out in relief) It’s real. Nice.
> 
> DEAN Yeah. Yeah, real, moldy, termite-eaten home sweet home.

Calling Bobby’s place home sweet home :’)

* * *

It’s been years and I still can’t believe they actually made this episode


	16. 6x16

Welcome to next time 

* * *

I really like the opening of this episode because Eve but I also dislike this episode because of everything

Dammit what did Rufus do to deserve this episode

* * *

Eve as a jump scare is good. Barefoot and in a white pinafore dress still she’s radiating innocence (well, she required a virgin to become her vessel as the only precondition) - even though she kisses the trucker dude I feel like the overall vibe of her is not predatory sexuality or meant to be, especially when she’s coded so strongly with tropes about innocence. It’s probably pretty easy to disagree with that (so I really don’t mid if you do) considering she kisses the guy but it didn’t have a whole lot of tropey seduction vibes to it, just a kiss out of the blue and no being weird about it like for example the way Amara behaves with Dean. She makes a pretty good parallel to Eve actually, which maybe the hindsight from season 11 is making this much more innocent as well. 

I’d guess she’s supposed to look roughly the same age as Amara in 11x06, another episode which highlighted the character’s barefoot innocence, except Amara stole shoes and made a move on Dean and generally the entire thing was wrapped up in sketchy tropes about predatory teens and Amara growing up? This episode’s Eve in the opening scenes has none of that… It reminded me the first time I watched it of scenes such as Meg back in 1x16 where she gets in the truck and the entire time you know the driver is in FAR more danger than she is, while with Dean you knew neither of them were going to kill the other so the potential drama ALL came from the style and result of their interactions?

and then the driver pushes Eve away and reveals he’s an evangelical Christian and is apparently genuinely offering a lift out of the goodness of his heart and refuses to let her make a move on him, instead getting into a philosophical discussion

and then we have Eve demonstrating really well that same sort of vibe they want about Amara except that Amara is almost too naive? Even as Emily Swallow all grown up in 11x09 she was missing some fundamental knowledge about Christianity and stuff, or the approach humanity took towards God…  Eve has been off in Purgatory but either she caught herself up easily or she’s been following events from afar: monsters can bring her info when they die or they remain her eyes and ears even when she’s in Purgatory. Either way she shows up confident, informed, and without any innocence when it comes to motive and philosophy that undermines Amara’s approach

> RICK (Rick hands her a ‘Jesus Loves You’ pamphlet) This emptiness you feel inside –it’s really a hunger for him.
> 
> EVE You do know that Jesus was just a man.
> 
> RICK Sure, but he was also the son of God, sent here because he loves us.
> 
> EVE God doesn’t care about you.
> 
> RICK Sure he does.
> 
> EVE Your father made you and then abandoned you, so you pray. You see signs where there’s nothing. But truth is, your apocalypse came and went, and you didn’t even notice. A mother would never abandon her children like he did. You’ll see.

Like with Amara she has a beef with God and his absence, but it isn’t personal, and she is taking much of an approach as an equal to God but with a flock to care about: her “children” are the monsters she’s there to tend so there’s no ambiguity about her hurting humans, who are just the prey to the children she cares about. This dialogue quickly establishes her as ageless, aloof from Creation so far as it relates to God or Heaven or angels (making her out-matching Cas in 6x19 unsurprising before it happens as her disdain for it all does not come across as underestimating this force but understanding it and just plain not caring) and as a direct narrative parallel to God, rising to the challenge of her children being threatened as a parallel to the Apocalypse, but she swoops in to stop it unlike God’s known involvement. 

There’s probably some tropes about idealised motherhood at work here with her as well since she becomes Mary, and God was directly paralleled to John over the apocalypse, especially though Cas’s relationship to him but basically in Dean’s understanding of him as a whole. 

I was saying at the start of this season how 6x02 basically gives us a do-over on Mary’s story with her as an innocent victim to the tragedy of their family, and this feeling is enforced a few times through direct mentions or other parallels. Now we have the mother figure show up and she’s got complex,  _caring_  motivations and directly subverts the actions of the father figures… 

I think the uncritical use of Mary in this season probably as a whole isn’t that good as previous canon undermines this image of her, just because she’s  _more_  interesting when she’s being explored as something other than the fridged mom in a white dress who died in 1x01. (For example, the “Mary” image that came to visit Sam while he was hallucinating in 4x21 is a fascinating use of her, and the flashbacks with young Mary both work to make her more than the uncritically examined victim/daughter/mother she’s presented as this season)

I suppose the most you could say for Eve is that she obviously kills a lot of humans and causes collateral damage while protecting her monster babies - the apocalypse is enabled by Mary’s actions of selling Sam to Azazel long before he was born and so her collateral damage is the largest of anyone’s, while she was only trying to keep her loved ones alive. Eve blatantly not caring for humanity for the sake of her family is a very dark mirror on the sacrifices and collateral damage the main characters make…

But yeah, in this particular conversation which acts as the main explanation for her motives, it’s all “mothers come help their kids when fathers don’t” and from her  _own_  moral compass, she immediately gains a great deal of complexity by being absolutely 100% motivated by love and concern for her family, even if the family itself has always been painted with broad strokes on the show as the evil in the world, so she is blatantly evil to human eyes :P

* * *

anyway then the rest of the episode

*hits post and skips the rest* 

lol no but okay this guy goes and murders his wife because of course 

* * *

We do get to see Bobby coming on the case with them and we’ve barely seen him leave the house so far 

probably because going near a case where nearby there had been dozens of monsters all at once you need like 3 hunters minimum in case you walk into another “werewolf dance party” (Bobby did not offer further context)

Also everyone is in their long coats, all 3 of them in different shades. Dean has the black coat! \o/ Sam in dark grey-brown and Bobby in lighter grey

like, 0 to 100 on the coat front

* * *

Dean manages to make flirty noises of interest at the CCTV footage of Eve and then call her a bitch in under a minute

* * *

Aaand here’s Rufus in the tan coat near identical to Cas’s season 9 onwards coat and at the very least a parallel

because, you know, friends they’re going to lose before the end of the season

* * *

> RUFUS So are we partnering on this or not? Come on, man. It’s not rocket surgery. We’re here. Let’s do this. Just like old times.
> 
> BOBBY Long as I get to drive.
> 
> RUFUS (laughing)Hell no.

Focus on the good! Rufus saying “rocket surgery”. Just their friendship <3

(BAH)

(HEY NEW FOOTAGE OF THEM TOGETHER UP NEXT ON SUPERNATURAL IN CURRENT CANON

#season 11 spoilers)

* * *

I do like how we get to watch Bobby and Rufus working this case and Sam and Dean are temporarily forgotten, even if it is gross because ew poking dead bodies full of monster goo

* * *

Like… in the grand scheme of things do they feel totally helpless to the Eve situation or responsible? Obviously her MAIN reason to come here is aggravated by Crowley’s work and the threat Cas poses to Purgatory, but thanks to detective!Dean still dropping the ball on this, they have no idea about that connection. On the other hand, they’ve known ALL SEASON that monsters are riled up and acting weird, and they know Crowley has been doing weird stuff to monsters, and they know they HELPED him do weird stuff to monsters, for quite some time. And then Sam and Dean fucked up and let one dragon get away and that he had a page of the spell book probably about Eve and whether it’s bad plotting or they all just knew it in their bones, they seem 0% surprised to see and identify the “mother of all” walking the earth a few weeks later…

(have they had any signs until the start of the episode about it? I know the audience has known since 6x12 but they’re taking this very easily)

* * *

Hah Rufus let Bobby drive on the way to the terrible creepy place the rest of this episode is set in 

* * *

I think they go down a lift so yay descent into hell imagery

like there isn’t enough of that literally on the show

* * *

“WELCOME TO NEXT TIME”

I like all the reaction shots to Gwen, Sam like *panic eyebrows* because the last time they interacted he was soulless and I’m not even sure he  _remembers_  her except by reputation so it could be “omg it’s Gwen who I worked with for a year while soulless” and then Dean is just surprised, and then Bobby and Rufus in the back like Bobby knows exactly who is next through the door and Rufus knows NONE of their drama so he is all ????

* * *

Dean figures it out when Samuel walks into shot :P

* * *

Thank goodness Rufus is here because this scene un-awkwards immediately with the “he’s our grandfather” explanation after an attempted murder, and 

> RUFUS Oh. Somebody needs a hug. 

* * *

Please tell me we know what goes on in the other room while Sam and Dean angst at each other about the morals of killing your grandfather, because leaving Gwen, Samuel, Bobby and Rufus alone together without the main characters who bind them together sounds like an amazing conversation

they probably talked about the weather or the drive down here :P

* * *

> SAM Look, maybe he knows something.
> 
> DEAN You don’t remember what he did. I do.
> 
> SAM I know. I’m not saying don’t. I’m saying not yet.

that’s almost soulless!Sam logic about the situation - Samuel is here to hunt the same thing they are so it makes sense to set aside vengeance

also Sam isn’t taking a moral stance about not murdering blood relatives on principle

tbh this writer only ever wrote soulless!Sam until now

* * *

> (Sam re-enters the room, Dean waits just outside)
> 
> BOBBY So…you’re Samuel.

yeah okay Rufus and Gwen clearly made small talk while those two were sizing each other up

* * *

I actually can’t remember who kills Samuel or Rufus or Gwen, which I guess is because I never care to remember this episode but also adds an element of surprise

I guess Dean gets possessed now though

* * *

There’s a ton of windows with red light behind everyone

* * *

> RUFUS I, uh, really hate to break up this little circle of love, but why don’t we talk shop, huh? How about you tell us what it is you’re hunting?
> 
> SAMUEL A creature from Purgatory. She calls herself Eve.
> 
> SAM Eve?
> 
> SAMUEL Yep. They call her mother. She was here about 10,000 years ago. Every freak that walks the face of the earth can be traced back to her. And she’s back.
> 
> BOBBY How the hell do you know all that?
> 
> SAMUEL You don’t know half the things that I know, kid. Hell, until recently, you didn’t even know about us.

How DOES Samuel know all that? It’s going to bother me because obviously once they kill him off we never hear about him again

I suppose since Crowley isn’t actually dead he could just still be working with him and then Crowley forgets to tell us they still did until Samuel died

Also he calls Bobby “kid” which is weird because Samuel does not look old enough to be calling Bobby “kid” and even if he’s a grandfather to adult Winchesters he was a middle aged dad and then he was dead for like 40 years or something but just because he is like 90 or whatever based on his birth date doesn’t mean he’d feel like an old man?? Is Jim Beaver even younger than Mitch Pileggi? brb

lol he’s 2 years OLDER than Mitch Pileggi apparently

* * *

Awwww no Gwen is wearing a purple top. Doooom :P

Gwen seems pretty quick to believe Samuel would feed Sam and Dean to hungry ghouls, gives him the stink eye and marches off to ask Dean about it, leaving us with the hardly less stable off-screen combination of Samuels, Bobby and Rufus  _really_  regretting getting involved in this family drama

I’m supposing she has her own serious reservations about Samuel, although she hasn’t spent much time on screen and I don’t think we saw her since Family Matters? Samuel continued doing sketchy stuff behind her back in Caged Heat, and she was left behind before

did Dean even text her to say “hey btw all your family are possessed by demons and your great uncle or whatever he is to you is working with Crowley” or did he just assume Gwen was not possessed… Or forget about her but then when she wasn’t among the demons in Caged Heat, assume maybe she was okay after all so there was no “what if she’s a demon!?!?” here

tbh why am I even asking questions about the Campbell family dynamics

* * *

especially because lol she’s dead

* * *

Rufus gets points for trying to save her and getting really into it like on a scale of 1 to horrifically jaded somehow he is the least maudlin about trying to save the innocent gunshot victim and I bet Rufus does not often feel like the most well-adjusted person in the room but he’s got Bobby helping him and Samuel watching dispassionately

* * *

Rufus like “why do I get left to babysit the psychopathic grandfather?”

* * *

I suppose if you really like red and orange lighting in abandoned industrial places this is the episode for you

* * *

This episode has so much pointing guns and shouting and tbh in this high stress environment I’m not even sure what’s in character for who to be stomping off or lurking dramatically in the shadows or whatever

* * *

> ( Rufus sticks his finger in Dean’s ear) 
> 
> DEAN Hey! What? Why don’t you buy me a drink first?
> 
> RUFUS Second date.

Out of context Dean x Rufus ear fetish PWP

* * *

I may be slightly disengaged from this episode despite Rufus 

* * *

Although the whole “Khan Worm” thing has reminded me of 10x15 which is bad because that is a quick path to hysterical giggling that they ever allowed an episode based around the premise of “Dean and some bloke get really sweaty and thirsty in an emergency steam sauna”

* * *

Everyone is anGRY

Bobby and Rufus seem to be working the most generic model of hunting, with a ton of contacts to reach out to and a wide social net, even if they’ve alienated some of the other hunters (and each other, since they bring up Omaha) whereas Samuel has a place of privilege on knowledge, with his elite contacts if Crowley brought him up to speed on Eve, and his library full of secret family knowledge which tbh why did they not raid that and move it to the Bunker later?? but anyway he has nothing to do because he doesn’t rely on the same framework for information as the “lower class” hunters who aren’t a fancy bloodline (in a way Gwen getting killed before him is showing him the end of said fancy bloodline (disowned Winchesters aside) before his time and also, of course, way after it factoring in the whole dead for 40 years thing.)

Meanwhile Sam and Dean sit around too without anything to do but pout and glare, as Bobby or Cas is their port of call for help, going for trusted friends, and probably 90% of the rest of their research is done on the internet and they don’t have laptops here so they’re suffering from being the younger generation I guess? :P I dunno

Anyway it’s making it so the old but trusty method of phoning a ton of people for info is the only active path, but it still proves to be useless

not really sure what the message is here

* * *

> RUFUS Hey, don’t feel bad. You know, it was a good plan, except for the part where a monster would definitely, definitely not give up all his weapons.
> 
> BOBBY Shut up.

*goes back to appreciating Rufus for lack of anything better to do here*

* * *

> SAMUEL What you gonna do, son? You’re not gonna shoot me. You got your soul back. You gonna shoot your own family? 

TBH this is just paralleling Dean back to soulless Sam as he absolutely would shoot Samuel

also these arguments are all extremely blurry… it’s making out all these lines like omg would you cross them but then with Samuel everyone has a motive for murder anyway so like, does the presence of the worm really actually change anything?

is it even in character that they would honestly try to murder him?

I don’t even know

* * *

Anyway Sam shot Samuel so obviously he does not care enough not to stress about the family thing

* * *

it’s kind of depressing that’s all there is to say on the subject :P

Sam and Dean then briefly get philosophical about what Mary would think about them shooting their grandfather/her dad but decide she’d probably be cool with it

* * *

tbh I really don’t know how much you’re meant to take this episode as actual characterisation :P

* * *

Oh god I forgot about the electricity but now I’m just cackling again about Dean having to mess around with giving Cole some electric shocks as the foreplay to their Extreme Thirst competition

You know it’s a sad day when you realise that, implausibly, 6x16 has actually been ruined for you

* * *

~started from the bottom and now we’re somehow even lower~

* * *

> RUFUS This can’t be my afterlife 'cause the three of you are here. What happened? 

Oh no! I just remembered 7x10 which I have been actively trying to forget for this entire rewatch 

welp I guess he sees Bobby there >.> 

I mean it’s a manifestation of Bobby’s consciousness as far as I can remember and not actual Rufus

although belatedly like…

…what’s to say they’re NOT soulmates? I mean Karen wasn’t in Bobby’s restful Heaven in 10x17 but Rufus sure felt real-er than any of the memories in 7x10… 10x20 proved you could access your Heaven pre-death so let’s make some wiggle room that when someone is in that state of actively dying and retreating into the same memories that will create their Heaven, if their soulmate has access to your Heaven anywho it’s like Rufus finds a new door to go through and can drop by and visit Bobby in his own head in these special circumstances, in a reverse of how Amelia kept aaalmost making it to her shared Heaven with Jimmy while still in her own body

which makes it all the WORSE that Bobby ducks his reaper to become a ghost, and doesn’t go visit Rufus right away and then gets dragged to Hell by Crowley so he literally doesn’t see Rufus again until after 8x19

lol

* * *

now they’re all synchronised digging in their ears

and Sam is proposing group electric shocks

I’m glad this episode is still terrible all by itself

not mannequin episode terrible but like, conceptually, this monster of the week brings out some uniquely odd situations

throw in this episode’s special characterisation of everyone loud and angry and ready to shoot the others aaand there you have the recipe for it

* * *

Aw Rufus nooo

just cruel they made Bobby stab him while he was possessed

you know like flipping how Bobby killed Karen when SHE was possessed - he wouldn’t make the same mistake twice so this time the possessee is the one doing the stabbing

lol lol

I did not actually have an argument for Bobby x Rufus except for “it would be cute if they’d travelled the world hunting monsters in their youth, shame about Omaha sending them into two separate loner rage spirals for years after that” until just now

* * *

always amused by how they sellotape Bobby to the chair once they have him locked down

* * *

and then he pulls some truly awful faces being evil for them

* * *

With 5 minutes left of the episode, the worm quickly delivers a ton of exposition for us, aware that there still needs to be a funeral scene to fill out the last minute of the episode so it has to talk fast

> DEAN Who is she, this Eve bitch?
> 
> BOBBY The mother of all of us, and the end of all of you. By the time she’s done, there’ll be more creatures than humans. You’ll live in pens. We’ll serve up your young and call it veal.

*side-eyes Dean*

Anyway. Sounds familiar as the slightly less corporate version of season 7′s plot :P I suppose monsters are driven in the majority for their hunger to eat humans, and Leviathans were literally just the meanest monster

I can’t remember if Eve is older than them or not - both of them claimed to be older than angels but where do they rank against each other? Did she make them or did they co-exist in Purgatory? What IS the power structure in Purgatory??

* * *

Oh I forgot this episode also has a fake out Bobby death in it too, to make you think that they’d lost literally everyone close or related to them aside from Cas

wow there are a lot of reasons to dislike this episode :P

* * *

*sighs* 

*sad about Rufus*

* * *

> DEAN I mean at the end of the day, you two are family. Life’s short, and ours are shorter than most. We’re gonna spend it wringing our hands? Something’s gonna get us eventually, and when my guts get ripped out, just so you two know, we’re good. Blanket apology for all the crap that anybody’s done all the way around.
> 
> SAM Some of us pulled a lot of crap, Dean.
> 
> DEAN Well, clean slate.
> 
> SAM Okay.

Be handy if a member of your family betrayed you in the next 3-4 episodes and died in the next 6-7 so you could put that logic to the test and see how it really felt to lose someone who you felt had hurt you beyond measure but you loved anyway

* * *

that said, now I’ve cleared this hurdle I’m pretty sure I actually really like watching pretty much all the episodes from now on into early season 7 somewhere or other

in a really good pain sort of way 

eeep.


	17. 6x17

Near, far, wherever they were,[ I wrote a  _really_  long post about alternate worlds and stuff relating to this episode](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/137231143833/firstdrafted-elizabethrobertajones-starting) so I am officially banning myself from any weird musings on time and space below the cut

you’re welcome

* * *

The start of the recap literally reminds you what car they drive although you don’t realise they’re doing that, but just showing you a  really cool shot of the car for no reason

not generally something that needs recapping :P

* * *

The recap is so depressing because it reminds you about Ellen and Jo dying AND Rufus… I feel like pulling an initially whimsical AU episode after a tragedy (even if this episode does swing around to super depressing and doesn’t exactly start CHEERFUL either) is something the show does a lot. Like, for example, It’s a Terrible Life comes right after On The Head of a Pin and in the actual story that was to re-motivate them. In this case Bobby is broken up about Rufus but the raw mourning period passes on-screen with Ellen to look after him…

and then at the end of the episode that’s taken away and he never knows he had it >.>

* * *

Anyway, the cold open is perhaps the most hilarious death from any Final Destination movie

* * *

This is literally a Final Destination movie with the premise about the Titanic, just in case we weren’t clear what they were ripping off, since they cite sources on the Butterfly Effect :P

* * *

Bobby snarks Dean is acting like his wife. Hypothetically of course, not like Bobby has an actual wife stuffed up his sleeve

Then in hindsight you know he really was referring to his actual wife and it’s drawing a character parallel between Ellen and Dean, and we see that she is very supportive and presented as extremely good for his mental health… 

* * *

“He wasn’t just a poker buddy”

Bobby x Rufus confirmed

* * *

Oh god the car

_the car_

My brain feels itchy looking at the Impala’s numberplate not on the Impala :P

* * *

I love the build up to the reveal here: too subtle rock paper scissors moment, Bobby snarking about a wife in a way that could happen no matter what, Sam n Dean getting in the Wrong Car, and then immediately actually talking about Ellen as a mystery female character right as you’re ???, cut back to Bobby and there she is

I also like how she’s on the road and happy to leave for weeks at a time - although she pretty much just hangs around with Bobby in this episode so far as I remember, it’s nicely implied that she has her own life outside of them, and is either hunting or at least has Stuff to Do, and so her arrangement with Bobby is not just a wish fulfilment domestic arrangement like plonking a female character in his lap and being like “you’re married now” but actually appreciating the life she’d live outside of being his wife and how it would be in character for her to have this arrangement.

I mean I really liked Karen but I think it only works once to just drop a wife back on Bobby and have them in a cutesy domestic set up like that and I’m pretty sure I’d be complaining about turning Ellen into a stay at home housewife

* * *

This is one of those times Dean and Sam just plain break into the crime scenes

tbh it makes a lot more sense especially when they often find out about them through news articles etc so they might be a few days old by the time they get there… I know breaking and entering isn’t exactly the SAFEST thing to do but they really rely so much on fake FBI these days it’s fun when they don’t :P

* * *

And Dean plays a university student to interview the next possible victim

Casually asking a guy in regular conversation if his ancestors could have done anything so dark it would sully future generations, you know, normal interview questions

..

I don’t know if this counts but I was cackling at the over-use of dramatic zoom and rolled my eyes and asked “who directed this!?” and it was Phil again, so that makes a rule of three on two times “this episode looks amazing who directed it” and one “this episode is so dorky who directed it?”

* * *

I really like how much Atropos looks and sounds like Elle Woods… Like with the glasses and the perfect blonde hair I can’t unsee it :P For some reason Legally Blonde just feels like a very good reference point for Lawful Good characters and makes a great deal of sense to parallel them beyond the looks (I think Atropos probably is actually neutral rather than good - I was paralleling her to Tessa earlier… But on the other hand she is the wronged party in this episode, not the villain… that would be Balthazar and Cas :P If you extract her morality from human thinking and see the people she kills as abhorrent to her because they shouldn’t exist, then she becomes sympathetic enough to contemplate that her personal moral code might work in a way she is being “good” by its terms… 

I spend a lot of time writing characters like her :P)

* * *

Once again Dean is framed with an orange window behind him… This has been going on all season and this deep into the season if we’re taking it as a warning, then the last Dramatic Orange Lighting thing to happen is a certain scene coming up between him and Cas which surely, surely is the last thing he needs warning about…? 

* * *

Ellen has been holding or preparing fresh healthy vegetables the entire time she’s on screen I swear… She’s like this beacon of “eat your greens” 

with a bonus of “fresh fruit of doom” since obviously her existence is in threat

I think it’s just that fresh fruit/veggies represent a wholesomeness and purity that just isn’t natural in their world - I mean you can go all the way back I think it was in season 2 where Dean was complaining about road food, but they eat junk food as a lifestyle. And this comes up as an actual challenge in season 7….

* * *

Hey! Dean’s sitting on the end of the bed with a cup of coffee! We haven’t revisited the “Dean sits on the end of a bed with alcohol being angsty” theme in a while, so I thought it was over, but I think pretty much all of them were start of the season alcoholism and here in the AU he’s drinking coffee so a sneaky subversion of a brief theme? Idk

I like the motel room

it’s not the one from The French Mistake so that one ONLY existed on that episode :P

* * *

the conversation being baffled about the Titanic is such a good one

like, it’s perfectly natural for the way they operate, it builds up to the reveal gently, and is played so natural it relies entirely on the dramatic irony of the scene to give it that last depth to the viewer?

Snymelo episodes can be pretty good when they put their back into it :P Not sure I’m a full on fan because they’ve written some pretty weird/bad episodes but on the grand scale of things they are far from the worst writers and their good episodes are good.

they may have peaked early with this one though because it’s one of the classic episodes & I don’t know if I’d say they ever really stepped up this much again

* * *

Is the I P Freely thing a Simpsons joke or does it exist before that in the collective consciousness/pop culture? I feel like given Rowena and Lucifer are running around quoting the Simpsons in season 10 & 11 I should be keeping an eye out for other references :P

* * *

I’m not sure when Sam and Dean started keeping angel summoning stuff handy, but this does imply that they keep a ton of spell ingredients handy because that bowl is overflowing with whatever weird herbs those are

I’ve always wondered about the other stuff in their duffel bags aside from the top layers of like, flannel and jeans :P

* * *

It says a lot that the first time I watched this, I did nod vaguely and go “yeah okay that motive for un-sinking the Titanic is fair enough” 

* * *

I mean obviously there is something sinister at work here, but really, if you were of mandatory school disco age in the 90s or early 2000s….

* * *

> BALTHAZAR: Because that God-awful Celine Dion song made me want to smite myself. 

* * *

Balthazar confirmed 90s kid

* * *

> BALTHAZAR:  And you still averted the Apocalypse, and there are still Archangels. It’s just the small details that are different, like you don’t drive an Impala. (Sam & Dean look confused.) Yes, yes. “What’s an Impala?” Trust me, it’s not important 

ERROR

Although presumably the Mustang came to Stull and did what the Impala did, so in THIS universe it’s the focal point, just as Baby was in the one we saw. 

So in a way it’s not important what the car was, just that there IS a car and yet this deep into the show, pretty much every viewer should be like “WRONG” when Balthy says that because we’ve been conditioned to think of Baby as a character with her own PERSONAL contribution :P

* * *

Balthazar helps himself to some alcohol that was lying around, and I’m seeing a weird parallel to 6x06 which goes back to my original reading of the scene as fucked up but supportive of Dean when Cas was pouring him a drink, just because Balthy is doing a negative version of that action by wandering around their motel room helping himself 

* * *

Same writers, so you know

* * *

Oh wow I forgot how “you have me confused with the other angel” is delivered… like, straight to Dean’s face, excluding Sam from the equation. Of course we’ve already had the “ask your boyfriend” and Sam (soulless!sam) making a retort about Cas not helping or whatever. In a way this is just levelling the playing field and there’s the more open and ambiguous phrasing ignoring the camera to suggest that Balthy is talking to the both of them so it can be an annoying platonic love that causes him just as much problems, although the context of “ask your boyfriend” implies how Balthy really feels

That is to say, I think it’s fair to assume Balthazar has at least got a crush on Cas if not more, and at the very very least is jealous of his attachment to the Winchesters and probably got no little amusement out of suggesting Sam commit patricide, or volunteering them for the French Mistake excursion and Cas agreeing to that… It’s interesting to track his arc and possible feelings just because this episode has Cas call off this attempt to win the war just for the Winchesters (still plural, all the time) and eventually Balthazar gets worried enough about Cas to turn on him and work WITH the Winchesters hoping to actually save Cas from himself. Anyway this episode offers an explanation in hindsight of how right now Balthy could see the attachment to the Winchesters as a weakness or distraction aside from the little hints we’ve had because it compromises this mission of theirs so much. Like, perhaps he always feared it would come down to this choice and Cas would pick them? (Meanwhile meta!Edlund writing lines in his script about Cas saying Balthazar isn’t exactly trustworthy but too scared of Raphael and backed into a corner to be anything but loyal to Cas because it’s his only option for even remotely having a chance at surviving the fight…)

Like, there’s a lot of layers here, but since this is Gamble era they’re buried under the main text, which is a joke about Cas being in love with Dean/the Winchesters and since THAT is only a joke in the bleh “haha gaaay” way there’s a whole lot of context to imply that’s what you’re supposed to think first, even if it’s only a joke. This and season 7 have some of the most overt jokes (season 7 pretty much wraps on “he was your boyfriend first” :P) and because lol it’s just a joke the subtext is pretty much there to prove a truth under the snark or not rather than clawing for the reading to be gay in the first place… 

Starting off the Dean n Cas stuff with the “more profound bond” uttered  _by_  Cas, these 2 jokes from Balthazar tie together but the story is already telling us something different - that is, that the emotional story between Dean and Cas has more layers and complexity than Cas and Sam. And we have seen that Cas and Sam ARE close and care for each other this season even in their tiny interactions in ways that haven’t really been displayed all that much on screen except for perhaps the end of season 5 when there were some few but important Sam n Cas interactions. And we see again in season 7 how Sam and Cas definitely care for each other powerfully (7x01 as the main example). 

Buuut that still leaves us here with this thing from Balthy re: Cas x the Winchesters, and Dean and Sam at an imbalance in how those lines come across… Dean and Cas interact more, they fight more, and at the end of the season the heartbreak falls on Dean, and Cas’s motivations and fall from grace are focussed ON Dean after at least a token attept to make it about saving the world/Cas’s friends in general it comes down to a personal conversation between Dean n Cas alone. So giving us 2 equal statements from Balthazar only works on the surface level that these lines were delivered once to Sam and once ostensibly to Dean and Sam but with the focus on Dean… implying an either/or.

Not even getting into the water off a duck’s back that the comment has on Sam in 6x11, or that in this instance the reaction shots are entirely on Dean and all he does is look away and then Balthazar nopes out of the conversation

I don’t know why I’m re-explaining this all because it’s all been talked about a lot in fandom so this can’t possibly be the first place you find a discussion of it, but then on the other hand when I got to the Siren episode I felt the need to hash out every single argument from start to finish so maybe I just feel the need to have a statement on record for everything :P

Anyway, this is particularly insidious because despite literally having the words that Cas is in love with Dean (so it seems from the framing) come out of a character’s mouth, it’s a telling us one thing (just a gay joke, ugh) and showing us another - if it’s a “harmless” gay joke not meant to literally imply what it seems to be saying, it’s way too on the nose because that “profound bond” that separates Sam n Cas from Dean n Cas as a dynamic is a major part of the emotional storytelling of the season with an actual serious feeling of wondering if Cas could seriously be in love with Dean by the end, lending the comment far too much credibility to ignore before you even start wondering about Balthazar’s stake in all this and why he cares and keeps bringing it up and lashing out at them… 

(I remain somewhat of the opinion that the love triangle from Balthy’s POV is him, Cas, Winchesters, while in the narrative/our POV I guess it’s more him vs Destiel AND Cas’s concern in general for the Winchesters creating conflicts of interest… Personal vs Plot? He both brings in the whole romantic conflict element himself by harping on this, and seemingly diffuses it at the same time with the randomness of the accusations…)

This line fascinates me

* * *

OKAY Bobby’s house looks cleaner and tidier this episode but the exterior shot is the night time version of the one from the zombie episode we saw in 6x04 where the windows are STILL boarded up on the top floor

we never see upstairs so I am becoming EXTREMELY fascinated with what Bobby keeps up there, especially given the one time we left the immediate area we always see, Dean fell into an empty, abandoned room, implying Bobby pretty much lives in the 2-3 rooms we see all the time

* * *

> BOBBY: I mean Fate, like the Fates. Or one of ‘em, at least. (The book Bobby has in front of him shows three women sitting, holding a long gold thread.)
> 
> SAM: You mean like Greek mythology? Like the sisters?
> 
> BOBBY: Bingo.
> 
> DEAN: Nerd.

*shuffles awkwardly* I’m taking that accusation personally

Ehehehe not like one of my main characters is  _literally_  one of the other sisters

* * *

I made her blonde 100% because of this episode so thank you SPN for ruining my streak of ethnically diverse side characters

* * *

Also sort of named her after Felicia Day because I mean look at that root meaning of “Felicia” :P

* * *

listen it was NaNoWriMo and I was in a hurry and already thinking about SPN and Charlie had just been introduced and I was in love :P

* * *

> BOBBY:  Now we know what Balthazar did. It seems to me that maybe Fate is just trying to clean up the mess. 

Thanks Bobby <3

> BOBBY: Big difference between dying awful and never being born, Dean. 

Yeah, they’d know… they’ve literally argued with their own mother about the pros and cons of their never being born >.>

> BOBBY: Well, okay. What’s got your panties in a clench? 

Okay so Bobby doesn’t know everything about Dean :P 

* * *

I am pretty sure Bobby’s framed photo of him and Ellen they are literally wearing their clothes from this same episode

> DEAN: Oh, he’s bad enough with her. Think how he’d be if she was gone. 

_aaaaangst_

* * *

Oh no, the guy who gets hit by a bus is wearing a long pale coat 

that’s literally 2 episodes in a row this happens, with Rufus showing up wearing a Cas-like coat

this guys is also shown as being a real jerk and dying because he wouldn’t stop and listen to them aka heed the warnings… And I should probably add that my heart was too busy breaking to type it down but Bobby stabbing Rufus was a direct visual parallel to Dean stabbing Cas on their first meeting, including the way it had a reaction shot of Rufus looking up, except horrified and dying instead of smug and invincible like Cas was

* * *

Can’t believe for a few minutes Sam and Dean were actually literally fated to die in a random gas explosion

they don’t seem like the sort who’d ever go out that way

* * *

They really need to learn to be more suspicious when their torches stop working

* * *

HEY CAS

* * *

> CASTIEL Well, I imagine she harbors a certain degree of rage toward you.
> 
> SAM What did we do?
> 
> CASTIEL Nothing of import – just the tiny matter of averting the Apocalypse and rendering her obsolete. I think maybe she’s a little irritated about that. And then you go and dangle yourselves in front of her…

I love snarky season 6 Cas like nothing else

At the very least when Cas is being an adorable fluffy version of Cas, it’s worth remembering this exists in him :P

* * *

Cas is so calm about saying “kill fate” 

Pretty sure he and Balthy were planning to do that all along anyway not just because of the threat she posed to Sam and Dean but because of the threat she posed to THEM. She might have taken the chance to go for the Winchesters just out of spite but also because it would hurt Cas (and he wanted to hurt her first)…

… I’m not even sure Cas isn’t using them as bait the entire time because he knows they need to kill her to safeguard their plan, and she’d go for them, and hey, it draws her out and the Winchesters seem to come up with their plan all by themselves

him referencing the phrase “tempting fate” does make me think Balthy floated the plan and Cas is parroting him….

… you know like him parroting the whole “superman going to the darkside” idea except not quite so earth-shatteringly revealing of betrayal :P

Anyway Cas wusses out of confrontation with Atropos here, and saves them, but he’s quick to agree about the bait thing and lead them into suggesting it so I think perhaps he was mostly just kind of getting permission to do it because he’s not TOTALLY merciless even this season :P

* * *

Ellen was upstairs in Bobby’s house so despite the windows being boarded up they’re clearly using it

* * *

Uuugh

> ELLEN So, not just me, but Jo, too?
> 
> BOBBY They’re not gonna sink the boat. I promise. The boat stays. You don’t have to worry.
> 
> ELLEN Well…If it was meant to be, then…I guess whatever happens, happens.
> 
> BOBBY But that’s just my point. Nothing’s “meant to be.” Whether we’re together is at the whim of some dick angel.
> 
> ELLEN Oh, Bobby, relax.
> 
> BOBBY I can’t. We need you. Especially me.
> 
> ELLEN I know.

This in context of Cas at the end admitting to sinking the ship again so the people never existed that they had been trying to save… Picking the Winchesters over those people (who he could have indirectly helped save although not his main motivation ever by killing Atropos - and I suppose her sisters too :P) and Bobby here putting the potential bloody deaths of 50k people beneath Ellen continuing to exist… Ellen says the same thing about them never being born being better (which is something that makes the end of the episode comforting that it wasn’t murder, just restoring natural order) but there are still a lot of questions asked about what huge stupid gestures you do for love, including everyone having a very subjective opinion on what to do about all the extra people, and playing with their life and death. Bobby here deciding better to have them all in danger/potentially murdered is where Cas is with his season-long motivation to do everything no matter the cost to win this war - putting his motivation down as for Dean, when it comes down to it.

So of course, Bobby paralleled to Cas doing the same thing in his actual marriage

I’m still dubious though that Dean n Cas weren’t married in this AU just because hey it’s an alternate continuity and the parallel with Ellen is here :P

* * *

also no I’m not ignoring the “we need you, I need you” in there

* * *

and the “I know” to a declaration of love I mean

* * *

Considering the episode’s title, there’s good music in the episode

* * *

A lot of yellow and gold in the street section. Yellow seemed to be linked strongly to death/Death in Appointment in Samarra so it makes sense with this whole tempting fate walk Sam and Dean do… Atropos and the Fates were specifically linked to gold thread for the treads of fate, so it’s possible it actually does go This Deep for once as a near surface reading :P

* * *

Haha and then Cas walking around unknowingly observing the Winchesters and having this whole conversation with Atropos with them in the background unable to listen in (because they’re frozen in time)… little bit of Cas POV early before 6x20 and it’s worth mentioning now before we get into the conversation that Cas sends them back with the memories of what they knew (Fate was out to get them for what they’ve done) without the full story. Cas sinks the ship again or takes credit for the decision and sells the story to them in a way very fitting how Crowley accuses  him of selling the lie of the “good Cas”… obviously way more complex than just that, but there’s a deception here from Cas within the episode and we’re really being asked to be suspicious of not just his methods but his motives too, while The French Mistake just focussed on the first

* * *

I like how Cas tries to make small talk with Atropos

* * *

> ATROPOS Not get emotional?! I had a job. God gave me a job. We all had a script. I worked hard. I was really, really good at what I did…Until the day of the big prize fight.And then what happens? You throw out the book! 

I love the consistency with everyone describing it as a script or pages or whatever. Pretty sure there was a line very similar in 6x03 as well according to the recap on this episode

This universe is very based on words and writing, since Metatron takes and explores the concept that words and storytelling, in a self-aware fictional universe, are the most important things

There’s a real conflict between the idea of going off-script and leaving the story behind completely after the book was supposed to end, and the idea of writing your own story

in a way despite Cas’s attempts to wrangle the metaphor, Gamble era is all flailing around this, and it’s only with Metatron’s introduction that the theme of them writing their own story really appears on the show, and taken down to a human level (literally) for Cas. No one’s really got a handle on the big story, but they’re capable of writing the stories in their own sphere of influence?

And in Cas’s case actually that line about Dean telling him he needs new friends and Cas being like “I’m trying to save the ones I’ve got” sums up the story Cas should be writing? Like, just appreciate them and hope to be appreciated in turn, because this is the only thing you really have any control over (Hard lesson to learn first >.> Not everyone *literally* tries being God first while learning boundaries… :P)

* * *

> CASTIEL Well, I’m sorry. But freedom is more preferable.
> 
> ATROPOS Freedom? This is chaos! How is it better?

*endless sobbing about Cas*

* * *

> CASTIEL I’m sorry. But your services are no longer required. 

is he literally her boss?

I suppose if she’s another order of angels, Cas was/is fairly high ranking 

leader of the rebellion though because I’m pretty sure a living archangel represents the entrenched power so she SHOULD be answering to Raphael if she is under Heaven’s jurisdiction… Maybe he’s just taking liberties with being the leader of that faction and just acting as if he is already in charge of everything

uhoh :P

* * *

> ATROPOS Bull crap. This isn’t about some stupid movie. He’s under your orders. You sent him back to save that ship.
> 
> CASTIEL No, I didn’t. Why would I?
> 
> ATROPOS Oh, maybe because you’re in the middle of a war and you’re desperate?

Aaaand there’s the first time in season 6 you’re supposed to be openly suspicious of Cas now :(

I don’t know if Atropos is actually sympathetic to people who don’t gravitate towards her character type as inherently fascinating (sorry :P) but the fact that Cas is lying and trying to avoid claiming responsibility IS clearly apparent as he tries to deny everything and so however you feel about her, she is being used to show that Cas is at the very least now meant to be untrustworthy

> ATROPOS Come on. This is about the souls.
> 
> CASTIEL You don’t know what you’re talking about.
> 
> ATROPOS That angel went and created 50,000 new souls for your war machine.
> 
> CASTIEL You’re confused.

She uses Death’s almost exact phrasing “about the souls” for the sake of making you vividly recall that, and so to be fair on detective!Dean if he’s not allowed to hear this then he’s missed his most obvious clue, but this also tells us that Death knows what Cas is up to and so in one line there is an attempt to tie up all the plot threads

(I’m never going to be convinced that season 6 was well-told but on the other hand the plot salvages as much as it can from this point onwards to give the illusion that it was)

Anyway quoting Cas’s lines because once more we have a female character who is much smarter and on the ball about plot things pointing out the obvious and a male character denying it and calling her confused - last happened back in the prison episode with Victor and the lawyer who was on Dean’s case. In this case Cas is actually fully aware of the fact he’s in the wrong, so despite sounding wholly unconvincing, his attempt to shake off the accusations is just to pretend they don’t exist and she’s made it up

I’m not too fond of them making Cas do that but on the other hand I am quite amused that you could accuse the writers of changing the past of season 6 to fit the present plotline they settled on better and Cas’s response being the show extremely unconvincingly trying to tell us they haven’t just made a really sketchy decision that creates un-sunk Titanic level holes in their earlier plot :P

* * *

Anyway Cas is suffering so much to do this - he really has a long moment of headaching about this before going on the offensive 

* * *

I do like how she just *knows* that Sam and Dean are Cas’s weak point

see also: Cas (but realistically Balthazar) also knowing it and coming up with the whole use them as bait to get her thing

* * *

*reverently touches the Impala*

* * *

What is UP with Dean’s eyes this season?

* * *

> CASTIEL I wanted you to know who Fate really is. She’s cruel and capricious.
> 
> DEAN I’d go so far as “bitch.”
> 
> CASTIEL Well, yeah. You’re the ones who taught me that you can make your own destiny. You don’t have to be ruled by fate. You can choose freedom. I still believe that that’s something worth fighting for. I just wanted you to understand that.
> 
> DEAN So, wait. Did…Balthazar really, uh, unravel the sweater over a chick flick?
> 
> CASTIEL Yes. Absolutely. That’s what he did.

you know in hindsight of season 11 it’s pretty impressive how much Dean absolutely trusts Cas all over again that he didn’t make the Lucifer connection because wow is Cas unconvincing on that last line and then of course Dean finds out it was a betrayal and so you know, maybe start paying attention when Cas acts weird because something is probably up and you’d think ignoring instinct on how dodgy some of the things he said and did were this season might have taught some lessons?

Nah, it’s CAS. 

Anyway, Cas sells them the story, Dean continues calling female characters “bitch” because of course he does, and Cas spouts some philosophy that is actually true and what Cas is fighting for as a sort of ideal, but woooow does it all go bitter in 6x20 when we discover how he’s been fighting for it, and even here showing us just an example of dodgy practices that he then doesn’t own up to… It’s now established he’s lying and even if he believes these principles and free will honestly IS the best “moral” option in this universe, we’re coming to a “but at what cost”

… of course Dean n Cas quietly and without maybe realising they’d done it, broke up over “peace or freedom” in 5x22 and that same fracture is slowly running between them all season with the crack growing wider all the time. Dean very nearly went for “peace” in 5x18 and that was why Cas beat him up in the alley scene - for giving up and wanting to take the easy way after teaching Cas to go the difficult route and fight for this belief. Dean still embodies and values freedom and so on but he has a much more complicated view on it… this is also starting to get into the territory of how he calls Cas a child so many time times coming up, because that also ends up being about their philosophies…

should really wait until 6x20 to get into all that

*vibrates slightly*

I caaan’t

* * *

> DEAN Wow. Well, might be time to take away his cable privileges. Besides, “Titanic” didn’t suck that bad. (Sam gives Dean a look) Winslet’s rack.
> 
> (Castiel disappears)
> 
> DEAN I’ll tell you one thing about Cas, he does not appreciate the finer things.

laughing because whether he was just done with that conversation seeing it had reached a conclusion on things he was there to discuss or noping out because Dean talking about perving on naked ladies, Cas does seem to give that impression of the latter :P Like, talk about a jealous strop because your crush hasn’t noticed you yet. 

honestly, for stringing together with Balthazar accusing Cas of being in love with Dean, Cas going off in a strop because of this, and Dean’s line possibly laden with implications about why Cas wouldn’t care for naked ladies you got a whole lot of borderline jokey Destiel subtext focussed on pointing at Cas and going “gaaaay”…

Again, accusation this is all queercoding because he’s about to be revealed as the villain of the season but hey that doesn’t all just fall off and stop existing when he’s redeemed and back to a regular main character on the other side :P If not for the end of season 6 we wouldn’t have SUCH a strong argument for just HOW in love Cas is with Dean in hindsight as I don’t think another season pushes Cas’s side of things this much until season 9, rather focussing on Dean from the betrayal onwards…

it’s pretty sketchy in this episode but I’ll take it on the understanding this was not the end and Cas is still in love with Dean many seasons later >.>

* * *

*episode ends on very sad Bobby feels*

…. and to go back to that Dean and Ellen parallel that we opened on, Dean’s the one who goes and pulls a blanket over Bobby and takes the book out of his hand that he’s fallen asleep holding. They might not be able to support Bobby EXACTLY like a wife would, but it’s showing that even with that unknown loss, they still all care for each other and support each other? I kind of like it. Although really was anyone this good to Dean after he loses his spouse in a few episodes? :P

* * *

*little bemused about Bobby having a photo of himself on his own in his own yard framed in his house especially as it would be recent within the last year or so since he’d been married to Ellen for it to be the same photo but with her absent

shhhh Lizzy

shhhhhhhhhhhhh


	18. 6x18

I have been reliably informed that my Dabb vs Cars vendetta will extend to Dabb vs horses so I’m just going to bite my lip and enjoy the dress up & then reblog whatever [@kayanem](https://tmblr.co/mqDd4r4TyqDdraQ4Q827nog) said about this :P

* * *

Aw no the first thing you see in the recap is Ellen in the background in Bobby’s house back in 2x22

TOO SOON

* * *

I like the idea that in the past all monster hunts were concluded with a duel 

I never want to know anything else about how hunters worked in those days, this is too funny

* * *

This episode has time stamp snark from Dabbflin, something that makes the experience of my  _favourite_  episode they ever wrote 100x better

I always feel in good hands when I see “48 hours earlier (and 150 years later)”

* * *

We just drop straight in on Sam n Dean n Bobby breaking into the Campbell compound without any real explanation. Their finding the library is kind of like finding the Bunker but rather less dramatic and considerably more underwhelming when you think about the introduction to the Bunker

… I still think it’s a crime, if they’re the last standing Campbells  _because they murdered the rest of their family, okay,_  that they don’t mention ever coming back to this place to get books… Like I understand it could be plot-breaking if they found ALL the potential cures, but on the other hand, sometimes the plot needs breaking when they need to solve something quickly and they never use this resource again :P I have to think Bobby took crates of books with him between scenes for my own sanity.

* * *

I’d assume based on the family speciality it’s more of a monster lore treasure trove than relating to demons and angels and Teh Darkness and Mark of Cain or whatever else…

… although Cain’s bloodline came through  _one_  of their families and it seems to be implied the Campbell line just if we go with John being Michael’s vessel and assuming there’s a correlation that the better Lucifer vessels would be in the Cain bloodine just on principle, ergo if the Winchester side was Michael’s vessels it seems more likely to be this way around?

NO ONE EXPLAINS HOW THIS ALL WORKS EVER

but if this was a thing then maybe the Campbells would have been paying attention… Season 2 confirmed in a few episodes that the demons had been pulling attempts to start the apocalypse for a long time, with many historical huge demon related things specifically about it, such as the Roanoak thing testing Croatoan for the first (?) time. And Samuel Colt was inspired to make the great big Devil’s Trap in the first place, around a Gate of Hell,  and in season 1 Bobby says it’s like 7 demon things a year tops back when they were a problem more along the lines of the Phantom Traveller demon as a default monster hunters would encounter, and then demons such as Azazel and Crowley were walking the earth making deals but very low key and off the radar and only discovered to have been at it by later plot happenings… So whatever inspired Colt to need to make a gun that could kill demons and put in all this hard work means SOMETHING was stirring up back in this time. Basically, if the Winchester and Campbell lines were all involved in supernatural stuff anyway through hunting or MoL, then it’s likely that previous generations got dragged in and were connected to these events… Case in point, they have Colt’s journal… which could have been collected for info on past events in an in-between attempt, or could have just been in the family the whole time…

I do think that there’s a chance they’re actually secretly related to him without realising it (the name Samuel for one thing) and I like the dramatic irony that adds to season 1 & 2 so I go along with it as a headcanon ever since this episode :P I mean, Sam just shot one grandpa called Samuel in the last 2 episodes, he needs a replacement figure in his family history to be cool with the name? Samuel Campbell literally pulled that on Sam right before he shot him

Anyway it’s been pointed out a few times in fandom that Mary had a MoL aquarian star on her charm bracelet, which at the time was probably just a random symbol but now with heavy retconning and the fact that we know hunters worked with MoL, is interesting… I do wonder just WHAT was being kept track of… How much of the main plots over the years has already been written down but inaccessible to them. If the bloodlines had already been understood by a man of letters, or if the Winchesters and the Campbells just kept getting pulled into this crap and didn’t even realise the fact Destiny was out to get them…

* * *

incidentally while we’re talking about depressingly realised fire-adjacent monsters re: season 6 and shitty dragons

OKAY so the phoenix was a BAMF and they gave him a cool outfit and a backstory and all sorts of stuff but on the other hand “giant flaming bird” does not equal dude in a cowboy hat, and I am always sad we didn’t get to see that side of him :P

* * *

I absolutely love Dean’s “you won’t believe what I’ve got” face when he’s reading the journal before he shows it to anyone, but he keeps looking up with barely restrained glee….

Okay I KNOW (after going through my saved gifsets in my drafts a billion times to make all the other post episode queues) I don’t have gifs of this so I guess I’ll make it… Bah there isn’t really anywhere boring in this episode to get distracted and do it. >.>

* * *

Curse you good episoooode *shakes fist*

* * *

Things I have learned from scavenging a folder full of screencaps for giffing:

Gee sure would be useful to have a character with passing familiarity to deciphering languages that looked like that some time in say season 9

There was an Elkins historically who kept bothering Colt about weird shit happening in town, and it was an Elkins who had the gun in the future/6 years ago/40 years ago so I’m guessing it didn’t pass through too many hands, which is PROBABLY how it kept a very low profile, since if it never moved far or wide, then the myths about it couldn’t really build up, while if it kept passing hands then eventually someone or other would know there were some hunters who kept using a gun that could kill everything :P

(Sorry about the weird squished screencaps, I’m not un-fucking them just for this and VLC player and me are on poor terms this month :P)

* * *

I know they’re talking about time travel backwards but I’m staring distraught into the future of 11x14 and Dean thinking he could just ask Cas to time travel them again 

Also, you know, “i never want to do that again”

* * *

“Time travel. That’s a reasonable plan?”

* * *

I suppose Dean did literally just get the reminder from 6x17 that angels can time travel

I love this world view of “eeeeeh okay so Fate is totally pissed at us for fucking with Destiny and we literally nearly just got murdered to death by her on principle, and she takes extremely poorly to you messing with the past and we have seen she has good reason for that because you can create huge problems for the world and yourself by doing that and you know messing with the Colt is probably a bad idea because it’s played such an integral role in our lives but what if we LOST it or used up ALL THE BULLETS IN 1861…. But on the other hand what if we just go to the past and do one tiny eenie weenie little thing that no one will even notice I mean it’s totally cool as long as we don’t step on any butterflies or kill our own grandfather before we were supposed to actually kill our grandfather”

* * *

Dean is so excited to call Cas though because he’s all hyperactive about his plan and just in a really good mood… Awww. 

I feel it’s probably important that next episode also starts with praying for Cas to come help them, but that’s Dean’s grumpy “why do I always have to make the call” - I’m going to let this one sit until I watch it because I’d prefer fresh context to blah on about it so I guess all I can really do here is think about the context of Cas showing up unexpectedly to save them last episode, and Cas graciously allowing them the memories of the whole Fate and Titanic thing to show that Cas is awesome and Fate sucks lol we’re Team Free Will… Clearly it’s WORKED so Dean is in a cheerful mood with Cas. Obviously he still gets blind sided later by the reveal but this is as excited as he gets all season to see Cas for the fun of teamwork and adventure and doing cool shit with angels and all the stuff where it’s worked to put Dean in a really good headspace right this second. I don’t think he starts to actually doubt Cas or anything but he’s spent so much of this season pissed off with him, that we’re in a very brief window of positive feelings which aren’t going to make it through the next like 1 minute because….

* * *

Hi Rachel!

She furthers the whole “all the angels are already fed up with Cas and the Winchesters” thing Balthazar’s been exuding - I feel like she appointed HERSELF as Cas’s secretary or whatever the prayer equivalent is for answering the phone since she calls herself his lieutenant but takes time to do this, because Cas being dragged away by the Winchesters or running into them while having a normal day at work immediately = Cas not getting the day back until he’s done everything he can for them. He’s literally just suffered a huge setback/loss that he *could* have brute forced his way through if he hadn’t cared so much about the Winchesters… 

Yeah I think Heaven was already well aware of the problem, and his faction is trying to keep itself together by keeping Cas away from them :P

(I think it’s interesting just because the confrontation ends up Cas breaking ties with the Winchesters, hurting Sam, and doing the thing anyway, so he DOES put his attempt to save the world over them once the issue is forced - taking the long run view it’s for their own good and they just don’t know it/understand :P - so all this resistance and conflict is just character stuff because Cas passes his point of no return before the end of the season… Perhaps I’d be analysing this backwards as a bad thing if season 6 was our end point but again, too many seasons on the other side of this for Cas as a villain foreshadowing to do anything long-term… rather drawing parallels to “softer” moments like 9x22 and Hannah asking Cas to pick between Dean and his angel army, stuff like that :P)

Rachel also says she’s Cas’s friend, very confrontationally towards them as if to tell them they’re nothing special and Cas has lots of friends. Between Cas seeming to be at least a friend of Atropos’s in the past, and Balthazar being introduced as a pre-existing friendship, there’s an emphasis this season on the angels Cas knows personally. Probably the most loyal people and the ones fighting most prominently for him are the ones who he was always friends with and he started there, cashing in favours… in later seasons the majority of random angels don’t seem to know him personally - I think Hannah even had to introduce herself to him? While other angels he knows by name but doesn’t seem like he was that close to them and they know each other by reputation, so I’d guess he lost all his friends in Heaven by the end of the Godstiel arc…

Anyway, we have some serious jealousy about Cas’s divided time, and she calls them out:

> RACHEL I’m his friend.
> 
> SAM What, you think we’re not?
> 
> RACHEL I think you call him when you need something. We’re fighting a war.
> 
> SAM We get that.
> 
> RACHEL Clearly you don’t, or you wouldn’t call him every time you stub your toe, you petty, entitled little pie–

I think it’s important to look back at the times earlier in the season when they were calling Cas for help and there were moments where he clearly made the decision to do so because he cared, for all he was prickly about it the entire time. It’s definitely far more complex than she makes out and of course from Sam and Dean’s POV they call Cas because he’s a friend and they trust him, as much as because he can be useful - in some ways he’s of use to them BECAUSE he’s a friend which is the sort of mutual support you SHOULD have where you can ask your friends for help… There’s even been a few implications Dean had been calling and been rejected for emotional support in between times when Cas showed up for the plot, highlighting that there is a crack between them friendship-wise  _because_  Cas has been inaccessible this season they haven’t been able to grow the mutually beneficial relationship that could have existed? 

And of course Cas showing up to help anyway when Rachel is having this rant undermines her point entirely because if there’s blame here for Cas wasting time on the Winchesters, it’s all on him for even showing up when he had a choice not to :P

* * *

It’s implied a chunk of time passed between Cas saying he’d help them, and them at Bobby’s, Dean disappeared off to get costumes, and whatever else was happening (Bobby helping himself to the library for example)… Cas seems to have just been lurking in the doorway when we cut to him finally voicing an opinion that it will be hard to bring them back after 24 hours… While I like to assume he could do the maths instantly, it’s pretty funny to imagine he was calculating the entire time…

* * *

Bless this episode for letting even Cas take a crack at Dean and his blanket.

When Cas has snark about how you’re dressing you really should take a step back 

* * *

Dean’s momentary sadness about Bobby giving him the dragon hoard to spend in the past and then a “yeah fair enough” look…

we never see the dragon hoard again

farewell, Dean’s wealth

* * *

I still think it’s hilarious Dean dresses up and Sam doesn’t… He even puts his regular jacket on over the shirt so he really just seems to be wearing regular Sam clothes except a plain white shirt :P

His shirt DOES have yellow roses embroidered on the shoulders, however, and THAT is the sort of thing [people write huge long metas about](http://hearseeno.tumblr.com/post/105084137174/visual-motifs-flowers-mystery-secrets-and) - the visual parallel to Mary is enforced that a picture of her in the white top with the red roses on the shoulders was the picture Sameul had and showed them in Caged Heat. Now Sam’s basically wearing the yellow version… 

Anyway, this episode is also one of MANY times Dean ends up in the non-standard clothes and Sam keeps on being Sam, by and large. :P I think this is the most blatant example - 2 of the time travel episodes Dean needed outfits to blend in for and Sam wasn’t even in the past with him so while Dean got to dress up, Sam had a free pass by not going. The LARP episode stands out to me as another where Sam passed up dressing up for most of the episode. And then episodes like It’s a Terrible Life, Dean Smith was a snappy dresser and Sam Wesson had the most boring yellow polo shirt ever… (Actually, mentioning the LARP episode, literally the next time we saw Charlie after that we had the gratuitous Dean dressing up in HER djinn dream which Sam also passed on, although none of that was done intentionally from a character POV it enforces the pattern…)

I just think Dean being excited about clothes is really sweet and I’m glad he gets a lot of chances to do it :P

* * *

There is so much non-swearing in this episode. This is one of the only other episodes where hard swearing is definitely intended in canon rather than being censored to family friendly-ish words that we hear coming out of their mouths.

(I am amused a lot that, even though it was a blooper that made it into the episode rather than a writing choice, the other time this happens is in a Dabb episode - the “who gives a fuck” they slipped into 8x08 by censoring it with traffic noises or something :P)

* * *

Okay I suppose the phoenix’s surname is Finch so he is a bird technically?

Pfft

* * *

I am sure people must have written about Dean’s disillusionment about the blanket as a small example of his personality trait of getting way too sold on stories and generally having these false ideals - I mean we have 6x20 coming up which for Dean is basically that, but he’s always, from the start, had romanticised notions about all sorts of things, from “confusing reality with porn” to his ideas about them as hunters and the life they lead… and as the media savvy character this episode especially highlights his reality vs fiction struggle with the cowboy genre, and that genre in itself is one of the reasons he has romanticised ideas about being a hunter especially in the early seasons, as he sees himself as a guy who rides from town to town saving people and I’m pretty sure the show is described metatextually that way too a fair amount… 

Anyway no biggie just watching Dean’s dreams get crushed :P

* * *

I’m laughing

> SAM Uh, we’re looking for a man.
> 
> JUDGE MORTIMER I’ll bet. (gesturing to Dean) Nice shirt, there.
> 
> DEAN What’s wrong with my shirt?
> 
> JUDGE MORTIMER You’re very clean.
> 
> DEAN It’s dirtier than it looks.
> 
> SAM We need to find Samuel Colt. Do you know him?

I was literally just saying about Sam’s pristine white shirt, and Dean’s in an all black shirt, and the guy still picks on him? This is ANOTHER one of the many mistaken for gay moments where it’s all, in this case, implausibly, Dean’s fault and Sam is skating by because somehow by not caring he’s exuding an aura of fitting in or SOMETHING because no one’s questioning him. Dean is trying too hard, poor thing. Anyway Dean does not miss this accusation and then seems about ready to argue all day about how clean his shirt is or isn’t, and Sam, sensing a ridiculous awkward pit they are about to fall in, steers Dean around it by getting them back on subject when Dean is still harping on the accusation.

This exchange is pretty blatant even on its own about implying Dean’s clothing choices somehow exude queer subtext that even these gnarly old blokes pick up on… :P

His relationship with this queer subtext, his love of costuming and the movies, his inaccuracy or whatever in his cosplay that pings everyone’s radars or make them see him over Sam as not fitting in, heck the fact his first crush was a cowboy themed wrestler (in an episode from one of the same writers no less) would all be a very interesting meta for someone who did not recently gulp down a large dose of strong cold medicine :P

* * *

Dean, bless his soul, still walks into the saloon with the hope it will be awesome, and still has dreams left to shatter for the “this is not awesome” line.

* * *

> DEAN Oh, uh, okay. Great. I’ll have your top-shelf whiskey.
> 
> ELKINS Only have the one shelf.
> 
> DEAN That’ll do just fine. (pointing to Sam) And he’ll have a sarsaparilla.

*must… reassert… masculinity*

* * *

*must… not… kiss… woman…*

* * *

*chokes on a drink too strong even for Dean Winchester*

* * *

Oh honey you are having a terrible time in your supposedly macho fantasy for manly dudes like yourself… 

I like how he has to get over himself like 10 times before he can participate in the plot. There’s still sort of plot going on in the background but mostly this is just a whirlwind tour of Dean learning that the past sucked… He relaxes into it and when he stops being so anxious to get it right or enjoy the fantasy version of it he does better >.>

* * *

> SHERIFF Rope didn’t kill him. Seen it before. 

I wonder how often they hung monsters without realising it

* * *

Sam and Dean talking about how Elkins barely knows Colt and then Colt’s journal is like spoilers! now he won’t leave me alone!

heheh

* * *

Dean finally finds some safe ground to talk about being a posse magnet when there are no grizzled wild west men to put him down, just his endlessly patient brother who deals with this all the time and knows exactly how to just let it happen and wait for Dean to be done so they can move on with their lives and Dean can go back to feeling about as close to good about himself as he gets :P

I know he’s talking about the laaaydies but it has always amused me that the posse would all be made up of more dudes so a  _posse_  magnet would literally just be a guy good at attracting sexy cowboys

* * *

him laughing to himself about this is just adorable though…

* * *

“how am I supposed to get there and back before noon?” 

You’re in a Dabb episode, I think you have it covered if you had to make a transatlantic crossing there and back before the deadline

* * *

Cas interlude! \o/

(After the phoenix gets some more BAMF revenge. I know I was joking about him being a crappy bird, but he is a great character aside from that :P)

* * *

Cas is a much better bird because he actually has wings

* * *

Here follows some of the silliest dialogue to talk around the big plot spoilers, because side characters always know when it’s not time to just blurt out everything because the main characters don’t know it yet… Even when they’re not just not in the room, but safely 150 years in the past

> CASTIEL You summoned me here?
> 
> RACHEL Castiel, I’ve been hearing things. Things I don’t want to believe. Just tell me if it’s true.
> 
> CASTIEL If what’s true?
> 
> RACHEL You know. Your dirty little secret.

*shakes head*

I wish I could like Rachel more because I usually stick up for the side characters, but she’s somehow extremely one note, perhaps because she has nothing but angry confrontations and she can’t even address the main plot points and get into a reasoned discussion about them because we don’t know yet, so even though one confrontation is angrily in Cas’s defence, and then like 10 hours later, angrily AGAINST Cas, we miss her hearing everything (spoooilers) and any of her realisation or doubt or anything, so she’s pretty much just here to shout at people, re-emphasise Cas’s looming betrayal so you can’t say the plot twist came out of nowhere after it came out of nowhere, and then die so it doesn’t make it out of this room. Like she has a ton of potential to be an interesting character and she certainly feels a lot and has had a lot of drama in the last day in her own personal world, but it’s not her story and it feels pretty obvious >.>

I mean like

> RACHEL We put our faith in you, and…look what you’re turning into. 

implies she HAS been suspicious and there’s a whole lot she’s worried about and this is an ongoing thing…. But on the other hand she was furiously defending him such a short time ago her turning on Cas is very abrupt and out of nowhere, leaving her just to illustrate the plot. 

Anyway Cas kills her and feels bad

and being endlessly sympathetic to Cas, *I* feel bad that he always ends up killing so many angels, although in this case it’s more because this is the trauma that he feels terrible about later and he has to get out the other side of all this. So my heart is bleeding for, like, season 8 Cas, choosing to stay in Purgatory, and feeling so wretched on his terrible attempts at redemption arcs.

* * *

I’m the actual worst for ignoring “cool motive still murder” when the motive is Destiel-adjacent :P

* * *

why was 6x20 even allowed 

what did Edlund do to us all

* * *

TECHNICALLY because Cas passes out on him, Bobby gets the first Cas hug of the show, which pleases my “they’ve been secret best friends the entire time” headcanon

“we running or fighting?”

you know it’s true

* * *

The saddest thought I have ever had is that if Dean came back from Frontierland to Bobby’s house, he probably stowed the get up at Bobby’s, and there’s a criminally short amount of time left before Bobby’s house goes up in smoke, and this costume probably went with it. :(

* * *

> ELKINS New hat.
> 
> DEAN I look good.

yes.

(I like how after all this commentary on Dean’s clothes, he FINALLY gets it right, and then suddenly everything is working for him. And Elkins has to admit it too. And Darla in the background practically fanning herself… Everyone has to stop and check out Dean, it’s the rules :P 

My other thought on where the entire dragon hoard went is “on this costume”)

* * *

There’s like maybe 4 things in the entire run of the show that make me laugh uncontrollably every time … 

> DEAN What are you talking about? Sheriff’s tough as nails. He’ll be here.
> 
> MAN (from outside the saloon) Oh, God! The Sheriff’s dead!
> 
> DEAN Or not.

gets me evvveeeryy time

* * *

*has a painful coughing fit all through Dean’s promotion thanks to this*

* * *

Be the man you were born to be, Dean

* * *

Colt is a BAMF. 

Also lives in a sturdy log cabin, compared to the flimsy wooden houses the town is built from - log cabins really come into their own from season 7 onwards thanks to Rufus’s cabin becoming home base, but it amuses me how often they’ve stayed in motels on that theme. I suppose it’s a hunter legacy thing - they get the gun from him almost as a legacy (but borrow from it early here :P) and Rufus passes on the cabin to them (unintentionally :P) … I should probably add there’s a difference between the log cabins and Sam’s dilapidated shacks, which seem to be regular houses but boarded up.

I dunno.

Cold medicine. 1am. Still chuckling about “oh God! the sherrif’s dead!” instead of concentrating

* * *

Now Dean’s finally come into his own in the past, even his weird references don’t confuse people in the same way that make them question him and Dean doubt himself - like, the self confidence has suddenly all shown up with the new hat. Also, I wonder, if because he’s working on his own without Sam around so he can immerse himself better? Sam doesn’t play along in the same way Dean always wants to - even when he gets too excited with cover stories or whatever and Sam gives him the stink eye, he gets held in check. And Sam doesn’t dress up.

But now Dean’s alone, in charge, properly attired, and he’s got this hilarious in control of the situation threatening-sexy banter with his new awful deputy… I swear the clothes double his charisma score and he’s play acting something or other and he’s utterly in the zone and it’s all just clicked for him

Aside from the borderline suggestive flash of the badge, 

> DEAN Missed you at the posse this morning. I was a one-man wolf pack, thanks to you. 

has set me off giggling again after the whole posse magnet thing

(oh god that line really has turned completely gay in my head, sorry Dean)

“one man wolf pack” is interesting just because of… literally everything about Dean, considering all the dog allusions and how he went to howl at the moon and so on… he’s emphasising his loneliness though, and even situational it’s silly and he doesn’t want this guy to  _really_  be his posse, I think it’s a good commentary of Dean being a guy who needs a posse? Teamwork is important, etc. Doesn’t like doing things alone. (Interesting that being alone and vulnerable after stropping off in season 9 is how Crowley got him to go down the path of howling at the moon in the first place…)

Anyway wolf packs have a whole lot of connotations of family and social structure…

* * *

> DEAN Finch said he was coming back for the former Sheriff…Judge Mortimer… and you. That’s two down and one to go. 

Detective!Dean!! 

* * *

Sam has spent a  _disproportionate_  amount of time this season with other Samuels. 

> SAM But you’re a hunter.
> 
> SAMUEL COLT Retired.
> 
> SAM There’s no such thing.
> 
> SAMUEL COLT I’m out.
> 
> SAM There is no getting out. Look, for what it’s worth, in my time, you’re a hero.
> 
> SAMUEL COLT Me?
> 
> SAM Yes, sir.

The theme of retirement keeps on coming up for Sam. We had him asked in an interview what was next for Sam Winchester, and now here Colt is trying to pretend he’s retired, while still at the very least with a foot in the door, and Sam proves that AND impresses him with deducing that the demons were here (detective!Sam! I possibly don’t yell about him enough but then on the other hand it always feels like there’s less to prove about Sam being a smart cookie, mostly because we don’t start from a baseline of Sam not believing it either :P)

Anyway, Sam gets no retirement yet, spoiler alert, but I think it was stuff like this with Sam having a lot of these thoughts floated around him, which led to him eventually taking time off? They’re pushing the idea in front of him, but the main plot is going to keep taking his chances to have it until the end of season 7, but this thee follows him and puts the idea of retirement on the table.

* * *

Sam also doesn’t make it weird to meet heroes.

* * *

not naming any names or pointing any fingers

* * *

> SAMUEL COLT (nods) Not bad. (Samuel opens his jacket so Sam can see the colt in his holster) You don’t want it. It’s a curse. Believe me.
> 
> SAM Great. Then let me take it off your hands.

Saaaam no that is not what we do with curses

(I feel this should be applicable just for the general self-sacrifice theme going with the Winchesters constantly)

Also: now I’m thinking of 9x11, the Cain stuff was a direct rip off of this encounter, except Sam came here under his own steam, and Colt was the one who killed the demons. Other than that Dean goes through all the same steps as Sam when impressing Cain.

I am now 100% convinced that the Colt is to them as the First Blade is, and Colt is their great great great something or other relation. They’re a family that collect curses :P 

All the more interesting that Dean used the Colt in many of the most dramatic encounters, and Sam’s most dramatic moment with it as far as I can recall was shooting NOT to kill with it.

And then Ruby re-worked it and the repaired version played a role in Sam’s season 3 downwards arc…

thoughts for non cold medicine times

* * *

Meanwhile Cas sleeps on the Sofa of Betrayal

(I don’t know why I called it that except that Dean sleeps on it too when Cas shows up in 6x20… Also Bobby was sleeping on it last episode, un-betrayed, so it’s more of the Sofa of Tragedy or something.)

ANYWAY they’re all taking turns to nap on the sofa

* * *

> CASTIEL I was, uh…I was betrayed. Rachel, uh…Raphael…He corrupted her. She turned on me. 

mmmhmmm

I bet Bobby would have been understanding if he’d told him :P

I mean yelled at him for like at least 55 minutes but they also need to rescue Sam and Dean from the past so in the last 5 minutes they’d sort it all out lalala happy ending

(I mean Cas and Bobby are literally paralleled at the beginning and end of the season for making deals with Crowley they then regret.)

* * *

> CASTIEL It’s your soul.
> 
> BOBBY What do you want me to do? Make another deal? Seal it with a kiss?

No offence but I’m pretty glad that never happened because it would have been really uncomfortable :P

(the jokes about “I need you to let me touch it” are bad enough)

* * *

Detective!Dean at it again with realising phoenixes are affected by iron

* * *

“ _Slash sheriff”_

* * *

Totally unrelated to that fandom-related giggling, Dean’s doing even worse flirty-menacing dialogue with the phoenix, including accusing him of “not being able to get it up for iron” 

honestly the amazing thing about Dean is he can kick off an episode with his masculinity in Dire Peril, and then in the confrontations he’s all alpha male swagger, while at the same time still kind of precious and dorky as he enjoys being sheriff, and have some serious tension with the phoenix totally different from bullying the skeevy deputy… who  _is_  he :P

* * *

Thank you Sam for showing up in the exact minute you were needed A+ time manipulation, Dabb & co.

On a scale of 1 to 10x22, this is probably their most blatant offence.

* * *

> BOBBY Well, we can’t just strand those idjits in Deadwood, can we? 

… I see you 

* * *

You know if Dean hadn’t messed around roleplaying cowboys he would have shot the guy like 20 seconds earlier and been able to get the ash himself

But nah, he was having too much fun

* * *

and now you FAAAILED

* * *

is this literally the same dialogue from Back to the Future?

Sam’s phone  _seriously_ needs charging

* * *

I can’t work out what I like more in the last scene: Dean’s fluffy hair,  “soulonoscopy”, or the way that Dean looks at Cas and then dramatically puts his cowboy hat back on for no reason except to look cool as the last second of the episode

probably testing to see if Cas has the same cowboy fetish, while he’s still all dressed up 

I think Cas approves of that costume rather more than the blanket anyway :P

(SHAME IT ALL WENT UP IN FLAMES)


	19. 6x19

Or: All these fandom jokes about Cas eating all the important artefacts and weapons, and no one remembers he learned it from his boyfriend??

* * *

Maybe it’s just perfect hindsight, but the recap of what happened to Crowley so far in season 6 does not seem particularly subtle about suggesting Crowley as a character might still be important, rather than just recapping what he did with the monsters, and subtly mentioning him and his death :P 

At least to this episode’s credit, there doesn’t seem to be any specific warning that Cas is going to ~turn evil~ at the end of this… It’s mostly focussed on taking the fight to Eve, so you could pretend all the way-too-much Crowley was just reminding us of the reason she might have started out angry…

At this point, if I were speculating season 6 as if I’d never seen it I’d be wondering if there was still some big conspiracy we don’t know about that centres on her: there was no real correlation between monsters being riled up and dragons summoning the Mother of All out of Purgatory and what Crowley was doing in the sense that he did not seem to be aware the monsters were out of whack but none of them blamed their patterns on him e.g. the random monsters out of their geographical location, the comments about werewolves doing stuff off the moon cycle. AND he was presumed dead 2 episodes before Eve showed up, meaning that connection is totally lost as we have no way to know she’s responding to continued aggravation. (And this thread had all been happening in isolation to the angel war stuff too)

It all seems bigger than what Crowley could have stirred up on his own suggesting that his interest in finding Purgatory and exploring how monsters worked could even have been him knowing Eve was on her way and investigating it for himself as defensive measures, like how in season 5 he was on their side against Lucifer. Crowley as the big bad is just as unprecedented as Cas here just because Crowley was a perfect reluctant ally trope-y villain in season 5, and so his characterisation was built around self-preservation, the evil you know, etc etc. So as a character while it might seem unsurprising he’d turn out to be an evil mastermind, he’s been coded as helpful and with motivations that work in their favour… technically him supporting Cas is still averting the same problem he teamed up with them on the first place, but the use of him as an antagonist is new. Anyway.

I think it mostly gets reconciled pretty well even if there’s a lot to suggest they didn’t know what was going to need to get tied together, but it’s still disappointing to me that Eve was not, for example, a greater problem that rolled over into season 7 if she was not going to get to command the end of this season… Instead she ends up very clearly just being a random symptom of Cas’s war, something that all just gets boxed off as collateral damage to it and fixed in time for bigger problems. The reveals that come out all make a lot of sense to glue the season back together and make the two seemingly unrelated threads whole, and I think  _somehow_  the end of season 6 *cough Edlund* pulls this all off… There’s plot holes, but all the melodrama is very distracting from them at least when you’re up this end of the season rather than floundering down in the terrible MotW :P

* * *

Eve goes and makes herself a room full of angry monsters. She looks pretty much the same as ever except she has a blood stain. Presumably she has not been made to bleed her own blood, so it’s a sign of past experiments. Considering she’s in a white nightgown with a bloodstain in her stomach area though, I think it’s a fairly safe call to say what that’s foreshadowing…

* * *

Cut to Dean apparently being really awesome at making shotgun shells until he admits he touched the stuff because he had a workplace accident, at which point the fact that phoenix ash is inert to humans and is safe to eat (??? WHY) is basically revealed through Dean being clumsy.

I mean, that’s how pretty much all great science happens, but it’s still funny

* * *

Cas shows up when called… or not, as the case may be

we know from next episode he likes lurking invisibly… we know from season 10 that he can sense longing and show up without being asked for… I think the implication here was that he just happened to show up to ask them about Eve right when they were reaching the point where they realised they didn’t know anything and wanted to ask HIM about Eve and his timing and placement were just really badly chosen :P

If we take that interpretation for a moment, ignoring jokes or more in depth reading, it does imply they’re more mutually working together on this… Ironically after a whole season of trying to get Cas to help them, he’s actually seemingly invested in helping them get Eve, probably because it’s clean-up from something he and Crowley started, but either way if he came before Dean could even ask, he’s finally being proactive and helpful and ATTEMPTING to work past that block that they built up… Sadly, Dean was over it last episode, but @mittensmorgul helpfully tracked the next few episodes for me here: <http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/140804334968/oh-gosh-reading-your-review-of-618-about-dean> 

… Which makes me think Cas is already doing a little lurking to make sure they’re not putting together too many puzzle pieces, and him asking immediately how they’re doing on Eve right when they call him for it is A: him knowing exactly what they were just talking about, and he jumped the gun without waiting for them to pray to him (probably because Dean’s prayers can be pretty ridiculous :P) and B: subtle obstruction because if he’s aware that Eve is repercussions for HIS mess, then keeping them away from her is priority to stop them finding out (as they do), so showing up immediately like “nah I have no idea” forces them to do all the hard work on finding her so at least it’s not his fault if they do find out

Although I do think it’s true he can’t find her, since she actually does turn out to be more powerful than him, which adds layers to his motives and deception and plausible deniability.

Like maybe he could work around it on his own, but he chooses not to

presumably they sent him off at the end of last episode asking him to go look for her

There’s also just the possibility he had an ears burning moment with them via the longing thing since Dean was thinking about Cas, and Cas didn’t want to give the impression of being unhelpful, so he came rushing down - I think he came last episode because he was aware of Rachel chewing them out, and he’s sort of working on his PR at the moment, if we take his actions at the end of 6x17 into account… Like I said in 6x18, it WORKED to make Dean enthusiastic to call him again - okay, Dean was excited about his own plan, but all the bitterness from earlier in the season was gone.

From Dean’s POV things were looking better with Cas at that point, but between the sudden hostility from Rachel reminding him that there’s the whole angel war if Cas won’t bitch about it himself to Cas being injured and reluctant at the end of last episode, clearly somewhere along the way Dean’s feelings about calling Cas have become more complicated again. 

It might also just be the build up to 6x20: we’ve had only a couple of reminders this season that Dean and Cas have a more profound bond (that line being one of them :P) and while a lot’s been shown about how they are fighting (showing a more dramatic emotional landscape between them) and how the emotional tether between Cas and the Winchesters is more about Dean just by weight of interactions, the hammer is going to fall and it lands on Dean first (as usual, he takes the emotional brunt of anything, Sam takes a different sort of bash from the whole wall being broken thing) so having a reminder that Dean is the one even the other characters associate with Cas doesn’t do any harm here… This straight up tells us that Bobby and Sam expect Dean to be the one who calls Cas and that to them it’s a normal thing that Cas is Dean’s angel and while they may like him a great deal, Dean leads the way when it comes to Cas… Dean I think maybe in that case senses the expectation from them and reacts in a hostile way just because he’s been through so much frustration with Cas this season that this accusation doesn’t even seem true to him, and he’s spent enough time being pissed off with Cas that even if he won’t entertain any thoughts that Cas is doing anything BAD past the point of disbelief, he can fully expect Cas not to come when he calls or that the supposition that Dean has the more direct line is wrong because to Dean he feels like he has spent a whole lot of time screaming down that line and not getting an answer…

I dunno. Just floating some tragic thoughts :P

* * *

… and that ALL is not even touching on how it’s the whole “lol gay” joke implying Cas was in Dean’s ass somehow. :P Once again, the surface reading is a kind of shitty joke, but provides not even a back door to walk through to get to the deeper readings still coming through this filter of jokingly implied romantic/sexual attraction…

… honestly sometimes I think 6x20 implies Cas is earnestly in love with Dean so much just to spite these kind of jokes :P Like, not like it would be considered canon off of that one episode, even it’s very emotionally compelling and converts large percentages of the shippers out there (hi), but after so many jokes it’s like “well why not? What if that were true?” and makes just a shade too plausible an argument so that you look back on these jokes and wonder if they were actually trying to tell us something…

(Well, probably not but that was my first time viewer experience of this season :P)

* * *

Bobby’s house!!

Impala!!

This looks like a fresh shot because they’ve had one exterior shot of Bobby’s house for like 2 whole seasons now. I’m glad to be not wrong about the boarded up windows, since it was a very blurry far away shot I’ve been relying on for two seasons…

* * *

Anyway Cas shows up with Lenore, who does a very undignified sort of upright roll away from conflict, which I think I may adopt as my signature move.

* * *

> LENORE: You’re crazy. I can’t help you.
> 
> SAM: Can’t or won’t?

More “can’t or won’t” …. I don’t think it’s been said SO many times this season it’s an overarching theme, but this feels like at least the third time. Maybe the phrase just got in their ear, or maybe it’s highlighting a theme… Seems to be something where the answer is always “won’t”, stressing characters hiding behind having no choice to do something that they did out of their free will and their own decisions… 

I’m sure that is not at all relevant to what happens with Cas. :P 

(I am a shade too headachey and bleh to recite the entire of 6x20 off the top of my head but I feel like that specific argument does come up…)

* * *

Cas smites Lenore because she asked nicely… His impatience has been a thing all season… At this point we should hardly be surprised, except that killing sympathetic vampires who we were really made to root for back in season 2 is still kind of rude. Still, on a scale of compromises Cas is making… >.> 

* * *

> DEAN: Yeah, well if she is here I’m glad we’ve got Smitey McSmiterton on our squad. 

Pfft

I suppose that line’s mostly there to highlight when Cas fails to be very useful until after Eve is dead, but I did notice Dean making a “well  _that_  happened” hand gesture over Lenore’s body or something like that :P She made her appeal to Sam for some reason even though from 2x03 it would have made more sense to assume Dean would still be the more bloodthirsty of them and less bothered about killing… Anyway, Dean expressed  _something_  over Cas just going ahead and killing her, but this is not judgemental for Cas being trigger happy :P He’s expressing conflicting messages about Cas being there and what Cas is doing moments apart >.> Or he kind of agreed with the mercy killing but didn’t want to be the one to do it… I suppose it’s no time for a crisis about monsters, although there was a montage of them all wandering around researching before Cas showed up with he so he could have been thinking about what good monsters they’ve even encountered

he’s got a ways to go yet… I did like that they unknowingly reminded us of Lenore’s friend in the recap without understanding that would be Dean’s vampire bestie in 2 years :P

* * *

I like how Eve walks past them, apparently was their waitress, and we get a tiny glimpse of her behind the bar

emphasised with Cas looking around so if you know it’s her, he really  _can’t_ sense her apparently

(ETA: She keeps walking past them every time they mention her this scene! AAAAH)

* * *

I know we talk about the baby in a trenchcoat thing but

> CAS: Something in this town, is, uh, it’s affecting me. I assume it’s Eve.
> 
> DEAN: So wait, Mom’s making you limp?
> 
> CAS: Figuratively, yes.

not so often I see it discussed how often Dean relates magical powers to sexual potency :P He was accusing the phoenix of not being able to get it up around iron just last episode. I know Cas liking to feel useful goes way beyond this but on the other hand he  _does_ like to make himself useful and impressively smite things in front of Dean or show off his wings… :P I saw the 9x06 conversation with Dean wheedling Cas to come investigate with him compared directly to the baby in a trenchcoat line just emphasising Dean’s actual opinion on Cas’s usefulness whether he has powers or not but HONESTLY give me Dean implying he doesn’t mind if Cas has power or not to find him sexy any day. :P 

* * *

I’ve often wondered if there was anything to say about the names of Dr Silver and Ed Bright, just because there seems to be a loose theme between them, but in context of this episode I can’t work out what it would be

* * *

And back out to the street! It’s bright and sunny and Dean’s hair has been weirdly more fluffy than normal for a couple of episodes, so I’m distracted gently stroking my screen :P

“painful burning sensation” does sound like Cas has been sneakily watching more trash TV somewhere or other. I don’t know much about American freaky medical adverts culture but that sounds like the sort of language they’d use. Dean shoots Cas a very weird look over it, perhaps wondering where he picked that up

little things like this make me think he has been lurking around them for longer than we’d think, even if it’s just to silently watch them watch TV. And STILL not get all their references, especially if he’s just watching the adverts.

(I mean he doesn’t actually sit down and learn the joys of actually watching long TV dramas until season 11… :P)

And of course I’m assuming “painful burning sensation” would be referring either to urinary infections or an STI of some sort, so MORE about Cas’s dick… Should probably remind that I was picking up this theme about him in Caged Heat - not just the obvious opposite to this, but there was also subtextually a sort of impotence metaphor about him, and that was when he was being deliberately unhelpful near the start… 

(Of course he gets to do some smiting at the end of this episode, and a ton of smiting next episode, but yeah I have no idea what I’m saying. It’s perpetually 1am when I’m typing these notes)

* * *

Once you’ve seen the gifset suggesting Cas was looking at Dean’s butt while he picked the lock you really can’t unsee it 

* * *

> DEAN: Well what kind of doctor calls the CDC and then stashes the gooey corpse in the shed?
> 
> CAS: I don’t understand what’s happening here.

Heh, I love Cas’s confused grumpiness at Dean asking all these rhetorical questions as he thinks out loud, and Cas thinks they’re for him. Communication isssues! \o/ Never a bad time for that theme to flare up…

* * *

hahaha Sam and Bobby steal an ancient gold car and then we see Cas and Dean have stolen a silver car. Silver and Bright?? :P

* * *

“You know who whines? Babies” … I feel like I promised to talk about Dean calling Cas a baby so much at this point since he’s really stressing the point. It really comes to a head with him calling Cas a child next episode over his philosophy as far as I recall, but since none of that is on the record between them yet, it’s clearly symptomatic of their other problems right now… Since it seems to be related to when Cas doesn’t have his powers and it becomes a point of tension, I suppose this goes back to Dean’s annoyance at having to call Cas: if it was him feeling emotionally jilted because of Cas’s terrible track record this season, then Cas not being able to offer even support in the form of using his powers means Dean is struggling with why he’s even there: if he feels like Cas won’t come when called, or won’t give them the friendship and emotional support, Cas pointing out he’s not got much experience with firearms just underlines to Dean how useless Cas seems to be right now. So, on with the impotence/Cas as a baby theme, which is really all coming from Dean’s perspective.

(Honestly we’re pretty much exactly a season down the line from all the stuff like “Blow me Cas,” and “last person who looked at me like that I got laid” - again lashing out at Cas & sexuality in anger, but with the opposite implication. Aka here is me making an argument for Dean’s ongoing discomfort with his own attraction to Cas, turned even more bitter and confused with the plot complications of this season, and so its context causes an opposite reaction of the means in which Dean lashes out, but from the same place.)

* * *

On the other hand:

> CAS: But why would she do this?
> 
> BOBBY: Mommy monster - make more.
> 
> DEAN: No, no, no, no. Cas has got a good point. I mean if she’s gonna make a shifter army, why make one that’s sick, gooey and dying?

I mean I’m being really dramatic with these notes especially with hindsight that Grim Betrayal is literally around the corner… Dean is still equal parts supportive as he is grumpy with Cas :P

* * *

Aaah the wonky El Sol sign in the background

YOUR REALITY IS FALSE

* * *

Sam’s resentful eyebrows about calling them Jefferson Starships though :’)

* * *

Sam having to yell “JEFFERSON STARSHIPS” to let them know that he’s just realised what’s going on

:’) :’) :’)

* * *

Listen: Dean showing up in the fight unannounced to save Cas from being chomped by a monster

Cas casually backhanded chopping a monster’s head off because he is that strong

Destiel monster murdering :’)

* * *

I like that they let Bobby lead the interrogation once they have the monster sheriff tied up.

> SHERIFF: (sighs) You’re so wasting your time. You stupid head of cattle. 

More references to humanity as livestock - I guess the writers were planting seeds in their own heads for wanting to do the Leviathan storyline, even if they didn’t realise it with this one

* * *

oh noooo caged halo lights over Dean. Right when they walk into the trap of the cute kids who were picked to be their weakness as their no.1 “must save innocent people” thing. Dean had caged halo lights earlier this season when no one else did, other times when he was beautifully and tragically suffering about stuff… They were more Cas’s thing in season 4 and I think Sam’s in season 5? Although they all get them depending on the situation.

This sort of makes it more Dean’s folly: it’s the younger brother who has something supernaturally wrong with him and he has a big brother looking after him, so the emotional focus is on emulating a situation Dean especially would fall especially hard for?

I think at this point the caged halo could be “hero complex” as much as “tragic attempts to do the right thing” :P

* * *

Oh NO I forgot about this conversation when Dean decides to take the boys home and Cas is lurking disapprovingly in the background…

He approaches Dean and asks him in particular for a word, and drags him away. He’s still SPLATTERED with monster blood from when Dean beheaded the monster that was going for him earlier… And I’m still not over Cas calmly waiting for that to happen, seeing Dean coming up behind the monster and trusting completely that Dean would handle it, not even flinching at all as the blood splashed him… 

Anyway, Cas is also covered in blood (metaphorically) as we’re going to find out soon… Things like him killing Rachel are just tiny steps along the way

And I think it’s symbolically awful that he has JS blood on him since this problem is all to do with HIM working for Crowley and the offence she takes at it, so the blood from this is literally ON him

ANYWAY

he comes over and asks for Dean, and leads him away from Sam as well as the little boys, to talk in private.

And then Cas is all impatient to find Eve and get this over and done with, perhaps not fully aware that this is a trap but definitely disliking that this is happening. As I was saying last episode about the angels thinking Cas has a Winchesters problem, Cas thinks the Winchesters have a “wayward orphan” problem (as he says to Bobby in a bit :P) 

When Dean tries to tell Cas to “hold his water” and get back to saving the kids (a “milk run” to him) Cas pulls Dean back with the softest “Dean… Dean!” ever like practically breaking into Misha voice…

> CAS: Dean, Dean. Millions of lives are at stakes here, not just two. Stay focused.
> 
> DEAN: Are you kidding?
> 
> CAS: There’s a greater purpose here.

Cas of course is busy doing all that he does this season for the sake of saving the planet (AGAIN) but there’s a trickle down sense of priority that I just laid out: it also highlights Cas putting the Winchesters (2 wayward orphans :P) first and of course he makes the choice in the end that he can’t afford to listen to them, that all those lives are at stake and there’s a greater purpose to becoming Godstiel. 

(I don’t even BLAME Cas for this decision at all, even if I love rolling around in the tragedy and sobbing hysterically about it all :P From where he was sitting it was a course of action that saved everyone, and this gives us a very simple insight into Cas here an episode in advance. The metaphor of these kids that were actually monsters is about as messed up as Cas breaking Sam’s wall or something, when they’re causing a threat to Cas’s attempt to win the war. It would have been AWFUL to chop off the little boy’s head then and there before he could kill his brother. I’m not saying it’s a direct parallel, but it shows the total mess of emotions going around in all this and how hard the decisions are?)

* * *

> DEAN: You know what, I-I’m getting a little sick and tired of the greater purposes, okay? I think what I’d like to do now is save a couple of kids. If you don’t mind. We’ll catch up. 

CONFLIIICT

Dean walking out the door looking back at CAAAAS

Cas grumpily refusing to look at DEEEAAAN

* * *

I know 6x20 really kickstarts the romance romance but I mean

* * *

* * *

Aaaah I clearly never reached it in my attempt to actually tag the back end of my blog but there’s an amazing meta out there and I’m pretty sure untagged on my blog about the Cas n Bobby conversation here, about Bobby just *getting* it about Cas… This is like the main Cas n Bobby moment until 10x17 or something I think :P

I mean they don’t exactly interact that often but it’s nice when they do. :P 

* * *

> BOBBY: They won’t take long.
> 
> CAS: You don’t know that. They may find more wayward orphans along the way.
> 
> BOBBY: Oh, don’t get cute.
> 
> CAS: Right. Pardon me for highlighting their crippling and dangerous empathetic response with “sarcasm”. It was a bad idea - letting them go.
> 
> BOBBY: Come on. You don’t let Sam and Dean Winchester do squat. They got what they gotta. You know that. Anyway, we want Eve, we need coordinates. So we can stand here bellyaching or we can go poke that pig ‘til he squeals. Thoughts?

The fact Cas vs wayward orphans literally is his main emotional subplot in season 10 kills me

(Somewhere out there right now Claire Novak is busy not doing her homework >.>)

This is good side character interaction, anyway - as much as Bobby and Sam know Dean n Cas are a thing, Bobby points out to Cas they have their own understanding of how Sam and Dean function as heroes to which they both should have a connection to each other of knowing how they’ll behave and being united in being ones who put up with that behaviour most often… :P I think Cas is aware that Sam and Dean having an obvious weakspot like this is the danger and he seems to know it’s a trap even if this is actually something he’s NOT responsible for for once this season :P 

When Bobby walks in on Cas moping in the corner looking out the window (prison imagery!) Cas’s voice actually cracks on his first line, and he seems to have been having a real moment of concern and fear and probably feeling everything slipping between his fingers before it actually did… I wonder how much he grimly predicted that this confrontation would be his undoing. He’s torn between impatience and inaction, and since Dean left, he’s resorted to inaction, I suppose because he’s only really putting in the effort when anyone’s watching him.

Not knowing all the subtleties of what’s on Cas’s mind, Bobby takes it wholly as concern, and offers Cas a distraction

* * *

UGH I want to hug Cas so much this end of the season :P

* * *

Do not want to know what Cas did to the sheriff to find out where Eve was.

Unless he did know all along and just killed the sheriff and thought it would be time to move things along and get this over with by fessing up.

WHO KNOWS

* * *

Bobby definitely seems really worried about what Cas did

* * *

Somehow just handing out shotgun shells Dean makes it into more of a production when giving one to Cas without saying anything

goes back to their earlier grumpiness with each other

I just like the two of them being SO DRAMATIC about everything, like I can imagine when they’re married, whoever doesn’t unload the dishwasher when they were supposed to is in for a world of hell from the other :P

* * *

Cas and Bobby get to exchange another look about the idea of Winchester heroics when Dean announces he and Sam will just walk right into the diner.

* * *

I wonder if the diner food was any good. 

Or if it would have turned them into monsters

* * *

> DEAN: No? Just to rally every freak on the planet, bring in Khan Worms and-and half-assed spider-men, and dragons. Really, sister? Dragons? 

SAME, DEAN. SAME.

Does it count as an improvement when the show starts dissing its own MotW?

* * *

> EVE: You misunderstand me. I never wanted that. Not at first. (Sam scoffs.) I liked our arrangement.
> 
> SAM: What arrangement?
> 
> EVE: The natural order. My children turned a few of you, you hunted a few of them. I was happy.

Again with the natural order! This makes Tessa standing up for life and death, Atropos standing up for fate, and Eve standing up for the apparent equilibrium of there always being some monsters, some hunters, and a whole lot of oblivious humans as prey/to be protected

* * *

I feel like I should be saying something about Mary but tbh at this point I’m worn out. :P Since she’s being used as a sympathy pull there’s very little critical thought put into her use except that it shows the amount of emotional manipulation Eve is willing to go to (and makes the little kids as bait not at all surprising)

* * *

> DEAN: He wants Purgatory, right? Location, location, location.
> 
> EVE: (laughs) Is that what he told you? It’s about the souls.

*Death looks into the camera*

* * *

Omg we don’t get Dean reaction shots for this revelation. He totally had a horrified “shouuuld have listened to Death” moment.

Sam just looks confused and alarmed, since he wasn’t warned.

You know

and I love these guys don’t get me wrong

I rather feel like Death and Eve put rather high expectations on them as the crux of the issue. I know they were hunting Eve but she could have just killed them, easy peasy. Death put an expectation on Dean he’d figure it out… Honestly it feels like the entire mytharc has come to them because the big players thought Sam and Dean should be involved

this is less of them discovering and getting involved actively (the theme of the season seems to be passive observing and things happening to them, highlighted several times in text, with other instances as examples) 

and more like just a great big Supernatural Popularity Contest, with Cas the guy sitting pretty on his friendship, and everyone else coming at the Winchesters with the main plot to try and entice them into engaging them, fighting them, idk, judging their monster pageant. Raphael fucked up by not taking a personal interest in the Winchesters - they weren’t important enough to even get a proper conversation with someone with ranks in a hero class in the end. Rookie error. :P

If we’re talking about them in context of Destiny and the end of the world as Atropos saw it, the fact is that Sam and Dean are big players on the board, and all these factions seem drawn to them just out of sheer curiosity or expectation. There’s a power void, but it’s not the obvious one… Sam and Dean dictate the way the story goes now, and THAT is the power that Eve or Crowley or Cas are struggling with. Why the angels are so alarmed about Cas spending time with them when it can and does upset their plans (see: 6x17) and Cas’s own struggle is with the Winchesters, who dictate fate, and the path he’s walking

You know, this actually makes me think that Cas COULD have pulled off saving the universe but not like that if he’d listened and done as Dean said, just because working together would change the power balance in the universe in the same way having all those souls would? When Dean says they will find a way to beat something, the universe shakes and a way opens up,  _because they’re the main characters_

this thought is too meta I’m going back to laughing at their faces

* * *

> DEAN: What?
> 
> EVE: Yes, you were the final test. I had to see if it could slip past hunters undetected, of course.

I mean that gives her a reason to have some well-trained hunters in town but not for monologue-ing everything at them :P Of course their connection to Crowley is known and I suppose she’s seen enough to know they could probably at least find and attempt to attack him again, based on their previous expertise in doing that, but I mean really, the way the plot is repeatedly delivered to them this season… 

* * *

> EVE: You look upset. If it makes you feel any better, Ryan was bound to work on you. Little wayward orphan, like yourselves. There’s nothing you can do about it now. So let’s talk. 

heh

everyone is saying “wayward orphan” today … Again Eve could have just picked that up listening through the Sheriff or something, or it’s showing Cas on a wavelength with villains or something idk

* * *

> EVE: Well, so much for your plan B. (to Cas) And you, wondering why so flaccid? I’m older than you, Castiel. 

Bonus reference to Cas’s dick for the road

* * *

Bobby on seeing Eve though is just like “oooh crap that’s Mary Winchester” and realising how much the boys are busy being emotionally scarred by this :P

* * *

> DEAN: Alright, look. The last few months we’ve been working for an evil dick. We’re not about to sign up for an evil bitch. We don’t work with demons. We don’t work with monsters. And if that means you gotta kill us, then kill us! 

Said in front of Cas who is, you know, busy working with an evil dick. :P Just casually stating their political viewpoints before it gets really really important…

* * *

Cas is the only one who yells “DEAN!” when Eve bites him

Anyway there are a ton of totally unnecessary closeups on Eve melting and Dean’s face, bouncing between the two of them. Not sure why SO much focus on Dean through the death I mean I guess he did kill her. It’s extremely weird. She spews black goo everywhere including from her hairline, which is directly paralleled with Leviathan!Cas melting in a few episodes.

I suppose maybe the special effects team had a “make black goo come out of your hair” thing set up and ready to go :P

* * *

Cas’s smiting sets off all the car alarms

but doesn’t smite Dean despite him also having been turned into a monster

like daaamn that was both a huge display of power and very gentle and carefully focussed :P

Dean has produced a black bandana from nowhere. I guess he keeps them in his pocket but there was really not a lot of time between her biting him and Cas’s smiting and looking at Dean again.

He really does keep bandanas because having a hanky is too girly. :P

* * *

Cas heals him with a grumpy pat on the shoulder. That’s probably his least affectionate healing.

* * *

Despite having his power back, Cas is still symbolically splattered in blood. He and Dean are sniping grumpily back and forth. Just like old times. :’)

… yeah I am pre-emptively nostalgic for THIS just because of how bad it’s going to get :P

* * *

> SAM: So you think she was telling the truth?
> 
> CAS: The truth about what?

This is the sound of my heart breaking

* * *

*Cas squints a lot*

* * *

I can not believe how many times I’ve watched season 6 and this still makes my heart beat fast with Dean’s fucking face here

> DEAN: What? What?
> 
> BOBBY: How  _did_  Crowley get away? I mean it’s not like Cas to make mistakes like that. Unless -
> 
> DEAN: Unless what?
> 
> BOBBY: Unless he meant to.
> 
> DEAN: Bobby, this is Cas we’re talking about. (to Sam) Do you believe this? (Sam doesn’t answer.) Sam?
> 
> SAM: (sighs) Look it’s probably nothing, it’s just… You know what? You’re right. It’s - it’s probably nothing.

And his VOICE cracking on that last “Sam?” 

Take a step back and look at how pissed off and fed up with Cas Dean was all episode and then come back and listen to his voice crack as he demands to know if they’re really thinking what he thinks they’re thinking

LOOK AT THE LINE DRAWN BETWEEN BOBBY AND SAM VS DEAN ON WHO IS WILLING TO BELIEVE THIS AND THEN LOOK AT THEM ASSUMING DEAN HAS SOMETHING ABOUT HIM AND CAS THAT MAKES HIM THE ONE TO CALL HIM.

Sam n Bobby knew the whole bloody time >.>

* * *

Ugh my heart is pounding 

Either I’m dying or that shot of Cas as Crowley is like “how many times am I going to have to clean up your messes” and Cas just squints more and more angrily affects me on a primal level. :P

* * *

*vivid flashes to 2011 me shakily leaping on the next episode - the  _last current episode that existed at that time_  - and sealing my own fate forever* 

Let me tell you my story… :P 

(I was under a duvet watching on my netbook on a screen the size of my hand, it was tragic. the end.)


	20. 6x20

This episode ruined me.

* * *

There’s not a lot of TV that leaves you feeling like when and how you first watched it is worthy of an anecdote just because you were so mauled by it :P This was there I ran out of new Supernatural to catch up after doing a full marathon of the show and watching everything from Lazarus Rising for the first time. Like, just stop for a minute and think about meeting Cas and within a week you’re here and that’s it that’s the show.

* * *

I can guarantee that Dean felt worse about it than me though.

* * *

Any episode with a recap that starts with Swan Song as some light background reading is up to no good.

* * *

Hnnngh okay I need to write notes okay okay

> The grand story. And we ripped up the ending and the rules…And destiny…leaving nothing but freedom and choice. Which is all well and good, except… Well, what if I’ve made the wrong choice? How am I supposed to know? 

This theme has been established across the season and at least more potently in 6x17 (it still counts if you only have 3 episodes to foreshadow it in although I won’t deny that The French Mistake gave this theme a very meta twist which fits in hindsight and of course is Edlund to Edlund :P) but of course we’re getting it out of Cas’s mouth now. I thought it was interesting that the recap had the bit from 5x22 where Dean was asking Cas “where next? – so you’re the new sheriff in town?” (shush yes this is the season that confirms he has a major fetish for cowboys) but not Cas challenging Dean about if he wanted peace or freedom.

the follow on from that in 5x22 was

> DEAN: Wow. God gives you a brand-new, shiny set of wings, and suddenly you’re his bitch again.   
>   
> CASTIEL: I don’t know what God wants. I don’t know if he’ll even return. It just… seems like the right thing to do. 

Considering that line from Cas everything gets somehow worse. This is him making the first of all these choices that led him there, and this monologue at the start of the episode is all addressed to God, so the fact that Cas also says he doesn’t know what God wants makes the fact he now resorts to a plea asking for this guidance is… terrible. This is all terrible.

Dean and Cas continue their arguing that leads to their season 6 rift, fighting over God and his involvement and what the ideal ending should have been. Dean is grieving Sam, and has taken a whole lot of emotional loss even if they’ve had an ideological victory. Cas, seeing it rather more simply as the victory it was in the grand scheme of things (which… is an important thing for this episode the he and Dean have these different world views and that Cas’s has so far been much less informed by personal loss and he’s been making these decisions without consideration of the emotional stakes too - to make a really, and probably easy to contradict with specific examples so shh, statement), he asks Dean if he would rather have had peace or freedom, extolling freedom and free will as the best thing in the universe, that beats out basically everything, even if it leads to this loss and suffering.

*fast forward noises* “…leaving nothing but freedom and choice. Which is all well and good, except…”

Cas has accidentally started suffering along with them all, and this episode comes down just to an emotional conflict, where Cas is forced to pick the worst path again for the sake of this impossible standard of freedom… Even if the way the world has been run all the time that God has been gone was that there was free will for its unwitting inhabitants, and the angels were free to choose to start the apocalypse or not in the first place, NOW the default status of the world as a free will world is under threat and is the more challenging option.

I think it’s also worth, before we dive in, mentioning that of the 4 archangels, Gabriel wanted it to stop because it was tearing the family apart, and so he was killed by said family. Michael and Lucifer wanted to fight their fight and it was personal between them as part of this universe’s core Sibling Strife model, and so they were sent to their ironic forever in the pit together. And Raphael, now the last one standing, just wanted it to be  _over_. Standing opposite Cas, from 5x03 we learn basically that he thinks God is dead and his influence is gone from the world entirely, and that Raphael wanted the apocalypse to happen entirely for that “peace” option and for the story to be over, so he and Cas have  _always_  been on pitched sides of peace vs freedom, making Raphael the perfect enemy to Cas

* * *

Anyway title card smashing is my heart breaking. It’s so multi-purpose! I love the season 6 title card! Find me another that does so much heavy lifting!

* * *

We take a LONG slow time to focus on Dean driving, like he’s blurrily coming into focus. This episode starting us with Dean and Cas talking in a car links us to 5x22 and that final conversation again, because for the Dean n Cas story, they have not got past that conversation in the car yet. I’m not kidding when I emphasise its importance as their break up, or that they are bitter exes for this season and it all goes back to that conversation. This skips us past all of season 6 and makes it so nothing matters between 5x22 and 6x20, for this, for the main plot… I mean, you could watch 6x01, 6x11, 6x20 and you’d be set. :P

(I should also mention as I don’t think I’ll get there for ages, that this opening is mimicked by 9x18 and I swear to god between Edlund and Thompson the two most life-shattering moments as a fan of this show have both been someone looking directly into the camera and threatening to tell me a story before cutting to Dean…)

* * *

“tracking a djinn in Omaha” < have you ever considered that the betrayal was foreshadowed with an El Sol aka the djinn drink aka El Sol signs are always portentous of false worlds, lies, and the story being wrong… And Omaha is the deep deep rift between Rufus and Bobby, referred onto to by that one name?

(now you have :P)

* * *

Cas spends this conversation staring very sadly at Dean when he isn’t looking.

* * *

> DEAN Yeah, no, I-I get it. No worries. But, Cas, you’ll call, right? If you get into real trouble? 

And here’s the do-over of 5x22: that same thing should have been extended there, but instead they went their separate ways for a year, and now it’s too late. Too too late. Cas is in real trouble and he has been basically since he first flapped off out of your car at the end of the apocalypse.

* * *

*Dean sniffing angrily*

* * *

> CASTIEL What is that good for?
> 
> CROWLEY Apart from the obvious erotic value, you got me.

Hello one of the other lines I will always laugh breathlessly at no matter how many times I find myself here

* * *

> CROWLEY And I’m confident that she could have if she was still alive! Single best chance to get over the rainbow, 

Oz refereeeeence. One of the gayest, considering it’s literally talking about rainbows :P 

Which of course takes us to:

> CASTIEL I am holding up my end.
> 
> CROWLEY Ah, yes. But is that all you’re holding? See…the stench of that Impala’s all over your overcoat, Angel. I thought we’d agreed - no more nights out with the boys.
> 
> CASTIEL I spoke with Dean. I needed to know what they know.

Things we really don’t talk about because it’s very subtle, but Cas (from a POV of the back of his head and shoulders) really draws himself up around about “Impala” and he’s probably defensively preparing himself to possibly be actually  _asked_  out loud with words about Dean and to what degree is he dangerously emotionally compromised by him, but it veers in a safely plot-ward direction for him to duck out.

And of course is still really just a direct accusation from Crowley that Cas is probably in love with/hooking up with Dean because I mean really what else is this except for the start of a love triangle that haunts me forever, although this time at least not directly implying Crowley’s involved with either of them, just that he is an obstacle between them and their relationship in turn is an obstacle to him, creating the same rough dynamic as a love triangle…

(I hate that that’s a “for now”)

* * *

btw

> CROWLEY You screwed up, Cas. You let the hounds mangle the pheasant, and now I am up to my elbows in it. 

More dog references for the Winchesters, rarely commented on as far as I remember in the discussions about this theme…. Crowley also calls them pets

* * *

Cas says in the narration in response to that (like talk about taking ages to come up with a clever reply) that he considers himself their guardian and I die a little because aaaaaah

* * *

exactly how many times has “hey assbutt” been said on the actual show not just in recaps and stuff? We’re up to 2 and we still have 10x05 and 11x10 to go

* * *

> CASTIEL  _Crowley had a point, of course. My interest was conflicted. I still considered myself the Winchesters’ guardian. After all…they taught me how to stand up…_ _What to stand for…And what generally happens to you when you do._
> 
> _I was…done. I was over. And then the most extraordinary thing happened. I was put back. (Castiel stands behind Dean, beaten bloody by Lucifer) And we had won. We stopped Armageddon. (Castiel heals Dean) But at a terrible cost. (Castiel heals Bobby)_

*pathetic Cas!girl noises* 

That “we had won” is said over Dean sitting there all bloody and gross and generally not looking like he thought they won, which, again, goes to the conflict between them being about more than just betrayal or who’s working for who, but this whole fault line over the end result.

Cas goes on to say the “at a terrible cost” line but only after that’s been presented to you. And then of course we move to the Souless!Sam stuff which…

> _And so I knew what I had to do next. Once again, I went to Harrow Hell, to free Sam from Lucifer’s cage. It was nearly impossible, but I was so full of confidence, of mission. I see now that was arrogance…Hubris…Because, of course, I hadn’t truly raised Sam – not all of him_

immediately gives us this next example of Cas’s mistakes and his understanding of the “terrible cost” leading directly to this, putting the blame for Sam’s resurrection entirely on Cas, and the error about no soul. (Since that was until just now supposedly Crowley’s work.) So he’s showing even when he’s aware of the emotional fallout, he only manages to contribute to more of the suffering with his choices he makes out of free will. He says he “had to do” it but of course he didn’t. He just wanted to and did, and then there were consequences.

(Incidentally this episode seems to flashback to literally every season 6 episode along with 5x22, and does such an excellent job weaving them together I feel like I am at a disadvantage to say anything meaningful about it because what’s presented on screen here becomes the only way to truly make any sense of season 6 but it’s all being explained so nicely… >.>)

Anyway. 

> _Sometimes we’re lucky enough to be given a warning. (back in front of Lisa’s house, Sam turns and walks away- directly past Castiel) This should have been mine._

This directly causes the fracture in 6x01 which means TFW don’t communicate for a year: Cas doesn’t reach out to Sam to find out what’s wrong or why he walked away. He doesn’t tell Dean he raised Sam, I suppose not after watching Sam walk away… The order to leave Dean with Lisa remains enforced, and in 6x01 I was saying that when Bobby, Sam and Dean were all in a room again, it had a confrontation with a vibe almost like this episode’s confrontation just because of the anger about lying and being excluded - like, Bobby knowing about Sam the whole time is the first of many small betrayals and lies that come to Dean over the season, but of course it’s traced back to that moment outside Lisa’s house, we just didn’t see where the pebble was dropped into the water to make the ripples until now?

* * *

> CROWLEY Don’t worry about – what, like Lucifer didn’t worry? Or Michael? Or Lilith or Alastair or Azazel didn’t worry?! Am I the only game piece on the board who doesn’t underestimate those denim-wrapped nightmares?! 

This quote gets funnier and funnier the more seasons pass :P I mean yeah Crowley is still alive, but…

Edit before posting: Pfffffftt of course this morning I wake up to this teased scene from somewhere ahead in season 11:

<http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/140905883358>

* * *

Anyway then after seeing Cas refusing to let anyone kill the Winchesters, and talking about how they taught him everything and recapping all their greatest moments and stuff, we cut to Bobby and Sam still hunting Crowley, and Dean coming in and absolutely refusing to doubt Cas.

> DEAN You know, he’s our friend…And we are lying to him through our teeth.
> 
> SAM Dean–
> 
> DEAN -so he burned the wrong bones. So Crowley tricked him.

Dean’s not liiistening. Denial is a great place to live.

* * *

Ugh the heart attack when the camera switches and shows Cas listening in, and you realise just how much this episode is a Cas POV episode…

Cas, of course, has the option to take away from this that they don’t trust him, or that Dean will defend Cas to the bitter end. I wonder what is more important to Cas in this scene :P

> SAM Look, Dean, he’s our friend, too, okay? 

mostly this line says a whole lot about how there’s friends and then there’s the realisation that Dean’ feelings for Cas are overwhelming in a way that sets them aside from Bobby or Sam and that he’s making a drama beyond the reasonable scope of Sam and Bobby’s version of the friendship. 

Although as I was saying last episode there wasn’t a whole lot to split Dean n Cas off from the others over this season, the emotional weight was between them and of course they easily had the most interaction, but this is the first time that it’s put to the test that there’s something more about them: it was teased a little last episode that Bobby and Sam are in a separate category when it comes to Cas, but just the way this episode splits Dean off from them utterly elevates the importance of this as not Team Free Will Betrayed From Within, but makes the focus on this side of the divide entirely on Dean’s feelings, and how Sam and Bobby deal with that, as much as how how they try to prove Cas’s guilt/innocence and find Crowley.

* * *

I like how the Superman line now kills me dead when the first part of it is said hahaha good to be prepared. We get some nice early use of the totally dead eyes from Dean in response to the warning they need to stock up on Kryptonite.

* * *

“This makes you Lois Lane” OH DEAN. Always with the lashing out when he’s threatened… In this case, projecting onto Sam, but he’s the one who brings up the love interest out of nowhere… As with 5x18 when he was lashing out at Cas there, he’s the one making it weird and pulling on that side of his relationship with Cas. 

(Projecting it onto Sam doesn’t just protect Dean from admitting he’s the love interest but also foists the betrayal off on Sam, as if Dean will somehow be less betrayed if he just swaps which Winchester is helplessly in love with Cas :P)

* * *

*Dean does the jaw thing while Cas is invisibly watching*

> CASTIEL  _So - they already suspected._
> 
> _And the worst part was Dean, trying so hard to be loyal, with every instinct telling him otherwise._

Yeah Cas’s priorities are totally borked too

* * *

idiots.

* * *

Demon!Bobby parallel is the best random character ever.

* * *

*two for one smiting*

Daaaamn Cas

* * *

> CASTIEL  _I had no choice. I did it to protect the boys. Or to protect myself. I-I don’t know anymore._

Remember how I was saying “can’t or won’t” was a random theme this season? This is coming back to the “no choice” thing… Of course every time Cas says that this episode it gets more and more ironic because he took this big stance for free will but feels or says he’s being backed further and further into a corner and he’s losing track of his OWN motives, ducking behind so many lies.

> CASTIEL  _Hiding…Lying…Sweeping away evidence. And my motives used to be so pure. After supposedly “saving” Sam, I finally returned to heaven._

(That line is from a minute or so later after the others find the house and Cas is still watching them investigate it… Seems fitting to pop it in at the end of that paragraph though)

* * *

Oh no angels clustering around Cas like lost ducklings. No no no. Don’t do it. Dooon’t do it

> RACHEL But you beat the Archangels, Castiel. God brought you back. He chose you, Cas…To lead us. 

…

* * *

(And again with 9x18 paralleling back to this episode, as this cluster with Rachel at the front is mirrored by Hannah and the other followers Cas called. HONESTLY it is a miracle Hannah died for stupid unrelated reasons and not got killed by Cas.)

* * *

> RACHEL It was God, wasn’t it?
> 
> CASTIEL No. It was the Winchesters. They brought down the Apocalypse.
> 
> …
> 
> RACHEL What does God want?
> 
> CASTIEL God wants you to have freedom.

While I’m on the subject, Metatron writing his story and borrowing from this moment to set Cas on his path wasn’t a bad choice because Metatron’s stupid contrived story was another attempt as “God” to make a meaning and direct the angels with a purpose… even if it was to write a new civil war between the angels, so not a GOOD purpose, we go from these angels directionless and Cas unable to answer them, to Metatron being the God that they were asking for here, guiding them to what Metatron was gleefully hoping would be destruction and his elevation as God. And of course by writing scripts and trying to control the story again, he’s directly taking away from that freedom that Cas interpreted as God’s only wish for them.

After all, if God brought Cas back but left no further directions, then Cas and his desire for freedom, and it being his philosophy he had been taught to fight for, then that must be tacit approval that this was the path God wanted the angels to go down?

(I still think that’s not a half-bad interpretation, just that the way Cas went about it and the unavoidable presence of Raphael, made it impossible in one short year, to play out the desired endgame for Heaven. And… to go back to mirroring Hannah and Rachel, it was Hannah who supposedly and admittedly very fleetingly, managed to restore  _any_  order in Heaven which had basically been lacking since… ever. :P)

* * *

> CASTIEL  _If I knew then what I know now…I might have said…“It’s simple. Freedom is a length of rope. God wants you to hang yourself with it.”_

Aaand bitter present day Cas, who has survived even past the confrontation with Dean, so has finally got 100% hindsight, has finally lost all illusions about the pure motivating drive of free will, contrasting this dialogue with his simple, optimistic message to the angels with Crushing Despair from later. 

* * *

> RAPHAEL Tomorrow - I’ve called for a full assembly of the Holy Host. You’ll kneel before me and pledge allegiance to the flag, all right? 

I have to wonder if he thought Cas would actually do it or if Raphael was always hoping Cas would rebel again - just didn’t think that Cas would put up SUCH a fight and be SO resourceful to keep himself alive for a year and then actually WIN the damn war.

He’d probably have liked Cas to say yes here, rebel in front of everyone, get symbolically smote in front of everyone, and that be the end of that and no more lessons about poetry to the fish. :P

* * *

> CASTIEL Raphael…No. The Apocalypse doesn’t have to be fought!
> 
> RAPHAEL Of course it does. It’s God’s will.
> 
> CASTIEL How can you say that?!

And again setting the up as dead opposites on this: Cas is returned to life supposedly by God, and guesses from that a suggestion of what God might want if he’s rewarding Cas for his fight. Raphael meanwhile is making interpretations of God’s will too, and coming up with the option of no free will, not just for the angels, but bringing about Judgement Day for humanity too. Both of them guessing about God and what they are supposed to be doing now the story is over… Or in Raphael’s case, he’s assuming if the story hasn’t ended, he has to drag the story back out and try again, because if Judgement Day is the final page and it hasn’t happened yet, you just make another attempt to get to the ending. 

(In a way honestly that’s a metaphor which is not lost on me that I’m typing this the night season 12 was announced, meaning this story is now twice the length it was here :P)

BUT THEN:

> RAPHAEL Because it’s what I want. 

Can’t or won’t? In this case, Can and will. Raphael betrays himself to be enjoying the perks of free will as much as the next angel. Having made the interpretation he wanted, he can now fight for subjugation and in terms of the power struggle of it all being about souls, if he wins he gets the entire planet - just like Eve was going to snatch it from all of them by trying to get every soul first.

And of course his actions then put Cas in the place where because Raphael is exercising free will, Cas begins to go down the path of feeling he has no choice, narrowing him into more and more terrible decisions

* * *

(It’s belatedly after 5 years occurred to me that Balthazar isn’t in this episode. Whoops. :P I’ll give Edlund some serious credit for never making me realise that.)

* * *

I love how every scene change has a very high risk of Cas just  _looking_  at Dean 

* * *

> SAM Yeah. So what now?
> 
> DEAN We’d call Cas.
> 
> SAM What?
> 
> DEAN This is usually the point where we would call Cas for help.
> 
> BOBBY We talked about this.
> 
> SAM Yeah, Dean.
> 
> DEAN No, you talked. I listened. This is Cas, guys. I mean, when there was no one…And we were stuck - and I mean really stuck - he broke ranks. He has gone to the mat cut and bleeding for us so many freakin’ times. This is Cas! Don’t we owe him the benefit of the doubt at least?

*whiiines*

Literally how does anyone make it through this episode and not think about how much Dean and Cas are stupidly in love with each other?

* * *

Cas hears that and DOESN’T answer the prayer

* * *

Cas hears  _THAT_  and doesn’t answer the prayer

* * *

> CASTIEL  _But I didn’t go to them…Because I knew they would have questions I couldn’t answer…Because I was afraid._
> 
> DEAN Cas is busy.
> 
> SAM That’s all right. We are, too. Come on.

I can’t handle Sam being all sad and reassuring to Dean like omg how fragile is he that Sam is saying thiiissss??

* * *

At this point I’m aware I’m quoting pretty much all the narration but shush it’s important

> CASTIEL  _Crowley sent his very best. I was caught as much by surprise as the rest of them. And it left me with yet another choice. I could reveal myself and smite the demons. Of course Crowley wouldn’t like it. But on the other hand, they were my friends. For a brief moment…I was me again._

I was saying about Dean equating Cas’s smitey powers and sexual competency last episode… Here we see him smite the demons (demons that Crowley has probably actually been SUFFERING without considering the kind of moronic cronies he’s had since tbhif Cas describes them as the very best :P) … And Cas does the big show in front of them and equates it to being himself. 

That emphasis on “yet another choice” goes basically across the whole season - really Cas’s whole history and character and everything he ever does is making choices for better or worse consequences, in a way where him making choices is the focus of him doing stuff in a way it isn’t always the crux of the issue with the Winchesters and their arcs - but yeah the context is all season he’s been deciding when to come help them, deciding when to reveal himself… Right now the main choice that’s been shown is him blowing the Souless!Sam thing, and up next I think is us seeing the Crowley thing (how many bad decisions does he even have to make this episode??) so there’s an extremely low bar for what could go wrong for one of Cas’s choices here… 

Interesting that this one, where he does the good thing and not let his friends get murdered, he phrases it as a choice, while, perhaps just to make it easier to make the bad decisions, the things where it’s REALLY bad he sells it as having no choice to do the thing.

(I mean obviously he’s probably actually got LESS choice about saving his friends than not, but it’s how Cas is rationalising stuff to himself, while here he has the luxury of allowing himself that this was a choice and there were worse options he could have taken that would have TRULY furthered his descent, but he didn’t. Selling the lie of the good Cas even to himself)

* * *

“It’ good to see you, Cas” *Dean looks Cas up and down twice*

*then once more for luck*

* * *

Ugh, it ends up with Cas standing in the foreground, Dean close by, and Bobby and Sam off at a far remove as they have this conversation, sort of visually demonstrating the level of trust in Cas going around >.>

* * *

Oh no

oooh no

_wonders never cease… this breaks my heart again_

* * *

I hate where you actually see Dean’s heart break as well. Like, that moment. Right there. *season 6 title card smashing glass sounds*

Byeee.

* * *

*Cas flinging open double doors before he even reaches them*

this cheers me up

* * *

“I’m fine”

yeah Crowley is not the one to believe that

> CROWLEY Yeah. You’re the very picture of mental health. Come on. You don’t think I know what this is all about?
> 
> CASTIEL Enlighten me.
> 
> CROWLEY The big lie – the Winchesters still buy it. The good Cas, the righteous Cas. And long as they still believe it, you get to believe it.

He’s pretty good at analysing Cas. Saves me the trouble. 

(Aaaah “righteous” I think that word only got applied to Dean like once or twice in 4x16 (hi Edlund!) and now it’s been slapped on Cas)

* * *

Cas demonstrates how he can slam someone so hard into a wall it breaks like the cheap set it is, and I can’t remember why I felt that needed pointing out

* * *

:3

* * *

Aw shit the gifsets don’t mention the very slight slow music when Cas is watching Dean rake leaves

it stops when Crowley shows up

that was their raking leaves music

* * *

> CROWLEY I’m talking about Raphael’s head on a pike. I’m talking about happy endings for all of us, with all possible entendres intended. 

*Cas glances back at Dean 100 times*

*makes a foolish decision*

…

* * *

> CROWLEY But just look at them. No one likes waiting in line.
> 
> CASTIEL And what happens when they reach the front?

This from the angel who got very philosophical about monsters dying in monster heaven… Maybe it’s a more obvious question but I like to think Cas has all sorts of weird 3am questions

she types at 3am

* * *

> CROWLEY Ah, not on your own, you’re not. But you’re not on your own, are you? There’s a lot of angels swooning over you. “God’s favorite.” 

Hello season 11 my old friend

(it’s too 3am for this I feel the need to confirm I said that because the similar comment about God’s favouritism was said by the Darkness :P)

> CASTIEL You’re asking me to be the next Lucifer.
> 
> CROWLEY Please. Lucifer was a petulant child with daddy issues. Cas, you love God. God loves you. He brought you back. Did it occur to you that maybe he did this so you could be the new sheriff upstairs?

uhoh no Dean said “sheriff” and Cas liked it then. He goes from debating if he should do it to arguing just the logistics of not having enough power to do it >.>

Also, while we’re staring down season 11, we have a canon vs fanon debate on Lucifer characterisation from an angel vs a demon :P Relevant to the discussion about season 11 Lucifer’s behaviour anyway… I’m not sure either of them are totally right, but the angels are much more likely to have a warped sense of who Lucifer is just from propaganda not to go rebel and be like Lucifer.

* * *

> CROWLEY From experts, of course. I know of two eerily suited ‘Teen Beat’ models with time on their hands.
> 
> CASTIEL No. Not Dean. He’s retired, and he’s to stay that way.

:’)

I do wonder what Soulless Sam did in these apparent “weeks” - maybe went to visit Bobby on muscle memory… Probably got bored and started asking for jobs to do rather than sitting around chatting :P

* * *

> CROWLEY My position isn’t all that stable, ducky. Those souls would help, just like they’d help you. Besides, wouldn’t you rather have me in charge down here? The devil you know… 

And I have been waiting since May 2011 for anything to come of that :P (Okay so Abaddon got close, but really, no one  _actually_  toppled him until Lucifer was back, which I suppose is impressive all by itself but still I mean I started off whining that Meg never was shown in a fair fight with him… Crowley’s position seemed constantly ready to be toppled from within and it never happened, not in demon vs demon fights… I suppose after this they may not have wanted to drag us through an off-screen civil war, but just quietly deposing Crowley between seasons and dumping him on the side of the road by like season 8 would have probably led to some very interesting characterisation we missed out on…. :P)

* * *

> CROWLEY Everything you’ve worked for – everything that Sam and Dean have worked for – gone. You can save us, Castiel. God chose you to save us. And I think…Deep down…You know that. 

*Crowley pulls on those same strings that Rachel was pulling on*

Aaand we’re ready for a pride fall at last :P

* * *

I think it’s so mean that they made Dean do the prayer to draw Cas to them.

…

Bonus: Dean staying in his chair while Sam steps confrontationally in front of Cas and Bobby drops the matches on the oil from behind, and the last shot before the break is Dean’s horrified face

* * *

Why do I ship something so awful that the most emotional moment of their whole relationship is Dean’s voice breaking as he demands Cas look him in the eye and tell him he’s not working for Crowley?

Again, Bobby and Sam lead the interrogation with shooting extra info about dodgy stuff they’ve noticed at Cas, but it’s Dean who gets the confession out of Cas by appealing emotionally, and just asking for a straight answer if Cas can give it.

* * *

> SAM Trust you?! How in the hell are we supposed to trust you now?
> 
> CASTIEL I’m still me. I’m still your friend. Sam…I’m the one who raised you from Perdition.

That line… honestly… makes me feel so sick. We get a reaction shot of Dean, Bobby AND Sam all feeling the same about it :P Like, it’s not even that it’s a perversion of the classic line delivered to Dean, it’s just Cas’s desperation trading in on what was a really good thing with Dean (hey! No one had to make demon deals! Dean is back without a scratch! Yay!) using that same language to describe what he did for Sam, but that only raises the horror levels in the room because of the soulless thing and actually makes them wonder for a moment. It’s, like, the  _worst_  thing to say to prove they can still trust him after everything they went through with soulless!Sam… 

* * *

> CASTIEL Listen. Raphael will kill us all. He’ll turn the world into a graveyard. I had no choice.
> 
> DEAN No, you had a choice. You just made the wrong one.

Choooice

I still wonder if they could have pulled it off… I mean Cas DOES, by himself, and I was musing on if their main character-ness would have let them pull through… but if we look at this through the lens that many characters have wondered about the will of God in all this… Say Cas was resurrected by God and had his support for the whole “don’t let the apocalypse happen again” thing… an in-universe reason that things must have happened in Cas’s favour necessarily, and the free will side of it just comes from the decisions he makes to achieve it: many possible paths laid out where he would have won, but all these ways to do it wrong because ultimately if he didn’t learn from freedom of choice, what even would be the point?

And then comes the suffering because I bet there were no/few good paths to take, and Cas went for a maximum difficulty level version…

* * *

*currently incapacitated by “where were you?”*

Of course that’s their communication theme for the season neatly wrapped up: Cas not answering, Cas choosing several times not to approach Dean for help, and Dean within a few episodes beginning to feel miserable and hostile about Cas not answering when he needs him while Cas avoids him over the Souless!Sam problem out of guilt and helplessness…

my only question is: was the random extra flashback to raking leaves and Crowley smirking as he leads Cas away  _really_  necessary, Edlund?

* * *

Or Dean actually now ready to cry on “you should have come to us for help”

> DEAN It’s not too late. Damn it, Cas! We can fix this!
> 
> CASTIEL Dean, it’s not broken!

Aaand although at this point I kind of doubt there was any other way, and Cas was actually right at this point, if only because deadlines and looming end of the world no one else appreciated, this shows all sorts of terrible things like Dean reaching out to Cas ONE MORE TIME believing MAYBE they can make it work and even after hearing EVERYTHING that Cas has done and levelling most of the accusations at Cas himself, he will still offer Cas a chance to come back and make it right and for it to all be forgiven

And Cas still convinced he’s right unable to come back down and accept that… I think long past the point of pride and into desperation, but a repeat of the raking leaves moment nonetheless that Dean offers to be there and for this to be a second go at a moment Cas needed to hear it, only Cas has to decline it for those different, worse reasons. >.>

* * *

Apparently I will still desperately reach for the screen as Dean n Cas stare at each other in that last moment before Dean leaves the room…

* * *

Crowley’s amusement at seeing Cas in the circle though.

> CROWLEY Besides, I think they’ve proven my point for me. It’s always your friends, isn’t it, in the end? 

Crowley no >.>

I think Cas actually scares him here. :P

> CROWLEY I know what I am. What are you, Castiel? What exactly are you willing to do? 

Is that the first time anyone directly asks Cas what he is?

* * *

OH NO Dean is sleeping on the Sofa of Tragedy.

*I say like I have never seen this episode in my life*

He wakes up abruptly, reminding us a bit of 4x02, when Cas first dropped into Bobby’s house.

I think this is the last time? 

(Of course he comes to the yard another time next episode, which is a whole other kettle of fish, with them on the same ground as their 4x21 conversation… But it gets burned down pretty quickly after this… I don’t think Cas drops in on Dean when he’s sleeping until season 8… aaaaaah)

* * *

This final conversation here though is the worst because it’s not like the confrontation in the holy fire was not already heavily Dean/Cas slanted, but here there’s, like, follow up emotional drama for more private times…

> DEAN Oh, believe me, I get it. Blah, blah, Raphael, right?
> 
> CASTIEL I’m doing this for you, Dean. I’m doing this because of you.

it is honestly amazing we are 37 minutes in and this episode is not done flaying my soul

I mean, if nothing else, to wander back to happier times, I was saying 9x18 ripped off this episode,  but the end of season 9 is structured in the same way: the confrontation in 9x22 in front of everyone where it’s made about Dean but like, bare minimum plausible deniability about it covering both Winchesters since Sam’s in the room and Metatron acknowledges his existence, and then goes off and says later about Cas, “he’s in love….” and leaves us hanging for an entire episode until in 9x23 he drops the line to Cas about doing it all to save Dean Winchester. I mean, this is all packed into one episode here, but it’s the same basic thing of having the follow up that makes it twice as personal, even invalidating everything said before as Cas doesn’t fall behind the Raphael thing but tells Dean the real emotional drive behind what he did (AND SADLY this is as close as we get to “I watched you rake leaves” because that was the opportune moment…)

> CASTIEL You’re the one who taught me that freedom and free will –
> 
> DEAN You’re a freakin’ child, you know that? Just because you can do what you want doesn’t mean that you get to do whatever you want!
> 
> CASTIEL I know what I’m doing, Dean.

Aaaand if the peace or freedom conversation haunted them all season as a growing crack line, I think they just snapped apart >.> Cas’s understanding of it comes across as too simplistic for Dean, and rather than them having educated each other over time, they’ve sat too long apart, Cas not learning from Dean as he did in previous seasons (which is where the issue of Dean seeing Cas as a child over this relates, with the lack of personal growth together leaving Cas emotionally more immature than he could have been). Cas has become disillusioned with free will on his own, and feels forced enough to keep on saying he has no choice but to keep on making bad choices, and Dean was never happy that he didn’t get a perfect happy ending - he nearly gave in and said yes to Michael to GET that happy blissful ending, and Cas pulled him violently back from it in 5x18. They kept overlapping in agreeing that the world needed saving, but Dean emotionally was drawn to the “peace” option even if he’d fight for the other, and Cas struggled the entire time to make free will work… Basically, it’s a disaster as much as a tragedy :P Instead of meeting in the middle they just get drawn further apart down different lines, but because of the drift they take, you could almost imagine a world where they did meet in the middle and find a way to sort it out?

> CASTIEL I know what I’m doing, Dean.
> 
> DEAN I’m not gonna logic you, okay? I’m saying don’t…Just 'cause. I’m asking you not to. That’s it.
> 
> CASTIEL I don’t understand.

Dean reveals that basically everything he bases decisions on is sketchy emotional feelings :P

Well okay it’s probably more complex than that but that was his emotional plea and trying to make Cas SEE that he was making an emotional plea, but NOW we get into the next step of their endless lack of reconciliation for the next season - they need to come to an emotional understanding and it’s going to take until like the last quarter of freakin’ 7x23 for that. So for now, they’ve been reduced to a sort of zero understanding - that Cas was never meant to come back from at all. Dean plays the family card and Cas doesn’t pick it up, not understanding how this request can possibly trump everything because it’s deep beyond trying to sort the world and decisions out by free will or not as he has been doing. He’s been making the decisions on “will this save the world or not” levels, while Dean has spent all season struggling around on deep emotional storylines, and their true cross purposes are sort of revealed here?

(HONESTLY for something that was never meant to be a love story… That they then fight their way back to emotional understanding over many seasons is just… Argh. :P)

* * *

> So, that’s everything. I believe it’s what you would call a…Tragedy from the human perspective. But maybe the human perspective is…Limited. I don’t know. 

You don’t know because that’s your next mission to figure it out. :P (THAT might take until after actually being human again, tbh… Let’s just take his complaining about wayward orphans in 6x19 as the baseline and then look at whereabouts in his life he realises he needs to go help Claire? I don’t even know)

* * *

> That’s why I’m asking you, Father. One last time. Am I doing the right thing? Am I on the right path? You have to tell me. You have to give me…A sign. Give me a sign. Because if you don’t…I’m gonna ju– I’m gonna do whatever I… Whatever I must. 

If you have been reading these rewatches from the start you’ll remember me yelling incoherently about Dean in 2x20 talking to John’s grave about why do they have to save everyone, and then Jimmy yelling at Cas (haha about protecting his family & Claire) in 4x20, and that’s because implausibly every even-numbered 20th episode beforehand apparently had a dramatic appeal to a higher power cut the same way as this most memorable example, with the desperation and run-on sentences conveyed with overlapping with the camera angles so he’s talking over himself.

I have no idea wtf is up with that except pure coincidence but I like the synergy (dammit Crowley I’m going to have that word stuck in my head now!)

* * *

Anyway, Cas waits for God to make his hard choices for him, and then, crushed under the pressure of Free Will, bows his head in despair and that’s about all I can take so I’m glad the episode ends there. :P


	21. 6x21

Ah yes, apparently the world keeps on turning after horrific betrayal… mostly because it needs to find ways to make things worse

* * *

I feel like I might reveal too much about my home environment growing up here, but one of my most vivid childhood memories is of defacing an unwanted bust of HP Lovecraft we had, with poster paints and my brother’s help. 

I am not inclined to take him very seriously.

* * *

That said, setting aside my personal reservations about this plot/the man himself, I am interested in them introducing him via typing on a typewriter… Of course the whole thing this season - it’s meta conflict as well - is what to do when the story has ended, something that was literally shown as typing on a screen. They’re going to try and tie the show’s monster mythos to HPL here, and season 7 is the ‘weird eldrich horror monsters’ season, so this is a pretty good nod to picking *a* story to follow… HPL may not be a god or anything dictating the story, but in the meta narrative, he’s here metaphorically showing this attempted change of path…

I do tend to think of the episodes between 6x21-7x02 as their own mini season, treating 6x20 as the stop of one story, and the start of a new one is here, but then 7x02 is the end point for the Cas/Godstiel arc and the real end of any apocalypse-related plot damage off the board at last since season 1… 7x17 takes Sam’s hell visions from him and by the end of season 7 we wrap with ALL the old plot threads off the board, and the new ones introduced along the way like this one gone too, for the total fresh start in season 8. 

I don’t know, the storytelling is something I’ve always found choppy and weird here in the way that other later seasons with their “wrap up the main problem in 1-3 episodes and move on to the next drama” approach still don’t REALLY approach in the same way as the decision to kill Cas off affects season 7?

* * *

We start the main action on Dean looking miserable and angsting about Cas and his life choices

I feel too old for this :P

* * *

> SAM: Well, you know what, at least you tried.
> 
> DEAN: Yeah, fat lot of good it did. Why did he even come, right?
> 
> [….]
> 
> BOBBY: Well, that’s the bad news. Our pal Cas didn’t stop in last night just to mend fences.
> 
> DEAN: What did he do?
> 
> BOBBY: Stole something.

Awww no, Cas is in rampage mode.

I find it pretty funny that it further makes Cas’s visit pretty much just a brief interlude for a confession of love but also if I had any heart left it would be breaking over it further being proved to Dean that Cas doesn’t care and has just been using them blah blah this is terrible

* * *

> DEAN: Am I supposed to know who that is?
> 
> BOBBY: (surprised that Dean doesn’t know) Horror writer. At the Mountains Of Madness, The Call of Cthulu?
> 
> DEAN: Yeah, it’s - no, I’m - I was too busy having sex with women.

*rolls eyes at him*

this is still a bit confusingly acted like Dean is deflecting but if so it’s a buried trauma. Maybe he read HP Lovecraft when he was smol and made himself scared and decided to never read him again because he didn’t have time for being afraid of monsters… >.> Whatever it is, it seems sort of genuine he doesn’t know at first, but then he gets over-defensive.

He’s in a pretty terrible headspace right now seeing as how his boyfriend just broke up with him, so I’ll let it slide >.>

* * *

Anyway then Crowley kidnaps Ben and Lisa and makes flirtatious comments down the phone to Dean. (Oh no.) 

This coming so soon after Cas’s betrayal we get like 2 minutes of raw Destiel angst before Dean’s upset about his other found family on top of that…

> SAM: (sighs) You think Cas knows about this?
> 
> DEAN: We gotta assume he does.

Baaah  I hate the blame Cas for everything times.

I mean that’s an assumption they have to make because they can’t afford to be forgiving in an ongoing crisis when the episode literally started with them discovering Cas being sneaky, but it’s tragic :(

* * *

I can’t believe Dean and Sam do angel summonings on the hood of an old car

like that’s kind of the whole Supernatural aesthetic in one go?

* * *

Balthazar reveals accidentally he’s just been as betrayed as them, and does not get the whole 6x20 treatment. They left you out, mate. Your time for meaningful angst is gone - now you just get mocking Sam snark about it

guess he hasn’t forgiven him for telling him to kill Bobby

* * *

> DEAN: Because maybe there is a shred of decency underneath this - this snarky crap. 

aw no, I don’t even feel like getting into Dean saying something about this when he’s all snarky crap sometimes :P

* * *

> SAM: Look, Dean. Let’s just call Cas. Maybe he doesn’t know anything about this.
> 
> DEAN: We are not calling Cas.
> 
> SAM: Yeah, but Dean.
> 
> DEAN: We’re not calling Cas!

The trauma about calling Cas for stuff is still waaay too fresh. Of course after Dean was the one who was extending a final chance to Cas last episode before he blew it, Sam now has to go into opposition to Dean as the more forgiving one just because then Dean can harp tragically on it and Sam, who didn’t get quite so emotionally eviscerated last episode, can begin his healing process over this.

(Of course it’s calling Cas to save a former love interest, so this episode continues trying to poorly paper over the whole Destiel bombshell :P)

* * *

> JUDAH: Yeah, uh, you know, trenchcoat, looks like Columbo, talks like Rain Man.
> 
> BOBBY: Right. We’re… competitors.Rival magazines.

:( Don’t think I’m not sparing some time to be sad about Bobby wearing a tan raincoat to sell the cover, and this being a terrible day for Cas n Bobby as friends too

* * *

> JUDAH: Not much. Just open a door into another dimension.
> 
> BOBBY: Why would they do that?
> 
> JUDAH: To see what’s out there, you know. Maybe it’s friendly.
> 
> BOBBY: It’s never friendly. (Judah gives him a look.) I mean, I imagine.

Oh Bobby. I’m already starting to miss you because for some reason in my head this is season 7 :P

* * *

Dean in his alcoholism and murder spiral of the year

> DEAN: Sam, back off. Lisa and Ben, wherever they are, that is a hundred percent on me. And if they are hurt… 

Of course even if Cas is a mitigating factor, this is what he’s allowed to be upset and angry about and vent his hurt on killing demons… Not like he was in a good mood to start this episode, but his personal drama has been redirected a bit? The Cas thing is a PART of this drama, but the sense of fear and loss has moved to a fresher location >.>

* * *

> SAM: Castiel, it’s Sam. Um, so look, I don’t know if you’re in on this whole Ben-Lisa thing, but if you have any heart whatsoever, bring ‘em back to us, man. C'mon. Please. I’m begging you. I am begging you, do you understand? (Sam looks around. Nothing. He scoffs. As he walks away, Castiel is standing next to him, unseen.) 

Sam starts his whole praying to Cas when Dean won’t thing. :( :( 

Like, this episode is still intrinsically laced with Destiel angst just that it’s buried deeper… I think this feeling is just whiplash after 6x20 :P

* * *

Everything continues unravelling for Cas: Crowley seems less scared of him and making more demands, and we go immediately from that to Balthazar calling Cas up for a chat

I always liked that they met in the woods just because it’s nice and tranquil

contrasting sharply from the lab Crowley was in too. 

Balthazar has also been working with Cas but Cas has kept him separate from the Crowley thing, and now he gets his chance to confront Cas

Cas, clinging to any shred of control or respect from his friends left, immediately tries denying that he works with Crowley but Balthy sees right through him.

There’s a river in the background. And they’re talking about Purgatory 

I am very sad

* * *

> WESTBOROUGH: You sure you’re not with that other reporter, in the coat? Liar, that one. Not who he says.
> 
> BOBBY: No sir. Uh, I’m not affiliated with his paper

I hate how every time I say that something happens to make me feel sadder :P 

* * *

Anyway the WORST part is Bobby getting a win over Cas just for showing some human kindness and empathy about the situation (admittedly over also all the other people who apparently have come asking this guy about HPL but it does draw the contrast between our two characters as well). I guess since I diagnosed Cas’s new struggle as not “peace vs freedom” but now finally in the “angel vs human” stretch of his arc from the last conversation in 6x20 onwards, and how that establishes him as a flat 0 on the scale, it’s no surprise this theme is picking up here with an error like this from Cas.

I dislike it here but obviously once Cas is restored to the show they pick up and carry on this as an arc so what was underlining a trait to make him Other and villainous at this last part of Cas’s first go at things ends up being what gets built on later…

* * *

Meanwhile Dean is making errors because he’s tired, and drunk and taking “whatever”… Reminds me of Kayanem’s comment on Dean making the shells of phoenix ash and slipping up there - it was shown he was drinking while doing that too… If that was him operating on his usual amount of everyday despair and depression… here it really does nearly cost him his life

* * *

Cas always saving Dean :’) No idea if he was lurking or just keeps a permanent eye on Dean or just had something to tell him & good timing… A LOT of ambiguity before and after the betrayal about Cas’s motives for showing up around Dean.

* * *

I also appreciate how this over runs past the 21 minute mark instead of the show’s nearly impeccable usual timing with the ad break 20 minutes in because it was very important that the dramatic cliffhanger was Dean and Cas in front of each other again

* * *

Ugh, Dean’s shattered faith in Cas. He’s laughing to cover the pain as he says “i don’t believe a word that’s coming out of your mouth”

> CASTIEL: I thought you said that we were like family. Well I think that too. Shouldn’t trust run both ways?
> 
> DEAN: Cas, I just can’t…

:( :(

You guys missed your chance for good healthy communication like before the season even started. Like, this tragedy existed at the end of the LAST season there is no way they can reconcile it here. >.> Now everything Cas says looks like back-pedalling and lying, even when it isn’t. 

I feel like the “I always come when you call” thing is also something taken out of context in fandom with the gifset paralleling it to “you think I came because you called” from 6x03, as it’s tainted in exactly the same way as Cas telling Sam he’s the one who raised him from perdition and it all comes under the umbrella of the betrayal. EVEN IF it’s true and Cas legit did come because Dean called and just was grumpy and unsentimental in his dialogue but not in his heart, Dean was left feeling isolated and miserable by Cas through the middle of the season and only had a brief recovery in 6x18 for the sole purpose of that being torn down again.

Even if Cas means it all whole heartedly now (and I think he can be telling the truth here to some degree especially about feeling included in their family) it’s not going to make it through Dean’s new defensive shell of not letting himself believe Cas any more… Cas is going to have to earn it back, and that’s something he can barely do until season 8? Like… With all the times they’re yanked apart, it’s stuff like showing up in 9x10 all “I came as soon as you called” that really starts showing the real emotional recovery? (Thanks to the Naomi setback from this in season 8 making it a raw conflict for the sake of rehashing this that needed fixing but with fresh wounds? I dunno :P)

* * *

> CASTIEL: Dean, I do everything that you ask. I always come when you call, and I am your friend. Still, despite your lack of faith in me, and now your threats, I just saved you, yet again. Has anyone but your closest kin ever done more for you? All I ask is this one thing. 

Okay then Cas moves a bit more into the emotional blackmail territory - and obviously makes a critical error making his help on finding Lisa (even though he genuinely is not responsible for that) conditional on Dean backing off and having some faith in him… I want to highlight that Cas SAYS faith though, because the FIRST time Dean ever prayed and Cas answered was in 4x18 and Cas showed up all “prayer is a sign of faith” and it was all their itty bitty baby steps together… *sobs* Faith in each other is another LONG thread between them, and given the whole angel thing is not a word thrown around lightly - here it gets corrupted completely because Cas wanting faith emotionally gets twisted around to Godstiel asking them all to kneel and love him as their new god

…

I thought this conversation took place in the same place as their conversation as 4x21 but I was wrong - Sam makes his prayer from a similar looking place, but the shelves in the background to Dean are all green instead of yellow as they were in the other spot. Green of course being a colour much more associated with poison, as this whole relationship becomes corrupted. 

I always say that 4x21 conversation is sort of their first arranged marriage anyway, so I guess this is their official divorcing scene :P Still in Bobby’s yard anyway

* * *

Awww Bobby and Dr Visyak. She is a Nice Monster™ but never says what she is and we never hear of anything like it again even with 2 of our main characters taking an extended holiday to her realm. There was the implication a whole lot of nasty lived in Purgatory that was far from the regular sort of monster but it mostly just boiled down to her and Leviathans, so the mystery about her just remains sort of annoying on the sidelines :P

* * *

> (Sam sighs. He walks though the kitchen and pours himself a drink. Balthazar appears.)
> 
> BALTHAZAR: Drinking your feelings, Sam? I thought that was your brother’s bag.
> 
> SAM: Stressful times.

Yikes. it really is :P

* * *

I’m pretty sure it was implied Balthazar was only working with Cas for survival odds over Raphael, and so him going double agent for them citing survival is in character… His concern for Cas is too - stopping Cas doing the thing has several beneficial outcomes, and he’s definitely more principled than he lets on even if just from this example of him looking for Ben and Lisa and finding them and immediately offering to go get them… I mean could have been an offer of good faith just so they’d trust him, but I can’t help thinking Balthazar does care SOMEHOW :P

> BALTHAZAR: Well, the upside is yes, uh, the downside is no, I can’t get them for you.
> 
> SAM: Why not?
> 
> BALTHAZAR: Because Crowley’s angel-proofed the whole bloody building. I guess he doesn’t trust Cas. Seems that marriage is going swimmingly.

Dean has a momentary concerned reaction shot about that too - not sure how much he’s trusting that, but anyway. Maybe he just didn’t like the idea that Cas n Crowley were married :P

* * *

Sam takes yet another blow to the head…

Actually… How many has he taken? I feel like not so many as he does in later seasons if only because I feel like I’d have been keeping a tally… He got knocked out pretty much every single episode in season 10. 

* * *

And the old demon possessed a loved one and holds a knife to a kid’s throat routine… honestly they should have a protocol for this by now it happens so often :P

* * *

Aw Lisa no

Dean in full crisis mode, and demons that go down really easily from a salt round for the sake of Ben being the one shooting them so they need to be on easiest difficulty mode.

always sad about Dean slapping Ben to get him to focus and then handing him a gun because it seems like the exact tragic Dean wanting to avoid Ben having his childhood trauma thing he was so anxious about at the start of the season

* * *

Lisa being written off like this plays a lot into othering Dean as well - in a way more than outright death for them would in terms of making him think he can’t mix these worlds: it leaves his apparent best bet for a normal family life still existing but in a step utterly removed from him, kind of, pressing face up against the shop window glass style - in a way the tether always sort of exists between them as a purposefully unresolved thing that will always be a tragedy for Dean because it was the normal life that got away…

Waaay down the line Dean still thinks that he can’t have this sort of life, and Sam describing the sort of person they might realistically marry covers characters like Eileen to use a neutral example, of someone who knows what they’re getting into. It makes a lot more sense for where they are, and I think honestly this wound will stay with Dean his entire life that because the show wouldn’t tell us this story about Dean twice, and his self-blame is so huge (he literally says it’s all his fault) it’s now an insurmountable thing that this is it for him and Lisa and Ben are symbolic of the entire concept?

Anyway I have written a LOT about the overlap and connections between Dean & Lisa and Dean & Cas, and how they’re sort of mutually exclusive? Dean loses both of them here, but only Cas comes back into his life after but I think it’s almost neat that he is really truly breaking ties with all of them in this episode? They still seem to form a love triangle just in conflict of interests? And it’s because of this unforgivable thing of using Lisa and Ben as leverage that yet more breaks are made between Dean and Cas

AND Cas is then the agent of removing Lisa and Ben from Dean’s life in this permanent way that can never be mentioned or overruled.

* * *

We’re just.. not going to discuss how wrong Dean was to do that because it’s his own pity party, he’s tired and making shitty decisions, and in the rules of this universe, Lisa is a living, happy female character who was never sexually assaulted and was only half-murdered so in the grand scheme of things her exit stage left is by far a kinder option and I see it as a sympathetic writing choice for Lisa because of that >.> Helpful as a point of data for telling Dean to stop overriding people’s bodily autonomy especially as she’s a non-Sam example, but here’s not the time and place :P

* * *

Let’s talk instead about all the voices cracking on BOTH sides for this exchange:

> DEAN: Thank you. I wish this changed anything. 
> 
> CASTIEL: I know. So do I. All else aside, I just wanted to fix what I could.

Attractive men crying at each other.  _Help_.

This choice of Cas’s is a GOOD choice in that he came here just to help and I think now well aware how much he’s lost Dean - this was tidying up loose ends for himself, for what HE felt responsible for despite not actually being responsible for this one particular thing… Cas just REALLY doesn’t like sick and injured humans? he has like two different wandering around healing people stages, and tries to teach his next angel army to go heal humans in the hospital just because in season 9… This makes my heart bleed for Cas. :( It’s enough of a character trait I can’t possibly just think he did this to gain points with Dean. 

* * *

> DEAN: I just, uh, I lost control for a minute, and I just wanted to say that I’m sorry. I’m real happy you two are both okay. And uh, I’m just - I’m glad your life can get back to normal now.
> 
> LISA: We’re okay, so - so that’s what’s important, right?
> 
> DEAN: Yeah. Anyway, uh, I’ll leave you two alone. (to Ben) You take care of your mom.

I am not above wallowing in the horrific Dean feelings from this. Even if I agree with what Sam says once Dean joins him… 

> SAM: Dean, you know, you’ve pulled some shady crap before, but this - has got to be the worst. Whitewashing their memories? **Take it from somebody who knows** - 

Like literally Dean has done this to him in the last 10 episodes… :P

Anyway the narrative forgives Dean by turning this into a tragic moment for him, and making Ben and Lisa seem happy and ready to go on with their lives (uuh… her new boyfriend is dead on their living room floor with his neck snapped…??? They’re in for a terrible terrible aftermath they can’t even explain???? Honestly when Dean shows up on the news as a serial killer in a few months I would not be surprised if Lisa saw him and was like “that’s the guy who hit us with his car and probably killed my boyfriend!”) 

Buuut they’re safely written off so we’re not asking too many questions 

* * *

And “I just lost control for a moment” is the saddest way to ever summarise what happened to Dean with Lisa because of course it’s that “control” he has that stops him ever seeking this kind of thing for himself again, except “control” is his self loathing and fear that this kind of thing would happen, and this just affirms to him that if he ever tried to have a normal relationship, his life would destroy it for him…

Ugh. :P

* * *

Anyway then Cas does a great jump scare on Dr Visyak because we’re not done killing female characters yet for the season and that was a very near miss so something has to give :P Eleanor as an expendable monster slash former love interest to Bobby is a good place to start!

* * *

(I may be slightly grumpy but this is probably my least favourite Gamble-written episode? Bah. I blame Edlund for the insurmountable episode that came right before… this is probably a really good episode if you skip TMWWBK but WHO DOES THAT?? :P)


	22. 6x22

I kind of really don’t want to watch the next few episodes, in that way where you always think that maybe THIS time when you watch/read something the characters will make less awful decisions, and actually watching it means having to face up to the fact they’re going to make them every time

* * *

I mean considering 6x20 themes of no choice and the story and stuff, that’s practically a meta comment?

Still don’t wanna

* * *

Oh no! I actually FORGOT what song plays in every season finale

*goes to get a stuffed animal*

Never mind I forgot that season 6 is so fucking ridiculous there’s no rocking out there’s just the faint sound of an endless loop of the chorus of Carry On Wayward Son playing in the background to an entire recap of the season from Swan Song to here, because there are so many plot twists to cram in there’s barely any time for it - even the random violence montages have plot exposition layered over them

Honestly 1/10 if we’re rating the available season finale montages. 

(I seem to remember season 8, with the highest number of beheadings per season of the show, and the least amount of mytharc to recap, is 10/10, then I’d guess a lot of the earlier seasons muddling in behind with a special mention for season 4′s Destiel fan video nonsense, idk, I was not rating them before now but this actually was so bad it needed a rating :P)

* * *

Run, Sam! Run!

This is like a montage of all the neon signs on the show. Finishing with an El Sol for Sam’s coma dream looming ominously in a reflection behind his shoulder

Aaaand after a whole season of this excellent title card, it finally gets to hit its home run for implying Sam’s wall broke after he says “I don’t remember anything!” *SMASH*

Dammit, unless season 12 pulls out something REALLY special, this is 11/11 the best title card, just for how freakin’ useful it is and how just about ever time it came up it was doing heavy lifting in the storytelling. :P

(Not including special edition title cards, because tbh the METATRON one still makes me chuckle years later… :P)

* * *

“Telling you, blank slate” Sam says, with an El Sol looming behind him, drinking an El Sol

The Man Who Knew Too Much flashes up over him

I actually really like the themed naming in this season, because it sort of opens and closes with these bookends on this theme that talk to each other:

  * [6.02 Two and a Half Men](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supernaturalwiki.com%2Findex.php%3Ftitle%3D6.02_Two_and_a_Half_Men&t=NzA2M2U5MTE0ZWFlZDcwNjA1MTdjMWY4M2YyZWIxZTIzN2M4NTgwOSxtWjN3aVR0TQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F141005874408%2F6x22-rewatch-i-kind-of-really-dont-want-to-watch&m=1)
  * [6.03 The Third Man](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supernaturalwiki.com%2Findex.php%3Ftitle%3D6.03_The_Third_Man&t=Y2VkNzg0YzA5NGYyZWYyMjAyZWU1NmY2ZGViMTA3N2RhMzU0YWI2ZCxtWjN3aVR0TQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F141005874408%2F6x22-rewatch-i-kind-of-really-dont-want-to-watch&m=1)
  * [6.20 The Man Who Would Be King](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supernaturalwiki.com%2Findex.php%3Ftitle%3D6.20_The_Man_Who_Would_Be_King&t=YWI0ODk0MDJiMDE3NWZiZDNhZTMzNGEyMmZlY2VhNzNiY2U1MWM2OSxtWjN3aVR0TQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F141005874408%2F6x22-rewatch-i-kind-of-really-dont-want-to-watch&m=1)
  * [6.22 The Man Who Knew Too Much](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supernaturalwiki.com%2Findex.php%3Ftitle%3D6.22_The_Man_Who_Knew_Too_Much&t=NDEwOTJjMmYyZTExZDk0ZDBkNTI2MTBkOGZhMWUzMmQ1Yjc3Yjc5MixtWjN3aVR0TQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F141005874408%2F6x22-rewatch-i-kind-of-really-dont-want-to-watch&m=1)



(I had the tab open already - I should suck it up and just use the subtitles on my DVDs but Superwiki has sort of become my bestie over this rewatch :P)

We never get a second one for Dean, but I always liked how 6x03 just casually links Cas to Sam and Dean who were the obvious two men in the title of 6x02 because it places him on an equal footing with them (I know these are all references with their own meanings specific to their episode but like, just separating them out for a moment to look at them just as titles :P) … aside from the titles in this format a lot of them tell the story, since we start with “exile on main street” and that’s for Dean, so it goes Dean on his own, Dean with Sam, and then adds Cas in.

… I dunno I’ve always been fond of season 6′s titles probably more than some of the episodes. 

* * *

I’m pretty much sitting here ranking the technical nonsense instead of watching the episode but to be fair Sam’s kind of meant to be wallowing in a no new information fugue state so aside from commenting on the bartender lady’s amazing husky voice I’m really not sure what I should be talking about :P

* * *

Oh hey that orange rug is in the motel that may or may not exist for real but is definitely saying a lot of alarming things about Sam’s inner workings.

I guess he’s making up the personality of this woman (Robin apparently) from scratch if he only knew her a few moments in a hostage situation IRL, which means she’s reflecting a whole lot about his inner workings too. I wonder what/who he’s projecting onto her… She’s kind of generically snarky yet supportive.

Which is a pretty basic model for almost every friendly character in this show.

* * *

You know, Death re-making the eclipse in season 7 is silly enough, but the fact that the rare eclipse needed happened NATURALLY to be literally “tomorrow” after Cas and Crowley found out how to open Purgatory is actually more unbelievable :P

* * *

I do wonder about the connection between virgins and Purgatory - they needed virgins to summon Eve and crack it wide enough to get her out… Now they need virgin blood mixed with monster blood to open it for THIS spell.

I suppose since Purgatory is all about purification and stuff in the classic lore/its metaphor in season 8 there’s a thematic relevance here..

* * *

*is sad for Bobby losing his 900 year old monster girlfriend right when they’d just started having cute moments again* 

wait is this a parallel to Dean losing Cas?

Don’t look at me :P

* * *

Aaaah! Cas!

*Bobby attempts to fist-fight him* 

… I am so utterly devastated by their relationship being broken too, and I’m totally feeling his rage and vengeance for a dead loved one but on the other hand the mental image of Bobby trying to fist-fight Cas is so funny I’m extremely glad Dean held him back 

* * *

> CASTIEL (shakes his head) I wish it hadn’t come to this. Well rest assured, when this is all over, I will save Sam, but only if you stand down. 

:( :( :( :(

Season 7 and Cas’s return is just SO emotionally satisfying when you watch this because they didn’t fuck this up, you know?

I mean for one thing Sam is almost immediately forgiving even within an episode of this, but basically as soon as Cas was back to himself after the memory loss he took on Sam’s trauma… I know there’s probably some grumpiness out there about it just being another way to write Cas out for the time being, but the actual emotional integrity of what was going on is basically the only reason I can watch these scenes here when Cas is tearing down the wall & any sympathy that might have been left for him with TFW and probably a lot of viewers depending on how badly TMWWBK affected them or not :P

(I was too affected, I never lost sympathy >.>)

* * *

*sad noises about Sam seeing the Impala as his as well in his head* it’s  _his car_  and he confidently guesses her on sight.

(I guess this is our last Kripke episode and he hasn’t written since Swan Song? Very pro both Winchesters having an emotional claim on the car… Dean’s connection to the car seems more profound a lot of the time and he has sort of had exclusive ownership in the last few seasons like 11x04 seems like an island in a vast ocean where Sam has blatant plot point shown on screen positive obvious emotional connections to her as well? 

… maybe Dean has just been extra possessive ever since Sam broke the “no dogs in the car” rule hence the Carver era sharp slant towards Dean’s ownership :P I feel like I have never really questioned this line in the same way as having not watched this episode since before season 10)

* * *

And then soulless!Sam shoots out one of the windows because lol the car as a metaphor for their head space

(I’m reminded of this moment with souless!Sam surrounded by broken cars with their windows knocked out)

* * *

Oh right of course Robin is actually influenced by Dean - we warp back to the outer world after she gets all weird and says “Sammy” and there’s Dean poking his comatose brother with a stick to see if he’s alive

(not really but.

I need some humour here. :P)

* * *

> BOBBY: You know, (he turns a glass over and pours a drink) this is exactly what Cas wants. For you to fall to pieces. Just try to think of what Sam would want. (He holds out the drink. Dean pauses before taking it.) 

And again with Bobby enabling Dean’s drinking… 

You know it occurs to me, has anyone ever connected Dean burning Bobby’s flask to let him move on at the end of season 7, and season 8 being one of Dean’s cleaner seasons?

Anyway. *sobbing about Cas being written and reacted about purely as the villain in this scene*

* * *

> ROBIN:  _What_  was that?
> 
> SAM: What do you mean? It’s daylight.
> 
> ROBIN: Yeah.
> 
> SAM: It was night, and now it’s day.
> 
> ROBIN: It was  _always_  day.

Me having an argument with Dabb about his driving continuity.

MAYBE SAM NEVER WOKE UP. MAYBE THAT’S HOW HE DOES IT.

* * *

I forgot that soulless!Sam in Sam’s head was wearing basically (exactly?) the same as Sam-as-Lucifer in Swan Song. I’ve seen a post making the same comparison (It’s hopefully in my tag for this episode… too tired to look) … Dean certainly worried soulless!Sam was Lucifer for a bit, and it does make you wonder about Sam’s worst side being represented by Lucifer or a Lucifer-adjacent character type (makes you think about how Souless!Sam is remembered in for laughs by the fandom as mostly being snarky in the same way…) There are differences but the fact they HAVE overlap at all is interesting.

Like, Lucifer as an external concept haunted him all his life, but the real Lucifer was in him all along? :P

* * *

I like how default!Sam has much scruffier hair… it even seems longer? Just because Soulless!Sam has it swept back but regular!Sam has it all in his face

* * *

Omg it really is the river from Purgatory in the background.

*grumbles and kicks something* I remember on my last BIG rewatch that caught me up to the end of season 9 (that year when I accidentally watched the show 3 times in one summer…), Purgatory had me laughing about just how often they ended up by that river because we see these similar woods twice in two episodes (and a few times in season 7?) always for these dramatic moments and it probably was location reuse, but with rather more time spent wallowing in the fandom and actually analysing stuff, I’m interested in this being a belatedly retconned sort of Purgatory moment for Sam. 

He’s wearing a very similar shirt the other time he goes to the actual place although it’s hard to tell with some of Sam’s more generic shirts:

([season 6](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.homeofthenutty.com%2Fsupernatural%2Fscreencaps%2Fdisplayimage.php%3Falbum%3D132%26pid%3D106039%23top_display_media&t=OTM5YzA5ZDNkNjFkOTIzMjUxYmQ0OTllNTVkMTVjMGY3ZjMxNmQzNixtWjN3aVR0TQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F141005874408%2F6x22-rewatch-i-kind-of-really-dont-want-to-watch&m=1))

([season 8](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.homeofthenutty.com%2Fsupernatural%2Fscreencaps%2Fdisplayimage.php%3Falbum%3D176%26pid%3D208380%23top_display_media&t=MWUxNzQ3YzU3ZGFjZmFhNzljMGE5NTQ1N2E3NGQxZmQxMzI1ZjJkMixtWjN3aVR0TQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F141005874408%2F6x22-rewatch-i-kind-of-really-dont-want-to-watch&m=1))

I’ve actually [written before a long long time ago](http://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/98410596963/campchitaquamemories-elizabethrobertajones) sort of indirectly about why I think Sam was able to walk right out of Purgatory as well as how I saw its use in general in season 8 as being different, better, and way more important than what we got in season 6 (*resumes teeth grinding about that* :P) but in hindsight this seems like you could probably reverse engineer the Purgatory parallel pretty easily: go from Dean in Purgatory, Sam’s brief visit, hop forwards to Dean’s imaginary Purgatory in 10x19, and then leap all the way back here once you’ve collected up all the important elements to create your own nice neat retcon. 

I’ll be honest, something that’s bugged me a lot is the stuff in The Great Escapist where Sam feels like he still needs to purify himself? (I feel bad saying this when I’m still on an Edlund high after 6x20 :P) For one thing, he walked in and out of Purgatory very easily, and, stupid world-mechanics-breaking episode or not, that has symbolic value, and also I felt like he’d suffered enough through seasons 5, 6 and 7 to warrant a full release from the mytharc, and for that walking in and out to therefore be consistent with how we’d seen Sam overcome that arc entirely… Sort of like, from 7x17 onwards any darkness in Sam should just have been his own? Meh if I make it to season 8 I’ll whine about Sam’s story more there, but anyway.

This moment with him killing off soulless!Sam/Lucifer is one hell of a weighty moment. He re-absorbs his dark side but in a huge cloud of white which looks like later angel possessions… I like the idea of Sam confronting his monstrous side(s) in a place that looks like monster heaven, and coming out the other side of this stronger and more whole, in some sort of core way, even if there is a price with the damage he collects too?

Like, even the fact he was willing to absorb the damage is this moment of defining core heroism in Sam? He’s literally made of it thanks to this?

* * *

I don’t get over defensive of Sam often but when I do… :P

* * *

(To me Sam is very often a “goes without saying” character if I ever seem to not be talking about him I keep forgetting I need to mention anything about him because it seems so obvious :P)

* * *

I haven’t even mentioned Sam lying in the panic room in such an obvious parallel to 4x21, his worst, lowest point, but now it’s for his protection from outside forces etc, even if he’s also dealing in some ways with the same trauma as in that episode??

* * *

I am actually the worst at discussing Sam episodes.

* * *

And like once he remembers shooting Robin, her stomach starts bleeding through her pale shirt, which is a Mary or Jess parallel - probably Jess more just because he felt SO responsible for her death, although not like he didn’t feel UN-responsible for Mary’s death at some point or another when learning his origin story…

Ah, reminding us of the old fridged female character trope specific to this show one last time… :P 

* * *

(Actually in narrative bookending terms, we started this season with Lisa and Ben getting this treatment as Mary and Sam in Dean’s djinn hallucination, so Sam rounding the season off witnessing this imagery probably goes back to what I was saying in 6x01 about the reboot of the show giving us its origin story once again… Probably all this stuff goes under the writers flailing around in the “what do you do once the story has ended” theme that the writers of the show, the meta!writers IN the show and the characters OF the show all have been dealing with…)

* * *

While I was typing that Balthazar showed up and said like a full minute of utterly incomprehensible dialogue. I hope it wasn’t important :P

* * *

Cut to Cas moping and feeling very alone in the world right after Balthy says about how they’re all betraying their friend… Of course I think Dean and Bobby feel rather more the betrayed party in this, but there’s some lacking viewpoint now we don’t have Edlund!Cas monologuing everything at us. 

… To make himself feel better, Cas betrays Crowley, cutting the ties that lost him all his friends, but too little too late. 

> CASTIEL: You think I’m handing all that power to the king of Hell? I’m neither stupid nor wicked.

Stuff like that is why I can’t get un-sympathetic to Cas ever :P Finally, a betrayal we can all get behind!

(TBH I’ve seen that D&D alignment chart for Cas with all the different variations of Cas at times in his life filling out every slot, but I think he really is Chaotic Good all the time, no matter what’s happening, as long as it’s actually him in there… Anyway Chaotic Good is probably the worst possible alignment to work with Lawful Evil like Crowley exemplifies for like that whole “synergy” Crowley is fond of, but on the other hand, is the only Good alignment that would probably do stuff like this for the greater good and be such easy prey to the path of good intentions… And whether Cas always intended to backstab Crowley or not, it’s certainly in character to decide it’s better to get off that ride as soon as he’s no longer useful…)

* * *

I LOVE Bobby’s place all done up as like a mausoleum or something with sinister ghost-like dust sheets and an obscene number of candles and cobwebs

I was laughing at how many candles they used to light derelict places in the early seasons, and tbh based on Sam’s inner workings, I’m going to blame that all on him. 

* * *

He’s so melodramatic.

* * *

The Sofa of Tragedy is all covered over too :(

* * *

(Honestly though ignoring what I said about Sam claiming the car and what I am about to move onto after this paragraph, there’s the fact he uses these 2 locations belonging to the other 2 members of TFW, the car and the house, but no place of his own to hash out his inner turmoil - the place you’d think Sam would retreat most into some secret Sam places, and instead he goes to places associated with family. This also emphasises how ALONE he would be in his coma if he lived out his life in it without taking the soul pieces back and waking up - the absence of Dean in the car is obvious, the absence of Bobby here seems more like he’s been dead and gone and the house left to rot without him) 

The thing I also REALLY like about this is that Bobby’s kitchen has always had slatted shutters over the windows the entire time and it’s never been A Thing, but throw in all this melodrama and let Sam run around in an imaginary version of Bobby’s, and it’s suddenly the pinnacle and end purpose of like at least 3 seasons of imagery of these shacks with boarded up windows being representative of the state of Sam’s soul/bad mental states. Like, if you want an episode on the poor state of Sam’s soul, this is it. And the biggest confrontation, the one where he has to make this huge devastating informed decision about what to inflict on himself, it’s in this setting

* * *

Hell memories!Sam looks so TIRED :( Considering he gives up without a fight and just lets Sam kill him, that does fit with a lot of meta I’ve read about Sam being passively or heroically suicidal… :(

* * *

Omg he literally tells default!Sam that Jess is somewhere out in this memory-scape

* * *

Brb, forgot that Cas tells Balthazar that “Dean Winchester” is on his way

*goes to get three blankets to crawl under* You know how Cas saying Dean’s name is like the Most Special Thing Ever? That’s him trying to make it less special and Just Some Guy I Used To Know

and I need to go sob a bit

* * *

> CASTIEL: First Sam and Dean, and now this. I’m doing my best in impossible circumstances. My friends, they abandon me, plot against me. It’s difficult to understand. 

:( :( :( :( 

Somehow Balthazar WOULD have the most OTT and beautiful angel death, like, if I have to die, I’m going out in style, and taking out all the windows in this place with me

* * *

Wasn’t it a full moon in TMWWBK?

Is anyone keeping track of this stuff?

I mean not like it matters Death can just move the moon around as he pleases 

maybe that’s part of why werewolves have been fucked up this year - people screwing with the moon having a ripple effect

* * *

I hate watching the bit where the Impala gets flipped :(

(If we’re re-treading old ground, the Impala getting smashed up and Bobby and Dean temporarily unconscious in it vaguely reminds us of 1x22/2x01… And Dean having to rebuild it after a huge loss/betrayal later)

* * *

I can’t believe 30 minutes in we’re not even done with plot twists and backstabbing when Crowley shows up with Raphael.

* * *

In all my years of watching and re-watching this show I have never been able to get over how some of the symbols to open Purgatory look like butts.

* * *

Dabb didn’t even write this episode and Sam lurch-walked all the way from Bobby’s to this place in time for the ritual

* * *

Hi Godstiel! 

*Godstiel gives Dean that really smug look like when you see your ex in the street and your hair is great and they look like shit*

* * *

*Dean tries some apologies and thanking Cas, and then brings out the whole family speech* Cas is too far gone but like really there’s always a part of me going for the good old “we don’t know that kissing Cas would convince him to give up all the Purgatory souls,  _but it’s irresponsible not to try”_  meme here. :P

I mean Dean splurged about as much feeling as possible for Dean and all his emotional repression in a scene where he’ absolutely terrified of/for Cas… I don’t think he was quite up to it, but still… :P

* * *

> DEAN: Listen to me. Listen, I know there’s a lot of bad water under the bridge, but we were family once. I’d have died for you. I almost did a few times. So if that means anything to you… Please. I’ve lost Lisa, I’ve lost Ben, and now I’ve lost Sam. Don’t make me lose you too. You don’t need this kind of juice anymore, Cas. Get rid of it before it kills us all.
> 
> CASTIEL: You’re just saying that because I won. Because you’re afraid. You’re not my family, Dean. I have no family.

*quietly sobbing*

* * *

All the ridiculous dramatic zooms this season ends on makes everything better. Thanks, Bob Singer. We know you like the zooms. 

*Bob sticks a camera directly up Misha’s nose*

* * *

Anyway spiritually this season doesn’t end until Cas walks into that lake, so I’m not actually feeling done yet but that’s the end of the episode :P


End file.
